I wish the ride was longer. 

My worries of meeting Jiyong became entangled with new worries. 

Like meeting Youngbae. 

I definitely would feel more comfortable with Youngbae than Jiyong, but I realized that both encounters would be awkward. I placed my orange carrier near the couch on my hotel room. It wasn't as fancy, but the view was nice. The city lights were definitely outshining the moon above. I looked below me and saw the busy highway. I sighed and glanced at the moon. 

Then I went for a warm shower. 

A few minutes later, I opened my laptop to review on the things for tomorrow.

• Meeting with the members
  • Assignments
    • Manager Lee - organizing the whole venue for interview
    • Kihyun - teaser montage; food for everyone
    • Taeyeon - interview questions 
• Meeting with the artists
  • Assignments:
    • Manager Lee - presenting proposed schedule for the whole production
    • Kihyun - securing the reservation of the cafe for three days
    • Taeyeon - advertising poster and video 

I felt my fingers tremble as I typed the next task.

• Meet Jiyong

Then I deleted it.

• Meet

I looked over the interview questions that I prepared for each chapter. This wasn't final, but Seowoo took a look at it so I consider it as one. I could definitely send this through email, instead of having to talk to them but Manager Lee insisted on presenting them personally. I tried thinking of a galactic purpose for having Manager Lee is my manager, but I was too tired to think. 

I turned off my laptop and drifted to sleep. 

The thing about interviews is that they rarely go the way they're supposed to. 

First, I woke up late. I rushed to the shower and didn't even get to enjoy the hot tub. Kihyun was knocking constantly on my room and I couldn't even say something because I felt so embarassed. 

Second, Manager Lee forgot to put gas on the car so we were stuck for around fifteen minutes. 

Third, by the time we arrived, it was almost 10AM. 

I practially ruined the schedule for all of us, even if it was the manager's fault for not having gas. 

I saw Jiyong and Youngbae in the coffee shop, on their casual white-shirt-and-ripped-jeans-thing. They were standing near the counter, talking to what looked like the coffee shop's manager. He seemed familiar, too. But I had no time to reminisce because the three of us were practically running inside. 

The manager was calm. Kihyun was gasping. 

I wasn't calm, but I didn't do anything. The three of us were standing in front of them. 

I was standing in front of Jiyong. I looked directly at.... the clock behind him, and then to Youngbae and the manager. 

"Hello," Manager Lee started. "We apologize for being--"

"No worries. We just came, too," Jiyong interrupted. I didn't look at him. I tried my best not to. 

"Yes, Jiyong woke up late this morning. It's okay that you guys were late, though. It's Jiyong that I can't stand," Youngbae added with a laugh, tapping Kihyun's shoulders as if telling him to relax.

"That's a relief, then. Thank you for understanding. We will do our best to make another good impression," Manager Lee said. "Allow us to introduce ourselves."

What... in the world are you talking about.

"We can talk about that at brunch. Have you eaten?" Youngbae interrupted, but his tone was friendly. 

The three of us looked at each other. As much as I dread eating with Youngbae and Jiyong, my colleagues couldn't deny the fact that we were all starving. "No, we haven't. Brunch sounds nice," I said, looking at Youngbae but also not looking at him. If that makes sense. Youngbae didn't seem to flinch at the eyecontact. Why? Somehow, I felt a pang in my chest. 

He grinned. "You heard them, hyung. Hope you can fix something quick for us." 

"Most of the days, we just stay at home. Really. You'd think we like partying around and meeting people. That used to be the case, but after growing older you'll realize the resting matters more than making random and short connections," Youngbae spoke like an old genius man who was already past his prime. "I doubt there's something fun with our daily routine."

"Documentaries aren't supposed to be fun, they're supposed to be true," Jiyong replied after sipping from a glass of iced tea. Which was weird because he was never the type to drink iced tea. Or maybe I no longer know him, or something. 

So far, things have been civil. No one's been disrespectful, but there has been a lot of awkward stares.. between me and Jiyong's shades. Who knows if that awkward was one-sided. For some reason, I found the idea of him sitting literally in front of me comfortable. But not the staring. 

"What, things couldn't be fun and true at the same time? I'd rather keep to ourselves our daily routine. That way, we'll never be wary of doing those after these documentaries are out."

"I agree with Youngbae at some point, but showing maybe just a tiny bit of your daily routine is not such a bad idea," Manager Lee replied. "In fact, I'd think viewers would prefer to see how you really are in the most normal days."

I thought I was the only one who get to call him Youngbae. But the guy insisted calling him by his real name, because it's a 'documentary.'  I took a glance at Manager Lee who was beside me. I guess he's on some authority level to call Taeyang as Youngbae. Kihyun couldn't calm down though. I was pretty sure he was not focused on the documentary, but on the two guys. Like me. But not on a romantic level. 

It felt like a competition between the three of us. But I couldn't understand what sort of thing are we competing about. Youngbae was friendly. Jiyong was indifferent. And then there was me, who somehow felt offended by these two guys for that. 

I guess I wanted some kind of assurance that I still meant something to the both of them.

That moment, I didn't feel a thing except jealousy over friendliness and indifference.