LOL. NO. This isn't for me. I hurriedly got off the elevator. Trying to hide my nervousness by clenching my shaking fists, I went to the guard again. ''Excuse me, I think this isn't for me, or maybe it's just a...prank?''

        ''No, it's really for you, Skylar. A prank? That I don't know about. He just said to give it to you.''

        ''Oh. Okay. Thank you again.''

        ''Are you alright? What does it say?''

        ''Nothing, just something not important,'' I said and hid the letter in my pocket. I went back to the elevator and ran to my dorm. Before I went inside, I read the note again. I'm not dreaming. But who is this from? What kind of sh*t is this?

        ''Oh! Skye! You're home!'' Jihyun was sitting on the couch, watching a drama series.

        ''Yep. I'm kind of tired. Just got one of those panic attacks again,'' I said with a sigh.

        ''What?! Are you alright?'' She stood up and checked if I have a fever. Oh. So she's not mad at me anymore.

        ''I'm fine now, but already sleepy. I'm just go gonna sleep,'' I said as I squeezed her hand.

        ''Okay, but Jihoon went here. He told me everything. I just want to say that you wrecked my sailing OTP! Haha. But it's fine, as long as that's what you think is right,'' she said.

        ''Thank you for understanding, Jihyun,'' I said and she nodded. I got my water bottle and went to my room. I kicked my shoes off and let the bed get a hold of my tired body. Looking at the ceiling, I still couldn't think of who might have given me the letter. Ugh. this. I'm scared, he's right, but why should I be? Does he know what scares me? It's just a nonsense note, a nonsense threat. Alright, I'll let this go for now. Don't think about it, Skye. Don't make a big deal out of it. Don't. Just forget it. I reached for the drawer and got my medicines. I hate the texture of tablets. You can feel them pass your throat. Then, I let myself drift to sleep.

        I woke up at 3am because of my vibrating phone under my pillow. I saw Minho's name and smiled although the light was hurting my eyes. He texted me.

        ''I don't know if this will wake you or what because your phone is under your pillow, but I don't care. I just want to check on you. Are you still alive?'' Although I'm still sleepy, he made me laugh. What kind of question is that? Haha.

        ''Yes, sir. Still breathing, but it's still too early! I don't care if you're already awake or what but let me sleep in peace. You know I'd wake up! You know I'm tired but you still texted me!'', I replied, aiming to seem mad. You know, you should act like you're angry sometimes, because...I don't know. It's just fun to mess with him. Haha. Then, he called. Skye used crazy mad woman. It's super effective!

        ''Annyeong!'', I answered.

        ''Ah~. Mianhe~,'' he said, sounding like a child. I bet he even did aegyo over the phone. ''Rest some more, okay?''

        ''You want me to rest but you called? Just what are you thinking right now?''

        ''Mianhe~. I'll hang up,'' he said.

        ''Anyo! Wait! Why are you awake?'', I said as I sat up quickly, like it would stop him.

        ''I don't know. I just woke up and now I can't sleep,'' he said. His voice was still hoarse. He lied. He sounded sleepy. Maybe he just needed to go to the comfort room. Oh well, at least he thought of me before he go to sleep again.

        ''Hmm. And now I can't sleep too because you woke me up in the middle of my dream,'' I said. I lied. I didn't even have a dream, or at least I don't remember it. It was all just black. LOL.

        ''Oh~. What were you dreaming about?'' I imagined him smiling. Of course, he's expecting that it's about him.

        ''That you were singing for me,'' I said. He hates singing over the phone, but I got him this time!

        ''Oh. Okay. Go to sleep, then,'' he said. Oh no, you can't just dodge the bullet.

        ''You have to sing for me now,'' I said.

        ''Ha-ha. No,'' he said and chuckled. ''Go to sleep.''

        ''Then make me go to sleep. Just sing, or rap. Rap 'Don't Flirt' for me,'' I said. Haha! It should be really embarrassing!

        ''Shiro! Go to sleep.''

        ''No.''

        ''Then I'm hanging up.''

