A/N: WARNING: This chapter contains a dream scene involving a lot of blood, but no gore. If you want to skip it, I've marked the beginning and end with three forward dash marks!

While the other men finished their breakfast, Minseok was pacing in his room, trying to work out the puzzle that was Yifan.

The younger man had always taken his position as leader very seriously, and was hesitant to show any emotion he perceived as weak. The problem was that he was very hypocritical about that rule, in Minseok's eyes.

Yifan would never tell another member that what they were feeling made them weak or pathetic, ever. Yet he thought that he had to hide himself from the others so they couldn't see his 'weaknesses'.

It made Minseok very sad, to think about Yifan struggling through anything alone.

It was no secret that Minseok had a bit of a crush on Yifan. How could he not? He was handsome, and responsible and sweet. But he was so critical of himself, so obsessed with being strong and immovable, it made Minseok yearn to see the happy, confidant Yifan that he knew from years past.

Minseok fell back onto his bed, his head in his hands.

All he wanted was for Yifan to let him in, to let him help.

Well, if Minseok was anything, it was tenacious. He'd find a way to get Yifan to trust him, no matter how long it took. 

Meanwhile, at the end of the hall, Yifan was in much the same position as the elder.

He was sitting on the floor beside his bed, leaning back against the mattress with his hands clenched tight in his hair.

He took long, gasping breaths to calm himself down, his chest heaving with the force of them. He didn't have panic attacks often, and this was the first in a while. Because of this, it was hitting him especially hard. 

His toes were curled in his socks and his knees were pulled up to his ears. His anxiety was heightened by the fact that Jongdae could walk in at any moment and see him in such a pitiable state.

With that thought he finally calmed himself down, not willing to let himself be seen in such a vulnerable position.

He wiped the sweat off his brow and stood slowly on shaky legs, coughing to clear the lump in his throat.

He slipped into his shoes before checking himself in the mirror, making sure he didn't look too disheveled.

Him and the other M members had a dance rehearsal today to prepare for an up coming concert tour, and he had to get himself together before they left.

Fifteen minutes later everyone was ready and heading to the car. Yifan didn't make eye contact with anyone, and was silent the whole way to the studio.

~~~

Six hours later, Minseok and the others were walking into the dorm, more confused and worried than before.

Yifan had been... not himself, during practice. He was normally one of the most dedicated during rehearsal, keeping everyone pumped up and energetic.

This time, however, he had been practically silent the whole time, only speaking when asked a direct, yes or no question. He had also stumbled multiple times during his dance solo, once even falling so hard the instructor wanted to call the hospital.

But Yifan had just waved him off and limped back to his spot, still silent.

Minseok was beyond worried now. Yifan was hurting, and he wouldn't let anyone help ease the pain. Minseok was almost angry at him.

Why was he so stubborn? Why didn't he think he was worth the help?

Minseok sighed as he fell onto his mattress for the second time that day. He could hear Zitao behind him, sitting on his own bed quietly.

"Minseok-ssi?" Zitao sounded hesitant. Minseok turned his face to him.

"Are you worried about Yifan hyung?"

Zitao looked contrite, and was staring down at his clasped hands as he waited for Minseok to answer.

"Very much, yes."

Zitao let out a relieved breath and finally made eye contact. His eyes were wet with tears.

"Me too. Why won't he let us help him?"

Zitao sounded so young right then, so confused, and Minseok sympathized with him. He and Yifan were very close, and Zitao felt a sort of hero worship towards him.

"It's just who he is, I guess." Minseok reburied his head in his crossed arms, unwilling to speak anymore.

He heard Zitao sigh and exit the room, hopefully to go try and knock some sense into Yifan.

~~~

Dinner that night was a subdued affair. 

The six men sat quietly at the kitchen island, eating microwaved ramen and white bread. It was a quick, filling meal that they had eaten a lot in their time spent training with SM.

All eyes were on the tallest of their group, who sat silently poking at his food. 

Jongdae and Lu Han were trying to hold a conversation to raise spirits, but nobody else participated. They soon fell silent.

Yifan felt the weight of all the eyes on him, and they made him nervous. He tried to make it look like he was actually eating, when really he was just pushing it around the bowl. He hadn't eaten a full meal in almost a month now, a little while after the nightmares started.

The thought of eating made his stomach turn unpleasantly, and the weight loss was starting to be noticeable.

The eyes watching him were making him sweat, and his sweatshirt was starting to be stifling. 

He couldn't do this much longer.

"I'm gonna go to bed."

Yifan stood up from his stool and deposited his still full bowl in the sink before leaving. 

Minseok dropped his napkin on top of his empty bowl, sighing in exasperation. It was hardly seven o' clock, and he knew for a fact that Yifan was having trouble sleeping recently. He had a suspicion that that was where all of his problems were stemming from, and he wanted to test it out.

