Iccy and her Leader Oppa... Maybe wishes do come true by PearlGreenMama

She was two years old when Iccy first saw Kim Hyun Joong wearing the Pooh Suit in WGM. I was then of course following the said reality show because of Wuri Leader. When my daughter Iccy chanced upon KHJ, she was mesmerized and she said Mom why would a man with a face like that hide in a bear suit?Oh yes she was two years old at that time but she has the eye for beauty and then something beautiful started three years ago.

Iccy suddenly wanted to watch all my files of KHJ and got all hooked up listening to SS501's "Dejavu." Her lullaby every night was "In your smile" and she cried buckets of tears when she saw and heard Black Glasses by Eru and KHJ. The first song my Iccy ever recorded and sang was "Hoshizora" then went on to sing "Snow Prince," danced the crossed leg step of LLT and fangirled over "Love Yah."

As she grows older her love for her Leader Oppa grew along with her. She's very sensitive when it comes to KHJ, she can easily tell if something's not right about him. I can still very well remember how she reacted and got a littl giddy when she saw KHJ's Lecoq's photoshoot alongside SS501. She saw a very weak and tired KHJ. That time BOF just finished and KHJ had cf's and tv guestings one after the other and had no time to rest and recuperate (he had accidents and had fainted during BOF). Iccy was quick to point out that KHJ looked so sick and in near collapse. I thought my God my daughter saw that and knew something was wrong? But you see something was definitely wrong at that time. What I didn't tell her was the Lecoq clips that she watched that time was actually a news clip about KHJ fainting spells  during the photoshoot. She was dead right and she knew something was amiss.

When KHJ was down with the H1N1 virus, it was Iccy who told me not to worry because she said she was friends with God and that she will pray for his quick recovery. She was worried but she trust God that He will protect her Leader. Iccy nagged me to do an mv on her behalf about Leader getting sick and getting well and that she will pray for him. That mv was reposted to various sites and forums and was posted and translated at PERFECT too.

At first for Iccy KHJ was her fiancee, I can't even fangirled over him without me getting the weird look from her, lols! But as the years go by, KHJ was not the fiancee anymore. When I asked her where's Wuri Leader in her heart, she will just shrugged her shoulders and smile. Then I asked her another sets of questions. I asked her what is YS to her, she said "YS is my daddy, looked we both have dimples." What about Kyujong Oppa, she said " Kyu is my crush!" Then I went on to ask her about Jungmin Oppa, she quickly answered that JM Oppa is her bestfriend and Maknae Oppa is her older brother. Then I thought where is KHJ in her heart so I asked her once again, "Iccy where is Leader Oppa in your heart?" My dear girl looked me liked she was scolding me and said,"Mama don't you get it? Leader Oppa was all four of them in my heart!"

I was bawled over by her answer, why didn't I think of  that?  KHJ was the first man other than her father that sparked her interest, and so KHJ's her brother, her father, her crush and her bestfriend. Such a wonderful darling and an intelligent one.

With the recent developments that had happened within our family, as much as I as their mother wanted protect them from the hurt I felt I was a failure. A family must be complete, a mother, a father and children and GOD amidst all of us. But it turned out that one person is missing and I have to proetct my children from the pain of it.

A father is important as air and water to us... Circumstances beyond my control happened and it was an ugly one. And the most painful part of it was that my children was caught in between and was hurt the most. Angel, my eldest was the daddy's girl simply because she was our only daughter for 7 years when I got pregnant with Iccy once again and dear Iccy was the apple of our eyes because she's the youngest. And she's the one who misses her father the most.

She grew up never seeing her dad, when he went abroad, she was just 4 months old and when he came back, Iccy was then 2. They spent 3 months of bonding moment until the time he went back abroad and that was the last time she saw her dad. The pain in my daughter's eyes were unbearable. She often asked about her dad, I don't even know how to respond to that. How can I tell her that me and her dad are no longer together?

But thankfully Playfull Kiss came in our way, as we fangirled over Baek Seung Jo, I slowly broke the news to her, gently and very carefully I tried to tell her certian things about me and her father. She did cry because I know she understood every words I told her, it may not be the straight and blunt words but just enough for her to understand our situation.

Then she asked me pointblank, "Will Leader Oppa leave us too?" Then I assured her that Leader Oppa never abandoned his fans especially the children. Iccy smiled and said, "Then I will be okay."

Of course in truth my babies are not okay, with an absentee dad and me working far from them, they can only take as much. Angel vent her frustrations into sports and studies. She graduated with honors and awards, my little girl harnessed her singing talent and went on to sing a lot of Tagalog and Lady Gaga songs. My children were so mature at their age, I am blessed to have them.

And then the news of KHJ's Hi5 event came, I thought will Iccy be able to see her crush brother daddy bestfriend in person? So I started to plan and asked for Apple's help. You see Apol lived in Pampanga like me and she already went to our place and knew my parents. I asked her if she can be Iccy's guardian and take care of her during the event. My parents agreed to the set up and so did Apple. It's the first step for Iccy to see her idol in person.

As a mother, this is the only thing I can do for her at this moment, I know deep in her heart that she misses her dad but seeing her Leader Oppa will help with her pain. That's the magic of Kim Hyun Joong, he might not know it but he always had this impact among us and my Iccy was no exemption.

He sparked her interest when she was two years old and the fire didn't burnt out but kept on burning up to this day. I know Iccy will have the time of her life when she will finally see her favorite man... her Leader Oppa.

Of course when I told her that she will be in Trinoma, she shrieked  like a banshee over the phone and ran around the house, that's so typical of her when she's excited. And I could just imagine her ran towards her bedroom and made the hi5 on Jesus Christ's picture frame. That's her way of saying thanks to God!

In more ways than one, KHJ helped my Iccy go though this difficult phase, of course with the guidance of my parents and my constant calls to her and to Angel, it was KHJ that she looked up to the most. It was hard for her but she always make it through. She's one tough kid that's why I made a promise to myself that she will definitely see her idol come hell or high water.

This is the only thing I can do for her, she didn't asked for much just a glimpse but maybe God will shine upon my little girl and will give her more than she had asked for.

She asked me to make  August Christmas for her and who am I to say no at her.^^


And so I ask and pray for God to make my little girl's simple wish do come true. With tears in my eyes as I write this, I know even small miracles can happen and the miracle of my Iccy seeing her beloved Leader Oppa can be one step away from becoming true.

Help me pray for this...

(And on that faithful day, the simple wish did come true...and Hyun Joong and Iccy had a moment together, where time seemed to stop for Iccy when she was with her Leader Oppa.)

Writer's Note: I wish to share a friend's note about her child, and she gave her permission to post it here in AFF.

The last line is my addition to the post, and she did meet Kim Hyun Joong.