        ''Fine. Hang up.'' Wow. He really doesn't want to do it. Oh wow. He really did hang up! Fine! I just lied down again and put my phone under my pillow. He won't be able to talk to me tomorrow! That freaking jerk! He woke me up and hang up just like that! How dare he?! Ugh! I'm just acting a little childish, and I thought he would just ride on it but no! He left me hanging! He just--. I hurriedly grabbed my phone and saw his name again. I opened the message and it was a voice mail.

        ''Kki jom burijima...'' And he sang the first verse! He sounded like he's whispering, but his low voice was so y. ''Sleep well~.'' I was really mean to him. He's just too nice to give in. So I decided to send a voice mail too. And it's really awkward. I couldn't think of something to say. Pssh. He probably did go to sleep already. But what if he didn't? What should I--. And I accidentally pressed the record button. TT

        ''Ah. Ah. Ah.'' I was shocked that my heart was beating so fast. I don't know what to say. It's like he's just in front of me and waiting for me to talk. ''Mino-ah! Saranghae!'', I finally said and ended it. I replayed the recording and it was awful. I was really shocked. I don't even know why I panicked. It's not like it'll send automatically. I can redo it, but I guess that was what I wanted to do or to say all along. So I just sent it to him and put my phone away. I was just smiling like a fool, imagining his laugh while he's listening to my message. He always over reacts. Yah, Skylar. Go sleep, you're crazy.

        I woke up early, ready to start a new day. I won't let anything ruin this day. Please, let this day be good.

        ''Good morning, Jihyun-chan~,'' I said. She's half asleep while walking out of her room. She headed to the restroom then sat beside me. ''Do you want me to get you a bowl of cereal too?'' She just nodded, staring blankly at nothingness.

        ''Arigato~,'' she said as I gave her breakfast.

        ''What are your plans for today?''

        ''Hmm. Nothing special. Just work for today,'' she said. ''How about you?''

        ''Same.''

        ''I bet it's gonna be awkward between you two.''

        Oh. Jihoon. Right. ''No. We got over it pretty fast. It's like nothing ever happened.''

        ''Ha. I think otherwise. Well, good luck. I still think that it's better for you to pursue a relationship with him,'' she said and smiled.

        As I was walking towards the cafe, my footsteps were getting heavier. No, Skye. Don't be affected. Jihoon's fine. You did not hurt him.

        ''Annyeong!'' He greeted me like what he always does. See? Nothing wrong.

        ''Good morning,'' I said and smiled.

        ''Did you have a good sleep?''

        ''Ahh. Yes. Does it show? Haha.''

        ''Hmm. Not quite. I was thinking that you had a rough night,'' he said as he was cleaning the counter.

        ''Really?'' Well, that's weird. I actually think I'm blooming today. But he's right. It's been a rough night for me. Minho's there though; he made it bearable.

        ''Anyway, we don't have work tomorrow. The lady in purple said there's something to fix in the cafe, electricity or something. I don't care what it is though. What's important is that we have a day-off. Haha.''

        ''Daebak! I really need that!''

        ''Me too! So many things to plan! I'm ecstatic! Haha!''

        ''Ah annyeonghasseo,'' I said and bowed to our first customer. He's pretty early. Really early. Even though there's still a few minutes before we open, I let him in. He's an old man, maybe in his early 70s already. He ordered a cup of coffee and just sat down at the corner. He looked so down. I don't have grandparents anymore, so it's sad for me to see that. Since there were still no other customers yet, I approached him. ''Annyeonghasseo, sir. Do you mind if I sit with you?'' He nodded and I sat in front of him, placing my own coffee on the table. ''It's a good day, right? I'd go fishing if I don't have to work, or maybe just have a stroll at the park while eating ice cream.'' He didn't even talk. I want to cheer him up. ''Aigoo~. I also have the same coffee as yours. It's great, right, sir?''

        ''Thank you,'' he said and stared at me. I was shocked. ''You remind me of someone.''

        ''Does this person look like me, sir?''

        ''De. She's as beautiful as you. She's also as kind as you. She has this cheerful tone in her voice too. You two have the same smile,'' he said, and I saw him smile a little.

        ''Then I should meet her!''

