Creeping, creeping, creeping.

“Mama, please, please, please.” Hu begs with pouting lips and puppy eyes and all as she grabs onto her mom’s forearm, trying to drag her back a few feet to stare into the interior of the sweet parlor.

Ae Sook hears Li Hwa scoff from behind her.

“Just one scoop of ice cream, mama. Pleaaase. Doesn't it remind you of when we were kids?”

The woman shrugs off her daughter, sending Hu into a panicked scramble after her as they get farther down the street from the shop.

“Mama! Please! I'm a good student and you never treat me out-”

“-never treats her out my ,” Li Hwa mutters under her breath.

“-so I feel like you should just buy me two scoops.”

Imo stops to stare at Hu. “Didn't you just say one scoop?”

Still clinging onto her mother's arm, she smiles up with eyes folded into crescent moons. “Two scoops would be greatly appreciated.”

Imo continues to walk away, almost to the crossway. Li Hwa and Ae Sook casually walk behind them, sidestepping Hu when they get close enough. “Okay! One scoop, that’s fine!” Hu is flat out groveling now.

Imo abruptly stops, causing Hu to bump into her mother. The older woman reaches over for the small purse cradled in her left elbow with a sigh. Her right hand disappears into the bag only to pull out a small clutch that produces a $20 won bill.

Hu trembles in excitement as she watches the paper bill between her mother’s fingers. Hu’s hands extend upward for the green paper which she clearly thought would fall into her hands, but instead, it is passed over to Li Hwa who accepts it with a blank stare and pockets it without a second glance.

Relief is present on Hu’s face, but so is annoyance. “Mama, why’d you give it to her? I’m the one who wants the ice cream.”

Imo shuts her clutch with a loud snap. “Go with your sister and Ae Sook to get ice cream. Only lord knows what would happen to all the money if I gave it solely to you. I’ll wait here outside until you get it.”

Hu opens a bit, almost as if in protest, but then she quickly closes it and grabs Li Hwa’s arm instead.

“Ice cream, here we come!”

Ae Sook is left behind the dust until a hand reaches behind for her, grabbing at her upper bicep with a strong force. Just like that, Ae Sook is taken by surprise as she's pulled to the front of the shop.

Hu goes ahead without the two of them, already inside ordering as she's plastered against the glass window, her eyes tracking the way the employee’s hand moves as the lady uses her utensils to put the ice cream inside Hu’s cup.

Ae Sook laughs at the sight, looking to Li Hwa to see her reaction, and even though her face holds a hint of lightness to it, there’s something serious about it. Ae Sook doesn't think about it too much, and starts forward to cross the threshold, under the impression that she's going to order her ice cream. Instead, Li Hwa holds her back with a gentle hand on her arm. Ae Sook turns around, questioning the motion.

“Stay with me here for a bit, will you?” Li Hwa asks, releasing her grip on her cousin.

With a quisitive glance, Ae Sook steps away from the door’s entrance and goes to stand on Li Hwa’s left on the adjacent wall.

“No ice cream?”

“Don't worry about it, Hu has it covered. Dark Chocolate, am I right?” Li Hwa asks, confirming Ae Sook’s favorite flavor. Li Hwa glances back through the window, to see that Hu is nowhere near done as she is trying almost every flavor possible all while chatting with the employee. Next she glances to her mother, who is currently on her phone. A moment of silence passes between the two cousins.

“You know, if I was you, I don't think I could've handled it,” Li Hwa says first, breaking the comfortable pause.

Ae Sook turns to her cousin with eyebrows raised in shock. Li Hwa is looking across the street, a bit to the sky, and Ae Sook can say she is ultimately shocked at the revelation. As long as Ae Sook has known her cousins, Li Hwa has been the strong individual, the graceful princess that was soft-spoken yet bold at the same time, and not once has she seen her cousin show a lapse of strength. The fact that the girl was suggesting Ae Sook showed more strength than her was astonishing.

Before Ae Sook can say anything, Li Hwa continues.

“And I'm so sad you had to go through that.” This time, Li Hwa looks straight into Ae Sook’s eyes. “But I know you're one of the only people strong enough to take it. Now, I don't wanna preach or anything, because I know that it's pretty messed up to have that happen and I know it's better not to talk about it, but it happened and there's no way out of it.”

Li Hwa looks at Ae Sook, almost as if trying to see whether or not it's okay for her to continue on. To be honest, Ae Sook hasn't been spared any of these speeches and more than raw emotions now, it's like routine, so it doesn't bother her nearly as much as it did 4 days ago. Yet she knows this is the one speech that she should listen to, so she nods her head slightly in approval. If it's anyone she should hear it from, it's Li Hwa.

Her cousin’s eyes soften at the gesture.

“I'm sure you know we can't stay here for too long, since our classes are still going on, and trust me, I wish we could, but we can't.”

Ae Sook's stomachs sinks, and she knows where this is going. They're leaving and I'm going to be alone. She begins to curl into herself just slightly at the thought. She had been oblivious, and she didn't think it would come so soon.

“But we can't leave you here either.”

Ae Sook blinks at this part. “What do you mean?”

“Well, we know you're an adult and all and you’re free to make your own decisions, but we’re your guardians, we’re your family, and we love you so much. You're practically sisters to us already, to me and Hu.”

