Ragged and blurred images of horrendous things ran in Baekhyun’s head. He screamed in pain before he kneels on the floor, Hyemi is long gone with Minjoo. The maids rushed to drag Baekhyun back into the house and the last thing he sees is, his hands reaching out to the poor disheveled look of little Hyemi.

Then it was dark. The stench of iron filled his nostrils and he knew he was lost in a deep slumber.

“Mr. Byun?” A faint voice called out. It was familiar but it wasn’t someone he hoped for. Baekhyun flutter his eyes open, squinting to adjust to the artificial yellow lights. “You’re awake.”

Baekhyun sat up slowly, head low to keep the ache less. It took a lot of effort to see the male sitting by the edge of his bed, all clad in his white suit and smart shirt paired with black pants. The man gave him one of his doctor smiles. 

“You lied.”

The doctor tilt his head. “The truth will hurt you.”

“Why?” Baekhyun croaked. He is angered by the fact that his power is out of control. “I bleed and pass out again. I could die at any moment. Are you smirking?”

“That would be a horrible thing to do, Mr. Park.” again, the doctor flash him a lope sided smile.

Desperately, Baekhyun shifted but it was before he discovered that his limbs are useless. His arms laid limply on the mattress as if there were no skeleton at all. “What… the hell happen to me?!”

“It’ll take time for you to recover, Mr. Byun. Please, stay calm.”

It is more than obvious that the doctor’s words are contrary on Baekhyun as the man panicked, trying so hard to regain the movements in his arms. “This is not stage 2.” It came out as a fact rather than a question.

The doctor stands and take a prescribed medicine on the side table before he sat back on the bed and gave Baekhyun the pills. Baekhyun clenched his jaw shut and purse his lips, turning his head to the side.

“Don’t be such a child. Swallow.” The doctor said sternly. “The sooner you recover, the lesser my worries are, Mr. Byun.”

Baekhyun smirked, though his gaze fell on the pills that set on the palm of the doctor. “I am such a nuisance, right? You don’t have to put up with me, doc.” The doctor frowned, almost losing his professionalism. “You’re free to leave me. I won’t make you stay. Not anymore.”

“Mr. Byun.” The doctor sighed before he turn to see his patient. “You know it’s for the best. I thought we agree to keep this aside.”

“Why?” Baekhyun shot him a glare. He’s angry, but it doesn’t hide the pain within his eyes. “Because I’m a monster. Why settle for less when you can have more?” ironically, Baekhyun repeated the red haired therapist’s words.

“You’re not a monster, Baekhyun. We’re the same, everyone is. Stop treating yourself like a piece of useless human. This is why it never works.” The doctor shook his head, seemingly tired of the argument he exchanged between the ivory eyed male.

Baekhyun looked defeated as he watched him, weakness etched on his face. “It hurts me when you ignore my feelings.”

“What you’re feeling is not out of love, Mr. Byun. You need me here because I have powers like yours. And you think that you could figure out an escape. It’s not happening. Not to me, and not you, too.”

“And you look perfectly fine with it. You got it under control. Must be fun watching me suffering then.” Baekhyun retorted.

“As far as I am concerned, I wouldn’t be your personal doctor if I am a sadistic person. Now, please. Eat your medication.”

Baekhyun obliged, opening his mouth as the doctor place the pills in and swallow it as fast as he could, the bitterness ignored. It resembles his core, bitter and hard. His ivory eyes waits for the doctor’s diagnosis.  

“You’re in stage 3.” Baekhyun eyes widened. The doctor continues in a mono-tone as if it is a normal thing to say. “Stage 3 involves hallucinating, mood swings and… it affects your limbs, started with your arms.”

Baekhyun chuckled, laughing at the cold world. “First, it’s the never ending pain of the head. Stage 1 feels like and here’s stage 2, the bleeding of my wrists. It’s like a death cycle, except that I am not dying. Now I’m seeing things that shouldn’t be there.”

The doctor reached out to hold his arm, finding any way to comfort him. “Stage 3 comes with mixed emotions. It explains nonexistence memory that you witness. The made up memory come and go as it please, just as much as your bleeding wrists. If, with no control, you’ll end up in stage 4.”

