~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~{ Junjin & Hyesung }~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Junjin and Hyesung, they share a geeky sense of humor, they comfort each other and hold on to each other when one is in need. The fans don't call them "mama bird and baby bird" for nothing, you know. Everyone who'll take a quick look at them would say that they are BFFs. 
But, if you look closer, you'd see what I see. You'd see a strong unfortunate friendship. You'd see a whole-heartedly devoted friend. And you'd see that he is suffering from a broken-heart. 

It was about 5 years ago, 1998, the middle of the hot summer. We were still rookies, and it was at the time Hyesung was still very shy and timid. He used to change his clothes separately in a small room that was separated with a thin door from our training room. And I remember, I remember the day I noticed little Jinnie taking a glimpse at his hyung when he didn't close the door all the way through. I saw the way his gaze changed, the way his cheeks turned to a darker shade of red. It was hot and we were training so no one but me saw anything that was slightly off. Hyesung didn't knew about Jin-ah's glimpses. It happened more than once, but he never noticed, and I never told him about it. I didn't want to go and talk to Jinnie too. I didn't want to jump into conclusions, it could've been just a big misunderstanding; or, I could've been right on the spot, and mess my little dongsaeng up. If I go up to him questioning if his gay, he'd panic and close within himself trying to deny it, even to himself. It's not a thing you go up and ask, I should give him his time, till he feels comfortable and sure enough to talk about it with me, or anyone else to that matter. 

I tried my best being there for him, and only later that year Jin-ah came up to me confessing he think he might be gay. He cried to me that night, and I held him quietly, soothing him with it's ok, you did nothing wrong, we love you as you are Jinnie, it's ok, everything will be ok.... He came up to me after being too fed up in his emotions. He was in love, and he knew it. I never told him that I noticed his love for Hyesung long ago; I didn't want to make him paranoid​, panicking over the thought that Hyesung or the others noticed that about him. 

Ever since that day I was having a devastated Jinnie crying at my living room about once or twice a year (usually the night before his birthday, or some time around valentine's day), drinking his soul out, mumbling about whatever and sharing his dark fantasies (which I try till this day to forget). 'I guess, he trusts me...', I thought to myself with a warm smile at the day he knocked at my door. I realized, he came to me to put an eye on him so he won't drink too much or do something to himself, and so - I did (took the bottles out of his hands and put him to bed, shushing his bad thoughts and feelings). The other members would probably never believe me if I would have told them that our strong and smiley Junjin broke down in tears in front of me, not that I'll ever tell them that.

For 5 years I tried to talk to him to confess, and at the age Jin-ah was 23, in his 23th birthday party, being the strong man he grow up to be, he confessed his love to Hyesung. It was astounding, unexpected. I was proud of him, and worried, of course, but mostly, I was happy for him that he manage to grow up the courage to confess. It was in a later part of the birthday party were just us Shinhwa members were still partying at Junjin's house. I noticed his weird acting, that was weirder than usual, but said nothing about it. When I saw him becoming a bit weirder than the mess he was before, I came up to him and asked quietly, without the members noticing us, if there's anything wrong. He just shrugged his shoulders and told me that he hope there won't be and got back to the others siting on the couch laughing at Eric who dressed in a dog costume. 

It was near midnight, and Hyesung, being the great friend he is, was lighting up the 23 candles on the birthday cake he especially made for his best friend. I could see the loving look in Jinnie's eyes, it was heartbreaking to look at, yet heartwarming and beautiful. We were all a bit drunk, some more than others, and as the time was coming closer, we started the counting down together, as one. 10! - 9! - 8! - 7! - 6! - 5! - 4! - 3! - 2! - 1! HAPPY BIRTHDAY PARK CHOONG JAE!, we were clapping our hands, throwing confetti in the air and shouting our cheers as Junjin was blowing on the candles, putting them out all together with one strong blow. Hyesung was smiling, gazing at Jin-ah softly. 

Junjin then grabbed Hyesung hand and leaded him to the balcony outside. I knew what he was planning on doing, and so I distracted the members' attention, giving Jinnie the time he needs.

Hyesung was a bit dumbstruck as he followed his best friend. He was laughing lightly, but a silence took over as they got to the balcony. Hyesung tried to make an eye contact with Junjin, but Junjin seemed to be troubled​ by something he couldn't figure out. 

Jin-ah?... Jin-ah what's wrong..?, he asked, but no answer. 

Junjin, is everything's alright?..., he asked his friend again, now slightly worried.

I'm going to figure it out actually, Jin answered hesitantly, finally making some eye contact with him. Hyesunggie, do you know what did I wished for?

..hah?.., Hyesung seemed to be a bit perplexed​. After another moment of silence​ Hyesung understood Junjin is waiting for him to answer, and that he's going to wait till he'll give him one. eh...money?~.., Hyesung didn't really know what to answer him as he was too distracted​ at Jin's hand that was still holding on to his and so he just throw one (answer) in the air. 

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