Baekho’s POV

“D-D-Do what you want.”

Click.

I blankly stared at the ground with the phone still pressed up against my ear as I heard the sound of the dead line playing through the speaker after JR had just hung up on me. I slowly brought the phone down and stared at it, not feeling any less different than I had before I had called him. I had asked for permission to chase after Ren and I had gotten it. But why did his words feel double-sided? He told me to do what I want, but the tone in which he said it spoke otherwise. I still felt conflicted over what I wanted to do and what I shouldn’t do. Dammit. I just couldn’t understand him. JR was such a different type of person than what I was used to encountering. I wasn’t imagining things- he definitely felt upset. But maybe it was just the awful timing. Jason had instructed me to tell him the bad news, which I did, but without thinking I asked him that question shortly after like some insensitive bastard. Of course JR was upset about having to take on more work. He was so stressed that he even started crying.

I tightly pursed my lips and stared off to the side in the living room. I had given JR the option of turning both of us in if it all become too much because clearly it was becoming too much for him. But I got the feeling that he wouldn’t do anything. Even despite the damage that Jason constantly dealt him, I didn’t see him turning either of us in. It just didn’t seem to be a part of JR’s personality. But it didn’t change the fact that what we were asking of him was unfair. How could he possibly take on so much work by himself? It didn’t make sense. Asking him to do it was cruel and I felt myself regretting having done it all because Jason had told me so. There had to be another way and I was determined to find it. I called Jason’s phone, not wanting to leave things as they were. Jason picked up after a few rings. Before he even got the chance to speak I immediately cut him off.

“What are the consequences of pushing back a deadline?”

There was a pause on the other end of the line. “Thousands to hundreds of thousands of dollars.” Jason finally replied.

“Aren’t you a millionaire?”

Jason scoffed. “What business is that of yours?”

“That kind of money would be considered pocket change for you, wouldn’t it?” I accused while narrowing my eyes.

“Your point?”

“You’re more concerned about the cost of pennies compared to the cost of your other designer’s well-being.” I laughed, annoyed. “I don’t know why, but that really pisses me off.”

“It’s not just the cost of money, but the cost of credibility. You cannot even begin to comprehend the amount of damage a designer is dealt whenever a deadline is pushed back. Both JA Style and House of Kim will end up looking poorly. We have the venue and the sound, light and equipment team already booked. The styling teams to come in are already scheduled. There’s a lot of behind the scenes extras involved that would have to be re-booked if we were to reschedule.”

“But it’s doable, isn’t it?”

“To call it ‘doable’ would be admitting that I am willing to reschedule, which I am not.” Jason firmly replied.

“Both JA Style and House of Kim can stand fairly well on their own. It’s already in the news that you’re in the hospital. The public would understand if Mr. Kim suddenly pushed the deadline back.”

“What are you implying?” Jason cautiously asked.

“Mr. Kim is slated for a press-conference tomorrow at noon to address his dating scandal. I’m going to make the announcement that we are going to postpone the collaboration fashion show.” I stated, fully prepared to receive an earful from Jason for making decisions on my own. As expected, Jason shrieked.

“You can’t do that- you don’t have any power to-”

“He can’t do it, Jason! What you’re asking of him, it’s simply too much.”

“Did you even try asking him?” Jason angrily asked.

“You think I didn’t? He ing cried, Jason! Asking him to construct three different lines, each with individualized outfits for over a dozen different models by himself is suicide! Even if he did it by himself, I’m sure as hell he wouldn’t make the deadline anyways, so I’m stepping forward. We’re pushing the deadline back by three weeks.” I replied. There was a sudden moment of silence on the other line before Jason finally spoke up.

“Three weeks?” He slowly asked, sounding uncomfortable.

“That’s how long the doctor ordered you to stay, didn’t he?”

“Moron! That’s how long he wanted me to rest! I’m leaving the hospital tomorrow.”

“Then stay. Celebrities do it all of the time. And besides, you’re the king of milking a situation for what it’s worth, aren’t you? You proved that with all of those reporters and guards there at the hospital.” I replied.

“You’re giving me such a headache!” Jason shrieked into the phone. “Fine! Do what you want! Call the meeting, push back the deadline.” He surprisingly agreed. I furrowed my brows in confusion.

“Why the sudden change of heart?”

“I’ve been so caught up and busy lately, I was blindsided about trying to reach that deadline and failed to realize that even if he was working on it alone, it still wouldn’t be met.” He sullenly admitted.

“It’s not because you feel bad towards JR?” I asked.

Jason scoffed. “God, of course not. Don’t be ridiculous.” He was quick to respond. I rolled my eyes. Part of me didn’t want to believe that though. I couldn’t shake the memory of that long awkward pause that happened after I had told him that JR had cried when I delivered the bad news. As much as he hated to admit it, it clearly bugged him. I was starting to believe that Jason didn’t hate JR as much as he pretended do. Why else would he even be here after developing a stress-induced ulcer? His guilty conscious was evidently starting to eat away at him. Judging by the way things were going, Jason would probably be breaking soon. Or at least that’s what I hoped: for Jason to wake up, stop this, apologize, and make amends. But with the amount of damage that he had dealt, I wondered if it was even possible for him to do that. He was simply in too deep and he was only sinking deeper.

“Then it’s settled. Tomorrow at noon.”

  

 

Ren’s POV

“I might be your friend, but above all I am your boss first.” I heard Mr. Kim’s voice from inside of his car. As his surprising words reached my ears I stared at him with wide eyes, not fully believing what I had just heard. Was this a dream, or reality? No, I was definitely awake. If I was awake, then it definitely meant that I must be going crazy. The whole car ride, Mr. Kim venting his feelings of frustration out on me, everything- it was all one big, wild hallucination, wasn’t it? I mean, Mr. Kim didn’t really just say with his very own mouth that he wanted to be friends with me, did he? That can’t be right… can it? I desperately wanted to know more.

“We’re… friends?” I asked for further clarification, not wanting to make a fool out of myself in case I really was just imagining things and misinterpreting his words. My heart began to race. How cool would it be to have the designer of my dreams want to be friends with me? It was completely unbelievable.

“I wouldn’t have told just anyone my secret, would I?” Mr. Kim responded. I suddenly heard the sound of heavenly angels singing in the background.

“This… IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE!” I practically screamed. So much for not making a fool out of myself in front of him, huh? When I realized I must have looked ridiculous I quickly settled down. “I mean, yeah, sure, let’s be friends.” I tried to make it sound as if it was no big deal when in reality this was possibly the biggest thing to ever happen to me besides finally being signed to become a model. Keep it together, Ren. Have some dignity. Don’t squeal, don’t cry. You just need to keep it all in a little bit longer. Your apartment is just right there…

“Ok. Why not?” Mr. Kim tried to humor me. I smiled widely at him as I nodded then waved before turning away and heading towards my building. I climbed up the stairs and unlocked my door. I couldn’t get inside fast enough. Once the door shut and I was inside the safety of my own home and away from all possible eyes and ears, I began wildly jumping up and down through the living room and hallway like a rabbit on too much caffeine. I threw my hands up in the air and started screaming and shrieking in excitement. I just couldn’t believe it. Not too long ago this man was a complete mystery to me and the rest of the world and now he was calling himself my friend… I must have saved a nation in my past life. I seriously didn’t deserve any of this. But even still, I was happy.