Ae Sook scrunches her brow. Where is she going with this?

“So come to China and live with us.”

Ae Sook’s eyes widen considerably. “China?”

Li Hwa nods. “That's what my mom's talking to the legal agents about right now. She's been meaning to ask you before, but she first wanted to make sure everything was ready to go so that you wouldn't feel stressed about it, but honestly, I wanted to ask you before that. I know it's a big step, but it's possible to transfer schools, especially since it's winter break and you would live with us. Plus, you already speak Chinese pretty well, if not fluent. You would be fine.”

Ae Sook is at a loss for words. It's like the oasis of words in her head had dried up to nothing but a dirt-caked ravine that would produce no coherent reply. Ae Sook knows that before, she wanted anything, still wants, to be near her family and to not be alone, but leaving the country was not something that she had in mind. It wasn't just a big step, but it was a life changing one. She would be leaving her home, her school, Da Bin and Sae Ryun (though the latter was hardly a thing to be sad about)...and her parents. Metaphorically, she had already left them once and she doesn't think she could leave them again.

A jingle from the opening doors of the ice cream parlor sounds, revealing a struggling Hu who is trying to her cone and balance two cups on her forearm all while opening the door.

Li Hwa looks to Ae Sook one last time, reaching out to touch her arm. “Think about it, alright? We don't need an answer right away.”

Ae Sook opens to say something, she doesn't know quite what, but before she has the time to form her words, Li Hwa has already left to take her ice cream from her sister.

Ever since Li Hwa has revealed that certain piece of information to Ae Sook, it has prevented her from thinking about anything related to any other topic than the one of China.

Not only having an affected mind, it seems to be affecting her body too, because throughout the entire 15 minute walk that it takes to get to one of her aunt’s favorite restaurants, Ae Sook has been a constant lagging step behind, just far enough from the group that her aunt and cousin had formed to make it look like she was involved, but not close enough to be engaged.

It allowed her to take a moment to observe the other part of her life. Her cousins, so kind and beautiful, were practically sisters to her, and she had no doubt that her aunt and uncle wouldn’t treat her like their own. She wouldn’t be a Cinderella, but more like a queen if she moved to China, because she wouldn’t have to deal with her evils associated with this land.

She would be given a clean slate to start over and forget the pain that was there.

But for some reason, there was something that was tying her down that prevented her from leaving. Call it revenge or guilt, the persistent emotion was there, and Ae Sook had a feeling that it wouldn’t go away until she acted on it.  

At all the thoughts, Ae Sook winces. She hates being a stupid little girl who can’t make up her mind.

She wants to go but then she doesn’t.

She doesn’t want to be alone, but then she does.

She hates how this situation has made her weak, and she hates it even more how she needs to be dependent on people. She doesn’t want anyone to be affected by what she’s going through, and by her cousins asking her to go, she’s already had an impact on them.

It was time for her to grow up.

Her parents weren’t there to make things right for her, and it was time she took her pain like an adult and make rational decisions based on the things already present in her life.

“I’m not going to China,” Ae Sook blurts.

Both her cousins and aunt stop immediately. Ae Sook’s aunt is the first to turn around, followed by a blank-faced Li Hwa and a confused Hu.

“What do you mean?” Imo asks, her brows drawing together. Her hands reach down to clutch her purse tighter to her side, which Ae Sook assumes is a motion as natural as her reaching for the necklace strung around her neck – either the pearl one or the one that she wore the night of her parents’ murder.

Ae Sook glances briefly at Li Hwa before she responds, whose face reveals a measure of understanding that highlights her warm emotion.

“Li Hwa told me about what you were thinking, about bringing me to China. I think it’s a great idea, and if I didn’t have as many mixed feelings as I did now, I would have said okay and gone, but now, I don’t think I can.” At the beginning, Ae sook’s words were as strong and fast as the winter wind that battered her clothes in that instant, but as she reached the end of her confession, they became as soft and slow as the snowflakes that painted the city white.

Her aunt looks to Li Hwa, passing a look that Ae Sook can’t decipher before she turns back to face her. “Are you positive that this is what you want?”

Ae Sook bites her lip. Is it?

Something in her mind convinces her it is. “Yes.”

At the response, Imo moves her way from the front of the group to a position in between Li Hwa and Hu so that she’s closer to Ae Sook. “I don’t want to leave you by yourself.”

“Imo-,” Ae Sook begins.

“I know what it’s like to lose someone,” her aunt interrupts, a haunted look coloring her eyes that Ae Sook has never seen before. “And I don’t think it’s ever hurt more than to stay in a place that is full of memories. I want to give you this option, because at that time, I didn’t have it.”

Almost like they’re listening to her aunt, the once fluffy snow clouds become condensed into dark monsters, boiling with convection currents that almost show an anger that was long suppressed.

“I got the same speeches you’re getting now. ‘It takes time to heal’, ‘I know it hurts’, ‘You’re learn to live with it’. It doesn’t stop until you make it, and when I left, I think it was the best decision I ever made, because otherwise, I would have never healed.”

Ae Sook doesn’t know what to say, and it looks like this declaration wasn’t known by either of her cousins with their staring faces. They’re biting their lips, a type of guilty look painted on their faces at the lack of knowledge about their mom’s suffering. Ae Sook could say her look only mirrors theirs.