December 15th

Ryosuke was standing before his window, watching the snow falling gracefully from the sky down the earth. His smile formed when he noticed that the window glass had been iced over. He blew a breath to the window-glass and made a spot of frozen air on it. He brought up his hand and without much thinking, carved something on the surface. The coldness of the winter pierced through his skin when his forefinger made contact with the glass, but when he read what he had written, there was a feeling that warmed him inside.

When his alarm went off, he was immediately woken up from the serenity. It was the time he had to prepare for his work today. Grabbing his bag, he walked out his bedroom. His writing frozen on the window glass, clearly spelling “Mirai” within a heart frame.

“Ohayou~!”

Trotting down the stairs from the second floor, Ryosuke cheerfully greeted his family.

“Ohayou~!” His mother and his sisters replied with the same tone.

He saw them had been ready to have breakfast. Putting down his bag beside his chair, he settled himself  to sit before asking, “Where is Dad?”

“He has appointment with a butchery, so he left early,” his mother answered while giving him a bowl of rice.

Nodding to himself, he started to follow eating when his sisters bellowed ‘itadakimasu’. As the first bite of the beef melted in his tongue, he couldn’t help but grin in excitement. It was so delicious.

“You look like you’re enjoying the food too much, you know,” he heard Chihiro offering an amused laugh.

His grin grew even wider, “Can’t help, Mom’s cooking is always the best!”

His mother laughed, “Eat as much as you want then.”

“Okay!” he exclaimed happily.

Yet, when he was about to reach for more slice of meat, Mika hit the back of his hand with her chopstick.

“What the—?!” he hissed in pain. “Oi, Mika-chan! What’s that for?”

Mika leisurely took the meat he wanted to her own plate, “The last slice is mine.” She said while sticking her tounge out.

Chihiro shook her head both in annoyance and amusement, “You two, stop acting like kids!”

“She is the kid, I’m not!” he puffed his cheek, brows knotted.

“It’s only a kid who deny to be called as one,” Mika countered.

“But you aren’t denying it either, so you agree to be called a kid,” he smirked in triumph.

Mika frowned and was about to counter, but he instead saw it as the chance to snatch the meat back from her plate.

“Oi, Niichan. You cheat!” Mika protested when realizing her meat was gone.

Munching happily, he didn’t hear any more protest. Mika huffed and took the chicken dish. Soon, their moment of peace returned, and he noticed the smile tucked on Mika’s face.

While only the clanking of their eating utensils was heard, he subtly stole glances at his family. Everyone seemed to be their usual selves, and he was grateful for it made him feel a lot better. He felt it easier to act cheerful when they responded to him casually. It would be hard if they saw him with pity in their eyes. He didn’t like to be pitied. He realized that only until recently.

It was when the breakfast had finished that another conversation was initiated.

“Ano, Ryosuke,” he saw his older sister hesitated.

“What is it, Neechan?” He asked.

“I have contacted the resort, and they said they couldn’t give any reimbursement for the down-payment since we cancel it onesidedly.”

He subtly sighed, mustering a smile and shrugging, “It can’t be helped, ne. So, it’s alright.”

Remembering something, he turned to his mother, “Oh, Mom, you and Dad can still take the plane tickets if you want. Maybe you and Dad can reminisce your old days and have fun in Bali. I only plan to cancel the booking tomorrow.”

“No, thanks. Your father is in his peak season, he wouldn’t want to be separated from his restaurant,” his mother laughed shortly.

“Too bad,” he shrugged his shoulder, grinning. “Well then, I’ll get going.” He stood up putting on his winter coat before shouldering his bag.

“Niichan, can you give me a ride?” Mika suddenly asked.

“Sure,” he replied, gesturing his little sister to get ready soon. Mika quickly climbed the stairs to get her bag.

After kissing his mother’s cheek, he asked Chihiro to tell Mika that he would be waiting outside. Before he completely left the house, though, his older sister called out his name. He turned around and tilted his head slightly, questioning.

Chihiro gave him a wide smile, then exclaimed, “Ganbatte!”

He returned the smile, “I will. Thanks!”

Chihiro’s voice rang back when he approached his car. That encouragement... he knew it had another meaning rather than referring to his job.

He proceeded to his car despite his steps tainted the white blanket of the snow.

**********

“Alright!” Anji-san exclaimed, gaining his attention. They were sitting in a round table, discussing about their coming tour and album.

He looked up to see what JUMP’s manager would do. The other members were also in full focus on the said man.

“Since our main tour will be held in May, it’s decided that we’ll have special concert before the winter end. This special concert is to promote the main tour and your coming album. Now, let’s us discuss what the right time to held it,” Anji-san looked around, his gaze lingered for a few seconds on him before continuing to the other members.

He noticed Yuto and Yuri stole a glance at him before both of them spoke almost at the same time.

“But—“/ “But—“

Yuto laughed shortly before letting Yuri to speak first.

“I suggest to listen to Ryosuke first then we’ll discuss it further.”

He arched a brow when all eyes set on him, but he clearly understood.

“Yeah, you’re right of course,” Anji-san nodded then turned to him. “So, Yamada, you previously informed us that your wedding would be in winter, and the company would give you two weeks off for that. When is the exact date?”

He grinned sheepishly, “Actually, there’s some change. The wedding is postponed till the preparation finish. Probably after the main tour or next year.”

