A/N:  Happy New Year to all my lovely readers :) Sorry I took so long to update (been bit busy). I actually wasn't planning to update this, then I saw the comments from kimchoding91  and Woodaewoo  yesterday and I really wanted to give you guys a New Year's gift. So here you go. Hope you will enjoy it ^_^

Also Thank you so much for your lovely comments everyone. You guys are my little stars. You give me courage to continue when I feel like giving up.

My Special thanks to my love beta-reader PrincessPanjandrum for helping me edit this chapter ^_^ you are such a star PrincessPanjandrum and I'm the luckiest writer to have such a brilliant beta like you ^_^

Chapter 19: His Scent

The noise within the classroom subsides when ‘Cod-eye’ opens the door. He tosses the roll call book onto the lectern. The kids call him cod-eye, just because he always looks like he just woke up from a hangover. Jong Suk still doesn’t know his full name, but he goes by the name Mr Na among the teachers. He’s used to the nickname.

The kids scurry back to their seats. If it were nice outside, everyone would frown at the thick dust floating around the classroom, but it isn't visible in this weather. Jong Suk glances out the window. It is overcast and possibly drizzling. The class president, Hyoyeon, stands up and leads the class in greeting Cod-eye in a powerful voice, unusual from her bubbly words. Jong Suk looks at Hyoyeon. When their gazes meet, Hyoyeon widens her eyes and averts her gaze back to the teacher. Now that he thinks, she hasn’t spoken to him in a while. Hyoyeon isn’t the type to stay away from him just because he doesn’t initiate any conversations or only gives one word answers most of the time. She was the first to talk to him when he first entered school two months ago. It makes him curious as to what makes the girl avoid him as of late. Perhaps it’s for the best.

Cod-eye flips open the roll call book. Ms Jung has been on sick leave for two days now and he has volunteered to take her place as their homeroom teacher. There is a rumour going around the school that he was rejected by Ms Jung and still hasn’t given up. Jong Suk thinks they are a good match.

"What day is it today?" Cod-eye asks.

"Wednesday," the kids shout in unison, their voices ringing metallically.

"And what's the date?"

"April twenty-fifth."

He jots down the date in the roll call book. He looks around the class, but it seems like everyone is present. He starts the class. He thumbs through the textbook, questions the kids, wakes up the dozing ones, and assigns homework. History is the hardest subject to convince kids to take seriously. They don't understand why they have to learn History when it is all in the past.

When the bell rings cod-eye leaves the room with the roll call book and textbook tucked under his arm. Jong Suk gets up. Woo Bin is still sleeping peacefully beside him and Seung Hyun is surrounded by a bunch of boys from another class, all focused on some rock music playing on his tablet. He steps toward the cafeteria, treading past the hyper-energetic kids.

He makes his way past the corridor, down the stairs and along the footpath, but he is seized by the elbow when he reaches the cafeteria. He jerks around to see a familiar face staring intensely at him. He doesn’t remember talking to this girl before, but he has the feeling he had seen her previously. What does she want with him? Had he done something to anger her?

“Yes?” he asks, trying to pull away from the tiny girl’s grip, but she only tightens her hold. She has strong hands for such a petite form.

“Come with me for a moment,” she says, and starts dragging him the other way along the path leading to the back of the library.  The drizzle has disappeared and the sun is peeking gently through the overcast.

She pushes him against the wall and scans the surroundings carefully. Satisfied, she turns back to him, glaring into his large eyes.

“Stay away from him,” she warns.

“What?”

“I said, keep your ing hands off him!”

“What are you talking about?”

“Woo Bin. Kim Woo Bin. I’m his girlfriend and I want you to stay away from him,”

Oh, right this is her, Jong Suk thinks, looking her over again. It’s the same girl he once saw with Woo Bin. The one who kissed him by the staircase. He somehow had forgotten the fact that Woo Bin actually has a girlfriend he loves enough to go up against that beast of a gangster. That fact somehow pangs his chest. Perhaps he has come to rely on Woo Bin a bit too much that his world seems to resolve around that boy now. Perhaps it’s because they have become closer, friendlier and much more opened to each other, but the thought that Woo Bin will be returning to his normal life, with this beautiful girl doesn’t seem to sit well with him.