I stopped in my bedroom and took a seat on the foot of my bed. A sudden thought occurred to me. Just why did Mr. Kim want to be my friend? Aside from those times I was being chastised from him and being saved by him in front of the reporters tonight, we really hadn’t interacted much. So why…? Maybe he just saw something in me that he really liked. He did say that he was looking forward to working with me. There must have just been something about me that felt comforting to him. After all, he did admit to being unhappy and lonely and honestly I couldn’t blame him after everything he had said to me in confidence inside of the car. Maybe he really was just looking for a friend and kind of just forced his way in here the same way I had done to JR. I pouted as that name suddenly came to mind. I sighed. Ah, stop thinking about it, Ren. He’ll call you when he’s ready. He’s busy now, so don’t disturb him. Just be patient. I grabbed one of my pillows and wrapped my arms and legs around it, hugging it. I wanted to see him now, though…

 

 

The next day around noon I had been called by Jason’s assistant and was told that the models were getting the day off today seeing as his condition seemed to worsen early this morning. The call came right as I was about to step out the door to head for the studio. Worried, I instantly changed my plans and headed straight for the hospital to check on him. When I arrived out front, several reporters who had been standing around turned and started to flash their cameras at me. I found it odd, but I didn’t question it and just kept walking past them and into the lobby. When I approached Jason’s door, his security guards stopped me and refused to let me enter. When I questioned why I wasn’t allowed to be there when I had been yesterday, they informed me that he was resting and wasn’t allowed to accept visitors per the doctor’s request. I couldn’t protest the doctor’s decision. I sourly pursed my lips together and turned right back around, feeling empty handed for having come all this way just to be turned away. As I was entering the lobby, I came to a stop when I spotted Dambi signing papers at the front desk. What was she suddenly doing here? Well, whatever it was for, surely it wasn’t to see Jason. I mentally laughed as I found the thought amusing. I watched as she slightly bowed to the workers after she returned the forms then turned and walked away. I quickly ran after her, calling out to her.

“Noona! Wait!” I called out from behind. Dambi slightly paused then glanced over her left shoulder questioningly before realizing it was me. She pursed her lips together and seemingly forced herself to smile.

“Ren, what are you doing here?” She asked, sounding somewhat down. She looked like she had her thoughts elsewhere at the moment.

“I came to check on Jason but I was turned away. And you?” As I asked this she froze then hesitantly smiled once again.

“Just… getting a check-up, that’s all. A dancer sustains several injuries over the course of their career.” She awkwardly replied in a strange tone of voice. I stared at her. It almost sounded like she was trying to hide something. But what did she possibly have to hide from me?

“Are you leaving?” I asked, changing the subject after sensing that she didn’t want to talk about it anymore. She nodded.

“Yes, I was headed towards my dance studio to clean up the place.”

“Clean? Do you need help?” I offered. I didn’t have any plans for the rest of the day and I didn’t mind helping her if she needed it. Not to mention I’d enjoy being in her company. Dambi seemed to be a free spirit just like me, perhaps one of the many reasons we got along so well. She once again seemed to hesitantly smile at my offer. Did she want to be alone?

“Sure, the more the merrier.” She replied then started up walking once again, not refusing my company. Since she didn’t tell me to leave her alone, I continued to follow her outside to where she had parked her car. She unlocked the doors and invited me to climb inside. Now it was my turn to be the awkward one. Dambi glanced at me from the front seat, giving me a strange look as she saw me slowly open the backseat door. “You know I won’t mind if you sit up here in the front with me.”

“Sorry… I have a phobia of front seats.” I tried to explain without having to go into full detail about the story of my accident once more. It was really something I didn’t like thinking about but yet I seemed to be constantly reminded of lately with all the people to the various places I was traveling to. Dambi nodded in understanding and thankfully didn’t pursue the subject. I climbed inside the backseat and buckled up. About seven minutes later we arrived out front of Dambi’s studio. She walked to the front door and unlocked it, holding it open for me to enter once she had passed. Once we were inside, Dambi walked to the center of the studio in the middle of the dark. I wasn’t sure if she had forgotten to switch the lights on or if it was on purpose. She placed both hands on the side of her hips and started to look around. She seemed lost in deep thought. “Noona… is something bothering you?” I worriedly asked. She glanced over at me.

“I’m just wondering… is it time?” Her voice trailed off.

“Time for what?” I asked, not understanding the conversation she seemed to be having by herself inside of her head. Back at the hospital and even during the entire length of the car ride she seemed to appear upset or troubled. Something was definitely bothering her, but what?

“To wrap this place up.” She replied. I stared at her in shock.

“Are you serious? You want to close this place?”

“Thinking about it.”

“But why? I thought you loved to dance.” I worriedly replied, wondering what would suddenly possess her to do such a thing. I had seen the light in her eyes whenever she was instructing her students. Dancing was her passion. Unless… her checkup at the hospital resulted in something serious? Was Dambi sick? Had she broken a bone or strained a ligament? A million questions raced across my mind.

“It seems… something better has presented itself towards me.” She vaguely responded.

“Something better? What could be a better offer?” I continued to press for further information, relieved that nothing was seriously wrong with her. She smiled then lightly laughed before nodding.

“I hear there’s a new designer in town that’s destined to shake the fashion industry’s foundation. Rumor has it he’s talented enough to make House of Kim’s designs seem like child’s play.” She replied.

“A new fashion designer…? You mean… you might go back to modeling?” I asked, stunned after putting two and two together. Who could this new designer be that suddenly had Dambi reconsidering the choice she made to leave the industry? Just how talented was he really if the talk of the town was that he could beat House of Kim, a company that Mr. Kim had already turned into a fashion powerhouse? As much as the thought intrigued me, I didn’t want to see it actually happen. House of Kim was an inspiration to me. To see someone else just come in and stomp all over it- it would be devastating to witness. I didn’t want to find truth in Dambi’s words, however, it was impossible not to. If she had been approached by this new designer and was actually considering it, it had to be true. Dambi leaned forward and continued to smile at me.

“Should I do it?” She asked me. I stared at her. Although she was smiling, I could tell by the look on her face that she ultimately looked worried. It felt strange hearing a famous ex-supermodel ask me for my opinion. She obviously knew a lot more about the industry than I did. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that it probably wasn’t my opinion she was looking for, but my words of encouragement. She probably needed to hear that she could do it again after being out of the game for such a while. I gave her a comforting smile.

“What do you mean ‘should you’? What’s to ask? If it’s your dream, you should go for it.” I urged her, recalling the puzzling fallout between her and Jason that seemed to end her famous past career. It made me suddenly question Jason’s character again. Judging by the lack of people around him that liked or even cared for him, his actions were questionable. And all I knew from what happened between the two of them, it was enough to make Dambi give up on a dream and start another one. But looking at her now and the way she seemed to longingly look around at her studio in thoughts of abandoning it, I could see she was hesitant. Which made me wonder: what was Dambi’s dream now? Was it modeling, or was it dancing? Dambi leaned back and nervously laughed again.

“I’m kind of old now.” She self-consciously replied, which sounded weird to me. It was true that Dambi was now at the age where most models were forced to retire, but she was still a timeless beauty and had a body most would kill for. It sounded absurd for someone like her to think she wasn’t beautiful just because she was older.

“Once a goddess, always a goddess.” I complimented, catching her off guard and making her grin. She lightly punched me in my left shoulder with her right fist.

“Stop it, you.”

“Noona, do whatever is best for you. If you want to go back to modeling, go for it. If the offer is there, it’s your decision. But don’t do it just because this new designer expressed interest in you. Do it because you want to.”

“He never asked me to do it. I’ve always known deep down that it’s something he’s always wanted but has always been too afraid to. That’s why I volunteered.” She replied, surprising me.

“You volunteered? Then it sounds like you really do want to go back to modeling.” I replied. Dambi slowly shook her head.

“Kind of... He’s a really good old friend though, so I don’t mind going back if it’s for him. But doing so would risk running into familiar, unavoidable faces again…” Her voice was covered in disdain. She must have been referring to Jason.

“Noona… I’m sorry, but can I ask you something personal?” I asked. Dambi blinked then stared at me.

“Ok, sure. What is it?” She curiously asked. I shifted my gaze down to the floor. I wasn’t sure how to ask it.

“Is it… true… what they say about you?”

“It depends. What are they saying?” She lightly asked, thinking that I must be talking about something else. I suddenly realized my question must have sounded stupid. Of course; Dambi was famous. I was certain people had said all kinds of things about her in the past. I hesitantly paused, knowing full and well this would more than likely be a sensitive subject for her to talk or even think about.

“You didn’t really… steal Jason’s sample, did you?” As I asked this, the smile on Dambi’s face slowly dissipated. She slowly turned away from me, almost looking disappointed in me that I had even asked.

“If you really have to ask, it must mean that a part of you thinks I did do it.” Dambi defensively folded her arms across her chest with her back facing me. I could see the stern look on her face through her reflection in the mirror in front of her.

“You didn’t, right?”

