“Minho, wake up! Wake up, wake up, wake up!”

Minho let out a little groan and rolled over on his other side, pulling his blankets over his head. What was this voice trying to pull him out of the good dream he was currently dreaming? It was al nice and warm and fuzzy and they were covered in blankets and dark hair covered his pillow. Laughing words, soft fingers. Everything was nice and held a rare sense of peace he hadn’t felt in the longest time. Why was there a voice trying to pull him out of this?

“SONG MINHO, GET YOUR OUT OF BED!”

Unlike the nagging, the yell literally kicked him out of his dream and he jumped up, looking around the room and trying to make out what was going on. The curtains of his window had been pulled back and soft sunlight filled his little room. Because of the sudden bright light he couldn’t even see who was standing there, holding his blankets and staring intently at him, but he quickly made it out.

“Taehyun? What’s wrong? Why are you yelling? Are you feeling sick?” he mumbled, trying to rub sleep out of his eyes with one hand while the other tried to flatten his hair that no doubt stood out in all directions.  Taehyun. Minho blinked and looked up at the boy, only to quickly look away with a sinking feeling in his stomach. What in the world was he doing thinking these thoughts? Actually, what was he doing dreaming such a dream? The hair on the pillow had just the same shade as brown as Taehyun, and no doubt if he looked at his fingers they would be the same too.  They had been together in his dream, and however wrong he had been taught such things should be, it felt right. He also hadn’t worried about things like being sick or dying, in the dream they had simply been happy and peaceful. Why did such a reality seem so far away and so difficult to realize?

“You said we had to get up early to prepare food!”

The pout on Taehyun’s lips was absolutely adorable, and Minho had to look away. Again. Just because of one dream he was really becoming a hopeless nutcase. Was this how it was going to be from now on? One look, touch, or even simple word from his patient would make him a blabbering fool? He couldn’t let it affect him as much.

“Ah, yeah… I did say that, didn’t I?”

Minho nodded slowly, rather reluctantly pulling away his blankets and standing up. Getting dressed, taking a shower… things he should be doing.  Especially that last one, because standing in front of Taehyun in nothing but a pair of boxers made him painfully self-conscious.  It might be just his imagination, but was Taehyun looking rather shy about it too? And was that a blush he saw on those pale cheeks? He shook his head and quickly walked the few steps over to his closet to find something to put on.

“Go ahead and find the stuff we bought yesterday, and I’ll just jump in the shower and then be out? You can wait that long, can’t you?”

“Hmph! That depends on how long you take to shower!”

The only answer Minho bothered to give was a little grunt as he grabbed some clothes and pushed past Taehyun in direction of the bathroom. Maybe a shower was all he needed to wash away all these thoughts. There was no time to do it either, since he had to (as he had been so kindly reminded of) make food they could bring with them, and then they had to head off to the cherry blossom festival.

But a shower didn’t help. Nor did seeing Taehyun stand by the kitchen counter, brows slanting down as much as ever and wrinkling his nose confusion as he looked down at the food they had prepared the night before. How the heck had this kid survived on his own when he couldn’t clean, couldn’t cook and hardly seemed to know how to open a triangle kimbap from a convenience store. “Need help there, Oliver?”

“Oliver?”

How could someone look even more confused than Taehyun had looked earlier?

“Jamie Oliver. Chef? TV?” Minho threw out a couple of examples and wrinkled his nose too. Was he expecting too much by asking such simple questions? He figured everyone knew this, but maybe it was just knowledge he had acquired after sitting through a lot of TV with his older patients. That seemed more likely. Taehyun at least seemed perfectly clueless and just shrugged his shoulders and looked all the more confused.

“Just… forget it.”

After quickly rolling up his sleeves and washing his hands, Minho started putting out the ingredients in the most practical order. 

“Making this is no magic. I’ll show you once, and then you can try it too? Does that seem okay for you?”

Taehyun didn’t seem all that convinced by Minho’s words, but he nodded nonetheless and rolled up his sleeves as well. Thankfully this wouldn’t be a complete retake of the whole washing machine incident or the changing of bed sheets incident. Both had happened a while ago, and both had made Taehyun so mad Minho had worried he might make himself sick, that he was. ? Really? He furrowed his brows at his own childish thoughts while carefully laying out rice on the sheet of roasted seaweed. Since when was Taehyun a , and since when was he using such a word?

“Spread it out evenly like this, and then take vegetables and meat and put it diagonally like this. Then you roll it up and you’ve got a kimbap. Not too hard, is it?”

