chapter ii: felix felicis
always tickle a sleeping dragon : a series of bangtan oneshotsfelix felicis : also known as liquid luck. a magical potion that makes the taker successful in all their endeavors.
characters that appear + facts about them:
1. kim taehyung: fourth year; muggle-born, gryffindor. ½ of the reincarnation of the weasley twins.
2. park jimin: fourth year; half-blood, gryffindor. ½ of the reincarnation of the weasley twins.
3. jeon jungkook: second year; pureblood, slytherin. from a very old, very noble family. a pissbaby.
total word count: 1,333
*note: if you're on mobile, the text doesn't fit on the page. what you should do is save it offline and read it from there :~)
"Hey, no offense, but why are you still here?" Yoongi drawls, laying on the hard-as-a-rock couch that he dubs as Slytherin's mascot. It's probably been here longer than Professor Flitwick's smelly coat, and it's definitely uncomfortable, but Yoongi has very little s to give even on his best days, and even more so when he’s nursing a hangover and capable enough to puke all over the dark, luscious carpet that was probably way more comfortable than what he’s laying on now.
It is a nice day. There are warm rays of sunshine peeking through the gaps between curtains. Yoongi doesn’t like it and half wonders if there is a spell to transport the sun to another dimension, but that probably wouldn't settle well with Seokjin, so he settles for draping an arm over his eyes.
"I heard you and Seokjin-hyung were dating." Jungkook replies with relative ease, expression unfaltering as he fiddles with his overgrown bangs. "Don’t you think he’s kind of, you know, out of your league?”
The first thing Yoongi wants to do is grab his wand and hex Jungkook. That proves to be kind of impossible, seeing as how he is incapable of anything other than letting out a series of weak, agonized groans. With all his might, Yoongi chances throwing the nearest object—an empty, wooden box—at the younger Slytherin (Jungkook, however, dodges it with no problem at all).
“You reek of brandy with rum and vodka mixed together, Yoongi-hyung.”
Scowling, Yoongi bites back, but the force isn’t there. “Yeah and what? You smell as if there’s literally sunshines and rainbows shooting out from your .”
“That doesn't make any sense, hyung." Frowning, Jungkook picks back up the thrown object (sniffs his robes while he's at it), ignoring the fact that Yoongi has always been extra mouthy when he is pissed, and continues his lecture. "Plus, I told you not to get drunk with those Gryffindors. And yet here you are, dying. I hope you get alcohol poisoning one day.”
“Can't believe Seokjin thinks you’re a ing god damn angel. At least you know your honorifics, unlike those other brats.”
“You sure talk a lot for someone who is dead.”
“And you sure talk a lot for someone who doesn't deserve to!”
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the night before.
Brandy is good for the soul. That is, unless you are Kim Namjoon. Who could get pissed drunk and -faced over just a bottle of cheap, muggle beer (courtesy of Taehyung, who really is too young to be owning any kind of alcohol, and if Seokjin found out, Yoongi would be so—).
"You muggles and your intolerance towards alcohol, what gives?" Yoongi slurs, shoving the bottle towards Hoseok's slouching figure. "How pitiful."
"Technically hyung, you're really the only drunk one."
"Oh, off."
“That’s not wha—” Hoseok starts, only to receive a sharp glare from Yoongi. They’re in Hoseok’s dorm tonight (Yoongi is sure he shares it with two other boys, but at this point, he could care less where they are).
“Don’t you dare.” Yoongi says steely, tugging the half-empty bottle of brandy out of Hoseok’s grasp and chugging it down. He picks up a wrapped chocolate frog and shoves it into his mouth. The taste of chocolate and alcohol mingled together is bittersweet on his tongue, but who cares (clearly not Min Yoongi).
“Hyung, I don’t understand.” Namjoon finally says, suddenly looking up towards the other two, eyes full of despair. “Why won’t Seokjin notice me?”
“He already has, you bird brain.” Yoongi snaps back, clearly understanding where this conversation is heading to—he’s had it with the other two far too many times to be okay with it.
