you placed the last kimbab that you made in the food container and smiled contently. you look at the clock and gasped. “ im late omg” you said to yourself, feeling panic. you put the food container into a bag and quickly dress up. you were going to meet jimin and s at their usual hangout place. yes, you always go to their hangout place with the food you made because they love your cooking and also they’re always hungry  of course. you wore simple today, white t-shirt and jeans with converse shoes. well, that’s what jimin likes. he once told you that his ideal type is a person who wore simple yet still looks beautiful.

  "~~~~~ah! yes thank goodness for bringing food for us! that’s why we love you!“ taehyung ran to you and takes the food. the other members welcomes you and hollered for you to sit beside jimin. you were smiling at how happy they are that you’re here but your face slightly change when you look at jimin. he was staring at you with hard eyes that looks like he’s irritated.

**did he not like my presence here or is it just me.. but it's alright to come here right..? im his girlfriend after all** you thought. you snapped back to reality when namjoon told you to come over and sit beside jimin once again. you tore your gaze from jimin and looks down while walking towards his direction. you were sitting a bit far from him cause you can sense that he is still staring intensely at you. 

the whole time you’re here were like hell to you. the boys were noisy and chirpy as usual but the thing that makes you feel awkward and uncomfortable is your boyfriend. jimin has not spoken to you and neither to the boys. he was just watching the tv with a bored expression and you feel hurt by it. you couldn’t take it anymore and get up from the sofa. the boys stopped talking and looks at you confused together with jimin. "urm i have to go.. i forget to complete a school assignment” you bow and walks away quickly. jimin squints his eyes and gets up too. “im going to send her” he said and chases after you.

 **if you didn't like me to be there you should’ve told me. i’ve wasted my time to make kimbabs for you and you're being this way** you sighed. suddenly, you felt a hand grabbing your arm and turns you around. you frowned but eases your forehead lines. “are you okay? do you really have to go?” he asked. “y-yea im okay. and yes i have to” you lied and looks away. 

he lets go of your arm and puts his hand into his pocket. he nodded and walks away. you look at his back with your heart breaking into pieces. he should’ve double-checked you or maybe walk you home. but no, he just… walks away. you know you shouldn’t feel sensitive over it but this situation has been going on for a long time. 

 you’ve been dating jimin for a year. you still remember the day you confessed to him. yes, you confessed and not him since you’ve been having a crush on him for three years and your dream came true when he accepts. in the beginning he’s sweet towards you, going to school with you, sending you back home, having dates frequently, saying sweet words but after a long time.. he doesn’t really show his affections and becomes emotionless only towards you.

 he rarely talks to you, replies you with only a word or few, saying that he’s busy when you want to go out with him. he’s ok talking to his friends, other classmates, but not you. you didn’t know your mistake or who’s fault that he became that way. Its like he’s doing a dare or a one-sided love. sometimes you regret confessing to him, but you’re glad that he’s yours now and you can shower your love towards him. the next day, you were walking along the school hallway alone while looking down. you weren’t in your mood due to yesterday and jimin didn’t pick you up as usual. 

you look up and frown. jimin was walking with another girl, smiling and laughing at each other’s jokes. you seem fine with that but it hurts you when he saw you but walks past you, not giving a smile or a good morning greeting. your tears were threatening to fall but you force yourself not to let it out. you’ve been trying to get use to it actually since jimin has been hanging out with her for the past few months. 

you tried to think positive and thought they’re just close friends and nothing more than that. you don’t want jealousy to overcome you. you jumped a little when somebody tapped your shoulder from behind. you turned around and giggled. “you scared me do you know that!” you pinched hoseok’s arm. he chuckles and rolls his eyes. 

“wow you should’ve said thank you for snapping you into reality cause classes are starting soon and this woman here is blocking the hallway just by standing here” he scoffs. you laughed at his words and smacks his arm earning a whine from him. both of you walks to your class as hoseok offers to send you to your class before going to his. you sit at your place and smiled.

**at least there's someone that can make my day better even without you** you thought as your heart cringes remembering what happened just now. you shook your head and try to focus in class.   

day by day has passed and your communication with jimin is still the same, but fading away. you feel like you're not his girlfriend anymore. honestly, you were disturbed by it to the extent that you're not being yourself. your face started to become pale and you're starting to become skinnier. you were on your way back home from the supermarket to buy groceries since you're having limited stock at home. you were thinking of what to cook when you get home but stopped your tracks suddenly when you hear a familiar voice. 