        ''You can, but she can't go here. You know, she's in the hospital. She's sick,'' he said. His voice was shaking and he had to put down his coffee. He just stopped moving for a moment, probably composing himself. I think he's trying his best not to cry.

        ''Oh. I'm sorry, sir.'' I also felt down. I wanted to cheer him up, but I guess all I can do is to listen.

        ''She's my wife. You know what, she'll be really happy if she'll meet you.''

        ''Then I can go to the hospital, sir,'' I said. Although I may seem weird, for telling that to a stranger, but what the hell, I miss having to accompany elderly people. Just thinking of the moments that my grandparents and I have makes me cry. Also, it's just a visit. There's nothing wrong with that.

        ''But you know, she can't--.''

        ''It's fine, sir. I'll do all the talking to cheer her up! Haha. I'll make her so happy that she'd want to go out of the hospital and hang out with me,'' I said. He laughed and it brought joy to me.

        ''Alright, alright. Haha,'' he told me the name of the hospital and the room number and I was quick to jot it down. ''I'm Mr. Lee Min Joo, by the way. Come visit anytime,'' he said. We talked for a few minutes more until he had to go.

        ''Well, you two had a good talk there,'' Jihoon said.

        ''Yeah. I just thought he needed someone to talk to,'' I said as I was heading for the kitchen.

        ''Noona, whom did you talk to?'' And I stopped walking. Ani, my heart stopped beating. ''We have to talk like that too!'' There's nothing like being shouted at by Namdiva early in the morning.

        ''Oh! Annyeonghasseo!''

        ''Guess who's back! We are WINNER!,'' they said like they're in a show. Haha. These guys are just so silly. Jihoon greeted them and they approached us.

        ''Oh! Oh! Is it true that you got sick?'', Jinwoo oppa asked. His eyes were like getting bigger.

        ''De, oppa, but I'm better than fine now,'' I said and gave him the brightest smile.

        ''Woa! Woa! You really look better now! Noona is getting prettier!'', Seungyoon said. He really likes to compliment people, especially ladies. Haha.

        ''Gomawo~.''

        ''Are you really really fine now? Like, nothing really hurts? Nothing bothering you?'', Seunghoon oppa asked in series.

        ''Aish, hyung. She's better now.''

        ''How did you know? What if she's--.''

        ''Eiii...hyung! She called me a while ago, alright? We had a long talk, better than the talk she had before we arrive,'' Taehyun lied and we just laughed. Seunghoon oppa seemed like he did not get it though. Haha.

        ''How about your ankle?'' Minho was the only one to remember that. ''You have to return my bandage clean.'' Woa. What is this? mode on? Are we going to start role playing now?

        ''Ah de, but I forgot it at home. Mianhe,'' I said while looking as innocent as possible.

        ''Kwenchana. Keep it then. I really don't expect for you to return it anyway.'' Hmm. He's like making a sequel of the Strongest Kpop Survival, acting all gangsta and all. If only they know that if it's just the two of us here, he'd be like a child dancing around and rapping nonsense; like a diss rap for ants.

        Anyway, they ordered and was about to go. ''Come join us for lunch. Same place, and same table this time,'' Seunghoon oppa said and Jihoon and I just nodded.

        ''So, we can just close the cafe for an hour, right? Let's go have lunch with them,'' Jihoon said.

        I spent hours thinking what could happen at lunch. I mean, Minho and I should act like we despise each other like hell. Taehyun and Seunghoon oppa will surely observe us. Then, there's Jihoon. It might be awkward for Minho too. The struggle is real.

        ''It's going to be fine because I hate you,'' Minho texted. Oh the irony.

        ''Jihoon, do you think I should call Jihyun to join us? I mean, she loves WINNER so much.''

        ''Yeah. That'll be great.'' And so I called her and she's more than willing to come. She even squealed! I love it when she's so happy she might faint.

        Jihoon and I went to the resto. We were the first ones so we just chose a long table. ''I think we should for them before we order,'' I said. ''Oh! Oh! There's Jihyun!''

        ''Uhm, Skye? What are you doing? Don't hide behind me. Don't hide under the table,'' Jihoon whispered.

