CHAPTER THREE:
"H-Hey !Wait up!" Kris screamed as he tried to catch up with JoonMyun,only to turn and realise he was gone. He had left. So fast and easily. A visible frown appeared on Kris's forehead. Joonmyun on the other hand,kept walking and walking. Just straight. It wasn't like he had any directions. Why did he tell so much to a stranger? Why did he feel so comfortable? He is a stranger! And everyone else...everyone else goes in the end...even his closest...
JoonMyun ran home. Relief. Yes,that was what he wanted. Some relief from all the nonsense in his life. He just wanted to run away from everything. He just want to drown and never appear anymore. He shut the door and locked it. He ran to his room and slammed the door while sliding down to the floor. Everything came crashing onto him. Everything turned black. "You're just a worthless fool." "Who would even like you? " "It would be so pathetic to see you kill yourself." "Haha look at the emo kid!" UGH,he screed to the voices in his head. He scratches his thigh skin. He pulls his hair. He does everything to try and stop the voices. He rolls up his sleeves.
No...I can't... Joonmyun head was killing him.
"You are ugly,like anyone will even care." "You should change your name to joonmyun_depress HAHAHA"
Crutching in the corner,he holds his head.
Everything is so different. There use to be someone there for him... but the truth hurts.
//Vibration of the phone// Joonmyun turns his crying face towards the phone. HIs vision was blurred. Grabbing the phone,he presses the answer button.
"..."
"J-Joonmyun? Y-you there?"
"who are you"
"Have you...been crying...?"
Yeah I was,so? It wasn't like you cared. His thoughts went.
"No of course not...what are you thinking? I'm not so weak,Sehun..."he weakly laughed it off.
//Knocks
"Open the door,joonmyun"
He hears knocks on the door. Whipping his blurry eyes, he peeks as the door hole.
Kris...?
"I will get back to you,Sehun." he hung up the phone.
Opening the door,Joonmyun pretended like everything was fine.
"How did you even get here"
"Joonmyun...I asked Sehun."
Joonmyun daren't look him in the eyes and instead,focus his eyes on the floor. What came next was Joonmyun felt warmness.
The sort of warmness that felt great. Joonmyun pushes him away. He didn't need another heartbreak,he didn't want to enter anyone's life,or let them enter his.
His cold eyes faced back with a pair of warm and passionate eyes.
"Stop lying to me,Joonmyun. I know you aren't okay."
Hold back the tears,fight them off,Joonmyun told himself.
"I'm okay. Everything is fine." he weakly smile.
"When will you stop? Joonmyun please... I just want to help yo-"
"Help me? This hole in my heart? No Kris,not today,please go."
Kris looked at him once more.
“People are afraid of themselves, of their own reality; their feelings most of all. People talk about how great love is, but that’s bull. Love hurts. Feelings are disturbing. People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous. How can they deal with love if they’re afraid to feel? Pain is meant to wake us up. People try to hide their pain. But they’re wrong. Pain is something to carry, like a radio. You feel your strength in the experience of pain. It’s all in how you carry it. That’s what matters. Pain is a feeling. Your feelings are a part of you. Your own reality. If you feel ashamed of them, and hide them, you’re letting society destroy your reality. You should stand up for your right to feel your pain.” Kris said.
"But what do you want me to do?!"
"I want you to face whatever trouble you have right now. Face it bravely."
"You don't even know what I'm going through,Kris! What do you know about me? Huh?"
"I don't, I know know anything but I'd know you feel like everyone is giving up on you and everybody is leaving you. Perhaps just like your parents,just like everyo-"
"Shut up!SHUT UP!" Joonmyun head was hurting so badly.
"You don't know what sadness is...you never know because you are never in this phrase. You don't know what it is like to wake up everyday,look at yourself and find yourself ugly. Neither do you known how it feels when you are all alone in the darkness at midnight and no one is there for you. Just the four walls."
And with that said, Joonmyun tumbled to the floor,his eyes closing slowly.
P.S. I rewrote it!! How is it now? >.< Next update might be next friday night ! Enjoy and subcribe:) Also,leave a comment ! Appreciated x
(( Can't update quickly because of school and what Kris said is taken from a quote ))
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