Dambi turned around to face me again. “I get it. Jason’s your friend, so you don’t see it yet. But Jason is a bad man, Ren. And it would be for the best if you don’t get too close to him. In your career, you will only get more popular. The more popular you become, the more powerful, and the more powerful, the more he’ll start to view you as a threat.” Dambi shook her head. “And Jason doesn’t do well with threats.”

I froze. “What do you mean…?”

“Take a look around him; do you see any friends?”

“There’s JR…”

“But even JR realized it too: Jason is horrible. The two are no longer on friendly speaking terms.”

“What happened?” I asked. This was all news to me. “Did something happen between the two of them?”

“That’s something between them. But I can sure as tell you from my own experiences: Jason uses people. So be careful if you choose to remain friends with that man.” She refused to explain further about Jason and JR’s fallout. I supposed that if it was something I wanted to know more about, I would have to ask either of them personally because I wouldn’t be getting an answer out of her.

“Jason uses people? Is that what he did to you?” I asked. Dambi remained standing motionless with her arms crossed over her chest. She narrowed her eyes as she thought back.

“It depends on how you look at it. I was the one model he could never get his hands on. Whenever my contract expired, he was always the first in line to inquire about me. But I didn’t like his clothes. Not to mention back then his company was just barely getting famous within Korea. I was someone who had modeled even for all of the famous European fashion powerhouse brands. To sign for Jason, whose company was only famous in China at the time, would have been a career suicide. But Jason persisted and I turned him down each time. All of the rejections must had worn on him that night at the fashion show when he took it upon himself to hide the most valuable piece in his collection amongst my belongings, where it was later found after he had created a loud stir about it with the reporters on site. That little mishap turned out to be bigger than it seemed and it tarnished my reputation. Rather than go into hiding and wait for the buzz to die down, I gracefully stepped down.” Dambi explained.

“Noona, I had…” My voice trailed off as I held my head down and stared at my toes.

“No idea?” She asked.

“…A feeling that… that’s what happened… But I really didn’t want to believe it. But by choosing not to believe it would put you at fault and choosing to believe it would have put Jason at fault. Both of you… You’ve showed me nothing but kindness and even trained me, and Jason… he’s the one that gave me a chance. Believe me when I say that it wasn’t easy to ask you that question.”

“Do you know what your only fault is, Ren?” Dambi asked. I glanced up and stared at her. She sighed. “It’s that you only want to see the good in people. Granted it’s a good trait to have, but it can also be blinding as well.”

“I know…” I sadly replied, shifting my gaze downward again in disappointment. Dambi stepped forward and placed her hands on both sides of my cheeks, forcing me to look at her.

“I’m not asking you to change, dear. I’m just asking you to open your eyes. Be aware of what that man can do to you. He made your career but he can also destroy it.” She said, removing her hands from my face.

“Thank you for the warning, noona. Believe it or not, it’s actually something that’s been crossing my mind a lot lately. Jason’s in the hospital, but he had no one to sign as his legal guardian, let alone any visitors aside from me or Mr. Kim. And then I just recently found out that the relationship between Mr. Kim and Jason might not be all that it looks to be. It turns out Mr. Kim doesn’t like Jason either. And the other models tolerate him, but none really stepped forward and asked about him even when he looked like death.”

“You’re only treated the way you treat other people.” Dambi replied. I gave her an intrigued look.

“That’s what my mom used to tell me too.” I said. Dambi grinned.

“No kidding? Mine too. I’m glad to see there’s something valuable still being taught to today’s younger generation. I was about to lose hope on you guys.”

“You’re only a few years older than me.”

“And don’t you forget it!” She teased. I smiled at her.

“Do you still want me to help you clean?” I offered. Dambi nodded.

“Sure, if you’re still up for it-” Just as she was about to finish her sentence, my phone suddenly rang. She paused and watched me as I dug for it out of my pocket. When we both read the name on the screen we sighed. Dambi placed her right hand on her hip. “Speak of the devil. I’ll take a raincheck on that offer though.”

I nodded. “Sure.” I replied then picked up Jason’s call. “Jason, I was actually at the hospital not too long ago but the guards turned me away. Is everything alright? How are you feeling?” I asked, going about things normally between us. Whatever doubts or suspicions I had about Jason would be kept a secret from him for the time being. The last thing I wanted was for him to suspect me too.

“I’ve seen better days. Listen; about the articles-”

“What articles?” I blinked.

“Are you stupid?”

“Huh?”

“Oh my god, you frustrate me. The articles! About you and Mr. Kim!” He chastised me. I furrowed my brows and turned to Dambi, quietly asking her to look it up on her phone. She nodded then pulled her own phone out and started tapping away and scrolling. When she finally found what Jason must have been referring to, her jaw slightly dropped before showing me the screen. It was an article about me and Mr. Kim secretly dating. My eyes grew wide.

“Oh, god! No, Jason, I swear, there’s nothing-”

“Whether there is or there isn’t, Mr. Kim has assured me that he is taking care of it at a public press conference today, so you can relax. I know how ‘spirited’ you get when something goes wrong and the last thing I need is for you to end up joining me here in the hospital.”

“Oh, um… thank you… for thinking about me… I think?”

“Ugh.” Jason replied then hung up the phone on me. I turned to Dambi who was already on the other side of the room sitting in front of the small TV she had hidden behind the front desk, flipping channels. I walked over and joined her from behind, leering over at the small screen where she had found the press conference Jason had mentioned. Mr. Kim sat behind a table with a microphone placed in front of him with his trademark sunglasses on his face. Several rows of reporters sat at the back of the room, either asking questions or furiously taking notes. It looked like the conference had already been going on for some time before we had tuned in.

“It is true the JA Style designer, Fu Long Fei, or ‘Jason,’ has been in the hospital recently over health related issues. His condition is not well at the moment and under strict orders is being advised to rest.”

“What does that mean for the collaboration between JA Style and House of Kim?” A reporter asked. Mr. Kim glanced her way.

“It is unfortunate to announce that all deadlines and schedules will be pushed back by at least three weeks. A designer’s health comes first before he can deliver his many ideas and clothes to the world. We are both taking full responsibility for this decision but we feel the delay will fully be worth the wait in the long run.”

“Mr. Kim, can you clarify on the status of the dating scandal between you and the rising model Choi Ren?” Another reporter raised her hand to ask. Her question left me feeling quite stunned by the words she chose to describe me. It was strange enough hearing my own name on TV, but to be called ‘rising model’? I secretly felt my heart leap with excitement and pride. I had only had one public appearance on the runway and already I was the catching the fashion industry’s attention. I smiled briefly before quickly letting it fade and returning my attention back to the screen and focusing on Mr. Kim’s answer.

“Choi Ren is a model for JA Style. Naturally, he was at the hospital caring to Jason. As you know, at the moment House of Kim is collaborating with JA Style; it is not unfamiliar for collaborating designers to work together with each other’s models. To put it into simpler words, Jason’s models are my models and mine are his for the time being. The decision of whether or not to associate with them outside of the workplace setting is ours alone to make, regardless of whether or not for personal reasons. In this case, the reports are wrong. Choi Ren is my model and to assert anything else is not only ridiculous, but it is also slanderous. I assure you that both companies will be taking legal measures to prevent the further spread of defamation of character for all parties involved if such notions continue. Thank you. No further questions.” We watched as Mr. Kim stood up from the table and simply walked out of the room amongst a sea of camera flashes going off. I leaned backwards and stood back up straight, pursing my lips in concern.

“Something wrong?” Dambi suddenly asked. I shook my head.

“Nothing.” I wondered… had JR seen the articles? What were his thoughts on this whole mess? Of course none of it was true. Thankfully Mr. Kim came to the rescue and took care of the situation for us or else I wouldn’t have known how to handle it. But if he had seen or read the articles, hopefully JR had also saw the press conference just now. Dambi turned off the TV and sat quietly facing me for a moment before speaking up.

“I’m not one to pry into personal lives, but is there any truth to any of that?” She curiously asked.

“Of course not!” I replied.

“Is it possible that there’s any chance of anything happening between the two of you?” She continued to question me about my relationship with Mr. Kim, which was strictly just friendship. I found it strange. Why was she suddenly asking me this?