        ''Don't look at me! Just tell her to sit down immediately!'' I heard Jihyun's footsteps and I was trying so hard not to giggle. Haha.

        ''Ohh, Jihyun-ah,'' Jihoon said calmly.

        ''Where's Skye? Is she in the restroom?'' I could see her legs. Gawd. Sit down already!

        ''Ah. De. Sit down. The others are going to be here soon.'' Yizz. She finally sat down! Yass. I'm going to scare the sh*t out of her! Haha! But before I could even reach for her leg, she stood up and--''Annyeonghasseo!''. And I hit my head to the table! ! I was the one who got shocked. T.T

        ''Sh*t. It hurts,'' I whispered as I was holding my head. Omo. They're already standing in front of the table. Now I'm too embarrassed to even get up!

        ''Skye?'', Jihyun asked. ''What are you doing?''

        Get up, Skye! ''Oh. Nothing.'' I stood up and all of them were staring at me! T.T

        ''Did you...bump your head?'', Seunghoon oppa asked.

        ''I thought you're in the rest--,'' Jihyun said and I cut her off.

        ''Yah! Haha! I was just tying my shoelaces. Haha! De, I bumped my head! How clumsy of me, right?'' . My fake laugh sounded weird. They were all just dazed, except for Minho who was chuckling at the back. I couldn't help but chuckle at my silliness too. LOL.

        It was relieving that they just let go of it and ordered food. We started to dig in as soon as the food arrived.

        ''Hyung, thank you for inviting us to eat with you all,'' Jihoon said.

        ''It's because we're going to be busy soon,'' Seunghoon oppa said. What? Minho didn't tell anything about it. ''We have less than a week, and then we'll fly abroad for our schedules.''

        ''Oh de! I saw your schedule for the whole month,'' Jihyun said. Well Jihyun beat me on that one.

        ''Chincha? It'll be better if you and Skye can attend them too,'' Jinwoo oppa said as he smiled at us. Ugh. He's too pretty! He's so fair with just a plain V-neck shirt on! At the same time, he looked cool with a black snapback.

        ''Oh. If only we can, but we also have work. Since you're going to be busy, you should make the most out of the days that you have free time, right?''

        ''De. I'm not going to waste a second!'', Minho said with excitement.

        ''Pssh. Please, you're just going to eat the hell out of those days,'' Taehyun said and smirked.

        ''Ah! Anya~.''

        ''Hugeboy, don't eat a lot. You're not going to fit your suit,'' Seungyoon said as he teased Minho by eating a huge chunk of meat. Haha. Minho just pouted and held his head down.

        ''But then he'll suit the name 'Hugeboy' though! Haha!'', I said and they all laughed.

        ''Yah. Then you have to stop eating!'', Minho said.

        ''Wae?''

        ''Because you're already stealing the 'huge' in 'Hugeboy'! Haha!'' What the hell. Since he was in front of me, I kicked his leg. But Taehyun was the one who jerked! No! I just kicked the precious leg of our maknae! He just stared at me and I had to look down. T.T

        ''Aiii...hyung! Don't tell noona those kinds of things! Just stop it!'' Taehyun pushed him.

        ''Taehyun-ah, kwenchana. We're all just joking around,'' I said, reaching my hand to tap Taehyun's shoulder. ''It's fine.'' But what I really meant was 'I'm sorry'.

        ''Those kinds of jokes will lead to petty quarrels later,'' he said. Oh my. What is he implying? That Minho and I--.

        ''You're too affected, Taehyun,'' Seunghoon oppa said. ''Skye is even okay with it. Should we even start a diss rap battle between Skye and Minho? Haha.''

        ''Eiii. I bet Skye will miss Minho that's why she's acting like that. Haha,'' Jihyun said. Whaaa...

        ''Haha! De!'', Seungyoon agreed.

        ''Oh, chincha, Skye?'', Jihoon said. I'm doomed. I'm panicking. Minho and I looked at each other, thinking of what to do.

        ''Is it true? Ha-ha. Sorry, but I'm not going to miss you,'' Minho said and even stuck his tongue out.