"yes there it is, baby. touch me there" a female voice said in a tone full of lust. you went to the direction that attracts you and frowns. it couldn't be... oh yes it is.. park jimin and the girl that you always see with him in school. you stopped and look at them kissing and touching each other. your heart hurts like it's been sliced thinly and you were crying hard in silence. the feeling of sad, hurt, anger, frustration, betrayal, were all mixed up and hitting you over and over again like someone is hitting you endlessly. you walked away from the scene feeling betrayed and heartbroken. 

you tried to forget and ignore what happen but it still lingers in your mind, replaying and replaying non-stop. **~~~~~, it's okay. he's probably full of lust since you didn't even let him take your away. just move on from it ~~~~** you reminded yourself. the following days, you avoided him even if he doesn't even notice you. whenever you saw him, you'll turn away and walk the other direction. whenever you see the other bangtan members too, you'll ignore them. little did you know, jimin was kind of worried for you but he denies it. he wasn't like this before and he doesn't know why he have these worried feelings for you.   

the bell rang indicating that its lunch time. you closed your book and stretched yourself. you lie your head on the table and sigh. it's like a normal routine for you to stay in class and not eating in the cafeteria. you don't seem to have appetite these days. suddenly, a sausage bun appears in front of your eyes. you look up and frowned. the person smiles and sits in front of you. "why did you stop going lunch with us? the guys keeps on asking about you. stop going on a diet, you have a great body already" jimin said. you give him a wry smile not knowing how to react. 

"it's not that im on a diet, i just don't feel like eating" you take the bun and eats a little. **oh please if you know that the reason all this happen is because of you yet you can still go around kissing the girl and still have the guts to face me** you thought while munching another bite. 

out of sudden, his finger brushed your lips to wipe the sauce that is visible at the area near your lips. your heart beats fast when you look at him. he moves closer to you and cups your cheeks. he closed his eyes and leans closer to kiss you. you melted in his kiss and kisses him back.

both of you stopped to breathe. he stares straight into your eyes and smiles. "it's time to go back to class now. see you soon" he kisses your forehead and ruffles your hair. once he get out of your class, your classmates starts to fill in as class is starting soon. but you were dazed with a smile, touching your lips and replaying the scene again and again. it just makes you giddy all over your body. your first kiss after months. but the question is.... what did he do that? why did he suddenly talk to you? 

the weekends has come and you were on your bed still, browsing tumblr. while you're scrolling and reblogging posts, a text appeared.  

JM : are you perhaps free today? you smiled at the text and quickly replied. 

YOU : yes i am. what's up? 

you were waiting for jimin to reply back. you put your phone on your tummy while you stare at the ceiling. a date after a long time? how exciting it is. you imagined what will happen during the date. you just can't stop thinking about it. suddenly, your phone vibrates.

 JM : okay cool. come to my house so that we can watch movie together.

you replied an "okay" and quickly get up to your closet. you look at the clothes and bites your lips while tilting your head to the right. you didn't know what to wear. you take a plain black t-shirt out and shakes your head. you slide your finger along your clothes and stops at an outfit. you take out a floral dress and looks at the mirror. you battled your eyelashes playfully and giggled at your foolishness. after choosing your outfit, you washed up and get dressed.

you unlock the pin to jimin's apartment and look for him. you go to his room and hear water rushing in the bathroom. jimin's probably washing himself up. you were about to walk out when you hear a vibration at the dressing table. you look over at the direction and look at the bathroom. you tiptoed to the dressing table and presses the home button. your eyes widened at the text. 

 Jagiya♥  : oppa you're coming here in the evening right? oppa you cant break your promise okay! don't spend to much time on that , i hate it :( 

b-.. wow you sobbed at the text. **im a to both of you huh.. so you were cheating behind my back. then what is the kiss all about. what is this date all about. what is this bull you're playing around with me?!** you thought angrily. suddenly, you hear the shower tap stopped. you walk away quickly to sit on the sofa in the living room and wipe your tears away. 

