“This boy would be happy just to love you.” Jongup said before picking up his coffee cup and taking a tentative sip. By the look on his face, it was too hot and too bitter for him still. Junhong never understood why he tried to like that . “He’s a ing sap and a hopeless romantic.”

                “Someone sounds a little bitter.” Junhong laughed as Jongup angrily put down his cup.

                “Gee, I wonder why.”

                Jongup was talking about a long time crush that had the name of Daehyun, who he had confessed to a while back and then fooled around with him for a little bit until Daehyun fessed up he was just using him to get closer to Junhong.

                “He’s cute and tall.” Daehyun explained to a quivering lipped Jongup as they sat down by the park fountain. “Don’t get me wrong Jongup. If he wasn’t in the picture, I’d be all over you, but-“

                And that was the moment Jongup slapped Daehyun right across the face and up and left. He ran to Junhong, God only knows why, and spilled out his heart to him, and now they were sitting at a coffee shop, discussing what Junhong should do.

                “If you don’t think you’ll be comfortable seeing up being affectionate to one another, I’m not going to pursue it. I already told you, I’m not particularly interested in him but it wouldn’t hurt to have a boyfriend before I die.” Junhong said over a steady murmur of people passing by. Jongup rolled his eyes and took another small sip of coffee.

                “You’re not going to be alone for the rest of your life Junhong. I’m only a year older than you and-“

                “You’ve not only dated Daehyun and that one guy Himchan, but you’ve also had on more than one occasion while I haven’t even kissed anyone.” Junhong finished for him.

                “Well, Daehyun is a great kisser.” Jongup replied, lifting an eyebrow and winking. Junhong hated how white his complexion was because it was evident when he blushed and Jongup never failed to about it. “Are you thinking about his plump lips on your thin little ones?”

                “Shut up!” Junhong yelled, suppressing a giggle and hiding his face in his hands. “He seems like such and , but he’s so hot.”

                “I know, I know.” Jongup said, reaching across the table and whacking Junhong on the arm. “But he’s not all that bad. He brought me out to lunch a lot and he was gentle and caring. Like I said, he loves to love and he would love to love you.”

                Junhong thought about that. Love? Junhong loved skateboarding and frogs and certain kinds of food and sometimes his mom got on his nerves but he still loved her nonetheless. But, someone who was outside of the norm? They could love him, but could he return the feelings? He was beginning to feel a little nervous.

                “Anyways, here’s his number. Send him a text right now so I know you don’t chicken out. I want both of you to be happy. He’ll treat you well.” Jongup said, sliding over a piece of paper with sloppily scrawled digits on it.

                “What about you?” Junhong asked, picking up the paper and pulling out his phone while Jongup talked.

                “Ah, Himchan has been texting me again so I’ll crawl back to him. He’s a lot older than Daehyun but also a better lover. I’ll leave you with my sloppy seconds.” he joked. Junhong scowled, but he had just typed out a basic ‘Hello Daehyun, this is Junhong. Jongup gave me your number.’ and send it off. He had to show his friend to be sure he wasn’t lying. Moments later, Daehyun had already replied with an enthusiastic ‘Hey!’ and then went on to ask if Jongup had told him what had happened and all Junhong could reply was ‘lol yeah’.

                Smooth.

                That didn’t deter Daehyun though, who said that it was embarrassing that he had to hear it from Jongup and not from him, but Junhong assured him it was fine and that he was very flattered.

                Jongup was talking to him about something, but he was too engrossed in waiting for the next message. He relayed to Daehyun that he was currently out to coffee with the middle boy and Daehyun said he would leave him alone until his ‘date’ was over, and Junhong laughed to himself and said he could keep talking since Jongup was babbling about a new anime and he wasn’t particularly interested. Daehyun responded with ‘Are you sure? I don’t want to be a bother.’ and Junhong found himself liking Daehyun already. Jongup was right, he was a ing sap and a hopeless romantic, but Junhong was new to relationships and he found himself loving the attention. He smiled into his lap and then there was a loud thud on the table.

                “Are you even listening?” Jongup asked with a smile on his face. “Or are you already planning your wedding with Hyunnie?”

