8th February 2014 

8th February, marks the time where I met someone that I didn't think would change my life forever. He was everything that I asked for. True, like any normal person, you would be attracted by that handsome face of his. The first time I met him, I only had one motif of having fun in a not so serious relationship, but little did I know I was brought deeper into what motif was. 

Every 'slow' step that couples usually do during a relationship was different to us. One slice at a time, symbolising one further step into the relationship felt like as if we ate the whole cake together in one go. 

It was that fast. 

Even I was surprised myself. 

What was I doing? 

I thought to myself. 

But it was fun, so why not? 

But those little steps that we took felt like an easy decision of buying a new gum or not. 

 

Oh, I remember clearly in my head. I talked to him like the biggest idiot I really was, somehow able to predict the future that a man this handsome won't even overlook me. 

But damn, I was wrong, and I was happy about it. 

He called me cute, and the feeling was good. He somehow encouraged me to act the way I always act to him, which is.. stupidity. 

But it was fun. 

He accepted me as who I am. 

When I remember about our past, I suddenly had a thought that it was me that confessed first. 

That was a first time I confessed to a man. 

I remembered that he looked surprised at my sudden confession, but he softened up and accepted me anyway with "Yah, I'm supposed to be the one to say that" 

I felt manly, but pfft. 

Then of course, we became a couple with me replying "There was no rule saying that women can't confess" unofficially 

 

I remembered my first impression of this man, I thought that he was a player and I was fine with it. Since I didn't think that I will fall for him deeply despite my confession. 

But I was so wrong as my time was spent with him. 

So so wrong. 

He had a high drives when we first talked. But I didn't say that I don't have one as well. 

However, he was the sweetest man I know. The gentlest and the most loving that I nearly cried when I thought about it again. 

I knew that he priotise me, and I like the feeling, of trusting. 

 

9th February 2014

In the afternoon, I remembered him coming over my house and presented me this flowers. 

Cute I thought. 

I forgot to tell him that I didn't like flowers at that time. Shh.. now the secrets is unfolded. 

But since I met him, I started to like flowers. 

Oh wells, continue on. 

He said that he will be going on a date, it sounded exciting so I obliged. 

And his drives still hasn't changed. 

But I love it so much I sometimes want to turn back time to see him so . Yes M rated here. 

I remembered from my short term memory that we went to the haunted house right after I told him that I'm a at it. Yes we did something there. So good. 

Hm, after that horrifying haunted house (Thank God we got over that), I remembered that he brought me to this villa by the beach. So gorgeous and calm. My type. 

We went inside and he claimed that it was his grandparents'. It was nice. 

For the whole day, we seemed to be sitting side by side on the beach alone, sharing kisses to each other. That was the moment where I truly fell deeply for him. 

But when a question escaping his lips, travelling to my ears and made me think like I was doing a maths question "What are we?" 

Of course, being a stupid, insensitive girl I was, I replied "Unofficially dating" 

I didn't know that those 2 words will hurt him. 

That was the first time I saw him hurt, or I've hurt someone that gave me a tinge of pain in my heart. 

It made me sad. 

It made me panic.  

It made me want to punch myself, surely. 

All rounds of first time feeling started to wash into me, until I realise that I truly love him. 

Then, the second confession escaped my lips again. 

Now, we are finally, boyfriend and girlfriend.

And we both were happy. 

 

---

 

I remembered one time when we were spending time in your grandparents villa. You told me to call you this common nickname used within couples 'Babe'. 

It sounded like an alien language to me. 

'babe' 

Series of thoughts started to go in my brain. 

Why do couples have to call each other with that name? 

Don't they have a name or is that an excuse if they have forgotten their names? 

I remembered that I was a counter-sweet girlfriend. I would refuse and try to ignore anything that has anything to do with cheesiness and sweetness. Even 'I love you' was hard for me to say. 

But since the day I met this man, everything started to change. 

'Babe' felt like a natural word for me, more natural than cusses and insulting words that I let out to other people normally. 

'I love you' felt like an everyday words for me. 

Sweetness became my middle name, somehow. 

But.. I felt that this wasn't enough and that I wanted to do more. 

 

 

And I know that he's going to read this soon. And this is a message for you, I love you babe.