He rips her fists off his collar and buries his hands into his pockets.

“I think you have misunderstood,” Jong Suk tells her, “Woo Bin and I have nothing of the sort of relationship that you should be worrying about. So please stop concerning yourself with me.”

She grinds her teeth, breathing heavily, probably trying to keep her rage at bay.

“I am not accusing you of such disgusting things,” she hisses. “I’m saying you are talking all of his time that he doesn’t have any left to spend with me.” Her hands reach up and grip on her hips. “Stop being such a sissy and try to be at least half a man he is. And keep your freaking out of our lives.”

“Then,” she bows slightly and walks off, leaving Jong Suk behind. He clenches his fists and watches her disappear behind the building. He never thought Woo Bin would go for the clingy type of girl; guess he was wrong. He takes in a deep breath and heads back toward the cafeteria.

He had hoped to go for a proper meal, but he has lost his appetite now. So he settles for a red bean bun and a carton of milk. He buys two of each and goes to the roof top.

The metal door at the entrance to the roof is cracked open and he can hear a girl’s giggles breaking the silence there. Not many students dare to break the rules and enter this forbidden place, especially no girls given that the punishment if caught would not be something they can handle. The only girl he had seen here was Hyoyeon and that was also just once. But the giggles he hears sounds too overly manipulated and soft to belong to Hyoyeon. Who else could it be? He peeks through the opened gap between the door and the wall and manages to catch a glimpse of the female figure. It’s the girl from earlier, the one who had ranted at him out of the blue just a while ago. She sits next to Woo Bin, with a lunch box filling the gap between them. Well, what had he expected? She is his girlfriend and Woo Bin is now back to his ordinary life. He sighs and stares at the grocery bag in his hand weighing with the food he had bought earlier. He guesses this is no longer needed. He steps back down the staircase.

Perhaps he is really getting in their ways…he never really thought much about the fact that he could have hindered Woo Bin’s life. Woo Bin probably just pities him, knowing that he has no one to depend on. It must be the reason Woo Bin is taking care of him. Perhaps that girl has been right, perhaps he should really just out of Woo Bin’s life and stop depending on him for every single darn thing. He should let him breathe, live the life like he used to. He dumps the grocery bag in the bin at the entrance to the hallway. He has lost the last bit of hunger, if there was any, left in him.

***

With the nice warm weather outside, most of the students have retreated out of this closed off place into the grass yard outside and the class room is empty. He bumps onto Hyoyeon at the back entrance. Her eyes make a brief contact with his and she darts it down to the floor immediately. 

“Did you…have your lunch?” she asks her voice slightly hesitant. He wonders what has happened to this girl. She wasn’t the type to hesitate when it comes to talking. 

“I wasn’t really hungry,”

She suddenly looks up, clutching the wrapped up box in her hands. “Then, do you want to share with me?”

Jong Suk glances at the wrapped box she is holding at him. He doesn’t want to burden her, and he’d rather be alone right now.

“I—”

“My mom packed me too much. I can’t finish this all by myself,” she explains quickly. “She hates it if I bring any left overs. You’ll be a huge help.”

He wants to point out that she can just throw away the leftovers and her mom will never know. But looking at her round big eyes changes his mind. He nods. It’s been a while since he talked with her and she really seems bit out of it these days. He hasn’t seen her wide grin that usually brightens up her face in a while. May be she has some issues she’s struggling with…either way; it will be good for both of them. This bubbly girl might actually help him stay off from thinking about what Woo Bin’s girlfriend had said earlier.

“Thanks then,” he says, following the chirpy girl heading toward her desk.

She sets her lunch box open and takes the single pair of chopsticks and a silver spoon out. She looks back and forth, between her silver utensils and Jong Suk.

Jong Suk smiles at her. “It’s alright,” he says, “you can eat first.”

She grabs a piece of rolled egg with her chopsticks and holds it at Jong Suk. “We can both eat together,” she says, flashing her usual grin at him. He feels slightly better knowing she can still smile like that. Perhaps this lunch sharing thing was not such a bad idea after all. He seizes the egg roll and chews on it slowly.