“Noona, Mr. Kim is my hero, but I like someone else.”

“JR, I know.” She bluntly stated.

“Noona!” I exclaimed in embarrassment.

“Oh, hush. I figured it out the last time. It’s old news. Stop acting like some shy schoolgirl and man up. If you like someone, just do something about it.” She replied. I recalled the last time I had dropped by and she had basically interrogated me about my feelings towards JR. It was obvious she knew, even if I hadn’t given her an answer the last time.

“But I… did.” I replied. An innocent, yet morbid smirk suddenly spread across her lips as she must have heard something she liked. She grinned.

“And? And?” She continued to press for further details.

“He said it was bad timing and that he’s busy. He told me to wait.” I sullenly replied. Her smile suddenly disappeared and was replaced by a look of annoyance.

“That JR… a real charmer, isn’t he? Well, he is pretty busy these days. It’s not a lie. He doesn’t even want me to bother him- ha! As if I ever really went around bothering anyone! Really! Ah, just don’t take it too personal. JR is slow, but he has a heart of gold. If he asked you to wait for him, then it means he obviously didn’t turn you down. Just stay strong and don’t let these silly rumors about you and Mr. Kim get to your head, got it?!” Dambi tried to cheer me up. It made me wonder if JR had said something to her about what had happened between us before. I suddenly felt hopeful again and smiled.

“I will.”

 

 

After leaving Dambi’s dance studio, instead of going directly home I decided to stay in the city and just explore on my day off. I couldn’t remember the last time I had ever been so free ever since signing to become a model that it felt somewhat strange. But it didn’t bother me though. I loved being constantly busy. It helped to take my mind off of the waiting period. And after spending time and talking to Dambi-noona, I felt a lot happier. She was the only other person that was closest to JR, and if he wasn’t talking to me, he was probably talking to her. Was JR secretly planning something? I started to get my hopes up as I imagined the day he finally accepted my feelings. I smiled as I strolled down the streets of downtown Seoul, minding my own business when suddenly I heard a car pull up beside me and honk, grabbing my attention. I curiously glanced to my right to see who it was and was surprised to see Aron’s car parked beside me in the street. I stared at it with wide eyes, wondering what he could possibly want as I watched him lower the window, revealing Minhyun sitting in the passenger’s seat. Minhyun swung his arm out of the window and leaned outside.

“Get in. You’ve got some explaining to do.” He replied, urging me to climb into the backseat. I remained standing put.

“Explaining?”

“Just get in!” Minhyun screeched, hitting the side of the door and not accepting ‘no’ for an answer. Rather than experience the full force of his rage, I quickly did as I was told. Aron didn’t even wait for me to close the door behind me before taking off down the street again. The first couple of minutes during the ride were spent in silence before Aron finally spoke up.

“So it was Mr. Kim, huh?” Aron sourly asked while keeping his eyes on the road. Minhyun turned around in his seat to face me.

“Did you not learn anything from the examples I set forth? A designer, Ren? Really? And our temporary boss, for that matter!” Minhyun scolded.

“You’ve got it all wrong, there’s nothing between-”

“I knew something was odd when Mr. Kim kept calling you out all of those times. I gotta give it to him, I really was convinced it was work related but wow. Who would have thought Mr. Kim’s acting skills were on point?” Aron angrily murmured as he continued to drive.

“Stop!” I suddenly exclaimed, stomping my foot down on the floor of the car. “If you’re just going to harass me without giving me the chance to explain, I’m getting out!” I declared. Aron suddenly reached forward and locked the door locks, disabling them from all other doors but his.

“Heh, no you’re not.”

“That’s not funny!” I replied. Aron smirked.

“It kind of is.”

“Explain.” Minhyun demanded.

“There’s nothing between us. You can even ask Mr. Kim. Better yet, watch the press conference from earlier. There is nothing going on that is out of the ordinary. I’m not dating anyone.” I replied, defiantly folding my arms across my chest. Minhyun stared at me for several seconds studying me. He pursed his lips together then rolled his eyes.

“Fine. I believe you.” He replied.

“That easily?” I asked, surprised. The two had made such a big deal out of nothing and now they suddenly believed me? Minhyun nodded.

“You would have told us if something was going on between you two.” Minhyun replied. “Wouldn’t you?” He darkly asked, making me gulp.

“Of course! If I was in a relationship, I’d shout it out to the world for everyone to know! It’s been forever since I last dated, let alone anything physical.” I honestly admitted, feeling somewhat pathetic.

“‘Physical’? Dude, just use ‘laid.’ It rolls off the tongue so much easier.” Aron replied.

“You’re really offensive.” I shot back.

“And how long is ‘forever’? We talking years here? God, you must be humping chairs on your free time at this point. Hey, Min, you up for a ? You want some pity ?”

“Like… really offensive.” Although I knew he was joking, I suddenly turned red. Minhyun roughly shoved him, making Aron swerve into the next lane and cutting the car off behind him. A series of angry, hysterical honks followed. I grabbed both sides of my face. This is how I die, isn’t it? Trapped inside a car with these two maniacs. I could have sworn it would have ended differently, perhaps of old age, but no. I would be stuck with these two guys even as a ghost for the rest of eternity. “Guys!”

“You’ll be lucky if you get any pity !” Minhyun shot back.

“Still in the car back here, guys.”

“Don’t give me that. That’s not the attitude you had last night when I had you screaming my name-”

“GUYS!” I practically screamed, desperately tugging on the door handle and trying to get out without any luck. The doors were still locked.

“Don’t you give me that! You know what? No. That’s it. You’re cut off from .” Minhyun replied in annoyance.

“Seriously, you two are still going…” I cried.

“What?! Cut off? What for?” Aron wildly asked.

“For being a moron!” Minhyun shot back.

“That’s not fair! To my credit, I’ve always been a moron!”

“Well now you’re going to start getting punished for it!”

“Oh come on!” Aron loudly whined.

“Please let me out of here…” I cried as they continued on with their way too personal conversation in front of me. I suddenly felt my phone vibrate in my pocket. A few seconds later both Aron and Minhyun’s phones vibrated as well. I checked my phone as Aron pulled off to the side of the road. It was a text message. When I opened it, it was from an unknown number. The message revealed the location of a club and an invitation for a party that one of the other models was throwing tonight in a few hours.

“What the hell is this? A party? I’m down.” Aron asked. Minhyun folded his arms across his chest and sat back defiantly.

“I’m not going.” He protested. Aron raised a brow.

“You’re always down to party.”

“I said I’m not going! Go by yourself!” Minhyun replied, still in a sour mood.

“Fine, I will!” Aron shot back. I slapped my hand over my face.

“Obviously that doesn’t mean you should go.” I hinted. How was it that I knew more about relationships and how they worked more than the guy that was actually in one? Aron glanced back at me.

“Are you going?” He asked, ignoring my last statement. I gave him a surprised look. The thought hadn’t even occurred to me to go. “You probably should. You finally got an invite. They’re finally including you in everything. It means they’re starting to like you.”

“I didn’t think of it like that…” My voice trailed off as I thought about it. “Maybe I should go…”

“Then it’s settled! Ren and I will go and Min, you can stay home! Alright, it’s a party now!” Aron grinned at me. I shot him a confused look as he tilted his head towards Minhyun who had his back turned to the both of us. With his right hand, Aron started silently counting down the seconds until Minhyun would break out of jealousy.

“I’m going!” Minhyun suddenly declared, pouting. Aron smirked then turned back to the wheel. It was almost frightening how well he knew how to work Minhyun. He was probably the only person in the world with that power too.

“Such a woman…” He replied then started the car again. He pulled out into the road and didn’t stop until minutes later when he parked inside of Minhyun’s apartment parking garage. He finally unlocked the doors and I climbed out. When I was about to make my grand escape, Aron grabbed me by my wrist and yanked me forward with him. The two of them dragged me into the building and up to Minhyun’s apartment. Once I was standing inside of his hallway I uncomfortably looked at the both of them.

“You guys have really got to stop dragging me into the middle of everything you do… I didn’t even say I was going. I said ‘maybe’ I should go.”