"oh you're here already. are you early or am i late to wash up?" he dries his hair with a towel. he was silently impressed on what you wear today. it was simple yet beautiful and feminine. you smiled lightly as you didn't even feel like facing him right now. he chose a movie and sits beside you, putting an arm behind you and bringing you closer. you scoff silently and didn't snuggle him back. 

your hands were kept to yourself all the time. it was a comedy movie and jimin's the only one that laughs. you were thinking on the text you saw just now. you were really not in the mood because of it and jimin didn't even notice it.

the movie ended and jimin looks at you. "it was good wasn't it?" he looks at you with a satisfied face. you nod curtly and look away. "let's go!" he holds your hands and gets up. "to where?" you frowned. "urm eat? im hungry...?" he frowns.

 you bite your lips feeling hesitant and looks at the clock. **5:50pm. i rather go back home. eating with you is more like you'll think about her when you come to her house** "~~~~?" he snapped his fingers in front of you. "i don't think i can urm i got to go" you take your bag and walk out of the house quickly. **its much better to leave now so that you can reach early to her house isn't it. its not like you want me here** you thought. 

you switched on your bedroom light and plop yourself on the bed crying harder than ever. how many times did he do this to you? how long did he cheat on you? why did he lead you on? if he likes someone else, he should've broke up with you and not leave you having this one-sided love? all these questions were in your mind making you cry uncontrollably. 

you were on the verge of giving up on him. why love someone who doesn't love you back? once again, you vowed to avoid him and ignore what has happened. it sounds stupid but you can't help to let him go for now. you confessed to him and it's hard to make park jimin accept a girl that easily. why? he has lots of fangirls aka girls who fall head over heels for him. and you? you're just an average-looking girl. soon, you got tired of crying and fell asleep.  

you didn't feel like going to school the next day but you have to. you looked into the mirror and sobbed. your eyes were visibly swollen and you have rings under your eyes. you sighed looking at your pathetic self and was amazed at how park jimin changed you. you used the concealer to hide your eye bags and takes your bag. you opened the door and was shocked to see jimin waiting for you outside your house. 

"you're done already? come on we're going to be late" he walks ahead of you. wow first time going to school with him after months. you were silent all the way to school. jimin’s attention was into his phone all along texting someone. the smile when he receives the message really annoys you. ** are you even sincere to go to school with me, park jimin? you could've make an effort to talk to me but you're beside me texting to god knows who the person is. what's your motive to go to school with me seriously ** you thought. 

you were starting to get really irritated but luckily you're about to reach school. "~~~~ah i have to go. i need to buy something" he said and pecks your lips quickly. you nod your head and goes into your school but follows him when he goes to the other direction. he walks quickly to a near deserted place and waits for someone. 

his face enlightens when he sees someone. you looked at who is it and your heart drops. the girl that was with him that day... she finally found him and runs towards him. they hug each other and shares a passionate kiss. you were watching them all along and it hurts a lot. you couldn't take it anymore and run back to school. suddenly, a horn startled you and before you could avoid it, you fell to the floor and your vision blackens. 

you opened your eyes to look at the clear white spacious room. "~~~~?" your cousin, haein gets up to look at you. you look at your clothes and the surroundings. you frown. you tried to get up but failed. you tried again but a guy helps you up. you look at him and smiled feeling thankful. it was namjoon. you look at the people who is present. all of bangtan members were here and also haein. but something feels not right. you look at your right side again and frowns. "u-urm noona.. jimin hyung is kind of busy but he asked you to take care" jungkook speaks up nervously.

you look away, feeling your heart hurting again. **busy.. i got admitted in the hospital and you didn't even come for me... you probably don't care about me anymore** you sighed. "anyways, unnie why am i here?" you frowned. you look at yourself to see any visible wounds. you move the blanket that is covering you to the side and look at your casted leg. you look at haein and frown. "~~~~, you didn't remember? y-you got knocked down by a car and.. you need surgery for your bone fracture " haein stuttered while looking sadly at you.

spending your days waiting for surgery day is like a hell to you. everyone is there, bangtan members and haein. but only park jimin. he's the one that you need the most by your side right now. whenever he's not there, jungkook or taehyung would give lots of excuses to cover jimin. you don't feel like loving him already. he's been hurting your heart a lot of times and you can't take it anymore. 

you fiddled with your fingers feeling bored as always. you can't wait to go out of the hospital since your surgery has ended. suddenly, the door opened revealing park jimin with a simple white t-shirt, black jeans and black cardigan. he look handsome as always but your heart still hurts after what he has been doing. he sits beside you and stares at you then your leg. "oh look finally the person that i've been waiting for is here at last" you said, full of sarcasm. he stares at you emotionlessly, not saying anything. "~~~~! here's some food i--" haein stops talking when she saw jimin sitting beside you. her face becomes serious and puts the food she bought on your table. "i-im just gonna go out. sorry for disturbing" she glares at jimin and walks away.