                The blush crept back and enveloped Junhong neck, face, and ears. Jongup was about to burst into laughter until Junhong’s phone buzzed and the eager teen picked up his phone and checked his new message from Daehyun. He wanted to meet after Jongup and he were done. Junhong’s hand trembled and Jongup plucked the phone right out of them and read the message.

                “So are you going to do it?” Jongup asked, and Junhong placed his hands in his lap and tugged at a stray string of fabric on his jeans.

                “I-I don’t know. Should I?” he asked, his voice small.

                Jongup was tapping around on his phone and nodded. “Well, now you don’t have a choice. You’re going to meet him right here in 15 minutes. The text is already sent, so there’s not going back now, er!” Jongup laughed, tossing the phone across the table and Junhong barely caught it with his fumbling hands.

                “You’re kidding me! Moon Jongup, you’re a ty friend!” Junhong yelled, but Jongup was putting on his coat and chugging the rest of his coffee which surely was cold by now.

                “And you’re not for feeling no guilt about taking my ex?” he asked, and before Junhong could defend himself, Jongup gave him a wink and a wave. “Good luck buddy.” he said, and he walked away, leaving Junhong to fend for himself.

                The pale boy sat alone for a while waiting for Daehyun to show up, tracing his finger around the lip of his cup. His legs were crossed tighter than usual and for some reason he could feel every fiber of fabric clinging to his skin and he had just now noticed the morning air was muggy since it rained the night before. He was nervous. Junhong’s eyes shifted back and forth hastily as he looked for any sign of the other boy. He had seen Daehyun a couple of times before when he would drop Jongup off to hang out with him. He always remembered his bright smile and Junhong blushed a little remembering his warm laugh and how it seemed to light up his body.

                He also recalled how Jongup always doted on it and that was when the first pang of guilt hit him. Was this really okay? Junhong didn’t really know Daehyun that well. He knew how he looked and he knew a couple of little things that Jongup had told him, but that was the extent of it. Junhong didn’t quite understand why Daehyun liked him anyways. He was tall, gangly, pale, and still developing. They boy felt a little ashamed of his body and then he determined that was probably why no one wanted to kiss him.

Junhong touched his lips and he, for a moment, wondered if he would be alone forever.

“If your lips are chapped, I can fix that for you.” said a voice from beside him. Startled, Junhong ended up jumping in his seat and hitting the table with his knee and making his drink spill. There was a light chuckle that followed and then a hand on his shoulder and a tube of chapstick being handed to him. “Sorry for the startle, Junhong.”

Junhong looked up with doe eyes at the person next to him. Daehyun smiled down at him and Junhong’s hands scrabbled with the chapstick Daehyun was holding out. He eventually got a hold of it and held it close to his chest while staring in his lap. Daehyun remained unmoved.

“N-no!” I’m fine. You didn’t scare me… I just wasn’t expecting you there so…”

“So I did scare you?” Daehyun asked, and Junhong smiled.

“I guess so… a-anyway, have a seat I guess. Do you want anything to drink?” the younger asked, and Daehyun nodded, motioning over a waiter and giving him his order.

Junhong began to study the way Daehyun’s lips moved when he talked and he already hated himself for wanting Daehyun to kiss him. It was hard when he was jealous that it seemed like everyone else in the world had had their first kiss with the exception of him. He shrugged and popped the cap off the chapstick and smeared his on his lips rather tactlessly. Daehyun watched him with a faint grin and Junhong smiled to himself, realizing it was an indirect kiss.

Feeling rather successful, he capped it and tentatively went to pass it back, but Daehyun put up his hand and motioned for Junhong to keep it. Grinning still, he stuffed it in his pocket and then set his hands on the table.

“So…” Junhong said, feeling a little small with the given situation. “Uh, well, should we just talk or something now?” he asked. Immediately, he regretted it when Daehyun seemed to laugh at him.

“Oh lord, Jongup was right. You really are an awkward and unexperienced kid, aren’t you?” he asked. Junhong stuttered.

“I-is it that obvious? I can get it if you don’t like me because of that. I’ve really never had a boyfriend because I’m so young and my mom doesn’t want me dating because she said it will take away from my studies. Also I haven’t really seen anyone around who I thought was attractive. But, I mean, I’m sorry?” he rambled, and Daehyun was smiling, his face full of laugh lines and he looked like a little cat with that mischievous aura about him.

