I know jagi that I didn't write a lot on the past few chapters because I don't really have anything to say about it. But now it's the time for the present. 

 

Dear my jagiyah. 

 

The first time I met you was like a little twist in my life. I changed my perspective that all men are just using women, which made me develop a mindset of being independent and kinda... dominant (?). But somehow, after meeting you, my whole life and point of view started to change. I was able to learn I was generalizing men too much, and there are men out there who are different from most of them. And the MAN that I was talking about is you jagiyah. 

I know that my first impression of you wasn't that great, I thought that you were just a flirt. Since you were handsome, so I thought why not play along be in a possible loveless relationship. 

But I was wrong. So so wrong.

I never thought that I could open my doors to you. (Don't think it in a weird way, it's heart okay. Heart.) and able to show you my true self. I didn't know that I will turn so soft, so vulnerable and madly in love with a man ever. But you came and untwist my knot.

I realised that we fell in love so fast, get into relationship fast and... get.../censors/ faster than the two. But it doesn't change my feelings for you. No matter if we dated a week later, a month later after we met. My feelings and my desire of wanting to stay by your side will never cease.

I know that we went through a lot of fights. From you trying to get me jealous, me asking you the most stupid things that trigger your anger, to our fight due to missing each other so much.

I admit, that there are times that I got really annoyed at you, mad at you and sad because of you, but those negative feelings will never block my feelings for you. My love for you will always grow bigger not turning smaller.

I know that even though you told me how much you love me, and that you will stay with me forever, I will still have small insecurities. I hope that I can get over them soon.

I love you so much jagiyah, that every single thing that you do attract my attention. So don't ever think that I never pay attention to you, I do. But quietly. I wasn't good in expressing my feelings and you are aware of that. And the fact that you understood and still love me made me fell even deeper in love with you.

I sometimes wonder "I keep falling deep for him, will it ever stop?"

I kinda know the answer though. And it's a "No"

I will always still love you, no matter what happen, even if you turn old and wrinkly, even if you have your bad traits. I will always stay with you.

Except if you cheat on me then it's a different story.

Oh yeah, Mister. Don't forget that I do get jealous at times and just recently but I'm not gonna say anything. shh.

Jagi, I know that I annoy you a lot, make you ad and especially sad. But will you put up with this annoying stupid girl? She desperately wants all your love and attention and she promise that if you stay with her, she will give you as much chicken she has, all of her love and attention and also... the dirty things buried deep in her mind that she couldn't wait to try it on you.

I know that this is all over the place but just continue reading okay?

I know that for the past few days I couldn't get a lot of time with you during the weekdays and you're getting busy, but my only wish that we will stay together, going online for each other and talk to each other. I know I will miss you like dead and I hope that you won't get cold or bored of me. I will be very very very sad and hurt if that happens.

I know your dream girl is a girly girl, innocent, and affectionate. Totally opposite of me. 

I'm grateful that you do accept me as whoever I am. Even though I'm not slightest bit girly, not liking flowers might show how ungirly I am. I'm also not innocent judging from my love for por- okay.  Affectionate.. maybe in pm. 

But I'm happy. 

Happy that you accepted me as who I am. 

I wondered sometimes, what did I ever do to claim this perfect man's heart? 

I know that I'm not stupid enough to break it jagiyah. 

You're the first and the only man that I will love as much as this. 

And I know that this will continue on till forever. 

 

I will forever love you jagi. 

 

 

P.S. Happy monthsary and I hope that our love will stay forever until the rest of our lives jagi. I love you