“Why were you absent for two weeks?” she asks, spooning up some rice. “Were you sick?”

He swallows his mouth full of food. He doesn’t want to lie to her. But then again, he cannot really tell her the truth either. So he decides to go with the safest and easiest method and agree.

“Yeah, I was ill.” He hopes she will not question him further on his made up illness. And thankfully she doesn’t.

She places a piece of fried beef on to the spoon full of rice and tops it with a strip of kimchee, then carefully brings it closer to Jong Suk’s mouth. “Are you feeling better now?”

He nods and mouths the food.

“What do you want next?” she asks, “Egg?”

Jong Suk nods again and she grips it with the metal sticks. He suddenly feels like a five year old kid, waiting for their mother to feed them. Not that he has such memories. The only person who has fed him with such care is his aunt. He swallows the chewed food and opens his mouth wide.

The back door slides open and slams on the wall. Jong Suk jerks at the intrusion, mouth still wide open waiting for his food, followed by Hyoyeon.

Woo Bin stands at the entrance, his sharp eyes glaring at them. He doesn’t seem pleased. Perhaps something happened at the rooftop, Jong Suk thinks. He smiles and waves at Woo Bin. But the tall boy ignores him and strides toward his desk. He kicks his chair and slumps on it, leaning his head on the desk. Jong Suk wonders what aroused such a foul mood in him.

***

Woo Bin doesn’t speak to him for the rest of the afternoon. The lessons pass by as usual with the teacher continuing on with her monotonous lessons and Woo Bin sleeping throughout them, except Jong Suk’s mind that was preoccupied with possible theories for Woo Bin’s sour mood.

When the lessons end Woo Bin is the first to walk out. Jong Suk grabs his stuff and hurries after him. By the time he gets to Woo Bin’s motorbike, his girlfriend is standing next to him, flashing a sly smile at him.

“Oh, Jong Suk-shi,” she calls him in a voice coated with softness, far off from the threatening tone from earlier that afternoon. She takes a step closer to Woo Bin and wraps her hands around his arms, pushing her thin body against his broad frame. The same arms that wrapped around his waist last night are now being seized tight by this girl. The broad chest that spooned him closer is now hugging her soft looking body. His eyes start to sting. He bites onto his lip.

“Do you mind lending him to me for today? It has been a while since I had some fun with him,” she chuckles, like the sly fox she is. He glances at Woo Bin, waiting for him to say something, waiting for the word ‘no’ to escape his lips. But Woo Bin says nothing. He just stares at Jong Suk with a glint that he cannot read. So Woo Bin does want to go with her? That bastard! He promised his aunt that he’ll never let Jong-Suk wander alone in the streets.

Jong-Suk wants to say, I don’t own him, but stays silent instead.

“Will you be able to go home by yourself?”

What does she think he is? A six year old kid? He is eighteen and fully capable of finding his way home. He really wants to say something to her, but she is Woo Bin’s girlfriend and he probably won’t be happy to hear someone else badmouthing his girl right in front of him. His teeth sink deeper into his lips and he can feel the start of a metallic tang invading his mouth. Woo Bin knits his brows at the sight. Jong-Suk avoids eye contact with him and looks around instead.

He catches the sight of Seung-Hyun walking toward the parking lot, swirling his motorbike’s key around a finger.

“Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine,” he says. “I’ll get Seung-hyun to give me a ride home.” He forces a smile at them. Woo Bin’s eyes seems to darken. They stare at him as he runs toward Seung-hyun. The first condition his aunt had laid out is that he leaves home and returns with Woo Bin. She is reluctant to let him be alone, especially when outside. Well, it can’t be helped. Woo Bin has his own life to take care of.

“Hey baby. What’s up?” Seung-hyun grins the moment he sees Jong Suk.

“Nothing.” He says, staring at the brand new bike. Seung-hyun glances at Woo Bin and the girl.

“What’s up with your hubby? He’s back with his lover girl?”

Jong Suk shrugs. Seung-hyun slips his helmet on and swings onto his bike.

