He rubs the mud on his hands on my face, as if putting facial on me. He’s making circular motions in my cheeks and on my forehead. And he’s seriously enjoying it.
“What are you doing?” What, no kiss? Where’s the kiss? Or there is no kiss? NEVER EVER EXPECT A KISS FROM A RICH PERSON IF YOU’RE A COMMONER, JOO-YEON. But, I expected. BUT HE’S KAI.
“Nothing, just having fun while I’m not imprisoned in my office,” he says, smiling. I can see how stressed he is whenever he is at the office, even if I am only with him for two days. I would have been cranky as well if I always encounter problems and stuff for every day I live. And maybe, if I have someone like me to work with.
“There! Your face would be smoother with my expert hands and organic mud. There’s no need to thank me.”
“I’m not going to thank you. Who gave you the permission to do this?”
“Don’t pout. I’m saying that this “mud pack” will work if you like me.”
My mouth drops open again.

“Why are you thinking that I like you? And maybe, you think that I thought that you’re going to kiss me when you held my face, which is so wrong. I didn’t think of that.”
“I didn’t say or think anything like that. Why are you defensive about it?”

     I gasp and shake my head, obviously saying ‘no’. . . And obviously saying that yes, I am hiding the fact that I do and he sees that, if he reads my actions wisely. I wait for it, for him to say something about it. But he keeps his mouth shut. Okay, I’m completely safe.

“Mommy, we better get out of this to start transacting and communicating with ‘their’ kind of people,” he says, stepping up on solid ground, free from mud and now covered with all of it because of him. He stretches his hand in front of me and I grab on, helping myself as well so as not to fly on grassland, and ending up looking like a swamp girl.

“What’s ‘their’ kind of people? You don’t actually want to help them and you’re doing it because you’re asked to do it and to appeal to people?” I ask, finally setting foot on land …the solid one.
“No, you’re belittling me too much. I’m not that kind of person. I just don’t get around people like them. They’re different and probably a lot more real than those from my industry.”
“Sorry, I just thought that … The word ‘their’ sounds mean so I just thought.”
“And speaking of thought,” he stops in front of me and nears his face to mine. I look away, facing my left. “Even if you’re covered with mud, maybe, just maybe, I could and would have kissed you.”
“What?” I turn to look at him. A wide smile is on his face. “Why are you doing this? Why are you mind ing me? You say things that get in my brain that I may entertain and maybe, just maybe, what you are saying about me liking you might be true. All too suddenly true. Don’t sway me with words, your sweet words that make me flesh and blood. I can’t dare myself to fall for you and maybe I’ll just do what you do, try to find a way to like you.”

   I walk away, to where Mr. Jung is, who is currently arranging a bath for us.
“Ms. Choi, are you in a fight with Mr. Kim?”
“Maybe, ahjusshi. He’s being pushy and I’ve been with him for only a few days as his assistant but it seems I’ve been suffering his annoying playfulness for a very long time.”
“Assistant? I know he calls you mommy and that you are not. I, then, formed a conclusion that he calls you that way as a sweet nickname or something like high regard. I even thought that you’re his girlfriend.”
I shake my head while shaking my hands. I hope he gets that I’m contradicting what he said.
“I thank you, Mr. Jung that you only thought of it and didn’t conclude.”
“You’re welcome?” he says doubtful and flashes me a smile. “But you know Ms. Choi, I make wonders. Well, people say I do, though I don’t know how. Everyone who tries to stop by here always ends up happy, whatever happy you think of. It may be something you don’t expect.”
“Oh please do, Mr. Jung. Please make Kai a lot kinder and less annoying and may he learn to understand people around him and stop making fun of them and just be true to himself. That could be what’s happy for me.”
“I’m not sure how to do that. You’ll find your ways. He’ll find his. You both just have to see if it meets up and if it does, then please know it’s not from me.”
“I… I mean, we still have to thank you, then, for letting the both of us stay here safely in your place.”

  Mr. Jung nods and says that the bathroom’s ready for me … and yes, even him.
“I’ve prepared bath towels for you and Mr. Kim. The bathroom is at the back of the house you’ll stay in.”
“감사합니다 (Thank you)” I nod and walk to the bathroom. There’s a drum of clean water outside it and I wet myself a bit, removing mud off my body. I enter and take a shower, feeling cleaner and fresher.

     Even if you’re covered with mud, maybe, just maybe, I could and would have kissed you.  I can’t believe he said that. Why is he pushing that I like him and why did he say that he could and would have kissed me? Where the heck did that came from? Did I reply to him? Did I? I can’t remember. I look up, there’s a smoked window and light shines out of it that I can only stare. What did I tell him? I can’t remember. I clasp my hand on my face, closing my eyes. I did tell him something, but I can’t remember. I dig in in my memory. I try to remember and I am getting something. I gasp, now realizing what I said. How can I say that I may, all too suddenly like him and how can I say that I’ll try to like him too? What the? Now, I can only hope that he doesn’t entertain what I said. And if he will, what do I do?
“Joo-yeon, you always remember to stick to your words. You wouldn’t like people saying that you say things you don’t mean just because you’re not capable of it. You say things because you can do it …and you will,” my omma told me once or twice.
       So, does that mean, I am capable of liking him and that I will like him? But I didn’t mean what I said. He must know that. I don’t break hearts. I just down want them to hope, because I don’t hope for anything.
 

