IX

It was a bright and sunny day. The sun was up and the sky was void of clouds but it was not hot. The weather was nice. People were outside enjoying the day with their families or friends. Everyone spent the daytime relaxing and playing and frolicking under the sun. But there were two things that were much more noticeable than the nice day. It wasn’t anything different with the two young boys in their house yard as everyone. The brothers were playing with their toys, laughing together and having a very fun time. They seemed really happy and innocent. However, that wasn’t how the people around them thought. Everyone in the neighbourhood were close, they greet each other and were good friends. But it wasn’t the same with the two boys. No, nothing. No one greeted them. No one was friends with them. Be kids their age or the adults.

Especially the adults. Lee Donghae wasn’t dumb. He may be only seven years old but he knew what those people said behind their whispers and glares. He knew those people hated his family. But why, that was what he didn’t know. They tried asking them but they only answered him with scoffs, snorts, insults, and hurtful, judging glowers. Even some of the kids, those older ones, they push him to the ground and say mean things. They said he wasn’t normal. They said he was the son of demons. They told him his family was fiend. They told him they didn’t belong in the world. That they were only a waste of time and space.

But did Little Donghae do something about it? No. He didn’t. He couldn’t. Even if he knew that he should protect his parents and his brother from these insults. That he should tell them that what they were thinking was wrong. Nothing was wrong with him. Nothing was wrong with his family.

Besides, his beloved hyung did tell him to not argue with them. It was useless because whatever he would say, they would not listen to him. Let alone believe him. “Don’t worry about them, Donghae-ah. Let them think what they are thinking. What’s important is that we know those are just lies. Okay, baby brother?”

“Okay, hyung..”

But there was one more thing.

“Why don’t mommy and daddy say anything about it too?” He had asked.

“I told you already. Mommy and Daddy don’t mind them and we should too. Nothing is wrong.” That was the answer. Always. Everytime.

He was starting to doubt that though. Once when he was at school, his classmates told him his family should live in the mental hospital because that was their real home. But mental hospitals were for crazy people. Donghwa said they were not. Donghwa said he should not listen to them. Donghwa said that if Mommy and Daddy don’t mind it, then he should not too.

But they would not say those things if nothing was really wrong, right? They would not outcast him. They would not call his parents lunatics. Donghwa would let him play with the other kids. Heck, the other kids would play with him!

Donghae never really have friends in school nor in the neighbourhood. He doesn’t understand why the kids run away whenever he approached them. He doesn’t understand why they whisper things to each other while sending him hateful glares. So the little boy asked his mom once, “Mom, why do the kids hate me?”

But his mother did not give him any answer. He only got to receive a small twitch of her lips.

But he doesn’t stop there, he asked his father too, “Dad, my classmates don’t want to play with me, did I do something wrong?” This time his father gave him a pat on the head and whispered, “Nothing is wrong.” That answer never left him.

His last resort was his brother so as they were playing in the yard that day, he inquired, “Donghwa hyung, can we play with the other kids?”

He only gave him a feeble smile and replied, “Donghae-ah, I wish we can play with them too but we can’t.”

“Why?”

“Because they’re afraid of us.”

“Afraid? Why are they afraid of us? We didn’t do something wrong, right?”

“No, Donghae. Nothing is wrong. Nothing.”

Hearing that answer for the umpteenth time, Donghae decided he would no longer believe it. Donghwa always said it but it was already obvious. Especially by the time night fell and they were in dinner. His father was not with them so his brother had asked him to fetch him. “Maybe he’s still upstairs. Can you go and get him, Donghae?” Donghwa requested to which the other nodded and started to run to their father’s study.

It didn’t take long for the boy to reach his father’s room. He took grasp of the knob and turned it but the door didn’t open. He thought it was because he didn’t do it properly so he tried again. The door was locked. He resorted to knocking and not long after the door finally opened revealing his father. “Daddy, are you okay?” He asked seeing as the elder was staring and not blinking.

“I’m okay.” His father only replied and gave a soft pat on his head.

This seemed unbelievable for Donghae. His father was not okay. There’s something bothering him.

The following days, Donghae became anxious with everything around him. Especially in their house. It may be inappropriate and strange but ever since he woke up from those supposed to be comforting words, Donghae had tried to find out what it is that his family is trying to hide from him.

There were instances when it was eerily quiet in their house in the day but at night, his mother’s screams haunt him in his dreams. Unlike the peaceful morning, the nights are filled with the opposite. The whole atmosphere of the abode is nerve wrecking once it’s after dinner time. It became Donghae’s responsibility to pick up his father inside his room. Donghwa still treats their father as if he doesn’t know how to handle the utensils. And their mother’s screams still wakes them both up in the middle of the night.

Even though his family always feeds him with ‘Nothing is wrong’s and ‘Everything is fine’s, Donghae knows better than that. Slowly, by quietly observing his family, the little boy devices his own theory of what is really happening inside their house. He knows his older brother is hiding something. He can feel it. He knew he is so close to finding it out yet there was something holding him back. It doesn’t really take rocket science to understand what their parents are going through, but little Donghae can’t explain why he is afraid of finding out the truth.

On the eve of Donghae’s eighth birthday, the most tragic thing happened to his family. And it did not just prove that what Donghae had always thought was true, but also everything he thought would happen once he knew that those ‘Nothing is wrong’s are all so wrong and those ‘Everything is fine’s are not fine at all.

From then he thought it should be the other way around: Everything is wrong. And. Nothing is fine.

“What do you wish for your birthday, baby brother?” Donghwa had asked him only hours before his birthday. They were playing in the living room after their dinner and after Donghwa had washed the dishes and cleaned the kitchen. 

“I want to go to the amusement park.” He answered softly before looking up to his brother.

This answer, however, seemed unexpected as the older widened his eyes before it softened and flashed his younger sibling a sad smile. “I wish we can go but I think Mommy and Daddy can’t.”

“Why?” Donghae was visibly disappointed. What was the point in asking him what he wants when they couldn’t even give it to him?

“Well, Daddy has... Daddy has to work. A-And Mommy has.. something to do.” Donghae did not believe that one bit.

“Daddy doesn’t go to work anymore.”

“He’s working here in the house.”

“His computer is broken. I saw you throw it out.”

“Donghae..”

“Hyung! What is wrong? Mommy doesn’t go out! Daddy locks himself in his room! What secret are you keeping from me?” The youngest finally burst his tears out.

“Oh, Donghae. Please don’t cry. Nothing is wrong..” Donghwa held him in his arms but after hearing that answer over again Donghae pushed him with all his might.

“Don’t lie!”

“What? I’m not lying Donghae!”

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