“Hop on,” he says, nodding at the back. Jong Suk hesitates. Sure he has walked off like he really meant to hop on to Seung-hyun’s bike and ride off, but that was meant as an assurance to Woo Bin and his girl. He didn’t actually mean to ride with him. He really wants to just walk home. But then again the possibility of that man lingering his way is really high and he certainly doesn’t want to take any risks he cannot handles the possible consequences of.

He climbs behind Seung-hyun and grabs the hem of his jacket. If it was Woo Bin, he would have slipped his hands into the pocket of his leather jacket and leaned his body against his back, that’s what he did when he rode with Woo Bin. But this is Seung-hyun and he isn’t comfortable enough to even hold tight onto his body.

From the corner of his eye, he sees Woo Bin glaring at him as the bike roars past them. Jong-Suk never dares to look back though. He fears seeing Woo Bin’s warm smile directed at that girl, his strong arms wrapped around her like she is a fragile work of art that might fade away if he let go, like she is the source of life for his struggling heart. Like she is the…love of his life… Jong-Suk blinks his eyes heavy with blur and does nothing to stop the trail of wetness skidding down his cheek. Why on earth was he crying in the first place, he doesn’t know. But one thing for sure, his feelings toward Woo Bin has stretched far beyond mere friendship or brotherhood, it has gone up to a point where he no longer dares to bottle them up. Because, they’ll just explode if he tries that.

***

By the time he gets home, both his aunt and Woo Bin’s father are home. He doesn’t see Woo Bin’s bike in its usual parking space. He assumes Woo Bin is still with his girlfriend. She did say they haven’t had much fun in a while.

“Oh. Jong Suk-ah…you are home,” his aunt greets him when he enters the hallway. He nods at her and slips out of his shoes.

“Where’s Woo Bin?”

He shrugs. All he knows is he is with his girlfriend for sure, but he doesn’t want the words rolling off his tongue. He is certain it’ll leave a foul taste in his mouth when the thought alone make him want to throw up. She doesn’t seem pleased with his answer and he knows why.

“Seung-hyun dropped me off,” he adds and she drops the topic at that.

“Oh, Jong Suk-ah, you are here.” Woo Bin’s father walks out of the living room. “I have good news for you,” he says, smiling widely. Jong Suk stares at his aunt who is also grinning. She grabs him by the wrist and drags him upstairs, past Woo Bin’s room and up the spiralling stars leading to the attic. Mr Kim follows behind.

“Ta-da!! Your room is finally ready,” she chirps, opening the door into a room filled with the smell of fresh paint. He slowly makes his way to the door, scanning the room from left to right and inhaling the smell. A small bookshelf on the wall holds most of his books and the rest is neatly stacked up on the study table. Walking over to the dressing table, he runs his hands over the smooth clean surface; it feels cold against his palm. He brushes past the study table that used to occupy the room he shared with Woo Bin and heads to the closet. He pulls open the doors and gaze carefully over the neatly piled t-shirts, the pale coloured pants and the hoodies all stacked neatly in their own little piles. He turns to his aunt; both of them watch his actions with wide smiles plastered on their faces.

“We already moved most of your stuff here,” his aunt informs.

“Do you like it?” Mr Kim asks. He wants to say yes. There is nothing in this room that stands out of his preference. The parchment coloured walls and the simple furniture along with the single bed are all to his liking. The strong smell of fresh paint does disturb him somewhat, but it’ll certainly disappear after a few days. But he feels like he is standing in a foreign place…a place he does not belong. Something does not settle in with him, like his aunt has left something behind….something vital to his life. He manages a small smile nonetheless and says he likes it and thanks them.

“You are going to have to use Woo Bin’s bathroom though,” Mr Kim adds, “Or you can use the one downstairs.”

“Well, change your clothes and have a look around,” his aunt says before heading back downstairs.

Jong Suk can hear them chuckling as they plod down. He sits on the fresh duvet on his bed. Everything feels too cold here, like he has entered a dark distance world. He is going to have to sleep in this cold room from now on. He wonders what Woo Bin will say. He probably won’t care much…in fact he’ll actually be relieved. He wasn’t too happy with the fact that he had to share his room to begin with. Now he gets to keep his room all to himself again.

***

Woo Bin was absent for dinner and Mr Kim wasn’t happy with that. Jong Suk had finished his dinner in silence.

