One of my friends told me that I should go to this famous hypnotherapist, and how he would be able to help me with how out of place I felt in life. I doubted it, but with me “remembering” weird things, my love for Ji that seemed very much unusual and the constant feeling of missing somebody in my life, I thought it couldn’t hurt. Worst case scenario? I’m nuts. Best case scenario? I’m a bit less nuts.

So I booked a session, expecting the only thing that would come out of it would be my wallet getting lighter.

Apparently the guy I was seeing was a pupil of an even more famous hypnotherapist who “claimed” that he could tell me not only what I did in my past lives, but what I did in between them (when I was/am a soul). It was safe to say I was skeptical. But then again, not like I had anything to lose.

So I sat in a leather chair, all the while wondering what the I was doing, and listened as the therapist took me through the motions of going into a trance like state.

“You told me you felt a strange connection to the pictures showing American soldiers going to war during WWII. Go back to that time.” The therapist voice was calm and collected, as he gently led me back, into the deep memories I didn’t know I had.

“The WWII just ended, and my husband Liam…he died. I’m so young…but he was all that I ever had, ever needed. I-I want it to end, the pain, the suffering.”

“Just calm yourself, you are safe. Tell me what happens after.”

“I lived another 10 years, well into my 30s, but it was never the same without Liam. I died of cancer, and nobody was beside me, my whole family already dead.” I whispered, suddenly filled with sadness.

“You are doing good Amy, tell me what happens next.”

“I-I’m floating over my body, but I feel like I must go….like there is this force making me move. There is nothing holding me back, so I let it take me. I’m moving towards the light…I feel so safe. And loved.” I stop talking for a second, enjoying the feeling of passing through the light.

“Continue.” The therapist gently urges me to keep talking-

“I-I’m still confused, but then I see my spirit guide Karen waiting for me. Good God, I’m so happy to see her again.”

The session kept on going as I described being taken through levels and levels of the spirit world. I described how I spoke to Karen about the life that I lived. Karen was happy how I did, even congratulated me on how I handled living without Liam. Although my memories weren’t completely recovered I knew that in past lives I struggled living without my partners. But that was why us souls kept reincarnating, to learn, to overcome our struggles. I still wasn’t quite myself, still affected by the last life I lived, but as I talked to Karen…I felt something was off.

During the session I kept on telling my therapist how for the first time in my long “life” as a soul…I felt like Karen was hiding something from me.

I knew it wasn’t something to hurt me…it was more like she was being cautious.

And at the same time, I also felt like my memories were being blocked…like somebody was trying to not let me get all of them back. I wasn’t a new soul, and I was supposed to have all my memories back by now. I felt like a piece of me was missing, but I couldn’t pinpoint what was the exact problem which was strange.

 I comforted myself by saying that I just needed to get back to my “soul family” and that then I would get all my memories back.

Souls lived, well spent time, in small groups, that I liked to call families. The souls in these families were all on the same level of “maturity” and we helped each other, even on Earth we would help each other. We gave each other comfort, love and support, and when I was finally reunited with them I knew I was really home.

And as I expected, the moment I saw my friends and got surrounded by their energy, my memories came rushing back. In the soul world we all communicate telepathically, and normally can’t hide our thoughts from our families.

My soul mate. Why wasn’t he here?! He would always greet me when I would come back home, and I knew he came back before me. I felt panic rise. Why did they prevent me from remembering him? Why did they make me forget?!

My distress was so apparent that one of my closest friends, a soul named Nuelle approached me, wrapping her energy around me.

“Ami, shhh. Calm.”

“Did something happen?” I asked, feeling her calming energy wash over me… still it wasn’t enough. Me and my soul mate were like pieces of a puzzle, and only together were we really complete.

“That is for the elders to tell you. You just need to calm yourself, nothing bad happened, you know that.” She gently reassured me.

I tried to reach Ryu, my soul mate, telepathically but I couldn’t even feel his energy. Which was very unusual. Usually we could always communicate telepathically, our energies so accustomed to each other that it took little effort.

For the first time in 50 000 years that I have been a soul, I felt despair while home.

Soul mates were souls that were made for each other, we just understood each other better, our energies so compatible it was hard to see where one ended and the other began when we were together.

Ryu and I were, addmitedly, a bit different. While my energy signature was gold, indicating that I was not an immature soul, but I was also not a mature soul either, Ryu’s signature was getting dark blue, indicating that he was a very mature soul. It was actually very rare that souls like him would reincarnate at all, but he would often do that to be with me. Usually soul mates were on the same “level” of maturity, but Ryu and me were an exception. Because of that we weren’t in the same “family” so most of the time we were only together on Earth. He was also a much older soul than I was.

Time moved…fast in the spirit world. If time even existed. But, a while later, while I was studying with my family, trying to see what I still needed to learn in my future lives, Karen approached me, gently leading me to the Elders.

The Elders were a group of very old souls that “us” souls would see every time our lives would end and also every time before our new lives would begin. I hoped the Elders would address the situation with me and Ryu too, not like I could make them talk.

