It was a rainy day in the middle of November. A man was sitting in the corner of a cafe, lost in thought. There wasn’t many people inside the cafe in this time of hours. Mostly was the people who need some place to sheltered them from the sudden change of weather outside. Or maybe it was those people who could be mistaken as a jobless men since they could sit inside a cafe at 10 in the Monday morning, like him.

It was almost 2 hours since he sat there and the weather outside hadn’t change at all. It brings an extreme gloomy feeling for someone who’d been feeling blue for such a long time. There was only 3 things on his table. A cup of – already cold – coffee, a black leathered notes book, and pen. He read again what he’d wrote for the last hours. It was only three short sentences, written in his messy handwriting.

Pride is mysterious part of human emotions. It build us up. Yet, it bring us down.

Awkward. It was the only word that could best describe the air around them. The awkwardness didn’t quite suitable with the loud music and slightly dimmed light inside the club they were in right now. He knows that something was wrong from the very first time he sat there, but he didn’t have any idea of what happened between them. It become clearer when those words come out of his mouth.

He should’ve known better when both of them seems to avoid this matter – and why they chose to met up on a night club which both of his friends actually weren’t really fond of on the first place. They’ve been chitchatting, catching up with each others life for the past hour – though Wooyoung seems to lost his mind somewhere else while Chansung loudly explaining every single details of his serving time to his favourite Hyung – when he finally decide to just bring the issue to the table. It was a hottest news for the past week. From the over-dramatic-non-stop televison broadcasts, to an over-grown middle school fangirls chatter, everyone around seems to talk about it, yet none of them gave a word at it. An engagement was something that ought to be celebrated, especially when it was his lovely Hyung, Nichkhun Horvejkul’s engagement.

“By the way, congratulation on your engagement, Hyung!” He cutely said. “Is there anything that I can help for the party? It’s in 2 weeks, isn’t it? Ten days? I remembered seeing a countdown to the party somewhere on the net few days ago. Your shipper must’ve been in so much joy right now.” He kept talking about the happy news ecstatically that he forgot to notice how the other man on his left side was clenching his teeth, trying hard to look anywhere but them.

Nichkhun just smiled to his giant dongsaeng. He noticed though – even without looking – the change on his other dongsaeng attitude. “Yeah, I want all of you to be there, so I decide to wait for a little while until Taec, Minjun, and Junho come back. You don’t need to worry about the party, I’m sorry I haven’t tell you in person.” Nichkhun said apologetically. “So, just come and enjoy the party, okay? Both of you.” He turned his head across the table to Wooyoung as he said the last words.

Chansung finally turned his attention to Wooyoung and it struck him. If Nichkhun was someone who couldn’t really hide his emotion, then Wooyoung was the exact opposite of him. Behind Wooyoung innocent face, Chansung knows very well that he was trying hard to hide whatever he was feeling right now. His eyes was focused on the strangely-not-so-crowded dance floor. He didn’t even bother to give a remark on whatever Chansung and Nichkhun have said all this while. Well, he hasn’t even said a word and Chansung just realized it all now.

“It was another strategy for our comeback, wasn’t it?” Wooyoung broke the uncomfortable atmosphere around them – even though it just became even more awkward. His face was still void of any emotion.

Chansung was about to ask what Wooyoung’s words meant when Nichkhun preceded him. “I did it for the team, we need it. It was good for our popularity, and of course them too. You’d know it before, what’s made it different now?” The angelic faced men said, his voice was calm and composed, but his face was full of rage.

“Team? Popularity? Do you know how textbook kind of words your answer is?” Wooyoung stared straight to Nichkhun eyes while Chansung sitting in the different side of the table between the two, watching them quarrelling in confusion. “Don’t you ever think to stop being such a hypocrite, Hyung? Tell me honestly, do you really love her? Stop telling the world how you loved her if you just did it because the company told you so. Stop acting like you care if you didn’t. Stop starting a family with someone you considered a best friend. Just stop! Enough is enough!” Wooyoung calmed down his nerves after his sudden outburst.

Nichkhun face reddened, like it was almost exploded. “Hypocrite? Do you ever thought about yourself? I loved her Woo, I really do. Yes I saw her as a best friend, but I love her and you don’t have any right to questioned me about it!” Nichkhun said in rage and disbelief. 

As he kept quite on the side, Chansung finally get what his two brothers had bickering, and it surprised him. Sure he knows how people works in this industry, it was one huge complicated conspiracy system as he like to called it. He just – naively – trying  hard to believe that it never happened in between them. But it does and it scared him. He was bewildered to the truth that the happy news which supposed to be a sacred things for the people involved was just a bunch of lies to marketed them – though there was really nothing he could do about it. In the other hand he was still puzzled with Wooyoung motives to opened it up now.

“Is that all you wanted to say Woo?” Nichkhun voice was challenging and Chansung realized that they need to talk in private, but Nichkhun was touching his hand as he was about to leave, motioning him to stay. “Don’t go, you have a part in this story too.” His words scared Chansung even more. “You still loved her, aren’t you? That’s why you act like this, right?” Nichkhun provoked Wooyoung and Chansung became even more confused.