“You don’t need to apologize Junhong. And would your mom be mad if your first boyfriend was four years older than you?” Daehyun asked, and Junhong felt a little more confident now as he cocked and eyebrow.

“What makes you so sure you’re going to be my boyfriend?” he asked, and Daehyun, taken off guard, just looked on at the boy before a sly smile spread across his face.

“Are you going to play hard to get, or are you just being flirtatious?”

“Both?” Junhong laughed out, unsure of how to answer, and Daehyun chuckled as his drunk and two small pastries arrived. He picked up one and then passed the plate to Junhong, who looked down at it, looked back up to Daehyun, and then looked back down at the treat again.

“For me?” he asked, going to reach for it, but Daehyun reached across the table again and pulled the plate back towards him and gave Junhong a serious look.

“No. It’s for me because I’m hungry.” he said, and Junhong let out a small “oh” before Daehyun shook his head and chuckled. “I was kidding. It is for you, Junhong.”

Junhong felt embarrassed as he let out another ‘oh’ and tentatively reached for it again, breaking off some and eating it slowly.

“God, you’re so cute.” Daehyun said aloud, and it was his turn this time to turn red as he clasped his hand over his mouth and Junhong could tell he was smiling by the way his eyes crinkled up, and he was glad Daehyun didn’t cover up his beauty mark, because that was Junhong’s favorite facial feature of his. He also really liked Daehyun’s smile and his nose too, but his beauty mark made him swoon, and he wanted to kiss it.

Junhong felt like he was obsessed with the wrong thing, because while everyone else his age was talking about how great was, he just wanted to kiss someone else and that alone he could get off to. He’d never tell anyone that though because it was embarrassing. He took another bite of the pastry and Daehyun had come down from his giggle fit.

“Sorry, that was supposed to stay in my head.” Daehyun meekly told Junhong, who smiled a little and glanced off to the side.

“It’s okay. No one has ever complimented me in a courting manner, so thank you.”

“Did you just say ‘courting’?”

“What?”

“Did you say ‘courting’?” Daehyun asked again, and Junhong slid down into his seat, pulling up his shirt over his chin and blushing again.

“Y-yeah?” he stammered back, and Daehyun just propped his elbows up on the table and put his chin into his hands and rolled his eyes.

“You’re so old fashioned.” he commented, and Junhong felt ashamed and a little angry.

“I can’t be old fashioned if this is my first date!” he snapped back, and Daehyun raised his eyebrows and smiled softly before reaching across the table and putting a hand on Junhong’ arm. Junhong went rigid.

“Hey, you don’t have to feel embarrassed or anything. I wasn’t being serious Junhong. I’ll go as slow as you need to and let me tell you, I’m just as nervous as you are.” Daehyun said, and Junhong blinked, his eyes wide and unsure of what Daehyun was getting at.

“Why are you nervous?” he asked, and Daehyun retracted his hand and ran it through his hair, sighing and then laughing.

“For one, you’re young, and I felt bad when I first got interested in you because Jongup is young too but he’s been around the block, and I don’t know what you’ve done.” Daehyun said, and Junhong guessed that meant he had to tell.

“I haven’t…done anything.” he replied and Daehyun pushed on.

“What does anything mean? Like, had , touching, grinding…?”

“I haven’t kissed anyone.” Junhong, mumbled out, but Daehyun didn’t hear him.

“Once more?” he asked, and Junhong took another bite of his pastry before just picking up the rest and shoving it into his mouth. As he chewed, he pulled out his phone and typed out ‘I haven’t kissed anyone!!! I can’t say it out loud because it’s humiliating…’ and pressed send. He looked down at the empty plate and wished there was more, especially as Daehyun checked his phone, read the message and then looked up at Junhong and grinned.

“Oh my God. You’re as innocent as they get.” Daehyun said, and Junhong swallowed his last bite and looked down into his lap, picking at a hangnail and thinking that the sharp sting he was feeling was nothing to how he felt now.