“Oh, hush. Like you had plans today.” Minhyun retorted, stepping into his living room with Aron following behind him. I remained standing put. Minhyun waved his hand at me, motioning for me to follow him. “Come or else you’ll be stuck wearing your own pitiful wardrobe to the party tonight.” He replied, surprising me. Minhyun actually wanted to lend me his clothes? I thought about what possible brands he might have. I only ever saw him in workout clothes or modeling JA Style’s designs and hardly ever in his own wardrobe. Judging by how intricate his apartment was, I only assumed that he dressed well too. Minhyun was already a famous model, meaning he was well off. He probably owned dozens of designer clothes while I only had a few back at home. I stared at him briefly before sheepishly joining him in the living room. I hated to admit that he was right- I didn’t have any plans other than to go to the party. With JR still busy these days, there was no one for me to bother with my presence anymore. I followed the two of them upstairs. Once inside Minhyun’s bedroom he stopped in front of his large closet and threw open the doors, revealing another large room. The right side of his closet was filled from the ceiling to the floor with clothes while the left was filled with shoes. There was a small designer bench sitting in the middle of the room that Aron immediately shoved me down on before turning his back to me.

“Like we’d let you pick something.” Aron insulted me. I scoffed.

“I have fashion sense too, you know.” I shot back.

“Ooh, Min, what about the silver Gucci one?” Aron asked, obviously ignoring me. Minhyun’s face lit up.

“The sleeveless one? Hmm… not a bad idea. How are his arms?” Minhyun asked, tapping his lips with his index finger. Aron suddenly turned to me, lifting up my arm and rolling up my sleeve. My eyes grew wide as he observed my body.

“Medium-build, it’s perfect for him!” Aron happily exclaimed.

“Guys-” I protested, starting to feel a bit violated.

“This will go well with the Emporio Armani black biker jacket.” Minhyun replied.

“Ooh, what about the destroyed black denim jeans from Chanel?”

“They kicked you to the curb and yet you still support their brand?” Minhyun asked, sounding amused. Aron shrugged.

“They make nice clothes.”

“True…”

“Guys!” I snapped at them, finally grabbing both of their attention. I yanked my arm out of Aron’s hands and held it to my chest defensively. “Am I your doll that you can do whatever you want to?!” I scolded.

“Do you want to borrow these or not?” Minhyun replied, raising a brow. I longingly glanced down at the outfit the two of them had picked out for me. Dammit, Ren. Remember your morals… remember them… but… but it’s Armani…

“Yes…” I sullenly replied. Minhyun smiled with satisfaction, having won.

“After all, my successor is entitled to look as good as me.” Minhyun said as he removed the jacket from its hanger and tossed it to me. It fell down on my lap. I slowly took it in my two hands and held it up in front of me, feeling amazed to actually be holding something so expensive and beautiful and getting the opportunity to wear it. I placed it back down in my lap and smiled at Minhyun.

“And to think what you said to me when you first met me.” I replied, making Minhyun pause. He curiously glanced down at me.

“And what was it that I said?” He asked, obviously not remembering.

“You told me not to stick out. You’ve come a long way from thinking that I could never be Jason’s next Top Model to suddenly wanting me to become one.” I replied, grinning. Minhyun frowned.

“Did I? I don’t remember saying that, but it sounds like something I’d say.” He shrugged. “Perhaps I was just jealous. You were street casted and I didn’t think you’d take modeling seriously enough to last. But you ended up surprising me. Needless to say, I was wrong about you and I realized that. That’s why I lied to you about Mr. Kim’s workshop. I wanted you to stay and take my place… I’ve always wanted to be someone’s mentor.” Minhyun admitted.

“Aww, you could have mentored me!” Aron insisted. Minhyun narrowed his eyes and glared at him.

“Don’t make me get the broom. Get out. Get!” He treated Aron as if he were a cat.

“You love me and you know it.” Aron teased then slowly left the room. Minhyun returned his attention back down to me and I smiled at him.

“Dambi-noona might have taught me a few things, but I’ve admired you since the first time I saw you that night at Jason’s fashion show.” I replied, making Minhyun grow flustered. He awkwardly turned away from me for a few seconds before looking back with a small, satisfied smirk on his lips.

“Good to know.”

“So I’ll listen… to whatever advice it is you have to give me… Except turning me into a doll. Anything but that, ok?” I awkwardly replied. “But I actually like what you and Aron picked out, so I’ll wear it just this once, ok?” I replied, still eyeing the clothes. Minhyun smiled and nodded before handing me the rest of the outfit and leaving the room for me to get changed. As soon as he shut the doors behind him, I stood up and stared down at the outfit laying on the bench in admiration. I glanced back at the closed doors that Minhyun had just exited from and smiled, happy that the two of us were finally close. I felt like I had people watching over my back now, something which I hadn’t had for so long after spending so much time alone. I quickly undressed and redressed into the clothes the two of them had picked out for me. When I stepped out of the walk-in closet, Minhyun had been sitting in front of his vanity mirror and Aron was sitting on the foot of Minhyun’s bed, playing with his phone. They both glanced up at me and smiled.

“Well damn, if that isn’t Ren.” Aron grinned, eyeing me from head to toe. I struck a pose and he cheered, excitedly clapping his hands together. I laughed. Minhyun stood up from his desk and walked up to me.

“They suit you.” He replied before entering his closet behind me and shutting the doors to pick out something for himself. Several minutes later he emerged wearing a dark, draped navy blue top and matching black jeans. He wore several black wristbands on both wrists. He walked over to his vanity mirror and parted his hair on the side, styling his hair up and to the right. Aron was the last to stroll into Minhyun’s closet and emerge wearing a white v-neck shirt with a black leather vest and black jeans. He joined Minhyun at his mirror and combed his hair up to the side as well. While Minhyun started applying black eyeliner to the corners of his lids, Aron waved me over. When I stopped beside him he turned to me and started running his hands filled with product through my hair, styling my bangs to the side. I stared at him with wide eyes. Aron smirked.

“I’m trying to make you look uglier than us.” He joked. I laughed.

“Because it’s you saying it, I can believe it.” I replied and Aron winked at me. Minhyun punched him in the shoulder and he grimaced in pain. I met eyes with Minhyun and we both smiled and laughed. We spent several more minutes getting ready before finally heading out.

 

 

When we arrived at the club later that night, several of the other models were already there and welcomed us. The three of us slipped inside and joined them in one of the booths where we were offered drinks. Both Minhyun and Aron accepted them but I declined, knowing full and well how bad I could become when alcohol was involved. Since Aron was my ride home, I wanted to be at my full senses and alert in case he did something stupid or dangerous again. But the other models hassled me, pressuring me to drink and eventually I gave in. I downed shot after shot and they kept feeding me more. Finally it was Minhyun who had to step in and cut me off, unfortunately at that time most of my mind was gone and I had turned into a giggling fool. My body feeling heavy, I leaned to my right and rested my head on Aron’s left shoulder. Minhyun quietly kept an eye on me.

“It’s getting late. Do you think he’ll come?” One of the other models suddenly asked amidst all of the chatter and music.

“I dunno. I sent the invite but I doubt a scene like this would attract a guy like that.” Another one shrugged. Aron glanced over at them.

“Who’s coming?” He asked. The other model laughed.

“More like who’s not coming.”

“Who’s not coming?” Aron asked again. He smirked at him.

“Mr. Kim.”

“Oh god, don’t say that name around me!” Minhyun hissed. Upon hearing that name I immediately sat up.

“Mr. Kim is a human...! Like me!” I drunkenly replied. All eyes around the table were on me. Embarrassed, Aron patted my head and forced it back down on his shoulder to quiet me. I closed my eyes. Aron spoke up.

“Yeah, I wouldn’t get my hopes up. He doesn’t seem like a guy who enjoys company.” Aron replied.

“Well, we sent the invitation anyways. The last thing we need is to be on the new boss’s bad side, or worse, end up in a dating scandal with him.” One of the other models teased me. My eyes snapped back open and I sat up and glared at him.

“Hey! You would… you would only be so lucky to be caught up in one with him!” I came to Mr. Kim’s defense. The model grinned at me in amusement.

“You consider it lucky? It must be true then.”

“Of course it’s not true!” I shot back then paused. “My head hurts…” Aron suddenly handed me a glass of water and forced me to drink it. The other models laughed at me.

