And on that time....
once again....I fall in love with him
As he think that I am important enough to him
that he needs my number to contact me

Please god, please let time stop at this moment
because his action just make me
fall too hard with him.

*                                                                                                     *                                                                                            *

I love him
When I dreamt about him last night
The dream, still vivid in my mind,
and my heart....

I love him
When I met him at a gathering among our friends
As usual he looks dashing and handsome
It makes my eyes stop on him
And just him

He walked toward me, with his cute and giddy smile,
In instant, I also smile at him......
One bright smile of mine.

He took my hand and placed it in his,
My heart fluttering with every moves he did toward me,
He hold it tight, like he don't wanna let go of my hand,
EVER.

He led me to the garden,
No words come from our lips,
Just our eyes talking to each other,
It seems like both of us know that we love each other,
Very very much.

I love him
When he kissed my hand and placed it on his chest
He looked at me and said,

"I need to go Hyunhee, I love spending time with you,"

"Please Baekhyun, don't leave me. I wanna spend more time with you,"

Without waiting any time, I hugged him
From his back
I hugged his back that I love so much,
Like what I imagine, it is indeed very warm and reliable
 

We stay like that for as much as I long for him
We stay like that for as much as I love him
We stay like that for as much as I want him
And we stay like that for as much as I need him

I love him
When I woke up from my sleep this morning
The dreamt, it warms my heart until I cannot control the beats of my heart
It feels so real that I hope I will never woke up
And stay like that for the rest of my life

But I know, 
Something like that will never be real
It only happens in my dream.

I love him,
Eventhough I can only feel his love toward me
Through dreaming

I love him
When he teaches me how to play 'Happy Birthday' song on the piano
The way he calls my name
and the way he touches my hand while teaching me
Make me want to hold his hand again
Like I felt in my dream.

Will it feels warm like I dream before,
Or will it feels cold because I'm nervous,
Or will I feel the spark, like any other couples,
When they hold each other hands?
Which one of this will I feel when I hold his hand? 

I miss him
When he said he needs to go
to meet his girl and asks Chanyeol to teach me
In return, he will do any favors for me
in the future.

I miss him
When I see his reliable back turns away from me
And walks to meet his love
If only I own him
I'm sure he will also walks at me as happy as he is now
This feelings, make me wanna cry...
HARD.

Because I know,
From the beginning,
He will Never Ever be Mine.

Chanyeol walks toward me 
And looked straight into my eyes

"You should confess to him, if you don't want him to walk away like that,"

Chanyeol please, don't hurt me like this
Just let me deal with my heart on my own
No one should cares about me.

I shook my head
And ask him to continue Baekhyun's lesson just now
With my smiling face.

Chanyeol still urges me to confess my feelings, and I looked at him.

"Chanyeol please, he will never accept me....
and no other guys will accept me,
So, let's continue this lesson okay,"

"Anyone will accept you Hyunhee,
you are kind, friendly, cute, and hardworking.
You are not ugly like what you claimed yourself before....
you are a sweet girl,"

"Is it true, Chanyeol?"

"Of course, I never lie,"

"If you said so, I will reveal this secret to you,"

Chanyeol looks at me with curious eyes.

"Actually, since our last picnic...
I fall in love with you. I fall in love with the caring side of yours,
because I never thought that someone will care about me like you care about me.
So Chanyeol, will you be my boyfriend?"

I look him straight into his eyes.
He looks at me with his shock eyes.
He becomes clueless and speechless.

Slowly, his legs slowly moves backward...

"I........I.........
Hyunhee, are you serious???"

I just nods my head......

"Hyunhee....I......I......cannot......accept......."

"See Chanyeol, even the only guy that compliments me cannot accept me.
Even you cannot accept my feeling Chanyeol.
You said any guys will accept me, but in reality no one will ever accept me,
not you, not Baekhyun, not anyone,"

After I said those words,
All kind of feelings slowly crept inside my body...
and gathers inside my heart....
While I keep chanting in a low voice....

I love him
I love him
I love him
I love him
I love him

I love him hard
I want him
I need him
I want him to notice me
I need him to hug and accept me

But the moment I see him with his girl
On the bleacher, kissing each other.

It hits me....
HARD, on my heart.

He will never love me,
He will never want me,
He will never notice me,
He will never hug and accept.....
This love of mine.....
 

Because he already got other love, 
that cannot be compared with mine,
Because it is greater....

*Hello everyone.....well suddenly I feel like wanna write something here 
After months and years hehehehhee
Just because recently, I feel like I fall too hard with Baekhyun kekekeke*