Kai’s POV:

“Why are you doing this? Why are you mind ing me? You say things that get in my brain that I may entertain and maybe, just maybe, what you are saying about me liking you might be true. All too suddenly true. Don’t sway me with words, your sweet words that make me flesh and blood. I can’t dare myself to fall for you and maybe I’ll just do what you do, try to find a way to like you,” she says then leaves.

    What did I tell her wrong? I just told her what I could have done and not exactly saying I’ll do it; and would do it only if there are a couple of ifs. She’s talking to hyung and he flashes her with an awkward smile. I slowly walk to them, all too slowly that the mud is getting dry on me. She walks away, going somewhere I don’t know. I hurriedly walk to Mr. Jung.
“Hyung!”
“Kai, the bath is ready. The bathroom is at the back of the house you’ll stay in.”
“Thanks, and did Joo-yeon tell you anything?”

            He looks at me as if searching for the right words when he nods and starts to speak.
“She wished that you’ll be kinder and less annoying. She also hopes that you… uhm… you stay true to yourself.”
              I shake my head. That sentence really offended her but that’s not what I intended to do. I’ll try to make it up to her, some other way. I think an apology won’t work for the bother I caused her. I walk to the back of the house and I peek in. I try to see if she’s inside. She probably rushed her bath to go to sleep for her to keep a safe distance away from me. I won’t blame her because that’s all I ever did to anyone. I move away from the house and see the bathroom hyung is talking about. It seems empty and the door is slightly open.

           I push it open and I just lost my senses when I see something, or rather, someone I shouldn’t see in that situation.
“What the !” Soap, a shampoo, a scrub and the plunger starts flying at my face. The plunger’s handle hits me on the head.
“Get the ing out here!” she screams, slamming the door. It hits my face, forcing me to step backwards. I turn around and cover my eyes with my hands. I shake my head and sigh heavily. I’ll pretend I saw nothing. Ugh… I feel so icky. I hear the door creak and I turn to see her go out, looking at me sternly.
“Freak!” she says, stomping on my foot and pushes me. I land on the cold water of the drum, not knowing that it’s at my back. Before she leaves, she even throws a towel at me, the towel slapping my face hard.
“There! There’s your towel and the bathroom is free. NOW, you can take a bath,” she says, walking away. I can only see her legs since my upper vision is covered by the towel.

       Jeez, what just happened? Everything occurred too fast for me to even remember. Wait, I do remember everything. ! I stand up from the drum. How am I supposed to take a shower if my towel is wet and covered with mud that I wasn’t able to remove from me? I stand up and enter the shower. There’s a shelf with plenty of soap and shampoos and I can see why she can just throw them at me. I clean myself, scrubbing the mud away from my skin. Since it dried up on me, I’m having a hard time removing it. As I rush water on me, there’s a knock on the door. I open the door slightly, popping out my head so my body’s out of the sight of whoever is there.
“Mommy,”
“Here, take this,” she says, stretching out her left hand with a clean towel while she’s looking away. I can see that look in her eyes that she hates that she’s doing this.
“I don’t like to take it! It’s not done from freewill,” I say. She immediately looks at me, that deadly look on her eyes.
“What! Just take it! I don’t like to play games,” her voice just blasts on my ear. “And if ever that you,” she gulps. ! She’s going to bring up that moment a while ago. “If ever you saw something a while ago that you shouldn’t see, pretend you didn’t see that. If ever you didn’t really see anything, it’s better. But don’t fantasize how my physique would look. It’s rude, well, in my part. Don’t ever!” she says, her eyes growing big.
“Yes, mommy,” that wasn’t in my head, the fantasizing thing. That’s … , get it off my head!
“Tsk, just take this!” she walks to me, throwing the towel on my face and leaves, stomping as she does. I can’t help but smile. She has this thing that just hits my predilection. And yes, I’ve seen my worst disadvantage and it is amazingly making me opportune.

            Later that night, everyone gathered around a bonfire and mommy is there, but she’s avoiding me.
“So, we’ll start discussing what we’ll do tomorrow. We’ve ordered paint that will be used for the school’s mural and it’ll come tomorrow morning. We calculate that we can finish it by night tomorrow. To also save money, we are going to build the shelves and tables and chairs ourselves,” hyung says. There are other people there that are part of the project; I’ve met them earlier, after cleaning up
“That’s great. Although it takes much effort, the children will be able to value the school’s properties more,” I say.
“Kai, please sit down,” everyone looks up at me. “And yes, you’ve got our point. There’ll be more meaning to studying than just knowing things.”