“He didn’t deny it, uh-oh.”

“Don’t tell me you might actually have a thing for Mr. Kim…”

“Oh my god, shut up.” Minhyun scowled, slapping the table with his left hand. “No one has a thing for anyone around here, now stop bringing him up. I’m trying to have a good time around here and you’re ruining it.”

“And would your good time be ruined if I were to suddenly show up?” A familiar voice called out from behind us, followed by Mr. Kim stopping by our table. He was wearing a pair of dark stonewashed jeans with a fitting black 3/4th sleeve shirt that showcased his toned body and a thick silver chain around his neck. His short blonde hair was spiked and his ears were decked out in black jewelry and he wore a silver watch on his left wrist. This was definitely the most casually dressed I had ever seen him as, despite all of his clothes probably being designer brand. “How would your time go then?” He asked, looking directly at Minhyun who remained unfazed. Instead he rolled his eyes at him.

“I wonder.”

“Yeah, me too.” Mr. Kim replied, sounding somewhat irritated. I slammed the now empty glass loudly on the table and stood, almost losing my balance and tumbling over Aron who caught me. I climbed over him to get out from the booth and walked past Mr. Kim without saying a word to him. He turned as soon as I passed him and called out to me. “Where are you off to?”

“I wanna dance.” I bluntly replied without looking back, making my way to the center of the dance floor as they started to play one of my favorite songs. Although I was still intoxicated, my mind was clearer. I stood in the center of the floor and started dancing by myself, swinging to the slow beat of Lady Gaga’s ‘Paparazzi’ with my arms up in the air and my eyes closed. I started rocking my hips from side to side, getting lost in the music and enjoying myself. When I opened my eyes I was surprised to find Mr. Kim standing in front of me, cautiously watching out for me. I smiled at him, still dancing by myself.

“Leather and jeans

Garage glamorous

Not sure what it means

But this photo of us

It don't have a price

Ready for those flashing lights

'Cause you know that baby I-”

 

“Dance!” I urged him only to receive a wild look in return. He shook his head in protest. I smirked then slinked around him.

“I'm your biggest fan

I'll follow you until you love me

Papa-Paparazzi

Baby there's no other superstar

You know that I'll be your

Papa-Paparazzi

 

Promise I'll be kind

But I won't stop until that boy is mine

Baby you'll be famous

Chase you down until you love me

Papa-Paparazzi”

 

I started to dance in circles around him with all eyes in the club on the two of us. Mr. Kim remained standing motionless, following my every movement. The crowd had cleared from around us, giving us the floor. I kept motioning with my hands for Mr. Kim to join me while Aron and Minhyun sat in the background at the table, very obviously waving their arms around for me to cut it out and stop. I ignored them. I didn’t care if he was our ‘boss.’ Mr. Kim deserved to have fun too! And besides, it was just a dance. If he was too shy to dance, then I’d dance for the both of us because I sure wasn’t.

“I'll be your girl backstage at your show

Velvet ropes and guitars

Yeah cause you're my rock star in between the sets

Eyeliner and cigarettes

 

Shadow is burnt, yellow dance and return

My lashes are dry - purple teardrops I cry

It don't have a price

Loving you is Cherry Pie

'Cause you know that baby I

I'm your biggest fan

I'll follow you until you love me

Papa-Paparazzi

Baby there's no other superstar

You know that I'll be your

Papa-Paparazzi

 

Promise I'll be kind

But I won't stop until that boy is mine

Baby you'll be famous

Chase you down until you love me

Papa-paparazzi”

 

I walked backwards and away from him and started to sway to the music on my own when I finally realized that I was 100% alone on this. Mr. Kim wasn’t doing anything but breathing and taking up space at this point. Well, he could do that then. I was still going to enjoy myself. The crowd that had formed around us continued to cheer me on as I enthusiastically danced to the music, possibly doing it even better than Lady Gaga herself. I didn’t care if people were watching me. I was a free spirit, with or without the influence of alcohol (though the alcohol helped). I was who I was and nobody could stop me. I slinked my way over towards Mr. Kim started singing along to the music as I danced in front of him in a last attempt to get him to join me. Meanwhile both Aron and Minhyun sat at the table covering their faces with their hands and trying to look away.

“Real good, We're dancing in the studio

Snap, snap, to that on the radio

Don't stop, for anyone

We're plastic but we still have fun”

 

“Ren, you’re drunk.” Mr. Kim tried to assert after finally having grown tired of my behavior. I circled around him. Although he was wearing those trademark sunglasses of his, I could tell he seemed surprised and even somewhat bothered by my actions.

“I’m not drunk, I’m having fun. Something you should try to do more often!” I replied, still rocking my hips slowly from side to side with my arms out in front of me. Mr. Kim drew closer to me and spoke underneath his breath.

“Are you going to talk to me like this in front of everyone?” He asked in a serious, dark mood. I stopped dancing and pouted. It was clear to me that this wasn’t my ‘friend’ I was speaking to but my ‘boss’ at the moment and it frustrated me.

“You want me to be your friend, but you refuse to accept me how I am?” I asked back, still somewhat buzzed.

“We’re in public.”

“But we’re not on the clock, like you said.”

“Whenever I’m out in public, I’m always on the clock.” Mr. Kim firmly stated. I finally stopped dancing, despite the song not being over and glared at him in disbelief. He had ruined my good mood and there was no fixing it now.

“Then why did you come out?” I huffed in annoyance before angrily leaving him alone on the dance floor. I walked past Minhyun and Aron and marched out of the front entrance of the club building, standing outside alone. I couldn’t believe the nerve of him. We were all out here to have a good time and he was ruining it by trying to remain ‘professional.’ Deep down I knew I was being unreasonable by asking him to break his mold and be fun, but it still bothered me. When, if ever, could Mr. Kim actually ever enjoy himself?

“Let’s talk.” Mr. Kim finally joined me outside a few minutes later. I folded my arms across my chest and turned my back to him.

“I don’t wanna.”

“Ren,” He firmly stated.

“No.”

“Tell me why you’re mad.”

“I don’t know why I’m mad, I’m just mad! It’s not fair. You came out to have fun, but you can’t have fun. The others were talking about you as if it’s a curse to be you.” I muttered, staring out into the nighttime sky.

“It is a curse to be Mr. Kim.” He replied. I turned to face him.

“But why does it have to be? You’re a good enough person- I can sense it. I know you are. I understand it now… why you didn’t want to come out and tell the world about you. You knew this would happen. You knew your freedom would practically be gone. Being a model, all eyes are on me too, but at least the attention ends the moment the show does. But with you… it never ends, does it? No wonder why you never wanted the credit for your work. Being famous… it kinda , doesn’t it?” I bluntly asked, surprising Mr. Kim who paused for a moment before chuckling.

“Yeah, it kinda does.” He smirked back at me before eyeing me up and down. I suddenly grew uncomfortable. “Nice clothes. Are they yours?”

“You caught me. Minhyun was nice enough to lend them to me.”

“You mean there’s a nice side to Minhyun?” Mr. Kim joked.

“Surprisingly.” I joked back. “He is at least to me. And Aron, obviously.”

“They look good on you.” He suddenly complimented, making me pause. Deep inside me I felt my heart start to skip a beat. Calm down, Ren. Don’t read too much into this. It’s probably nothing but a simple compliment.

“Thanks… Um, Mr. Kim?” I asked. He looked at me from underneath his sunglasses with his hands in his jean pockets. “Thanks for clearing everything up today… you know, about that silly scandal that wasn’t really a scandal of ours.”

“You sound almost relieved.” He said in a strange tone of voice that made me pause. Was that… disappointment?

“Well, aren’t you?” I nervously asked. Mr. Kim shrugged.

“I am if you are.” He simply replied, looking away from me and out into the parking lot in front of the club. My heart was racing. What in the world was going on right now in our conversation? Was I looking too much into things again like I always do, or was Mr. Kim being… strange? No, no. You’re drunk, Ren. Go home.

“…Are you trying to tell me that if I was ok with those rumors, that you might of perhaps-”

“Said it was true?” He asked, making me pause again before I slowly nodded. I held my breath while he smiled at me. “Don’t get too excited, Ren. That wild imagination of yours.” He teased me. I breathed a heavy sigh of relief.

