So, the past week went by in a blur and I’ve been busy. Too busy to continue this journal. Until now. Yes. I’ve been surrounding myself in a world of willing butts, immersing in their soft, soft world, exploring the ups and downs of each different curve, to escape cruel reality. But when all has been said and done, I still want what I can’t get. Or rather, haven’t gotten. It’s only a matter of time, I believe. As long as I don’t give up.

As my Maths teacher once said to my failing Math class, “You can screw up, mess up or even the hell up but don’t you ever, ever give up.” Nine out of ten of us went on to fail our Maths paper but none of us gave up. But that isn’t the point. The point is, giving up ends it all. It’s basically saying I have no chance of ever fulfilling my dreams and ambitions. And that’s not what my life should be about. I want it to be about rising to the occasion. About finding a way to get to the bottom of the problem.

Now, as I pick my cursed notepad back up from where Tiffany last hurled it (Don’t judge me. I’ll bet you haven’t cleaned your room in the past week either.), I am filled with renewed vigour. If there’s a , there’s a way. If resorting to less than honourable scams with less than loyal best friends of Tiffany fails to work, I’ll just have to approach it differently.

But how?

Well of course. If underhand methods won’t work, I’ll just go the above board way. Ironically, I had kind of thought of it from the very beginning, before my plans deviated to the dark side. A proposal. That was what I wanted to do. That’s what I shall do.

I ransack my writing supplies, creating an even bigger mess than before, but I’m too focused on my renewed mission to take any notice. I re-emerge from the pile with a collection of coloured pens and highlighters and sit down to write my proposal.

First. A proposal should state the reasons why the client should agree to it. In this case, why Tiffany should allow me to touch her . A good proposal should present all points clearly. Well, that’s easy. Let’s go with the point-form system.

Why You (Tiffany) Should Let Me Touch Your

1. Your embodies perfection
2. I would like to show my sincere appreciation of such perfection
3. For the better of womankind
4. My rubs are known to be great stress-relievers
5. “I have magic in my hands” – I quote Yoona, the school’s most popular actress, also one of my regular rubbees

I lean back in my chair and admire my handiwork. My proposal looks pretty good so far, if I may say so myself. But it needs more…beef. More…meat. It needs to be utterly convincing, leaving no room for doubt that her life will be better with my hands in it. On it. All over it. Yeah.

What Might Happen If You (Tiffany) Don’t Let Me Touch Your

1. You will never know how magical my hands are
2. Not knowing might leave you with regrets
3. Regrets are bad for the mind
4. You might end up crying in your sleep
5. You might wind up depressed as a result

To be fair, a good proposal will also present the possible side effects or detrimental aspects of partaking in the activity. Right.

The Downside of Letting Me Touch Your

1. There is no such thing

I dust my hands with satisfaction and conclude that section with a nod. Indeed, there can be no negative outcome from it. But something feels amiss. This proposal is definitely convincing but what does it need to make an impact? Ah…visuals. To appeal to the eyes. Pictures. Graphs. Oh yeah, every professional proposal will always have at least a graph or two.

The Levels of Bliss Corresponding to Level of Touch

Perfect. This graph shows it all. Perfectly. And now, in conclusion…

The Advantages of Allowing Me to Touch Your (Tiffany)

1. Too many to list

The Disadvantages of Allowing me to Touch Your (Tiffany)

1. None to speak of

Oh yeah. This is a done deal. I can already feel success at the tip of my fingers. Tiffany’s will no longer be that elusive prized gem, so untouchable. I’m glad I decided to take things into my own hands. Yes. This time, I’ll give it my all.

B