Disclaimer: I do not in any shape or form own BAP and make no profits from this story.

Jongup stayed behind at Himchan’s hospital room, waiting for him to regain consciousness.

The remaining four inner members of BAP sat around Yongguk’s living room, each sporting a deep, concentrated look. No one dared utter a sound. After Sae Kyung left the hospital, she fell off the map and no one could get into contact with her. It's been three days since they've last seen her. They should have chased after her the second she left the room however no one really realized how serious she might be about her threat until she was long gone. They assumed she just needed to cool off but the more out of contact she was, the more apparent it became that she really might go to try and kill Block B by herself. It is one thing to try and take their territory, and a whole other thing to try and attempt to kill one of their people.

This is war.

Each member could feel it deep in their bones, the ferocity and malice in this battle between two rival gangs.  This is way past vying for petty land rights and sources of monetary income, this is the slaughtering of those too weak to survive.

“Still no word?” Yongguk asked. Zelo shook his head and stood, walking towards the kitchen.  Pulling out a glass cup, Zelo poured himself a glass of whiskey to calm his nerves. The most unnerving thing he read from Sae Kyung a few hours before was just the pure, raw terror that screamed from her eyes, the desperation of a woman who was backed into a corner and had nowhere to go. That wasn’t the right emotion in that situation. The fingerprint scan pad beeped once before admitting Sae Kyung. Zelo was the first to reach her and give her a once over to see if she was injured or in pain. She seemed to be perfectly fine, save for the devoid of emotion on her features.

“Noona, where were you? None of us could reach you.” Zelo frowned, trying his best not to profile her but finding it difficult. Yongguk reached the front door and scowled at the female who actively avoided his gaze.

It was hard for Zelo to read anything, her face was the picture perfect capture of someone who mastered the art of covering their emotions, save for the miniscule wince she gave as she met Yongguk’s eyes. Her eyes reached his for a second, the slight glare of accusation like she knew what he was doing, before she looked past the both of them and headed towards the spare room in their leader’s apartment.

Yongguk followed her with his eyes, the harsh scowl still present, while instructing to the rest of them, “I want Daehyun and Youngjae to go to Busan and check on things over there. We can’t afford to lose anything else to those bastards. Zelo, go to our Southern region and let Jongup know he is to go to our East region. I’ll stop by East Seoul and send Sae Kyung to you later. Give a status report and I’ll let you know what our next step is. Fortify our safe houses, that is our priority.”

Without another word, the rest of them dispersed, Zelo taking the longest to leave even though he was closest door. Yongguk shook his head and nodded his head towards the door. Giving the elder one last look, Zelo exited the premise and joined the other two in the elevator.

“I still don’t trust her.” Youngjae muttered, his gaze focused intently on Daehyun.

“We honestly don’t have any reason not to trust her. I trust Yongguk hyung’s judgement. And so should you.” Daehyun said with a dismissive tone. The other sulked but didn’t pursue it longer.

Zelo couldn’t help but let Youngjae’s words take weight. Something about her was off and he couldn’t quite put his finger on it.

“We’ll get there in a couple hours if things go our way. Let Yongguk know we’re taking the police siren.” Daehyun looked towards Zelo who offhandedly nodded, his brain lost in thought.

Zelo walked towards his car still stewing over Sae Kyung. His gut told him that she was trustworthy but at the same time, she wasn’t telling the whole truth about herself. Was that enough to distrust her and her judgement? There are things everyone hides, even Zelo himself had things that no one knew about even Yongguk. Shaking his head, Zelo sat behind his wheel as his engine purred to life.

Daehyun was right. Yongguk hyung trusted her, therefore he would trust her.

Yongguk downed the rest of Zelo’s drink, allowing his nerves to stew as the alcohol coursed through his blood. Sae Kyung terrified him more than he cared to admit. The amount of pure emotion he felt for her didn’t sit well with his personality. He was a tough, rational, tactical planner, and a cold blooded gangster however everything ceased the moment he met Sae Kyung. She brought out his hot blooded emotion which made it difficult for him to make rational decisions based on logic and fact.