“You probably don’t like me anymore.” Junhong said. “Jongup told me no one wants to be responsible for messing up fresh snow.”’

“Well,” Daehyun said, reaching across the table again and grabbing Junhong’s hand, lacing their fingers together. “Jongup is wrong, and it’s not messing up anything as long as you make something beautiful out of it.” Daehyun said, and Junhong squeezed his hand lightly.

“Ah, but I’m not beautiful.” Junhong told him, and with his free hand, Daehyun pulled out his wallet and set down his money before he motioned for the waiter again, got his change, and tipped. Junhong noticed also he picked up his tab and then they stood up, Daehyun still holding his hand.

They began to walk, and Junhong didn’t know where to, but it was nice holding Daehyun’s hand out in the open since it seemed like no one was paying attention. He squeezed his hand again, and Daehyun looked over at him and sighed out.

“You are too beautiful, Junhong, and the minute I saw you, you took my breath away. I mean it.” Daehyun said, and Junhong couldn’t help the blush that flooded over his entire face. He felt like he was on fire by the words Daehyun had said. He looked to him, and Daehyun too looked a little embarrassed by what he had said.

“Thank you…  I guess.” Junhong mumbled back, and Daehyun nudged him a little before giving his hand yet another squeeze.

“You don’t have to be so awkward about this you know. Act like you normally would. I’m no that weird of a guy.” Daehyun told him, but the younger begged to differ.

“Jongup said you don’t like anime and you’re bad at videogames as well. He also said you can’t even ride a skateboard.”

“Jongup can’t either.” Daehyun said back, but Junhong’s eyes bore down on him, and Daehyun still thought he looked cute.

“Yeah, but if I were to act natural around you, you’d think I was really childish and I don’t want you to think lower of me.” Junhong said, and Daehyun couldn’t help but t chuckle at the boy’s worries.

“It’s okay Junhong. I won’t think you of you any less for liking things that, well, normal teenage boys like. I was always the weird kid because not only did I not enjoy anime or sports or videogames but I also didn’t like girls…” Daehyun laughed. Junhong hummed and nodded.

“I only recently realized I liked boys, so people at school don’t know yet.” he said, and Daehyun looked to him with surprise.

                “Should I not hold your hand then? In public?” he asked, and Junhong looked down at his hand safely entwined with Daehyun’s and he wondered for a couple of seconds what the kids at school would think if they caught him out on a date with someone who was old enough to be a sophomore in college. He was scared for a second, but the wanted to be seen with Daehyun almost. Daehyun was good looking, and he wouldn’t mind if people saw him with someone as gorgeous as him.

                “You can. I don’t mind it.” Junhong told him, but his palms were sweating and Daehyun looked at him with an unsure glance.

                “I’m serious here Junhong. You seem really nervous. I told you that I’ll go as slow as you need, and if holding hands is to much-“

                “Holding hands isn’t too much Daehyun. I’m not that big of a baby.” Junhong shot back, and Daehyun just laughed a little and shook his head. He was probably too young for Daehyun to pursue, but he wanted it to work out. He really liked how cute Junhong was, and he found himself looking over at the young boy a lot, who was always staring at the ground. “Where are we going?”

                Daehyun shrugged. “I was thinking my place. We can sit and watch a movie if you don’t mind.” Daehyun said, and Junhong’s head shot up and he turned to look at him with lighting speed.

                “Y-Your place?” he asked, sounding as if Daehyun had just told him they were going to the Bahamas, his treat of course. Daehyun seemed to have a light blush on his face and he nodded.

                “I-If you don’t want to go I can understand that. I mean, we can go and catch a movie in a theater but I didn’t know… I thought my place would be a little more comfortable and not to mention cheaper.” Daehyun said, and Junhong looked at him like he was the best thing that had ever happened to him. With the exception of Jongup of course. Jongup was his best bud and the guy who set him up with this… wonder.

                “No!” Junhong interjected, and Daehyun smiled a little. “I want to go to your house. Place. Do you have an apartment or something?” Junhong asked, and Daehyun nodded.