He walks back to Woo Bin’s room and takes a nice warm bath. He takes his time pulling on his boxers and a short. Instead of putting the white T-shirt he has brought, he walks over to the bed, wiping his hair—their bed—where Woo Bin’s clothes from last night is folded neatly and placed by the foot of the bed. He was the one to fold them. Woo Bin never really cares about order, he just scatters everything around. He grabs the pale grey T-shirt and buries his face into it. It’s a musky scent with a hint of vanilla and something sweet, something faint and distant, something uniquely Woo Bin. He drops his T-shirt on top of his towel on the bed and slips into Woo Bin’s grey T-shirt. Picking up his towel and laundry he glances around their room one last time. He really wants to just crash on his usual place and fall asleep. But he no longer has a reason to do so. He sighs and heads back to his new room.

***

He rolls around on the bed, unable to catch any sleep. Sleeping in a new room, he feels like he is in someone else’s body with someone else’s soul stuffed inside him.

It’s past ten when he hears Woo Bin’s motorbike roaring its way into their garden. The engine dies out and he hears the front door clicking shut. He wonders where Woo Bin had been till this late. Was he with his girlfriend? He groans at the thought and tosses around. He really doesn’t like this bed.

He can hear the pitter patter of the shower running downstairs in Woo Bin’s room. He listens to the soothing sound and shuts his eyes. He feels the consciousness slipping away from him, his exhausted body slowly sinking into a deep slumber. But before he can grasp that slumber complete, he is jerked awake by the creaking of his door. His heart hammers. He clutches onto his duvet and listens to the heavy steps closing in.

“Are you sleeping?” Woo Bin asks. He sits up on the bed and looks at Woo Bin’s face dark under the faint gleam of the half moon.

“Did you just come home?”

Woo Bin says nothing. Instead he climbs under the duvet and stretches his arm. A distant smell of distilled soju wafts from Woo Bin. It’s a smell Jong Suk is too familiar with. But Woo Bin can’t be drunk, he doesn’t sound drunk at all. Woo Bin pulls him down, resting his head on his arm. The bed suddenly feels too warm.

“Why did you move here?” Woo Bin’s voice holds a hint of irritation and the same foul odour of liquor. Jong Suk wants to explain that he had no reason left to stay behind when they had already moved his stuffed here. Besides he was only told to share the room until Mr Kim got this room ready for him and that time is up now.

“They got the room ready,” he answers.

“And?”

“I had no reason to stay,”

Woo Bin stays silent for a while. He can feel Woo Bin’s heart thumping against his back.

“Or is it that, now that you got a girlfriend you want to be alone?”

He turns around to face Woo Bin, but his face is hidden behind the shadows and he cannot read his eyes. He doesn’t like this, when he can’t see what Woo Bin is thinking, what emotion plays on his face…it feels like he is with a stranger.

“What are you talking about?”

“The girl that was feeding you and giggling like a desperate sicko,”

“Hyoyeon?” She’s the only girl that has fed him, though he is highly doubtful of the sicko part. “She isn’t a desperate sicko and she was just feeding me because she didn’t have spare utensils,”

“What a nice excuse,” he sneers.

Jong Suk doesn’t understand what he did wrong to make Woo Bin this irritated. He has a girlfriend and he is not pleased of the fabricated fact of him also having a girlfriend? Woo Bin was with his girlfriend until this late and now he is venting his irritation on him? What was he doing until this late with her…he wants to ask Woo Bin. He wants to question him like he has questioned Jong Suk, but he doesn’t have a reason to do that. Woo Bin is not really his brother. Friends? He doesn’t know if they are. There is nothing solid holding them together, but he feels the need to know every single thing about this boy. Everything he does. Everyone he meets. Everywhere he goes…but it is out of his league. It’s just his need. Needs aren’t always granted, especially if the person with the need is Jong-Suk. He learned to live without those emotional needs. He mastered the art of burying them away. He can’t surrender now. He bites down on his lip.

“Why would you eat with her in the first place? I waited for you to bring my lunch and I had to go without it for the whole day!”

Lies. He clearly saw him eating with his girlfriend.