“Oh god… I thought… Oh, never mind. You’re right. Crazy, silly me.” I awkwardly replied, trying to laugh it off and feeling somewhat humiliated that I once again seemed to wildly jump to the wrong conclusion about him. Mr. Kim is not hitting on you, Ren. I don’t think your head can get any bigger, so stop embarrassing yourself while you still can… God, I wanted to just crawl inside of a hole and die.

“Do you have a ride home?” He suddenly asked, thankfully changing the subject. I nodded.

“Aron’s my ride.”

“I see. I’ll leave first then.” He replied, surprising me.

“You’re leaving already?” I asked, somewhat bummed to see him go. Mr. Kim seemed to find amusement in my response and smiled.

“I just thought I should drop by since I was invited. I never intended on staying more than a few minutes. I have to get back now. There’s plenty of work to be done. Go back inside. Have fun for the both of us.” He replied, still smiling as he leaned forward and placed his right hand on my left shoulder, startling me. I stared up at him with wide eyes, my heart continuing to race faster as I felt him touch me. For a moment I was confused. Why was I suddenly so nervous? Did I still not entirely view Mr. Kim as a human like myself? Was this feeling because I was star struck, or because of the delusional idea that kept popping up in my head that I was starting to suspect that Mr. Kim might actually ‘like’ me? I awkwardly nodded then watched as he removed his hand and pulled away. He left me for the parking lot, climbed inside of his car and then disappeared down the street. Once he was gone I waved my hand in front of my red face, fanning myself. Oh god, Ren. You’re crazy enough on your own without the alcohol. You really need to stop drinking. I hopelessly sighed then turned back around and stepped back inside the club.

 

 

JR’s POV

I awoke to a numb feeling. I opened my eyes as I turned my head to my left only to find an IV drip sitting beside me, connected to my arm. I winced as my eyes adjusted to the light. The bland white room, the drip… was I at the hospital? How did I end up here? Someone must have found me, but who? And when? I felt my heart start to race. Surely it wasn’t Ren, was it? If Ren had somehow managed to make his way inside of my apartment, it was all over. All of my fabrics, designs, and sewing machinery had been sprawled all throughout the living room. I’d surely be caught before any of this began and he’d more than likely hate me. As these thoughts crossed my mind I glanced over to the right side of the room to find Dambi standing in front of the window with her arms folded across her chest, staring out into the city while lost in thought. Although she seemed to have a troubled, dark look across her face, I suddenly felt relieved to know that she had been the one to find me. I felt stupid; of course it would be her. She was the one that I had personally asked to check in on me on a daily basis, which she kept to her word that she would do. But how long had she been standing there, and how long had I been out? I started to sit up in the bed. When she heard my signs of movement, she turned her head to her right and glanced over at me. She tightly pursed her lips together before turning the rest of her body to face me.

“Noona…” My voice trailed off as I suddenly felt dizzy. I abandoned my plan to sit up and laid back into the pillows behind me. I felt strange. My body felt weak and frail but yet significantly better than how I had been feeling the day before.

“Do you understand how scared I was?” She darkly asked me. “After calling your phone repeatedly without any response, you gave me no choice but to go down to your place and ask the landlord to let me in. When I found you, you had collapsed inside of the kitchen.” So that’s how it had happened. I couldn’t help but notice the pain that was evident in her voice. Her eyes looked red as if she had been crying. Had it been over me…? Because I had scared her that much? I suddenly felt terrible. It had never been my intention to scare her or make her cry. She was one of the last people I ever intended to hurt.

“I’m sorry…” I rose my right arm and brought it over my forehead. I couldn’t think clearly at the moment.

“I told you to take it easy! I told you to call me if you needed help!” She chastised me. “Do you think I enjoy watching you, who I consider a younger brother, work himself to death?”

“I’m not dead… Noona, please, calm down…” I desperately tried to make her pain and fear go away. I hated seeing her like this.

“But you were close to it when I found you.” Dambi shook her head. “No, this isn’t going to do. I’m not going to do it. I’m not going to watch you slowly kill yourself. I’m going to help you.”

“Noona, please-” I started to protest when she suddenly walked up to my right and took my hand in hers as she knelt over the bedframe.

“I’ll do it… if you ask me to.” She replied with a trembling voice while holding her head down so that she wouldn’t have to look at me. There was a long period of silence as she struggled to find her words. I stared at her, waiting for her to clarify what she meant. What did she want for me to ask her to do? And why was it difficult for her to suddenly say? I froze when it occurred to me. At that moment she finally glanced up at me with a serious look on her face. “I’ll go back to modeling.”

“What…?” I asked in disbelief as the weight of her words hit me like a brick to the face.

“You don’t have to do this all alone. And I know it’ll help relieve some of the pressure off of your shoulders if I were to represent your company.” She spoke with great difficulty, her voice trembling. Although she sounded sure of herself that she wanted to help me, she also sounded afraid, and it didn’t take much to see why. When the rumor about her being a model that stole other designer’s belongings surfaced, several harsh articles and comments had been written about her. I remembered consoling, or trying to console her during that time and telling her to stay off of the internet because it had turned her into a wreck. Her whole life had seemingly turned upside down over the actions of another. For a week she had locked herself up inside of her apartment where she simply laid in bed and cried. I visited her to make sure she ate. But unlike me, Dambi was strong. She only allowed herself that week to cry before forcing herself to move on. Before I knew it, she had quit the industry and started her own dance studio. Although she credited Jason for ruining her career, she never forced me to stop being friends with him. She warned me about him several times and even kept a close watch out for me, but didn’t tell me to cut off ties with him because she knew that we helped each other’s companies whenever we needed it. And besides, Jason had personally helped me hide the ‘Mr. Kim’ side of me behind the fake ‘reporter’ side. Although she didn’t trust him, she didn’t hold me back from making my own decisions or mistakes in life; she simply guided me through them all of this time. And now she was willing to go back to that dark time, all because of me.

“Noona… I can’t… I can’t ask you to do that…” I guiltily replied. I felt like it was my fault, like I was forcing her to return to something she hated all because I couldn’t get my act together and do everything like how everyone expected of me. It was my fault for not pushing Jason away earlier after watching him rip Dambi’s life apart. Part of me had been in denial about him framing her. He had always been nice to me, up until this point. The other part of me didn’t want to be lonely either. Jason and Dambi had been the only friends of mine up until Ren came into my life. All of this time I had been forcing myself to be blind to who Jason really was at the expense of my friendship with Dambi. I didn’t want to imagine how she must have felt watching me continue to be friends with a snake like him and it only made me feel that much guiltier just now thinking about it. I had wronged Dambi all of this time. How could I ask her to go back for my sake?

“For god’s sakes, JR! Let me help you!”

“I can’t.” I outright refused. Dambi suddenly released my hand and slammed her own two down on the railing of the bed after growing frustrated with me.

“Why not?!”

“…Noona, you’re my friend above all else and a model last. How could I take advantage of our friendship and use you for my own benefit? I’d be just like him then… I’d be just like Jason. I can’t do that.” I refused to be someone like him. I’d rather die.

“Idiot!” Dambi scolded. “You’re right; I’m your friend! Use me! That’s what friends are for, aren’t they? To help each other to the best of their abilities whenever they need it! JR, just say the word and I’ll-”

“What about your dance studio? What about your students? Are you really willing to throw away your happiness for me?” I slowly shook my head from side to side. I knew how much they both meant to her. I couldn’t bear to take that away from her. “I can’t ask you to do that for me. I’m grateful… that you care enough about my happiness. But I care about yours too. After what Jason did to you, I could never hurt you by asking you to return to that. Noona, your friendship is too precious to me. You’ve always been around to save the day, and this time was no different. I need you in my life. But to work for me-”

“Enough.” She replied, cutting me off. I stared at her and she reached for my hand again. “You’re right. I would have to give up my dance studio. But it’s just one studio. And I can always start a million more later on down the road. You want to know why? Because when one door closes, another one opens. Do you really think I wanted to close that door all those years ago in the first place? Of course not. I loved modeling, JR. It was my life. Closing that door was one of the hardest things I had to do. And going back will be another. But if you’re going to ask me to sit back and watch the person who destroyed my career try to do the same to you, I won’t do it. At least not if I have the power to help you stop it. I want to help you. Let’s take it all back from Jason together.”