“YEAH! I LOVED HER! I always does! I never have the chance to talk it out because of you! Are you happy now? Are you going to say that it was my own fault now to never say how I feel?” Wooyoung screamed out loud his bottled up feeling. 

Now Chansung understand why they had this reunion in the club and now he was stuck in the middle of them. He never thought that there was such a tension between his two groupmates. Nichkhun and Wooyoung was a really close friend, they get along really well, even the other members acknowledging their chemistry. For awhile Chansung thought how funny the situation was. He remembered a lot of their fans said that Wooyoung must’ve really jealous when Nichkhun announced his relationship with Tiffany almost 3 years ago, those Khunyoung things was really funny. He understand it now that it was actually true. Wooyoung had always been jealous of Nichkhun, not because he liked him like that, but because ha had the same feeling as him for her, for Tiffany - maybe even more than Nichkhun. But then again he thought about how it would affect 2PM now. It scared him and there was nothing he really could do.

“I never said it was your fault, but I did asked you before about it Woo, you’ve chosen not to take the role before. I’ve warned you about the engagement too when I called you 8 months ago, so don’t blame me now. I love her enough and it’s all that matter.” Nichkhun said firmly.

“It was not a role for me. I want to tell the world how much I loved her because it was the right thing to do.” A tears welled up on Wooyoung eyes.

“You should tell her then, don’t act like you’re such an innocent person who never loved anyone before. Man up and tell her. Don’t say you didn’t have any feeling for her when it was so obvious. Don’t encourage others, ME,  to be with her if you actually hate it. Don’t blame anyone now because it is your fault.” Nichkhun gulped the rest of his glass down. “You’re funny, Jang Wooyoung.” It was his last words as he walked out of their booth, leaving awestruck Chansung and sad eyed Wooyoung alone with their own thoughts.

He’d wrote once before about how human could feel so many emotions at once. He felt it before and he felt it again tonight. He was confused of what had happened. He was furious about all of those marketing strategies crap. He was disappointed yet feel sorry for Nichkhun. He felt pity for Wooyoung but another part of him was angry to him too. He was scared of what’s 2PM going to be. He was also burdened about the truth that he now knows. Chansung felt too much.

The blaring house music made Chansung already messed up emotions even messier. He didn’t even realized that Wooyoung was missing from his left side and already dancing like crazy on the dance floor. He could see how Wooyoung dance was really different tonight. Wooyoung move his hands around his body, swinging and twirling, his dance steps was fast-paced, yet Chansung could see the hesitation in each move he made – it didn’t even matched with the rhythm. He couldn’t see his lead dancer face but he could see the despair on his movements. It was a good thing that he was dancing on the deserted and dim-lighted part of the dance floor so it was harder for people to recognized him since his dancing got even more brutal as the minutes passed by. 

For almost an hour Chansung watched Wooyoung broken dance. Chansung couldn’t take it anymore, he got up from his seat and approached his friend. “Woodong-ah let’s go, you’re tired already.” But his friend didn’t even lessen his pace. Chansung reached for Wooyoung's hand, desperately stopping him. “Stop dancing Woo!” Chansung hissed loud enough for Wooyoung to hear him and he was glad that his friend finally stop. Wooyoung barely moved an inch as Chansung trying to him out of that place.

“I want to dance 'til I die.” Wooyoung said suddenly. “ I forgot what it feels to dance freely since I met you guys! It’s over! 2PM IS OVER!” Wooyoung eyes was red with anger. He was about to turned away and leaving when a cold, trembling, strong fist hit his left – less puffed – cheek bones.

Chansung didn’t know what had gotten into him. All the stress and emotions warfare since their dramatic conversation got the worst out of him. He couldn’t take it anymore when Wooyoung said one thing that scared the s out of him. It was written on one of the psychology book he’d read before. How you react emotionally is a choice in any situation. His choice was to let his body take over his brain and heart. Another emotions built upon his system as he looked at his friend's bruised lips and the sudden crowds around them, guilt and resignation. It’s really over, now.

He stopped writing once in a while to observed people around him. His eyes stopped at the sunglasses man standing in front of the counter. Something about his movement seems familiar to Chansung. As he try to sort his memories, he didn’t realized that the man already standing in front of him.

“Penny for your thoughts.” The man said with a bright smile on his face.

“Jaebeom Hyung!” Chansung said, startled.

“Keep it down man. I was just about to take the taxi when I saw you here. Are you writing? It really suit you, you know, being a philosopher,” Jay said happily as he took the seat in front of Chansung. His jokes hasn’t changed at all.

It was wonderful how the universe works to made people met with each other. You could met a new friend, an old friend, a best friend, even an ex-friend anytime anywhere. It was wonderful for Chansung to met his Hyung here. After all this years, he finally could talked with him again without worrying about what others would say and he was glad about it. Time flies so fast as they talked, telling each other what’s they’ve missed after all of this years for being under the spotlight. 

“I always admire how strong you could be Chansung-ah, don’t let them take you down, okay?” Jaebeom said after Chansung's story about how everything ended that time.

