• DARA •

 

"Dara, did your Aunt ever happen to have a daughter?"

 

My eyes widen as I stare back at chaerin. "What are you talking about?"

 

chaerin gently takes my arm and pulls me closer, her lips brushing against my ear. "I found this photograph-" sHe begins but I cut her off.

 

"Not here." I take her hand and lead her outside, leaving sam and tiffany alone.

 

Once in the parking lot, I turn to face chaerin. "What photograph did you find?"

 

sHe sighs. "Your sister has this photograph. I thought it was just her...but..." sHe runs a hand through her hair. "It was a picture of your Aunt back in the day. bom and her... They look exactly alike."

 

I don't know what to say, so I just blink. Speechless. How is it possible that bom unnie looks just like Aunt Su-hyun? Aunt says bom unnie might had been adopted and I have no knowledge of Aunt ever having or losing a baby.

 

"I'm gonna go talk to her." I blurt, referring to Aunt . I begin to head towards tiffany's car when chaerin grabs my arm, pulling me back.

 

"That's tiffany's car. You don't have a ride and I'm sure sam and tiff don't want to leave just yet." chaerin points of matter-of-factly. I frown. "Well, them I'll guess I'll call a cab." I say, slipping my cellphone out of my pocket. chaerin heaves a sigh. "It doesn't all have to be rushed, dara. You can find out tomorrow."

 

"But I don't want too." My voice comes out a little more sternly than I intend it too. "I need it now." I slammed my phone to my ear, already having the cab company on speed dial.

 

chaerin doesn't say anything. I can tell by the look on her face that she isn't too proud of my current actions. I ignore it.

 

"I need a cab." I say the minute a man picks up the phone. I give him the address and he tells me he'll send a cab right over. I hang up and turn away from chaerin, staring out at the street with thousands of thoughts running through my head.

 

"You're too impatient, dara." chaerin breaks the silence. "But I can go with you if you want-"

 

"No," I snap. "This is my problem."

 

"Our problem." sHe repeats for the second time today. "I'm not letting you go through this alone."

 

"You're leaving tomorrow. I'm going through it alone anyways." I inform her sourly.

 

sHe's silent for a while before speaking again. "I don't want to go and I wouldn't if you didn't want me too. But if you do, then I guess I have no reason to stay here."

 

I don't respond and I hear her turn and walk away towards the bowling alley, the sound of her shoes faintly disappearing.

 

I feel a tear roll down my cheek and I catch it with my index finger, roughly brushing it away.

 

My life is falling apart piece by piece.

 

And I don't know what to do to stop it.

 

• • •

 

The cab drops me off and I make my way into the house, findin my Aunt asleep by the tv. She looks innocent and peaceful, unaware of the world around her.

 

I walk over and take a seat beside her, gently shaking her shoulder. She stirs, her eyes inching open.

 

"dara?" She yawns and sits up, rubbing at her eyes. Her brown hair is messed up and she looks tired.

 

"Sorry to wake you." I mumble. "But I have something important to ask you."

 

Aunt stretches out her arms. "What is it?

 

Aren't you supposed to be out with sam, chaerin, and tiffany?"

 

I simply shake my head and ask her the question that's been eating me up alive for the past hour. "Aunt Su-hyun...did you by any chance ever have a daughter?"

 

My questions stuns her. The look on her face is obvious. She bites her lip and looks away, staying silent.

 

"Aunt Su-hyun, answer me!" I beg. "It's important." When she looks back at me, tears are swimming in her eyes. She slowly nods.

 

"I was young." She begins. "I met a guy and we fell madly in love. Neither of our families approved of our relationship. We went our separate ways, no matter how much it hurt us both. About a month later, I find out I'm pregnant with his baby." My Aunt's voice breaks but she keeps going. "I wanted to have it but my family was against it. At last, they let me have it. I wanted that baby so much, you see. But the day I went into labor...the day I finally had the baby...I woke up and..." She begins to sob, burying her face in her hands. "My father told me she had died. My baby girl died as I was giving birth." She sniffles and looks back up, wiping tears off her face. "I refuse to have any babies ever since."