                “I do, but I live with another guy named Youngjae, but he normally stays in his room and doesn’t bother me much. He’s a really studious guy and when he’s not hitting the books he’s playing Starcraft. You might get along with him. Jongup did.” Daehyun said, and Junhong saw his eyes flicker to a look of regret as soon as the words left his mouth. He probably shouldn’t be talking about his ex’s around Junhong, especially when they were best friends. Junhong just took in a deep breath and decided to let go of Daehyun’s hand and put it around his waist and pull him in close to his side. He felt his skin burn with embarrassment.

                “Oh, you’re confident now?” Daehyun asked, and Junhong wiped his other hand on his shirt to rid it from a nervous sweat.

                “Hardly. I just… my hands were getting sweaty and that’s gross. I didn’t want to gross you out.” Junhong replied. Daehyun grinned and pressed in closer to Junhong anyways.

                “I don’t think someone as handsome as you could gross me out.” Daehyun complimented. Junhong shook his head.

                “You don’t know me that well then.” he said with a wink, and Daehyun just giggled before he led them around a corner and then they were walking up a flight of stairs, and then another, and another. On the third floor, seven doors down and on the left, was apartment number 344, and Daehyun pulled out some keys from his pocket and fumbled with the lock, but before he could turn the knob, there was a turn from the other side of the door and a bright looking kid with black hair stood in his way, rubbing at his eyes.

                “Why are you going in and out so early?” Youngjae asked, or so, Junhong guessed was Youngjae. The tips of Daehyun’s ears turned red as he stepped aside, and Junhong looked at the other boy with wide eyes, red face, and he waved meekly before Youngjae smiled at him, and then looked to Daehyun. “New boyfriend?”

                “We’re testing the waters first. He’s new to dating. lips too.” Daehyun said, and Youngjae looked to Junhong, whose mouth was opening and closing in disbelief.

                “Daehyun!” he shouted, and Youngjae just started laughing before he stepped off to the side and ushered them in. Daehyun didn’t say anything to console him as he grabbed his hand and pulled him past the door and into a fairly well kempt area. There was a small kitchen and a medium sized living room as well. There were only two bedrooms and one bathroom, but that wasn’t an issue as Youngjae retreated into his and then the apartment seemed like it was only Daehyun who lived there. When Youngjae wasn’t talking, it really was a lot quieter.

                “Anyways, my room is this way. Sorry for embarrassing you.” Daehyun mumbled out, and now, he seemed a lot more timid as he and Junhong walked hand in hand into Daehyun’s space, and it looked far too clean for a normal day.

                “Did you plan on taking me back here and hanging out?” Junhong asked as he looked around. It even smelled nice, and Daehyun looked a little sheepish as he kicked off his shoes and Junhong followed suit.

                “I anticipated it. Is it too much?” Daehyun asked him, and Junhong smiled and shook his head, piling onto the bed where Daehyun sat now, opening up his laptop and getting to the internet.

                “I think it’s nice. It’s really thoughtful you cleaned to… impress me?” Junhong said. “Were you trying to impress me?”

                “Something like that. I don’t know. I wanted to leave a good impression. I was cleaning all last night freaking out over all of this. Over all of everything really. I didn’t anticipate Jongup to set you up with me so fast and now I’m-“ Daehyun let out a sigh. His hands were trembling as he typed something into the search bar and Junhong thought it said ‘scary movies that will make person next to you cling to you’, but he couldn’t quite tell. “I’m really ing nervous. You’re… you’re like, the first person who I’ve ever approached because I’ve liked them. Mostly it’s other guys who come and see me and now I’m…” Daehyun made vague hand gestures to convey how he was feeling, and Junhong got the message.

                “If you’re regretting me, I can leave.” Junhong said, and Daehyun shook his head an shut his laptop frantically and made more rushed movements and Junhong this time didn’t understand what he was going for.

                “N-no! God no. Please no. . What I’m meaning to say is I don’t want you to leave. I just… I think we should talk more first maybe. Get to know each other instead of watching a movie. I don’t even know why I brought you here. I didn’t have a plan because like I said, Jongup set me up with you a lot faster than I anticipated. I assume he’s going back to Himchan?” Daehyun asked, and Junhong laughed out a little.

                “Yep. He said he was going to crawl back to him, which I think sounds a little downcast since it seems like he really likes Himchan.” Junhong relayed, and Daehyun chuckled a little.