“I mean,” Namjoon starts again, almost groveling at this point, “Why would he be interested in someone like you? What’s so special about having a wand stuck up your twenty-four seven? Do I have to be as lame as you to finally get him to lik—”
Insulted, Yoongi thwarts the back of Namjoon’s head, growling in distaste, “I am very interesting, thank you very much. Am I not, like, the handsomest guy in the world?”
“Sure, hyung. And I’m Beyonce.”
“I am very much in his league, thank you very much!” Yoongi retorts back.
“No one said you were out of his league, hyung.” A new voice appears from behind him, wrapping their arms around his waist from where they are lying on the ground. It's Jimin, who’s smiling up at him as Taehyung flops onto Hoseok’s messy bed. “We were just wondering why someone like Seokjin would date someone like you.”
Pushing Jimin off of him, Yoongi flails his arms in the air, “That’s basically the same thing!”
“No but really Yoongi, how did you even get Seokjin to like you? Don’t tell me you stole one of Slughorn’s Amortentia potions.”
“I didn’t use a love potion on him!” Yoongi snaps once again, clearly not liking the idea of being ganged up on. What in the names of Merlin is wrong about Seokjin liking him anyways? Yoongi is a total boyfriend material.
————————————————
Yoongi has always been light sleeper, so when he feels eyes on him he rouses from his nap. He opens his eyes half-expecting it to be Jungkook again, readying an insult on the tip of his tongue. Instead, he’s met with a faceful of Seokjin in all of his glory (Yoongi needs to remind himself to tell Seokjin how good yellow looks on him). His hair is tinted a soft brown color due to the flickering fire. That doesn't distract Yoongi from missing the frown casted on his face, however.
He doesn’t like that look on Seokjin, so he says just that, “You look better smiling, hyung.” Yoongi says groggily, reaching out an arm to grab onto Seokjin’s hand. It’s soft, just like everything else about him.
“Flattery will get you nowhere.” Seokjin mumbles grudgingly, but lets himself fall onto the hard couch. “I didn’t see you during breakfast, the Slytherin prefect told me that you skipped out on your duties, and Namjoon told me that you weren’t with them during their trip to Honeydukes.”
Draping his body all over Seokjin’s lap, Yoongi curls in on himself, taking Seokjin’s hand and placing it on top of his head, “I was sleeping.”
“You smell like alcohol.” Seokjin deadpans, and the frown is still etched on his lips, but he starts running his hands along Yoongi’s hair anyway. “Do I need to remind you that you guys are underage?”
“It wasn’t even that much. The chocolate frogs helped. Plus, Namjoon wanted to have a manly feels night,” Yoongi replies, although he vaguely remembers the topic of last night being ‘why is Seokjin with Yoongi anyways?’.
Yoongi sighs contently, rubbing his cheek against Seokjin’s thighs before stretching himself out, so that he is practically all over the other’s lap. He knows Seokjin isn’t really mad at him (it’s merely his maternal instincts kicking in, even if Yoongi technically is his boyfriend). “Don’t worry, mom. I will swear off drinking until I am legal.”
“I don’t appreciate your sarcasm, Min Yoongi.”
Yoongi is ready to reply with another cheeky remark when he sees Jungkook enter the common room in his peripheral vision. It’s a hit or miss kind of chance and so Yoongi quickly grab Seokjin by the tie, pulling him in for a kiss. Their lips crash haphazardly, Seokjin letting a noise of reluctant protest but still ever so accommodating, pulling Yoongi closer by the hair. The hard couch is digging on his , Yoongi is positive that he smells like , and at this angle, it’s a bit awkward, but Seokjin tastes like the peppermint candy he has in his pockets.
The kiss lasts for only a couple of seconds, but when they pull apart and Yoongi manages to clear the haze in his mind (it always comes with kissing Seokjin), Yoongi catches the sound of footsteps stomping up the stairs towards the dorms.
He smirks.
Eat that, Jeon Jungkook.
author's note: YALL ASKED FOR YOONJIN AND WE ARE HERE TO DELIVER. but we hope your expectations weren't too high because we don't know what we're doing. is this even a hp!au ? ? but nevertheless, please enjoy!
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