the atmosphere was really awkward. you were staring at your fingers and the window the whole time while he's using his phone. you get up a bit to grab the cup of water beside your table but it was slightly far from your bed. jimin pushes you to bed gently and takes the cup for you. you took the cup and drink it without saying thank you. he clears his throat before looking at you. "how's your leg..? and also the surgery?" he asked. "fine. perhaps better if you're by my side but nah it's okay. it's already in the past anyways" you look away.

he stares at you until his phone rang. he goes out of the room to answer it. you lie down on your bed back and let your tears run down your cheeks. moments later, jimin opens the door and you pretended to sleep. he your hair and kisses your forehead. "i need to go now. take care and get well soon" he pats your head and walks out of the room. you opened your eyes and turn yourself to look at the door, crying hard. **why do you have to hurt me so badly? what did i deserve? are you trying to play with my feelings? if you're here just for the sake of it, then might as well you don't visit me jimin** you sighed.

you take your books and closed the locker to get the shock of your life. taehyung was grinning at you and giggled at your shock face. "good morning! how are you feeling?" he asked while battling his eyelashes. you laugh and smacks his arm. "im alright of course" you flip your hair sassily. "~~~~, youre going right? this saturday?" you frowned. **saturday? whats with saturday?** you thought and shakes your head. "jimin hyung didnt tell you? we're having a dance competition at a club" he blinks his eyes, surprised by her question. "a-ah yes he told me about it.. i forget haha thanks for reminding!" he nodded and walk away. tears were starting to form and threatening to fall. **why didnt he tell me about this.. arent i his girlfriend** you thought. you sighed and walks to your class for lesson.

the school bell has rung and you waited for jimin at the front gate. you glanced at your watch and sigh. your eyes lit up when you say a familiar figure. you walk towards him and smile. he raised his eyebrows and look at you puzzled. "i thought of going home with you" you look at him with hopeful eyes.

the whole time you walk beside him was awkward as ever. you clear your throat and look at him. "jimin can i ask you something?" he nods his head. "i dont want to sound like an over-protective girlfriend but.. who is the girl that you're always with in school?" you asked. "who? soyeon? she's just a classmate of mine and a close friend ever since i was 6" he said.

**but close friends doesn't kiss each other unless they have mutual interest isn't it** you thought. “jimin.. how do you describe your love for me?” you asked. he stopped abruptly and look at you, frowning. “what kind of nonsense are you talking about? i love you the same way you do. why are you asking that?” you look away, feeling bad that you question his love for you.

“i was just asking. nothing more than that. it's just that i don't want someone that can make you love her more than me nor you to love someone more than me. i mean… you wouldn't do that if you love the same way as i do right?” he avoids having eye contact and started walking ahead of you.

you were in the club feeling uncomfortable as ever but for jimin's sake, you're here to support him. lots of eyes were on you making you feel unsafe. you were only wearing a black knee-length dress with black heels. while you were looking for someone, a gentle tap on your shoulder startled you. you turned around feeling scared but smile afterwards. "~~~~! wow you look stunning today! come on, follow me!" taehyung holds your hand and drags you to bangtan. the members were noisy as always, complimenting on how y and gorgeous you are. jimin was shocked to see you here but eyes you from top till bottom. he puts his hand behind your back and pushes you somewhere where not many people is around.

"w-why are you here? you look beautiful tonight though" jimin said looking at your body again. your heart flutters hearing him complimenting you, but you felt sad when you hear the first part. its like he doesn't want you to be here. when you're about to say something, yoongi interrupted that its going to be their turn to perform. jimin looks at you then walks away following yoongi. you walk back to the club and waits for bangtan to perform.

the dance was synchronized and well-performed. you were always awed at the way they perform and proud to be one of the members' girlfriend. but is he proud to have you? you watched the other groups perform till the end of the competition, and of course bangtan wins it. people were dancing, grinding on each other, others be drinking and here you are sitting quietly with bangtan talking among themselves. you realized that jimin isn't there talking to bangtan. you frowned. you excused yourself and gets out of the vip room to find jimin. you go to the dancing floor and find him, but there's no sight of him. you can't find him anywhere in the club. you gave up and goes to the toilet.

as youre wiping your hands with tissue, you hear a familiar voice at a quiet area. you peek and see jimin and soyeon. "babe why are you here? can't you wait when im home? she's here and we're gonna be dead if sh--" she puts her finger on his lips and smirked. "who cares? i can't wait for you anymore" she said and smacks her lips on his. you tried to look away but you can't. you've locked your eyes on them. the sight of them kissing hungrily, jimin sliding his hands up into her shirt, her hands on his waist.

your heart feels like it's been stepped and thrown at the wall again and again. how many times has he done this behind your back? once? twice? thrice? perhaps a hundred times but you let it be? you wanted to scold yourself for letting it slip but you love him. you love him endlessly. but does he? he's probably playing around with your feeling just because you're the one who have a crush on him and confess? you're like the fool now in your relationship. you regret it so much right now. you regret to have a crush on him and even confess your love. . your love for him... is starting to fade away. you're going to give in to him, not anymore.