                “Yeah. He’s all Jongup really ever talked about when he and I were dating. I don’t know why he liked me in the first place, but it’s okay. I – hopefully – have you now.” Daehyun said. Junhong grinned wide, and Daehyun felt a blush creep onto his cheeks.

                “We’ll see. Anyways, what do you want to talk about?” Junhong asked, and Daehyun ran a hand through his hair. He was still blushing, and he looked like a mess now that Junhong examined him more closely. He hadn’t been able to cover up some of the pimples that lines his jaw and were on his cheeks, and his roots were coming back in a dark brown since he had dyed his hair to make it look like a cloud in the sky, or a mix. Junhong couldn’t quite describe it. It seemed like he had wanted to go silver but it just ended up blue.

                “I don’t know. What grade are you in?” Daehyun asked, and Junhong felt a lump in his throat.

                “I-I’m a sophomore in high school.” he said back. Daehyun sighed out and discarded the strands of hair he had pulled out on accident off the side of his bed. He pulled in his legs and sat with them crossed. He held his feet in his hands and he shivered a little. The fan was on, but it wasn’t that cold. Junhong guessed he felt a little sick after hearing that.

                “Well, .” Daehyun laughed. “I thought you’d at least be like a junior. I thought wrong I guess.”

                “That’s not going to be a problem, is it?” Junhong asked quickly. Daehyun shrugged, a small smile on his face.

                “It won’t be if we don’t make it one. This is going to sound really rushed, but if you and I go any farther and into an actual relationship, and we… well, you know?” Daehyun stopped and once again used his hands to make a hole and stick a finger though it. Junhong’s ears turned red and he nodded. He didn’t think of too much since he was preoccupied with his first kiss, but the prospect was real, and it was really scary.

                “Oh.” was all Junhong could say in reply. “I told you though, I haven’t kissed anyone though. I haven’t really even put so much as a thought into… s-.”

                “I figured as much.” Daehyun laughed some. He seemed tense. “I’m supposed to be a college sophomore but I dropped out. School wasn’t for me. I’m more of a working man. I have a job as a producer here at home and sometimes I sing at clubs if my friends are so inclined to drag me along. You should come and listen.”

                “I’m not old enough to get in.” Junhong sheepishly said, and Daehyun’s face fell.

                “Oh. Right. Well, we can always get you a fake ID.” Daehyun told him, and from Youngjae’s room, he yelled.

                “Like hell you will corrupt the poor kid. Not on my watch.” Youngjae said, and it was louder than necessary because he was wearing headphones, but both Daehyun and Junhong laughed before looking at one another and smiling weakly.

                “We’ll figure something out. I really like you, and I’m not going to let age deter me. I mean, it should, but I’m just a really headstrong person.” Daehyun said, and Junhong saw him leaning in towards him, and he didn’t know what to do. He wasn’t sure if he was going in for a kiss or was just leaning in for the hell of it. Junhong put his hands on Daehyun’s shoulders and Daehyun stared on.

                “What are you doing?” Junhong asked. Daehyun laughed a little and he moved on the bed so he was facing Junhong, and Junhong was looking at him. They were face to face, and now it really only did take leaning in in order to kiss. Junhong felt his heart slam against his ribcage and he didn’t want to kiss Daehyun. Not now. Not when they weren’t even official. “I don’t want to kiss you.”

                Daehyun nodded though. “I wasn’t going to kiss you. I just wanted to look at you. I wanted to talk to you while making eye contact. We can only be so awkward for so long.” Daehyun told him. Junhong felt a little stupid.

                “Oh.” he said back, and Daehyun brought a hand up and poked his nose.

                “Maybe we should watch a movie first? Get used to physical contact or something?” Daehyun asked, and Junhong nodded his head eagerly. He just wanted to stop talking so he could stop embarrassing himself.

                When Daehyun opened up his laptop again, Junhong this time did have enough time to read what he had typed in, and it was ‘Scary movies to talk through’, but he quickly changed it to ‘Scary movies to cuddle through’, and Junhong laughed. Daehyun looked off to the side at him and smacked him on the chest.

                “Shut up.”