      I sit beside Joo-yeon and she looks away. She shifts, moves a little away from me.
“Hey, I’m sorry,” I say, tapping her shoulders slightly.
“What?” she says irritated, and still not looking at me.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to do those things. That’s not intentionally done. I didn’t know you were in the bathroom. And the kiss thing, I am serious about that. I don’t know why, but suddenly I’m serious about it.”
“What the heck! Just listen to them. Please, I’m not in the mood of talking to you.”

     I feel that all eyes are on both of us. She stands up and I tend to follow her.
“Will you excuse us?” I walk to where she is.
“Joo-yeon, hey, I said I’m sorry. I mean it.”
“Kai, just go there. You need to go there. You’re the head of the project; you have to be there,” she says, pushing me off. She runs away, heading for the house. I silently look at her, not moving until she falls to the ground.
“Are you alright?” I run to her. She tries to stand up and falls back to the ground. She touch her ankles and she hisses. I come to help her up. She shoves me away.
“Go, go back there.”
“I’ll carry you back to your room. Come,” I slowly pull her up.
“We-wait. Wait. !” I hear her breathe against her teeth. I put her back to the ground and she’s holding her ankle.
“I’ll just carry you up,” I put my arm underneath her legs and her arms. I slowly lift her up.
“No, no. Put me down,” she says, tapping me lightly. “Him! He’ll carry me,” she says, just randomly asking the guy who passed by. He shakes his head and leaves.
“He doesn’t like. I’ll carry you, okay?” She breathes out and slowly nods. I put my arms underneath her legs and arms.
“No, not like that.”
“What do you want?”
“Just carry me on your back.” I carry her on my back, her arms intertwined against me, hugging me into her warmth.

        She leans in, her head on top of my left shoulder.
“Hey, I’m just too shocked with what’s happening. So, I’m sorry for acting like a “nagger". Well, acting your actual mother.” I smile at the thought of that. “You’re saying random things that just confuse me. I don’t get the fact why and how can you do all those, and appear mean but at the same time,” she stops.
“At the same time what?”
“At the same time, almost someone who’s easy to be fond of because of his hidden innocence,” she continues, bearing her head closer to my face. Someone easy to be fond of? Me? How could that be me? As far as I know, I’m the person hated most in my industry. She sees that side of me no one can see and I don’t remember breaking down my wall for someone, so how can she…?
“Hidden innocence? What does that suppose to mean?”
“I don’t know, those things that may look different in your perspective.”
“I don’t uh… get it,” I say, shaking my head.
“I don’t think you should. There are things that we don’t need to understand; we just have to accept it even if it’s vague.”

      I enter the house; open the room to her door. I sit her down on her bed.
“Will you be alright here?”
“Yeah.”
“Have you eaten?”
“Yes, we ate before you came. So, suit yourself. You have to eat also.”
“Let me check your feet first,” I kneel down and hold her feet. She hesitates at first before I look at her in a bossy way. I twist it slightly to the left and right. I can hear her hiss as I do.
“I probably sprain it. It’ll go away if I rest it.”
“Okay, I’ll see you …uhm…”
“Tomorrow,” she says, continuing my sentence.
“Yeah, tomorrow. I’ll see you tomorrow. You should get well, okay?,” I say and head out. Part of me wants to stay and just be her doctor, and part of me has to leave to discuss the important things.

                I walk to the bonfire again and their eyes are all on me.
“It turns out she just needed rest. It’s been a very long day for us, since we’re not used to all these hard work.”
“We understand,” hyung says, nodding. “And oh, Kai, Ms. Choi told me to give you this and to tell you to eat it. She’s making her being your ‘mommy’ a career already,” he says with a smile.

     I stand up and get the plate. There is fish meat and rice. Fish meat? What the? She thinks I can’t shred fish meat so she did it herself. I shake my head and smile, all because of disbelief. I eat while they talk about crops. Today’s just her second day with me and I think I know so much about her.

           I twist and turn on my bed; I can’t find a way to sleep tonight. I’m bothered by something I don’t know. It feels painful in my chest, something I have to get out. I stand up; I need fresh air to clear my mind. As I am approaching the door, I notice Joo-yeon’s door open. I peek in and see her sound asleep. I walk in, aware of the intrusion I am causing, as long as she does not wake up it is not called intrusion. I sit beside her bed and lean down to her feet. I touch her ankle and she flinches. I move away and go closer to her.

“Mommy, I’m sorry about today. I don’t really know what’s going on. And there’s just something about… you. Everything’s all too sudden with you. Everything’s rapidly happening that I can’t catch a glimpse of what could happen next. Ha, it pains me here to not understand what’s going on,” I say, touching my chest at the same time looking at her.
“Am I a chicken? Saying those things I can’t say when you can hear me? I’m a guy, I’ve got no actual shame; how can I not let you hear these? How do you deny something that will soon be obvious? And when that soon comes, how do you deny the fact that it exists?”I cover my face with my hands and breathe in.
“Joo-yeon, for the record, you’ve made me fall for you the fastest,” I say, leaning in, stopping inches close to her face. 
“Forgive me, but how do you stop when this feeling is already there? Or is it not possible?” I put my lips on top of hers; kissing her while she doesn’t know. And she may never know.