 

I don't realize I have tears in my eyes as well until I feel one slide down my cheek and onto my lip. I it away. It's salty.

 

"What if..." I glance around the room for nothing in particular. "What if your father lied?" My voice comes out in a whisper. "What if you had the baby but he just...never told you since he didn't approve of it?"

 

Aunt stares at me with wide eyes. "That can't be possible, what are..." She shakes her head. "What are you trying to say, dara?"

 

"I think..." I chew on my lip. "chaerin and I..." I surprise myself by even mentioning chaerin. I guess I felt guilty not giving her credit for finding out what she did. "chaerin and I think that maybe your daughter...your daughter is..." I in a deep breath. "We think your daughter is bom unnie."

 

A gasp escape Aunt lips while a different voice squeals.

 

"What?"

 

I turn around to find bom unnie standing in the doorway, her eyes wide.

 

"Unnie!" I stand up, not knowing what to say.

 

"It can't be possible." Aunt blurts, standing up as well. "It just can't be."

 

I look at bom unnie. "chaerin told me about the photograph." I told her. "That's what gave me, us, the idea. You guys look way too alike. It's very possible-"

 

"But it can't be!" Aunt almost shouts. "My baby died! Father wouldn't lie!"

 

"I just found out that my mother was never my mother and I have no idea who the hell my real mother is!" My voice is louder than I intend. "I was lied too and maybe you were too."

 

bom unnie walks over to us, her lip trembling. "My sister has a point." She manages. "Maybe, maybe we should take a DNA test, you know, to confirm it."

 

Aunt nods as she wipes salty tears from her eyes. "Right. You're both right. I just can't believe..." She shakes her head. "I'm in denial." She admits, taking a seat back down on the couch.

 

"We all are." I whisper, no one hearing it but me.

 

"We'll go in the morning." bom unnie says to Aunt

 

. "Right now, I'm dead tired. Sleep is my only priority."

 

Aunt chuckles and leans back on the couch. "Agreed."

 

I smile to myself seeing how alike they were even though I never noticed until now. They both have brown hair and light brown eyes, the same body figure, and almost all the same tastes. I wouldn't be surprised if their DNA test came out positive.

 

"I think I'm going to bed too." I tell them before heading up the stairs and flopping down on the bed.

 

I was glad to have gotten that over with. I'm just eager for them to take the DNA test. I want to know the results.

 

Suddenly realization hits me.

 

If Aunt Su-hyun is bom unnie mother, then unnie had a family. Me? I have no real family. My father's dead hell knows what happened to my real mother. My life is truly messed up. I don't even know how I ended up with this family. But part of me is glad I did. Aunt su-hyun was like a mother to me and bom unnie will always be my sister no matter what. sam is my brother from another mother and Karen, sam's mom, is like Aunt Su-hyun, a mother to me. I guess I did have a family if I think about it. And I love them. I love them all.

 

"dara?" My bedroom door creaks open to reveal . chaerin I'm surprised to see her. I thought she was still at the bowling alley with sam and tiff.

 

"Where's sam and tiff?" I question, not even telling she could come in.

 

"Outside." sHe shrugs and steps into my room without bothering for permission. sHe takes a seat on my bed and just stares at me in silence for a while.

 

"What do you want, CL?" I say at last. sHe looks down, her eyes focused on the pattern on my bedsheet as she speaks. "All I can think about is how I'm leaving tomorrow. Without you. But I don't want to leave without you." sHe looks back up, her deep brown eyes searching mine. "I love you, dara."

 

I gulp, trying hard to contain myself and not break down. Something about the way she was looking at me made it hard for me not to kiss her then and there.

 

"I love you too." I wanted to say, but I don't. Instead, I say: "I'm sorry, chae."

 

sHe simply nods and stands up, getting the message. Before she leaves, she throws me a sympathetic look, gently closing the door behind her.

 

I stare at the doorknob for what seemed like ages, and when I look away... I start to cry. I bury my face in my pillow to muffle my sobs as I cry about everything going on. About my parents. About Aunt Su-hyun. About bom unnie . About myself. About all the lies. About chaerin.

 

I just lay there and cry until I eventually fall asleep, but I find myself crying in my dreams as well.