“Ami, welcome.” One of the 5 spoke, his (although the souls are androgynous, we take whatever form we want in the spirit world. Sometimes we just appear as energy, and sometimes we appear as humans) voice full of love and tranquility.

“Thank you, Elder.” I spoke, my voice full of awe and love. In the spirit world there was only place for love and “inner” growth. Rarely did we feel upset…but still I did. I need to know what happened to Ryu.

After the Elders discussed with me the life I lived, telling me what I did right and what I could have done differently (again, souls never judged, we were all beginners at some point, but souls were also never dishonest), I finally came up with the courage to ask about Ryu.

“Please, tell me what happened.” I said, my voice holding a note of worry.

“As you now, Ryu died early in his life as Liam. We wanted for both of you to learn to live alone, without each other. You both did well, but the Elders think that in the next life we will challenge you even more. Both Ryu and you need to learn to find each other on Earth, without discussing it here, without making plans here. Your bond is so unusual, with Ryu being much older and advanced, although it helps that you exhibit a very strong affinity to learn and mature quickly. That is why we decided to not let you contact each other. I know it’s hard Ami, but you two need to learn and experience this. Usually soul mates go through this when both of the souls are very mature, and soon will stop reincarnating… Ryu will reincarnate less and less now, there is no need for him to live on Earth as often so we decided to do this now. He will become your assigned spirit guide for your next life, as well as Karen, so you two won’t be separated permanently. We just want to prepare you. We’ll see how you will do in this life and then decide what to do next.” He finished, looking at me lovingly. I nodded in understanding. I couldn’t argue with them, and to be honest, I felt relieved that Ryu was okay and that we wouldn’t be separated

.

My next life was a short one. To learn how to deal with pain being inflicted upon me, and to learn how to forgive afterwards, I lived short 15 years as a girl who was abused by her family and later on sold to the slave industry in the Middle East. 2 days shy of her 16^th birthday she was killed by one of her masters…I was killed.

That life was extremely hard. I was abused and scared most of the time. But I always felt a presence with me. When men me, I would always feel like somebody placed a calming hand on my shoulder and a soothing voice would whisper into my ear:

“You’ll be okay. You can survive.”

Really without that presence I would have killed myself, but the presence gave me hope, made me stronger. That was Ryu, acting as my spirit guide, helping me cope.

My soul left my broken body with ease, and I was truly relived when all the physical pain I was in vanished. I stayed for 3 days on Earth, making sure the loved ones I leaved behind, one of who was Nuelle, in a form of another slave girl, were fine. When I finally crossed into the light, going back home, Ryu waited for me.

I somehow still kept the form of the body I just lived my life in, my skin slightly tanned and my wild black hair curly, but Ryu appeared as Liam, a tall, devilishly handsome blonde man, knowing that his appearance would calm me after the hard life I lived.

“Ryu…” I whispered as our energies mixed together, his calming mine.

“I know Ami. But you did well. Both Karen and I agree.” He smiled absently, touching my cheek with his thumb.

“Come on, you need to rest now.” He said and then kept on going, his voice laced with love: “I missed you here. I was with you the whole time, but you were in so much pain that it was sometimes hard to get though you, it was hard to help you. I missed you like this, happy and not suffering” He whispered, smiling gently.

Since I made progress, the Elders decided that in the next life they would let Ryu reincarnate with me. Only we would have to really work to find each other this time. Couldn’t say I was exactly thrilled about it and Ryu wasn’t jumping from happiness either.

Ryu and I weren’t allowed to make any plans for our future life, which would help us find each other, and soon he left the spirit world to be born in another body.

I gasped as I came out of my trance and all the memories of past lives and the spirit world stayed in my mind, mixing together, filling my brain with long lost and forgotten knowledge.

I felt dried tears on my face, as I looked at my therapist. His face was painted with surprise and wonder.

“Amy, your case is extremely rare. You and Ryu…we have no record of this ever happening. But, what is more important, do you have your answers now?” He asked, his smile gentle.

For the first time in this life, I didn’t feel confused and lost.

“Yes, yes I do. Thank you.”

Ryu was Ji, I knew that now. I had no idea how I would make him remember, and I just hoped that his soul would recognize mine. But first I had to actually find him and talk to him.

We had never reincarnated without creating a plan of finding each other, and this would test our love…and us. Because how do I make Ji remember who he really is?

A/N Okay…this was a sort of intro chapter. I’ll explain more about souls and the spirit world along the way. This chappie is not spectacular…I know, sorry :( I just wanted to lay down the ground work. Also, I decided this fic won’t be very long, probably max 10 chapters.

Tell me what you think, and ofc if you have any questions I’ll gladly answer them, since there is a lot I haven’t explained. (Although the best explanation would be reading the book :D I at explaining things, and I also took the “writer’s freedom” thingy to a whole new level in this fic :P)

I hope you all are having a lovely day and please comment :)

P.S. Am I only the only person who is in love with this chapter's picture? Oh the feels :D