Taking a deep breath, he knocked once before entering his spare room. Sae Kyung sat on the window sill facing the city lights, a defeated slump in her shoulders. He felt his resolve flicker just a tiny bit but hardened it when she turned to look at him, an emotionless mask on her face.

“Where did you go?” His deep voice rasped, a slight trace of heat in his question.

“I’m a grown woman. I can go where I want.” She retorted, her mask slowly breaking into anger with exasperation filtering in.

“We’ve just had one of our warehouses taken. More men than I want to claim have been murdered. We cannot have an inside member AWOL right now. What if something happened to you?” The unspoken question rang through the pregnant silence.

“Yongguk, I wouldn’t let myself get killed. If you think I would let a rookie mistake like that hap-”

“Do you think Himchan made a rookie mistake?” Sae Kyung’s nose flared in accusation at the mention of Himchan’s name.

“Don’t you dare bring up his name.”

“That could have easily been you. If he had been just a second la-”

“So you’re happy he’s on the hospital bed? That should have been me!”

“Exactly! And as much as I hate that he is on the bed at all, I’m glad it’s him and not you!”

“How can you say that? He is in there in pain and you’re happy I’m here?” Sae Kyung barked as she stood in righteous anger against the leader.

“You know why!”

“No, Yongguk, I really don’t.” Sae Kyung said, her eyes challenging him to say the words he’s been afraid of to say. She knew he wouldn’t risk being that vulnerable and she wasn’t ready to hear it. His eyes softened, and he took a step towards her. Her brain screamed at her to step back but her body refused to listen to her hysterical internal screaming. Slowly, he placed his hand against her cheek into her hair and ran his thumb down her face.

“Sae Kyung…” Before he could finish the sentence, Sae Kyung pressed her lips against his softly. She had never kissed him before and was surprised at how soft his lips were. Yongguk moved forward to deepen the kiss however Sae Kyung stepped back and regarded him with sorrowful eyes.

“Yongguk, don’t say something you’ll regret. What we have is good. Don’t make it into something it’s not.” She murmured. Yongguk’s mouth opened as if to retort but closed, as did the emotions streaming past his eyes.

“Is that what you really want?” He beseeched one last time, vowing to never pursue this again if she refused.

Sae Kyung paused, knowing the gravity of her answer will carry on and change their relationship forever, no matter what answer she gave. Could she really let him in to her inner world? If she had met him before everything that happened because of Block B, she wouldn’t have hesitated letting him in but now? She had way too much baggage, more than Yongguk could probably handle. And if she was honest with herself, the amount of affection she read from him intimidated her. It was more than she could ever wish for, Sae Kyung had no doubt that what he felt for her was 100% real. It broke her heart that she had to decide, why couldn’t they have just stayed as they were?

“Yongguk, I… I can’t sa-”

“It’s fine. I get it. You have to go to our Southern region with Zelo. He’ll be waiting for you.” Yongguk said, his monotone voice shattering the rest of Sae Kyung’s heart. The light had left his eyes and he moved with a swiftness fitting a cold leader towards his door.

“Yongguk, please. I’m just not ready.” Sae Kyung implored to her leader. He faltered, his back still towards her but refusing to face her.

“I know. We’ll have this conversation another day.” Turning around, he gave her a weak smile, “Let my broken male pride have this moment.” Without another word, Yongguk left the spare room and out of the apartment.

Sae Kyung let out a wry smile but let him go anyways knowing that his bruised male ego was hurt. She cursed herself for being so weak, afraid of letting him in but couldn’t risk the potential backlash that could occur. Maybe if everything has calmed down, she could start from the beginning with him.

But even that was a big if.

sorry having major writer's block. don't hate me....