“Noona…” My voice trailed off, touched. Tears started to flood the corners of my eyes. After being betrayed by Jason, it felt like I had lost a bit more faith in humanity. Jason, who I had considered an extremely good friend had managed to hurt me deeply and I felt like it was impossible for people to perform selfless acts and only selfish ones. But once again Dambi proved me wrong, just as she had with the headphones several years ago back when we first met.

“Create the fiercest designs of your entire career and I promise you I will light that runway on fire for you.” She smiled through teary eyes. I smiled back at her through the same.

“I would love nothing more than to have the beautiful supermodel Son Dambi represent my clothes.” I finally admitted to her for the first time. “But it was never something I could ask…”

“If I say I’ll do it, will that be enough? That way you don’t have to ask.” She replied. I stared at her with wide eyes before sheepishly shifting my gaze to the side. Dambi really did know me too well. She especially knew how to approach sensitive topics with me, knowing all too well that I was too self-conscious to ask for things like help from others. And truthfully, I was grateful to have a friend like her. Dambi playfully nudged my arm. “You’re so sensitive.”

“Thank you, noona… for doing this for me. I’m happy…” My voice trailed off as I paused to think. “But I’m so tired and so worried… about what the future has in store for me.”

“Hmm?” Dambi sat down on the chair beside my bed and tilted her head to the side. “What are you talking about?”

“I’m scared that all of this hard work might amount to nothing in the end… and nothing will go my way.” I relayed to her one of the dark thoughts that had been plaguing my mind lately while I slaved away in front of my sewing machine. I was terrified to think that Ren might reject me when he found out who I really was. And then there was still the issue with Baekho, who I feared he might really go to after growing impatient with waiting for me.

“And what’s that? What won’t go your way?” She paused. “Is it Ren?” Dambi asked. Now it was my turn to pause.

“Yeah.” I hesitantly replied.

“You want to protect him?” She asked. I slowly nodded and remained silent. She stared at me, studying me. “Is that all?”

“Yeah.” I shifted my gaze down into my lap, still beating around the bush.

Dambi scoffed. “’Just friends’ my . Something is definitely going on between you two. I’m a woman; I can sense these things.”

“You can?” I dumbly asked as if being a woman was some sort of super power. Dambi quietly stared at me for a moment before softly smiling and nodding.

“You like Ren, don’t you?” She asked. I instantly turned my head away from her so she wouldn’t see the bright shade of red my face had become at the mention of those few words. I heard her softly chuckle. “Fine, don’t tell me. But at least be honest about your feelings with yourself, if not me. Personally, I think the two of you would be cute.”

I paused then slowly glanced back at her. “You… you think?” I asked and watched as her face lit up and she smiled again. Judging by the knowing look on Dambi’s face, it suddenly became clear how painfully obvious my true feelings for Ren were. If she didn’t know then, she must have known now. I nervously looked away.

“You want to know what I think?” She asked. I slowly nodded, still facing away from her. “I think he likes you too.”

“Noona, you’re really embarrassing me now.” I replied, turning red all over now. Dambi grinned then shrugged as she sat back and away from the side of the bed.

“You must take me for some sort of nun at a Catholic convent. I’m a woman! I have plenty of experience! And I know the look of love when I see it. I think you two are just too scared of what the other one might think to actually do something about it. Life’s about taking chances; if you don’t get hurt, you’re not fully living it.” Dambi said, suddenly standing and clapping the imaginary dust from her hands. “Anyways, that’s my one good deed for today. I’m going to get going now. I have a lot of thinking and preparation to do. I’ll see you later, squirt.”

“I’ll see you later, noona. Once again, thank you. Oh, and if it’s not too much to ask, please don’t let Ren know I’m in here. I don’t… want him to worry about me.” I replied. She smiled, nodded and waved before finally leaving the room. Once she was gone, I thought back to her last words. What had she meant by ‘look of love’? And who had she seen it from? Me, or Ren? I wasn’t sure. I’d have to remind myself to ask her about it later. I tiredly laid my head back down on the pillows and closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep.

 

 

I was released from the hospital around 8 PM the same day. After being allowed to leave, I went straight home. I weaved my way through all of the previous mess I had left in the living room, making my way into the kitchen to get a bottle of water. When I opened my refrigerator, I paused when I suddenly found it full of containers filled with food. I smiled as I thought of Dambi, who must have cooked all of this back at home and brought it back here while I was still in the hospital. I closed the door after grabbing a bottle then turned around, leaning against the counter as I took the TV remote and turned it on in the other room. The news was on. The image of Baekho sitting behind a table in a suit at a press conference was being displayed. I bit my bottom lip then exited the kitchen while still holding the water bottle in my left hand. I weaved my way through my mess again and sat down on the couch to get a better view and listen. The coverage was old news from earlier in the day where Baekho had made a surprising announcement to push back the collaboration deadline by three weeks. I stared at the TV with wide eyes. Was this true?

I reached for my phone in my pocket and turned it on. I found a string of several missed text messages from Jason who had explained to me that he agreed and gave Baekho permission to push back the deadline and to forget about what they had asked earlier. In his messages he was brief, blunt, and rude. However, I hardly took any notice of this. I felt far too relieved to take offense to any of his wording. I didn’t have to cover for him after all and this meant I had more time to get everything done for both House of Kim and my new company. It felt as if a huge burden had just been taken off my shoulders. I glanced back at the TV to see that Baekho was still on, only now he was discussing a supposed dating scandal with… Ren? I furrowed my brows as I suddenly recalled him mentioning ‘articles’ in our last conversation. As I was about to run a search on my phone for these supposed articles, I heard Baekho flat out refuse and threaten to sue over these rumors, making me stop in my tracks. He denied any involvement with Ren…? But… hadn’t he asked me for permission the other day?

I turned the TV off and stared down into my lap. What was going on here? Did Baekho… change his mind? Did he still feel like he couldn’t pursue Ren knowing that there was something between us that he didn’t want to get in the middle of? I wasn’t sure… The same way I wasn’t sure if I wanted to read any of those articles about their supposed ‘dating scandal.’ But if he said it wasn’t true, even when he seemed to want it to be the opposite based off of our last phone call, then it couldn’t be, could it? If he was really serious about wanting to chase Ren, he wouldn’t have denied the rumors at the press conference. He would have said they were true. I didn’t know why, but I suddenly felt a little… relieved. If Baekho really wasn’t going to go after Ren like he said he would, I felt like I actually still stood a chance. And with this sudden news of being granted more time, I could relax a little bit more now. Maybe with this bit of extra free time I could even talk to Ren… At the moment there was nothing more that I wanted than to talk to Ren and hear his encouraging voice after all the stress I had just been through. Hearing his voice always managed to cheer me up and make me forget my troubles. It felt like it had been an eternity since I had last heard it. I placed my water bottle down on the table in front of the couch then wrapped both hands around my phone while I stared down at it, trying to gather the courage to call him. Sudden deep, troubling thoughts came to surface. But what if he didn’t want to talk to me? What if Ren really had moved on? Those articles had to have come from somewhere… No, he said he would wait for my call…  He wouldn’t… By now I was severely second-guessing all of my previous thoughts. No, don’t think. Just do it. Call him.

I swallowed my courage and dialed Ren’s number. The phone rang several times…

No response.

I blankly stared across the room, feeling somewhat empty and hurt. In the past, it hadn’t been many times, but whenever I had called him, Ren usually picked up on the first ring or the second. He was always unnaturally quick and eager to take my calls… but what had changed? I forced a sad smile on my lips and hung up the phone as I was being prompted to Ren’s voicemail. Ah… that’s right… there’s Baekho. My chest tightened with the pain of feeling insignificant and small. Because I was still tired from earlier, I didn’t even have the energy to be optimistic and think that maybe Ren was just busy. My thoughts just automatically went straight to Baekho, the one man I knew might have the power to take Ren away from me. I slowly put the phone away beside me on the couch and held my head down low.

I’m losing, aren’t I?