“EH?!”

The reaction was immediate.

Chuckling shortly to lessen the awkwardness and nervousness building in him, he tried to make the conversation back to the main topic, “So, in my opinion, the time for the special concert can be in March. January would be for designing the setlist and goods maybe, and the rehearsal would be in February. That’s a good arrangement, I think.”

Their eyes told him they didn’t buy the reason for his delayed wedding, but they knew better to never meddle with personal business of any of them until it called them to. So, despite he could see many questions flashed in their eyes, they recovered from the surprise soon enough to refocus their attention to the matter on hand.

“Well, I agree with Yama-chan,” Kota responded first.

“Me, too,” Daiki seconded. “It’s the best possible arrangement for us.”

“Any other suggestion?” Anji-san looked around.

As no other suggestion was made, they proceeded to dicuss further about the preparation. He surprised himself by amazingly concentrating on the tour. It seemed that he had managed to put aside his personal problem from his job, and it was not bad.

After the meeting over, Daiki had asked whether they could talk in somewhere else, and then Yuto, Chinen, and Keito wanted to be tagged along. Yet, before he could give them answer, he was called to meet Anji-san instead. Giving his friend a ‘can’t be helped’ shrug, he strode toward a certain office room in the building.

“What do you mean your wedding is postponed?” Anji-san didn’t dillydally as they met. “Shouldn’t it be about next week? We also are arranging a press conference for you to announce your wedding date. Yamada, don’t start anything reckless.”

“I’m sorry,” he sincerely apologized for he knew what problems this would cause. “But Johnny-san has known about it.” Because he told him firstly after telling his family about the decision.

When Anji-san responded with a surprised glare, he quickly added, “I told him two days ago. I just didn’t want to cause you any more trouble, Anji-san, so I directly asked a meeting with him. He said he would be the one informing you and Sugi-san, that’s why.”

Anji-san tapped his forefinger on the table, mulling over, “I indeed have a scheduled meeting with him tonight.”

He didn’t know what to reply for that, so he remained silent.

When eventually Anji-san heaved a sigh, he looked up and saw the angry spark had turned softer.

“What happened?” With a way gentler tone, Anji-san asked. “You quarreled with her?”

“I’m sorry. I don’t want to talk about my private life,” he refused to answer.

Anji-san looked at him for some time before he shrugged, saying, “Fine. However, the other members seemed worried about you. Tell them something. We don’t want anything hold us back for the coming concert and release.”

He nodded, “I understand.”

“And a friendly advice for you,” Anji-san who used to be strict surprisingly gave him a tender smile, “There is something called prewedding jitter. Women usually have it worse than we, men. They may snap quicker, become moody, and the like. Men should understand that, because afterall, it’s them the women that would have a bigger change in their life with the marriage rather than us. Just be more patient, then everything should be alright.”

He smiled back as gratitude, and decided to tell a bit of the story, “Unfortunately, I think it’s more than a jitter. But we’re not in bad term either, so please don’t worry about it, Anji-san.”

“Then, I’m gonna wait for the meeting with Johnny-san,” Anji-san replied. “In this case, surely we will have to work with Shida-san’s agency. I’ll inform you should something need to be done.”

“Alright. Excuse me then,” he bowed and left the room.

When he walked up to the lobby to get Sugi-san drive him home, he was greeted by Daiki, Yuri, Yuto, and Keito instead. He suppressed a sigh. He forgot that he still had to explain to his bandmates.

He encouraged himself before eventually approaching where they were waiting for him.

**********

December 21st

Ryosuke drove in a certain evening, heading toward the city cemetery. He had bought a bouquet of purple orchid which Akira liked. Such expensive flower, he thought Akira had a really good taste. The cemetery was nearly empty. Only a very few people could be seen in the vicinity. He got off his car after carefully adjusted his eyeglasses and his wintercoat.

Walking toward Akira’s grave, he did not expect to see someone already there.

“Hongo,” he muttered the name, and his voice carried by the wind to the young man stood before the grave.

Hongo Kanata turned to his direction, and once their gaze met, Kanata mustered a smile, “It’s been awhile, right, Yamada?”

He answered with his own smile, “Aah. Almost two years if I’m not mistaken.”

When he arrived before Akira’s grave, he squatted down, put the flower, then made a short pray for the deceased little boy.

“It’ll be the fourth anniversary of the foundation in several months,” suddenly Kanata broke the placid atmosphere. “I’ve been thinking to introduce Mirai to public as Akira’s sister. But seems, it should wait longer.”

He stood up to face the taller man, tilting his head a bit before asking, “Have you talked to her?”

Shoving his hands into his pantpockets, Kanata answered, “She called two days ago to inform me that your wedding is postponed until indefinite time, but I already in Tokyo since the beginning of December.”

“Sorry if we’ve jeopardized your agenda,” he sighed, eyes focusing on the thombstone.

“It’s not a big deal, but what trouble me is the reason for the change in your wedding,” Kanata’s tone had turned a bit agitated. “Mirai refused to tell me the reason.”

“I can’t tell you either, sorry,” he replied, catching Kanata unspoken question. “If Mirai doesn’t tell you, then it’s not my right to speak of it.”

He heard Kanata heaved a sigh, before frustratingly asked, “What’