Thirteen Weeks Later...

Whereas Sumin’s apartment in Seunghyun’s building was dark and covered in shadows, her room in the Seoul Psychiatric Hospital was the opposite. The walls and linens and even the furniture were a sterile white, and the vertical window that centered the back wall allowed her full view of the mid-November snowfall that had dusted the hospital grounds, making the world outside look just as white as her world inside.

It had been three months, three long months. She had only just recently began to feel normal in that she could wake in the morning and not be seized by instant terror, and could go to bed at night and not fear the dreams to come. The doctors that had been working with her had tried various combinations of medication, and it seemed that their latest trial of pills was working. Her thoughts were clear and she no longer made threats of suicide. Still, they took precautions, not allowing anything in her room with which she might use to harm herself.

For this reason, her room had no mirrors. The glass itself was a concern in that it could be shattered with the resulting shards each a possible weapon, but it was the mirror itself and the reflection it cast that was of most concern. The doctors didn’t think that Sumin was ready yet to see daily reminders of what she had done.

She wondered sometimes how Taeyeon was dealing with everything that had happened. She could only surmise that SM had covered up any trace of the ordeal. She had no way of truly knowing though, as she wasn’t allowed access to the internet or any other news source. The only information she could gather about the outside world came in the form of rumors from other patients, through which she learned that Jessica had since left SNSD. That seemed to be the only news out of SM recently, and the details were sketchy.

She sat up in her narrow bed now, eyeing her stark surroundings. It was Sunday, which was the only day she was allowed visitors; however, no one had ever come to visit her and so she didn’t expect that today would be any different. She thought about just going back to sleep but knew that the doctors frowned upon that. They wanted her to rise each morning and face the day rather than sleep it away. And so she stood and began making her bed, straightening the starchy sheets and tucking the corners of the thin coverlet in neat folds beneath the mattress.

There was a knock at her door then. It was a courtesy knock that all the doctors gave before entering. Dr. Kim stepped inside, his smile wide like usual. “How are you doing today, Sumin?” He looked over at the bed she had just made. “Looks like you’re improving on pleating those corners.”

Sumin looked down, trying not to find it depressing that her greatest accomplishment today would be a perfectly-made bed.

“We have a special treat for you this morning,” Dr. Kim said. “Your cousin is here to see you.”

“My… what?” Sumin stuttered.

A man stepped inside from behind the doctor, a man Sumin had never seen before. To her knowledge, her parents hadn’t had any siblings, which made it quite impossible for her to have a cousin. She stared at the man curiously as he took another few steps forward.

“Well, I’ll leave you two to enjoy your visit,” Dr. Kim said, before closing the door behind him.

As soon as the doctor was gone, the strange man quietly greeted Sumin in a deep voice that she instantly recognized.

“Seunghyun?” she asked, as she slowly approached him. She reached up to touch his new face, gently brushing her fingers across his forehead. His eyebrows, once striking, were now fairly plain and finely plucked. She swept her fingers down his cheek and then across his mouth, feeling how round his once narrow face had become, and how plump his once thin lips, likewise, had become.

Seunghyun kissed her fingertips. “I’m sorry,” he said.

Sumin shook her head. “It doesn’t matter now,” she said.

“It does matter,” Seunghyun said. “I need you to know that I wasn’t trying to hurt you by letting her go.” He looked at her, his face weighed down by his guilt. “What she said to you, about trying to help you that day when you were kids… I realized in that moment that… that’s what I wanted, too. I wanted to help you. I just didn’t know how to do that other than to let her go.”

“You were right to let her go,” Sumin quickly said. “I know that now.” She paused. “To be honest, I knew that back then, too. As soon as I saw her, I felt… relief. Just… relief that it was finally over.”

Seunghyun let out a deep breath as his tense shoulders relaxed, her words seemingly lightening his burden of guilt. “I’m sorry for not coming to see you right after—”

“Don’t be,” she said, as she once again reached up to touch Seunghyun’s new face. “I see now why you took so long to visit me.”

Seunghyun placed his hand on hers. “It took a long time to heal.”

Sumin nodded, relating to his words in more ways than one.

“She said she wouldn’t press charges if I let her go,” Seunghyun said. “But I think she would’ve said just about anything to escape, so after I dropped her off, I drained my bank accounts and went to stay with an old friend of mine who I knew would do the surgery for me.” He breathed in deeply then and studied Sumin's face. “You know, when you get out of here, I can talk with my friend about your face, too. Maybe he can—”

“It’ll be a long time before I’m out,” Sumin said. “Years, maybe.”

“Well, I… I’d like to come see you again if that’s okay with you.”

Sumin smiled. “Yeah,” she said. “That would be good.”

Seunghyun looked intently at her, as if debating what to say or what to do next, but then he just sighed and said his goodbyes. “See you next Sunday then,” he whispered, before turning for the door. Just as he reached for the handle though, he seemed to have a change of heart and quickly turned to kiss her. It was a brief kiss, but it was all that seemed to be needed in that moment.

“We can try to start over,” Sumin whispered, as their lips parted. Even as she said those words, she wondered if it was indeed possible. Perhaps they were each too damaged to have any semblance of a clean slate. But maybe that was okay. Maybe they didn’t need to start so cleanly.

Seunghyun nodded. “You know, the way I was when we first met, it was all just me pretending to be someone I’m not.” He let out a quiet laugh. “But you know that already, I think. I guess what I’m trying to say is that we all have multiple faces that we wear. Sometimes it just takes a while before we find out who we really are.”

“I know,” Sumin said. “Only I’m just starting down that road now.”

“So am I,” he quietly said. He smiled and left then, the door slowly closing behind him.

The End