His smile didn’t seem quite enough to fully encourage Taehyun, but again the boy just nodded without a word of complaint and clumsily started to repeat what he had seen Minho do earlier. Clumsily might be an understatement, and the tightening of the boy’s lips was a warning signal telling Minho he might just explode soon.

“Look, do it carefully, okay?”

Without even thinking, Minho stepped up behind Taehyun, slipping his arms halfway around him to reach out and help guide the boy’s hands.  They carefully placed the vegetables, just as they rolled it into a not too perfectly shaped kimbap.

“Yaaaah! It looks nothing like yours!”

The complaint was only natural, and Minho had to smile at the predictable response. However he froze when he was no longer looking at the back of Taehyun’s head, but his face.  For the longest five seconds in Minho’s life they were just staring at each other. Both swallowed almost simultaneously, both too nervous to keep looking, but too caught up in the moment to look away. He could feel Taehyun’s hot breath against his skin and something deep, deep inside him made him lean in just a little bit closer.  Who knows what would have happened if Minho’s phone hadn’t chosen that moment to notify an incoming kakaotalk message.

Both men jumped a bit and Taehyun instantly turned back towards the half-finished kimbap. The normally so self-confident air about him seemed to have temporarily disappeared, and Minho could probably say the same thing about himself. The sudden closeness, and realizing that they both were affected by it had made him weak.  Had he temporarily lost his mind? Or had he wishfully imagined things?

“…I think…. I got it…”

Taehyun’s stiff voice broke the silence, and with a simple nod Minho pulled back. The distance made him suddenly feel cold, but his burning cheeks made up for the lack of warmth. This was absolutely not what they should be doing or how he should be feeling. But whenever he tried to think of something else, all he could hear was Seungyoon’s last words when they had parted: “You might be in this too deep”.

Was his friend right? Seungyoon always was the smarter of them, the one who could see things as they really were and the one who could so easily put all his thoughts into words. In comparison, Minho knew that he could act rather stiff and instead of sounding smart and reflected just come off as a bit harsh and stiff. To hell with this, he had just been surprised! Taehyun had been surprised. That was all there was too it. Nothing more. Nothing at all.

“Oh yeah? Good. Let’s make a couple more and then pack them up before we go.”

They continued in silence, but Minho couldn’t help checking on Taehyun every now and then, just as much as he couldn’t help but notice that he was struggling. More than once he almost reached out a hand to help him with, but in the end he didn’t have the guts to do it.

“Minho?”

“Hmm?”

“Did you… feel that just now too?”

“What?”

Minho looked up again, only to find Taehyun looking at him with a thoughtful and almost shy expression on his pale face.  It was rather adorable, and Minho wondered where he got the strength to not reach over and ruffle that always so perfectly styled hair. What was he trying to say?

“Just... for a second I thought that…”

“That what?”

Minho was careful with his replies, not wanting to give either of them much hope. His tone must have scared the boy too, because his cheeks turned bright red and his lips moved, but there came no sound. Taehyun looked away and Minho could see how he took a deep breath as if trying to calm himself. He then turned back, a bright smile on his face and he playfully poked his elbow at Minho’s side.

“You just totally fell for my overflowing charms, didn’t you? Ah, I knew this would happen!”

Taehyun pushed some hair out of his face and winked and Minho, to which Minho could nothing but let out a laughter of relief and roll his eyes. They were back to joking, and it felt good. It felt safe.

“Nam Taehyun, if you get any more full of yourself, your head might blow up.”

“Wouldn’t that be a decent way to go?”

“I’d really rather you not.”

Really. Be it the cancer or a blown up head, whatever way possible, Minho would rather Taehyun lived. But he wasn’t in a position to request that, none of them was. Instead they could only joke about it and act as if it was nothing at all. Like a desperate cry for things being “normal” rather than something out of a romantic drama.

“Oh shut up, Minho.”

“You shut up. Let me finish this and go find the basket and the blankets I got yesterday?”

“What if I want to stay here with you?”

Taehyun cupped his head in his hands and batted his long eyelashes at Minho with the utmost conviction. Did he have to be so utterly ridiculous? Minho rolled his eyes again gave the boy’s forehead a little flick of his finger.

“Do you want us to get to Yeoido by noon, or do you want to stay here all day instead?”

His words still didn’t seem to convince Taehyun, but the boy left the room with a little whine and a scoff of his shoulders. Was he using aegyo, was that it? If so, then it absolutely did not suit him. Even if it was utterly adorable, Minho tried to force himself into believing that he hated it and it was nothing special. He couldn’t let it be special. They couldn’t be anything special. And dangerous as it was, Minho had started to suspect that Taehyun had made that conclusion as well, but was fighting it.