He just had to wait.

~~~

Jongdae had gone to sleep two and a half hours ago, and Yifan was just lying there, counting his roommate's breaths.

He was so scared to fall asleep, but he was so, so tired.

He had never felt so exhausted before. His body was just shutting down, causing his limbs to become heavy and his eyelids to droop.

He didn't know what he'd do if these nightmares kept up. He had been trying to remain  optimistic about everything, but he hadn't been able to rest peacefully for so long.

Closing his eyes, Yifan's last thought before falling asleep was how he couldn't take much more of this.

///

When he next opened his eyes, it was to a familiar darkness.

His head felt liked it was stuffed with heavy cotton, and his fingers and toes prickled with pins and needles.

He took an experimental step forward, only to find that his limbs felt restrained, like his wrists and ankles were tied to strings that were keeping him upright.

Before he could panic, though, he was presented with another image.

He saw Zitao standing about twenty feet away from him, stock still and surrounded by soft yellow light. 

Yifan felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up in apprehension. Nothing good would come of this.

Slowly, Jongdae and Lu Han appeared on either side of him, like they were emerging from a pool of water. Next were Yixing and Minseok. Then Joonmyun and Kyungsoo. After a while, every member of the group was standing before him, silently watching him with expressionless faces.

Yifan's heart was racing by then, worried for his friends. He took a step forward, straining hard against his invisible bonds. He kept struggling forward, getting to within a few feet of the other men.

Just as he was about to reach out and try to shake one of them out if their stupor, he was yanked back. Hard.

He flew back to where he had been originally, landing hard on his back, jarring his bones.

He was full blown panicking by the time he had stood back up. 

Zitao was holding open his jacket, revealing a plain white t-shirt beneath.

A white t-shirt that was slowly becoming red.

Crimson was blossoming across the white fabric stretched across his chest. It spread out to the neckline and continued to travel downwards until his whole abdomen was soaked.  

By the time it had started to drip off the hem, all of the others had revealed similar red patches, all over their bodies.

Jongin had blood dripping down from his hair line, trailing down his face and onto his shirt in thin, skewed lines. Chanyeol had bright red streaks all over his clothes, and more flowed from his ears and down his neck.

The last to bleed was Minseok.

He had opened his mouth to release a flood of bright red blood, flowing down his chest and splashing onto the floor in obscene amounts. His eyes were trained directly on Yifan's as he stood motionless, his clothes sagging with the weight of all the fluid.

Yifan couldn't watch this, he wouldn't. He ran forward full tilt, trying to save his friends.

But the restraints kept yanking him back.

And his friends continued to bleed.

///

Waking up was like being splashed with ice cold water.

Yifan was gasping and shivering, soaked with sweat and tangled in his sheets.

His heart was beating so fast he could feel it in his temples. He thrashed about for a moment to free himself from his blankets before shooting out of bed.

He jumped the two steps over to Jongdae's bed, holding his breath.

He was fine, sleeping heavily with his hands fisted beneath his head.

Next was Yixing and Lu Han's room. Yifan sprinted in, barely managing to keep the door from slamming into the wall. Yixing was contorted into a strange position that a less flexible man would find agonizing, but he was sleeping soundly. Lu Han was sprawled on top of his duvet and snoring fitfully.

Both safe.

Then there was Zitao and Minseok.

Minseok was sleeping on his side, his hands gripping the blanket that he had pulled to underneath his chin.

He looked so childlike, safe and snug in his bed, that Yifan almost had trouble turning to the next occupant of the room.

Zitao was sleeping curled up beneath his duvet, a small smile curling the corners of his lips as he dreamed. He was perfectly safe, they were all perfectly safe.

The relief he felt threatened to crush him.

He pressed a balled up fist to his lips to hold back a sob. He couldn't take his eyes off of Zitao's peacefully sleeping face, scared that if he did his nightmare would come true.

For several minutes he stood there, watching his friend's chest rise and fall.

He left when the tears spilled over.

~~~

Minseok was startled awake at eleven forty five that night, having heard what sounded like pounding feet in the hallway. He'd pretended to be asleep whenever someone burst into his room, scared and sleep-addled.

He opened his eyes when he heard quiet crying from the intruder.

Yifan was standing over by Zitao's bed, his hand pressed to his mouth as his shoulders shook with silent, wracking sobs. 

Minseok stayed still, wanting to get a clue as to what was going on in Yifan's head.

But he didn't get one. 

As soon as the tears started to chase each other down Yifan's cheeks, he was gone. He left so quickly that Minseok wasn't even sure the whole ordeal hadn't just been a strange dream.

But he was sure, because the image of strong, willful Yifan silently crying in the middle of the night was going to stay with him for a long time. 

A/N: Whoo! Three chapters down! This chap seemed a little rushed to me, what do you guys think? Anyways, next update will have xiuris cuddles!!! Comment below with thoughts, feelings or questions!