“If only you could just choose me?” Kai sighed as he read at what he wrote on his notebook. “I’m really hopeless aren’t I?” then he threw himself on his bed. “Aren’t I hopeless... following Luhan here...” Kai was surprised when he heard a knock, he immediately sit straight.

“Kai?” Kai heard a voice from the other side of the door so he immediately opens it. “Why are you so slow?!”

“And why should I open it—“ Luhan didn’t said any word, he immediately welcomed himself on Kai’s room in the dorm. Both Luhan and Kai were living on the same building but Kai is located above Luhan’s room.

“You should!” Luhan demanded. “...because I’m Luhan, Kai’s only best friend!” Kai sighed again. To Luhan, Kai is just his bestfriend, little did Luhan know, Kai likes him so much to the point of following him even in college. “You see... Kai...” Kai was surprised at the sudden change of Luhan’s voice so he looked at him and was surprised to see him blushing. “I-It’s—“

“You and Sehun became lovers?” Luhan looked at him with wide eyes and red face. Kai sighed again, lately it’s been his hobby to sighed.

“H-How did you—“ Luhan grabbed a pillow and hid his face there.

“Stop acting like a kid...” Kai said as he go near Luhan and grabbed the pillow he was hugging. “You should act more like an adult since finally after so many years you finally had a lover.” Again, Kai needs to wear his mask to seal his feelings for Luhan. Kai is professional at that kind of game, he mastered it to the level that he can’t believe himself that he can endure that pain.

Luhan pouted. “How can you act so calm when you just heard your best friend had his first lover...”

Kai smiled sadly. “I wonder how...”

“Kai...” Luhan sweetly said making Kai looked at him. “Kai...”

“W-Why—“

Luhan gave Kai his famous smile that made Kai fell for him, way back they were highschool students. “Congratulate me... finally I did something good for myself.”

Kai sighed and smiled with force. “Congratulations, Luhan.” He did it, he said those painful words, what a martyr he can be, if there’s an award for being a martyr, he can be one of those who can receive it. Unfortunately, Kai is stuck at the ‘you are my best friend so I’ll never fall in love with you’ zone. Kai looked at Luhan who is busy hising his red face to his bestfriend and Kai smiled.

~

“If I were him will you love me too?” Kyungsoo looked at his ceiling remembering his wish for the past few months or maybe even a year. Kyungsoo can’t help but to feel down, his childhood friend who slowly drifted away from him now had his lover, whom he believed that it was destiny that brought him. “Destiny my ...” Kyungsoo cursed.

“How’s life?” Kyungsoo saw his bestfriend, Baekhyun and his boyfriend Chanyeol standing at the door. “So bored that you even lie on your living room?” Kyungsoo stand up and went to them.

“Why are you here?” Kyungsoo asked.

“Have you heard the news?” Chanyeol asked.

“News?”

“About Sehun’s lover.” Baekhyun said.

Kyungsoo startled at the news, even though he knew that news ahead he can’t help but to feel sad, knowing Sehun he must be really in love with Luhan, Luhan is really a wonderful person, Kyungsoo can’t be like him, unlike Luhan his is not pure, he had dark side also, he had this extreme possessiveness character, this over jealousy character and this dullness character. That’s the total opposite of Luhan’s character. Kyungsoo sighed comparing himself to Luhan. “I guess I’m really out of his level nor his standards.”

“You know, you are also great Kyungsoo, you are just lacking something.” Baekhyun said.

“You are lacking confidence.” Chanyeol said.

Kyungsoo bow down his head and smiled beneath his hair. “I guess, I’m not really that good.” Then they heard the door opened and they were surprised when Sehun entered the house with plastic bags on his hands.

“You’re already here?” Sehun asked and the two were surprised. “I thought you guys are still at the university, I guess I brought enough for me and Kyungsoo.”

Baekhyun looked at Kyungsoo while Chanyeol smiled awkwardly to Sehun. “You see, Kyungsoo is not really—“

The three of them were surprised when Kyungsoo smiled to them sweetly, Sehun was surprised because he don’t know what is happening while Chanyeol and Baekhyun were surprised because after the discussion they had Kyungsoo can smile like that, how?

“Well, I guess we can have a movie marathon for tonight?” Kyungsoo suggested.

“Yeah.” Sehun said happily because Kyungsoo agreed on using his house.

Kyungsoo became somewhat between numb and helpless, he didn’t imagine that it was like that, that it can be like that, that it was supposed to be like that. He was hurt to the point of getting used to the pain he is experiencing.

~

A week after.

Luhan happily walked out of the room, finding his lover, Sehun outside the room. Luhan immediately went to Sehun and Sehun gladly smiled back to him making Luhan happy. On the other hand, History is the one of the few subjects that Luhan and Kai shared, Kai watched his best friend go to his lover. Kai can’t feel anything but a deep pain in his heart.

“I guess this is the payment for staying besides him.” Kai said, then he walked to the other direction and there he saw someone looking at the same couple making his heart in pain. He saw the boy saw him and immediately fled out but luckily he is fast enough to follow him. “Hey!”

“W-Wh—“

“You... why are you looking at them with pa—“

“Let me go!”

“NO! Answer me first!”

“Let me—“

“Yah! Let him go!” Both Kai and Kyungsoo were surprised at the voice they heard and luckily it’s form someone familiar to Kyungsoo. It was none other than his bestfriend Baekhyun and Chanyeol and someone new. Kai let go of Kyungsoo, while Baekhyun immediately went to him. “Are you okay?”

“Ye—“

“What do you think you are doing, Kai?”

“I’m sorry, hyung...”

“Who is he?” Baekhyun asked.

“Oh, he? He is my brother, Kai... and I’m Suho...” Suho said to Kyungsoo and Kyungsoo returned him with a nod. “I never thought that someone quiet can be Baekhyun’s friend.”

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