"oh, miss. im sorry!" a guy bumped into you causing jimin and soyeon to stop their make out session. jimin's eyes went wide open and pulls away from her. tears are starting to form as your mind replayed the scene that you observed just now. you shake your head and walk out from the scene.

"no, ~~~~" he grabs your arm tightly, trying to make you not escape from him. you push his hand harshly. "don't touch me with that filthy hand of yours, park jimin." you said, with a sign of detest towards him. you turn your back to him. "there's no need to explain. i saw everything." you look at him with rage and walk away from him, out of the club.

"happy birthday ~~~~! stay y and adorable! if hyung hurts you, dont worry and come to me!" taehyung winks and chuckles. the other members insults taehyung while you giggle. "eat anything you want and jin hyung will pay!" jungkook shouted. it was your 18th birthday. bangtan would always celebrate it with you as your parents tend to be busy overseas. this time, they planned to treat you at a restaurant. the food was delicious with great company around you. but what attracts you is that jimin is eating quietly and emotionlessly. he looks like he doesn't even want to be here. perhaps he was still not over the club incident. remembering the scene back at the club makes you lose your appetite but you force yourself to eat. 

you were waiting outside with the members while waiting for jin to pay for it. you look at jin who just came out of the restaurant and lightly bows your head. "thank you so much for celebrating and also paying for it oppa" you said in a hush thankful tone. jin smiled and ruffles your hair. when it's time to say goodbye, you hug each of them and when its jimin's turn, you hug him lightly. you walk away from them and sighed. you heard footsteps behind you and before you could turn around, the person walks beside you. "let's watch a movie again? just us?" he pants. 

the movie was great, but your attention was somewhere else. you still feel hurt over the incident that you observe at the club. you took a deep breath and let it out. "jimin can i ask you something?" you asked, still looking at the tv. he looks at you and mumbles a "hmm". "what am i to you?" you asked. after moments of him keeping quiet, you look at him. "that's a simple question and you can't answer? am i not your girlfriend?" you asked feeling hurt. "im getting tired of your attitude jimin. you think i didn't know what you did behind my back even though i caught you that time at the club? cheating behind my back? kissing and touching behind my back? is this my punishment for loving you park jimin? is it because i had a crush on you and confess that's why you just accept my confession to make me suffer? is that it? do you even have the slightest bit of love for me?" you wipe your tears.

"why aren't you answering me? so what im saying is true? you didn't even love me?" he looks down. you heaved a huge sigh and gets up from the sofa. "i regret having a crush on you. i regret confessing to you. i regret giving you all my love when i receive nothing! is it fun for you to play with my feelings park jimin?! lets break up" you look away. "i don't want to have my heart hurt again for someone who doesn't even love me back. i don't want to waste my time loving someone who didn't give me any affection but cheats behind my back. i feel like im tying you up and not letting you fall for who you love. you can do whatever you want from now on. goodbye, jimin" you take your bag and walks away. you let your tears run down your cheeks. you're glad that you let your feelings that you've been bottling out from your chest. now, you're going to try to move on from him. you're not going to get your heart hurt again.

-JIMIN'S POV-

jimin stood there feeling shock. **so this is how she feel? wow jimin youre such a jerk. you played with her heart without knowing** he thought. but the question you gave him keeps playing in his mind. does he even have the slightest affection for you? he doesn't know. he's not sure about his feelings for you. why did he even accept your confession at the first place? he sighed. the night that you decided to break up with him was a misery to him. his mind keeps flashing back to the memories he had with you. your smiles, your laughter, your touch, your shyness, your cooking and your kiss..... every part of it keeps on playing in his mind. and honestly, he misses it. he misses you.

he regret for taking you for granted when you're together with him. you've been showering him with love and affection but he doesn't even show a slight one like a one-sided love. he now knows that he do love you but he doesn't know when it started. he looks at his phone tempting to call you but he doesn't want to make your heart hurt again. he puts his arm on his eyes and forces himself to sleep.