“Stage 4 is already surfacing. I can feel it.” Again, Baekhyun fills the silence with a sobbing laugh. He is on the verge of crying but that would show how pathetic he is. He didn’t ask for it. He was born with a fate that seems like a punishment rather than a blessing. That explains his hidden existence in the Byun’s.

“Now, if you’ll excuse me. Mr. Park awaits your wake for hours, Mr. Byun.”

Baekhyun nodded and the doctor left, leaving nothing behind except a pray for recovery. The door open to reveal a tall auburn haired man in his suits, looking gorgeous than he intended. Except that his face wears a wary look for a friend, or was it pure sympathy for a stranger?

Chanyeol smiled, faint and sad. He sauntered into the room, grab a chair by the study desk and settle in front of Baekhyun’s bed. For a moment, they sat in silence. Baekhyun wished he could fiddle with the sheets, if only his limbs obeyed him.

“Baekhyun.” Chanyeol cleared his throat, earning the attention of the male on the bed. “How are you feeling?”

“Do you want an honest answer or a blatant lie?”

Chanyeol tilt his head. “Anything to make me stop worrying.”

“Then I am fine.”

“That’s good to know.” Chanyeol lean back, shoulder relaxed though his face still wears the tension that resemble the atmosphere of the room.

Baekhyun gaze down at the crumpled sheets, unable to find words. Tears are forcing its way down his cheeks but he was too egoistical to show how broken he is. Chanyeol is not someone he is willing to show his weak side. That would mean being… . to someone he barely know.

“Stop it.” Chanyeol breaks him from his dark thoughts. Baekhyun lifted his head again, but refused to stare at his eyes.

“You’re making your brick of wall again, Baekhyun. I thought you voluntarily pulled the bricks out but I was wrong. It makes you exposed to your vulnerability. Now you’re creating steels in between the gap, making it difficult for me to break in again.”

Chanyeol lean close, hands pressed on Baekhyun’s. “I want to understand, Baekhyun. Your pain, your smiles, your passion for Myosotis. It’s driving me insane, to memorize all the shades of your eyes. And your pale ivory eyes is what I fear the most. It tells me nothing. Please, talk to me.”

“You’re an observant, Mr. Park. You should’ve seen it all, even without me telling.”

Chanyeol retreated, caught by surprise. “Well, I wouldn’t act this way if only I have a slight idea but no, Baekhyun. No, I don’t know anything.”

“And you call yourself a therapist?” Baekhyun scoffed.

 “You have no idea how distraught I am to hear about your condition.” Concerns imprinted along Chanyeol’s words. “I am glad the maids called. I came here as soon as I could, cancelling few appointments and I get to see Jongdae’s gaping face as I rushed out of the office.”

“Mr. Kim must be surprised. You should’ve told him that there’s nothing between us.” The therapist smirked and Baekhyun proceed, “You’re a very complicated person, Mr. Park.”

“And why is that?”

Baekhyun narrowed his eyes and pursed his lips. “Your mind is all about Minjoo and Hyemi but your heart… It doesn’t make sense. I guess this is the effect of erasing memories. There are no updates made to the heart and the mind, making it a complete mess.”

Chanyeol laughed his hearty laugh, breaking the tension of the room. “I don’t even know what’s wrong with me.”

Baekhyun raised an eyebrow. “And here I thought you need a healthy mind for your patients.”

Chanyeol lean back on his seat, flashing a satisfied smile. “Not when your boss is your best friend. So I have great connections to keep me from begging for food.”

“You really don’t care what people think, do you? You’re a mess.” Baekhyun shakes his head in disbelief.

“You’ve seen me... you know what’s running in my mind right now, Baekhyun.” With that, Chanyeol deliberately hold Baekhyun’s hands, squeezing it a little. “What do you see?”

Baekhyun scowled before he inhale, releasing it calmly while he closes his eyes. Memories filled with Park Chanyeol and his family plays like a movie. The colors was jagged but there was enough to distinguish what’s new and what’s not.

His ivory eyes searched for certain memories, burying him deep inside Chanyeol’s moving pasts. And there it was, right at the corner like a sobbing child, Baekhyun could see the therapist’s dark world.

He couldn’t tell how old Chanyeol is, but he knew he was less than a decade old based on his smaller fra