        ''Eiiii. So childish,'' Seungyoon teased. ''And then we'll just hear him crying in the bathroom! Ohhh. Hyung has another thing to cry for other than drama series! Haha!''

        ''Yah. Don't talk like watching them is wrong,'' Jinwoo oppa said and we all just laughed. Whoo. We're saved.

        ''Hmm. Are we even sure that Minho's the one that Skye is going to miss?'', Seunghoon oppa asked. My gosh, for the sake of your long legs, oppa, please stop. Minho stiffened and they all looked at me.

        ''Ah.'' What to say? ''Ahm.'' Why is my mode not working?! ''I'm going to miss you, oppa.'' .

        ''Chi...chinchayo? Me?''

        ''I'm going to miss you, and Taehyun, and Seungyoon, and Jinwoo oppa and well...Minho too, I guess. I'm going to miss WINNER.'' Damn, Skye. You're digging your grave deeper and deeper.

        ''Ahh. I see,'' Seunghoon oppa said and ate a mouthful of rice until his cheeks were puffy.

        I was already done eating so I excused myself just to escape from all of these. ''Excuse me,'' I said and went to the restroom. I took deep breaths as I was looking at my pale reflection on the mirror. Wow. I was really nervous. Stay here for a few minutes, Skye. Calm your nerves down.

        ''Hey,'' Jihyun said as she entered the restroom.

        ''Hey.''

        ''You're really close with them. I'm proud of you,'' she said as she reapplied her lipstick.

        ''It's just because I'm working at a cafe near their building.''

        ''Maybe, but you and Minho are always fighting. Although if I'm being honest, I'm a little jealous. I want to have hateful conversations with him too! Haha! Are you still working on your plan to destroy him?''

        ''Uhm. Yes. Why?'' No, I already forgot about that. I really have to tell Jihyun about relationship as soon as possible.

        ''Because, you know, I think it's working.''

        ''Really? But we're always fighting. I really think that he'll never be fond of me. How can you that it's working?''

        ''Pssh, Skye. You're better than that. The more you hate, the more you love, right? I think you two are just playing that game,'' she said, looking straight at me.

        ''Jihyun, Minho and I--.''

        ''Hurry up, okay?'' Before I could tell her the truth, she walked out. I'm feeling guilty, but is telling the truth the right thing to do? Am I going to lose Jihyun as a friend?

        We parted our ways and Jihoon and I went back to the cafe. The hours seemed longer, and as soon as we closed the cafe, I headed to the hospital. I remembered being confined in one of the rooms here, thinking of the moment how much I hated Minho but at the same time still loving him, and realizing how much my friends care for me.

        ''Here it is, room 305,'' I said to myself as I knocked on the door.

        ''Oh, Skylar. It's good to see you,'' Mr. Lee welcomed me, walking with his wooden cane. I gave him the fruits I bought on the way. As I stepped inside the white-walled room, smelling the scent of disinfectant, and feeling the cold and dry air, I felt weak.

        ''Yeobo, she's the girl I'm talking about. Skylar is here,'' Mr. Lee said, making his tone sound happy.

        ''Annyeonghasseo,'' I said and bowed. And I was just standing there, looking at a woman lying on the bed, asleep. Her hair was all grey, just like his husband's. Her skin was pale, though she's not too skinny. She's beautiful. ''It's nice to meet you, Mrs. Lee.'' They say that people in comatose might be able to hear their surroundings. They say that they know what's going on. And so, I sat beside Mr. Lee, telling wonderful stories to his wife; how I grew up abroad, how I got my first dog, how my brother put whipped cream on my face while I was sleeping, and how my father put me on his shoulders when I was little. I wanted to tell her all of the fun memories I have, hoping that they might make her feel again, and talk again. I even told her about my relationship with Minho, but I stopped at the middle of my story, seeing Mr. Lee wiping his tears silently beside me. Why does he have to suffer like this? How can you make him wait for you like this?

        ''Yeobo, isn't Skylar a wonderful girl? She's just like you, right?'' He's tone was lively, but his face looked otherwise.

        ''Mr. Lee, are you--.'' He stopped me from speaking and just motioned for us to go out of the room. We sat on a bench.

