The lights were off when Zitao came home from work, a usual site to see for the last three months. The only indication of light was from the master bedroom. Food left in the microwave covered in plastic wrap with a note of what was prepared. He could only sigh at the food before removing the wrap and placing it back in the microwave as he pressed in the time for it to heat up. Western spaghetti was always his favorite dish, even if he was around noodles all day. He loved it especially how his wife made it.

But of course she no longer came out to greet him like she used to.

Shoes already off at the front door and keys from the shop are thrown onto the coffee table as he made his way down the hall. Zitao really hoped Qian was in a better mood today than the last nights since then.

It even pains him to think about it but then he wasn’t a woman, never to have the burden she has been facing. The depression that has consumed her; the cries of every night Zitao holds her close to his chest to assure her that he will never leave.

Turning the knob ever so lightly he entered their shared room, meeting a mount under the black covers of their king sized bed. “I’m home.” He spoke softly.

There was a shift in the sheets and a head of black, silky hair poked through. “Welcome home.” 

Zitao could feel a small grin form on his face when he saw her, she showered today. That was always a good sign and paced his way over to his love. The bed dipped slightly from his weight as he snuggled up against her back, looping an arm over her and around her waist, making sure to kiss every spot he could see, hoping to get a positive reaction.

She stayed still in his embrace, snuggling only slightly against his chest. So far so good, he thought.

Well that was until he heard the sound of sniffles and a paper crinkling. Just hearing that combination made him want to burst into tears, but he couldn’t. He can’t cry just yet for their loss until Qian gets better, he is her strength.

Raising himself on his elbow, Zitao placed his head on top of Qian’s, “Your favorite foreigner came to visit today. He is excited for the small party we are going to throw for him.” He said giving her a light kiss to the temple before looking at the picture in her shaky hands that was the source of the noise.

He wondered why she did not answer him; her focus on what was grasped in the palm of her left hand. And it made his heart break.

A baby. No more than hours old in the arms of a tired looking but smiling Qian was their daughter Lei in her pink hat and booties. She was sleeping when Zitao snapped the photo. He remember so clearly that beautiful moment. The first photo of their family.

But also their last.

“Do you think she would have been as tall as you?” A small raspy whisper caught his attention that only made him hold tighter.

“S-She…,” it was difficult to find the words but he has spoken of them many times before, “Our daughter was going to be the most beautiful in the world because she looks just like her mother. My height is only the mild bonus compared to you my dear.”

“I miss her Zitao.”

“I miss her too.”

It was silent among them for a moment, both remembering the horror at the hospital that unfaithful night. Their daughter not breathing suddenly on their day of discharge. How they carted her way with Qian in a hysterical mess and Zitao holding onto her. When the doctor came back to tell them of the news; her lungs were not properly developed like they thought, dying in her mother’s arms only hours before. All too late.

When they thought they were so close to their dream of a family, it was all taken away before their eyes.

Qian turned in the sheets and looked up to her husband with glassy eyes before hiding in his chest and sobbing. He wrapped both his arms around her as tightly as he could while she cried. Her coherent words between sobs of being a horrible mother and not noticing her baby was hurt. It pained him to see her like this. How she believe he no longer loved her. Three months of nothing but pain and all Zitao could do was make sure Qian knew she was still loved. Zitao rubbed her back and told of nothing but sweet words, that nothing was her fault. That their precious baby Lei was in a better place, looking over them.

“I-I’m sorry I-I can’t give you a-a baby!” At those words Zitao could no longer hold back his tears, the strength for Qian was gone the moment he cried with her. Let everything go and mourned over the death of their baby. Never letting her go as he rocked them both. “N-Nothing is your fault you hear! I will love you until my soul is stripped from my body! Nothing will change that.” Whispering those last few words close to her ear and placing a chaste kiss on her soaked cheek.

They both continued to cry throughout the night. Zito made sure Qian would fall asleep to his words of comfort. No matter how long it took. He needed her to know; she herself needed to know as he was the only one who held her high. Their tears stained their cheeks and bags rested under their closed eyes when the sun peaked through the bedroom blinds. But not once did Zitao remove his hold on Qian.

She fell asleep to his words, she will wake up in his warmth. Reminded that she is not alone.

I probably should of stated this in the first chapter but the first three will be light prologues into each couples lifes and their situations, kinda like a more detailed description from the forward. I know the chapters aren't that long to begin with but I loose motivation pretty quickly if I try to write too much detail at once. Sorry in advance I'm not very floral ;-;. While this story may not be 50+ chapters, it may get lengthy. /gets bricked. Okay I'll stop talking now!