“And, you were fine clutching onto Seung-hyun?” His voice is slow, soft and warning. “Were you pretending to be all fragile and freak out when people touched you? Was it all just an act?”

Jong Suk’s eyes start to sting and his throat become stiff. He sinks his teeth deeper into his flesh. He can feel the taste of blood seeping onto his tongue. Why is Woo Bin being like this? Why does he doubt him? He is becoming like his mother. He is questioning him like his mother did when she found his -self cuddled in a corner of his room. He isn’t giving him a chance. The tears break out slowly. He can feel a trail of wetness dripping down his lip.

“Are you crying?” Woo Bin lifts his chin up, his voice is much calmer now. Jong Suk sniffles his sobs. “Stop biting your lips. You are bleeding already,” Woo Bin scoot lower and tugs his face up. He bends down and his tongue darts to at the trail of blood. Jong Suk stiffens when he feel the warm moist of his tongue sliding across his lip. Woo Bin pulls away and Jong-Suk stares with wide eyes into those dark orbs.

Woo Bin rolls him onto his back, slowly hovering over his small frame. His lips gradually descends, his gaze declares all Jong Suk needs to know. He is free to make the choice. He can either avoid those lips slowly closing in on his or he can just wait, until their softness press against his. He closes his eyes tight and waits.

Woo Bin’s fingers lace into his hair and his breath blows warm against his face now.

“Don’t close your eyes,” Woo Bin tells him. “I want you to know this is me. I want you to see me.”

A moment passes by and when Woo Bin doesn’t seem to be moving he gradually opens his eyes. There is a soft smile tugging on Woo Bin’s face. His lips finally find Jong Suk’s. His mouth moves over Jong Suk’s in a leisured kiss, his lazy and slow as if Jong Suk is a delicacy he is determined to enjoy. Jong Suk’s eyes slowly shut and he wraps his arms around Woo Bin’s shoulders, opening his mouth wider. His tongue tangles with Woo Bin’s and the bitterness of soju assaults his mouth. He breaks the kiss, gripping Woo Bin’s shoulders and keeping him away.

“Are you drunk?”

“No. I’m not drunk,” Woo Bin states, leaning down to capture his lips again, but Jong Suk avoids him this time. He should have known when Woo Bin started kissing him. There’s no way Woo Bin would do that if he was in his right mind.

Jong Suk tries to push him off, suddenly feeling those uncanny feelings stirring deep within him.

“You are clearly drunk and I don’t want to argue with you. Please go to your room and sleep.”

“I said I am not drunk,” Woo Bin says, pinning his arms above his head. Jong Suk struggles to break free. It feels just like when he was ten, being pinned down by a man he had no power to win over. His heart picks up its speed, his toes go numb and it corrodes its way up his knees over his hips, gradually reaching his heart. He wishes someone would come, someone who would release him from that awful grip. His eyes begin to shallow and he starts to withdraw. Just before he loses his senses, Woo Bin suddenly releases him and jumps off his body.

When Jong-Suk glances up, Woo Bin is sitting by the side, looking all panicked.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to harm you,” he says, reaching out for him. Jong Suk stares up into the ceiling patterned with the window’s shadow.

“I’m not drunk. I was with Seung-Hyun and he got drunk. I only had one sip. But that’s it. I didn’t drink more than that. I promise.”

Jong Suk sighs. He wants to sit up but his knees are still numb and he hasn’t completely regained his energy, so he just stays on his back.

Woo Bin’s hand reaches hesitantly and laces into his hair. This time he doesn’t reject the touch. 

“I am sorry. I went overbroad.” Woo Bin says, gently massaging his scalp.

“Forget it. I’m sleepy,” Jong Suk says, turning on his side. Woo Bin makes no attempt to move away or to lay back down. Silence envelops both of them.

“You can sleep here if you want,” Jong Suk finally says and Woo Bin instantly slips under the duvet. He fidgets for a while, probably pondering, but finally wraps his arms around Jong Suk’s waist and pulls him to his chest, pressing his lips onto the nape of his neck, where they belong.

God! How he had missed this warmth…now he knows what his aunt had forgotten to move in. He smiles against the pillow.

***