        ''I'm sorry you have to see me like that,'' he said with trembling voice.

        ''It's good to weep, sir. How long has it been?''

        ''More than a year, almost two.'' he said, and I realized I was crying too.

        ''I'm sorry.''

        ''Don't be. She'll wake up soon, you know. I just have to wait a little longer.''

        ''Do you have children?''

        ''We have two. They have their own families now. They're not giving up too; they shouldn't, we shouldn't.''

        ''How can you do that?''

        ''It hurts so much, you know. Every day, my hope is being tested. I feel empty and I cry every time I attempt to wake her up and get nothing in response. Sometimes I think of ending my life too, just to escape from it all, to leave the pain behind. I wanted to leave. I wanted to be gone, but my love and faith keep pulling me back. I'm being pulled back closer and closer every time I try to run. So there are times that I'm hating myself. How can I think of such doings? There is no reasonable excuse for me to do that. She's the one who got me through life. Who am I to leave her? If she leaves me, it's going to hurt, but I can accept that. But as long as she's still here, I can't just let her down.''

        ''But what if she already wants you to let her go?''

        ''I don't know. I don't know when I can do that. She just have to fight harder so that our sufferings will soon come to an end. I can endure all the pain of waiting. I'm still holding on to my faith in God.''

        I left the hospital drained. I'll never forget the pain in his eyes. I'll never forget how he cried. I would rather be dead than seeing my loved ones weep for me like that. Waiting is just too painful when you don't know if the thing you're waiting for is really going to come. There's no assurance. You can keep your hopes high, but you will pay its price of disappointment if your expectations are not met.

        ''Let's make the most of my free time,'' Minho texted. Yes, we have to make the most out of what we have right now.

        ''Minho-ah,'' I called him. Stop being sad, Skye. It's not part of making the most out of life.

        ''Skye~. My stomach hurts~. I'm in our dorm right now. I feel bad that I can't practice with them.'' He sounded so weak. Maybe he's having a problem on digesting again. ''I'm alone here, so you can come.''

        ''Are you sure that you're really sick? Or you really just want to be with me?''

        ''I really am, but you know, the only good thing about being sick is you taking care of me, so just come here.''

        ''Fine, fine.'' He gave me their address and I bought medicine.

        It was a really cold night, so I rushed to their dorm. I couldn't walk outside any longer. I rang the doorbell and he was quick to open the door for me.

        ''Annyeong~,'' he said sweetly and hugged me tight. He was wearing a black sleeveless shirt and grey sweatpants. His hair looked so messy. He probably just got up from bed. Their dorm is pretty...tidy.

        ''Is your stomach still hurting? Drink this,'' I said and shoved the medicine to him. I walked around their dorm, itching to open the other members' rooms, but that would be rude. I just went in to Minho's room. It's a little messy so I started to clean things up.

        ''Oh. Can you also clean the whole dorm?'', he said when he entered the room. What the hell? I threw a pillow right into his face. ''Haha! I'm just kidding! Sorry!'' Then, he just lied down on the bed. ''Ahh. It still hurts a little.''

        ''Just take a rest! Stop squirming like a worm! Stop rolling over! Stop making snow angels! Is it winter already?!'' Ugh. He just doesn't stop playing. ''I hate you! You don't even act like you're sick at all!''

        ''Can you give me that sweater? I'm a little cold, '' he said as he sat up. I threw it at him. And with one swift move, he was half-. Damn, he looked good, especially with a tattoo. I was just staring at his body like . It's been a long time since I saw him like this. His choco abs was more prominent now, probably because of dancing every day.

        ''I hate you.'' Why are you doing this? Sh*t. This guy will be the death of me.

        ''Yah. What did you just say?'' His low tone was so y and seducing. I was embarrassed and turned my back at him. ''You hate me? Are we still role playing?''

        ''Just...just stop acting like a child,'' I said. 

        ''Okay.'' He pulled me towards him and I lost my balance that I automatically sat on the bed and held onto him. His body was hot and it felt good to touch. He quickly grabbed my hand and placed it on his chest so that I could feel his heart beating, while his other hand held my head. ''So does a child do this?'' And he put his lips on mine.