“Never Hyung, I’ve learned from the best, haven’t I?” Chansung remarked as he remember how Jay called him so many years ago just to scolded him to be a good maknae even if the leader wasn’t around anymore. 

Jay laughed out loud remembering those time. “Yeah, yeah, I know. Anyway, I need to go Chansung-ah, my flight to Seattle leave in half an hour. Good luck for your new book, I’ll read it if it was published in the U.S.” Jay said before he got up. 

Chansung watched his Hyung left, still shaking his head at his honest jokes.

“Ah I almost forgot...” Jay turned again as he was about to walk out. “I might have left and bring you guys a lot of trouble, it might have hurt your pride, but that decision was my pride, and I never regret chosen leaving. I hope you get what I mean. Pride is a matter of choice. You could just let it go or work hard to hold on to it. Well, you can wrote that on your new book.” Jay joked seriously.

Chansung just snorted and unconsciously wrote it down on his notes. 

“Goodbye Hwang Chansung.” Jay said for the last time before he walked out the cafe.  

“We’re really thankful for all the loves, supports, and affections that everyone gave to us through the years.”

“Because of everyone of you, we could stand where we are today. There was nothing that could express our gratefulness because of that.”

“We’re also giving our deepest apologize for making everyone worried, grieved, or even cried for everything that had happened to us until this day.”

“It was one, long, difficult, challenging, yet a beautiful journey we could never forget, even when we’re taking our own different road.”

 “In the future we hope everyone would always look over us, support and loving us just the same even when we’re not under the same name anymore.” 

“We’ll work harder and giving our greatest on everything we do in the future, and maybe one day we could met again in a greater place, as a better person.”

“Until now, we are 2PM. Thank you!” They said it out loud one last time with big smiles and teary eyes.

The cameras kept on flashing as they got up and left the press conference. Chansung felt like it was 2009 all over again, yet it was different. It was really over now, he said to himself. They’d been on the loose end of their brotherhood for the past 2 weeks. With what happened between all of them, they finally decide to go on their separate ways. The six of them realised that leaving all the problems unsolved wasn’t a really wise choice, but it was the only way they could think of.

They gathered on the changing room for the last time. No one said a thing – with Minjun mumbling some nonsense to no one but himself, Nichkhun busy with his phone, Taecyeon already drifted off to sleep, Wooyoung lost on his own world, Junho collected his belonging quietly, and Chansung staring boringly at the ceiling. The silence was broken off as Nichkhun’s manager knocked the door and called him out. He was smiling bitterly as he left the room.

“I’ll leave first.” Junho announced his departure and walked out the door minutes after.

Minjun hurriedly went outside few seconds after. Chansung could hear Junho name being called outside and somehow he could predicted what’s going to happen soon. Jun Brothers wasn’t just a nickname, they’re true brothers indeed, and Chansung knows very well how supportive yet competitive a brother could be. He drifted his eyes to Wooyoung and he realized just how similar his problem with Nichkhun with the one Jun Brothers have.

“I have a flight to catch.” Wooyoung said all of the sudden. He woke Taecyeon up and slightly tapped Chansung shoulder as he took his way. “Thank you and I’m sorry, Chansung-ah,” he added before leaving the room.

“You’re supposed to be the talkative one Hyung. I can tell that you weren’t really sleeping a minutes ago, so why you didn’t utter a word?” Chansung said to Taecyeon as he was the only person left beside him.

“I’m not the leader, nor a spokesman, and I’m tired of keeping everyone in check. Everyone definitely can made their own decision.” Taecyeon said calmly. “And I did sleeping Chansung-ah, it was easier for me to do that.”

Chansung chuckled at his remarks. “What are you going to do from now on Hyung? Why you didn’t renew your contract?”

“I don’t know,” he said simply like it was not a big deal. “But the important thing is that I’m not giving up Chansung-ah and I hope you think the same.” He smiled cheekily. 

“I’m not giving up Hyung. I guess I just need some break for now.” Chansung determined.

“Take your time maknae, just read your books and go to gym, no one knows what’s going to happened tomorrow.” Taecyeon said as they left the room together and took their different road to home.

People start to get to work again outside as the rain finally stopped. Even though the sun still refused to shine, Chansung mood suddenly become brighter. What Jay have said bring realization he hadn’t before. 2PM was just a name that hold pride behind it, the six members, his brothers and best friends, it was the real pride, they’ve built their pride together – with Jay too, before, and he was thankful about it – and he won’t let go of that pride, never for the God’s sake. Beside, Chansung realized, they never say goodbye. 2PM is still alive.

There’s gonna be a moment where you should choose to throw your pride completely or fight hard for it, and that moment for me, is now.

Hey everyone!! Been a long time, the last 2 weeks was such a hardest time for me, good things I finally have the chance to wrote something. Well the 6 of them is up now, hope everyone like it, though maybe some part was still hadn't pictured well, but I've tried my best, and I brought Jay here, just because. I hadn't put the complete mark on it, so I might wrote something like an epilogue or else. Rate and comments are highly appreciated though. Thank youuu!