As I rubbed my temples, Mark patted my back. We sat on the swings. "What's wrong?" he asked me. I looked into his kind, brown eyes. There was something in them that made me smile. I shook my head and pinched his cheek, "I'm fine."

He pulled my hand off and rubbed his cheek, "You've gone crazy."

I sighed and nodded, "I guess I have." I squinted as I thought of where I saw Bambam's face from. I groaned and pushed back to start swinging. I've seen his face from somewhere, I just don't know where. As we swung in silence, I thought deeply. I thought deeply into my past. Then I realized, it was him. My first love. My first nightmare. My first to everything. The person who took my hand and led me away from reality. The person who made me live in a fantasy like world. As the anxiety got to me, I jump off of the swing from a very high height and landed on my side. I frowned and stared at the sky. I heard footsteps run towards me. As my vision started to blur, the last person I saw was Mark.

I was instantly rushed to the hospital. They checked if anything broke but it turned out I just fractured my arm and was mentally unstable. I looked at Mark, who was frowning at me. He had a very stern face. As he spoke, his voice rang in my head, "Tell me. What happened?" 

As I try to stop the ringing in my ears, I look at the IV bag which was filled with the fluid. I looked at it go into my veins and then looked at the edge of the hospital bed. ".. I found him."

Mark looked at me in shock, "Don't." 

I gave him a sorrowful smile. "Bambam is the one." He reached out and hugged me, telling my that maybe it isn't him. I pushed his arms away and told him it was him. Mark looked at me and sighed. We thoroughly thought about things and planned everything of what we're going to do. I'm not really mentally stabled but I'm not as stupid as people thought I was. I lost everything because of one mistake. That mistake was Bambam. Bambam was the one who threw me off this cliff and never thought to look back. I fell hard for him, not realizing that he was a trap. Bambam was a trap that even he didn't know. It was all too.. realistic to be planned. Somewhere along the lines, we both fell for each other. 

//flashback.

I held tightly onto my skirt and ran to Bambam. We sat at the dock at the lake behind the get-away house and watched the sunset. As little kids, we were awfully close and trusted each other dearly. Due to the fact he and I were just that close, I snuggled up against him and hugged his arm. He looked at me and pulled out a crimson rose. My favorite rose was a crimson rose. I blush a little and take the rose, "Thanks." 

As he and I look deeply into each others eyes, he leans in and kisses my forehead. I was taken back considering we were too young, but I would be lying if I said I didn't enjoy it. I smile and look back at the sunset. 

The sunset looked much better that day. 

//end.

I frowned and was shortened in breath. I looked at Mark. I couldn't breath. I had a problem with depression. Ever since the day I had to live like a homeless person, I was scared of seeing my parents so stressed out. I grabbed Mark's hand, "Mark. My.. My pills."

He quickly reached into my bag and handed it over, "Hurry. Take it."

I smiled and swallowed a pill down with bottled water, "I know I can count on you." As he fiddled with my fingers as he always does, we heard the door slide open. "Are you okay?!" a voice called out. I looked over and looked at the man with my widened eyes. "Oppa, it's been a while," I said.

As my big brother sighed and nodded, he took a seat beside me. He looked at Mark and back at me. "Still close as ever, huh?" he grinned. I nodded. My brother was a guy who's currently majoring under business. His name is Park Woori. Oppa would always be busy since he's been called by many companies in Korea and overseas. I looked over at my big brother and smiled. He was the one who listened to me when we lost our company. 

As the three of us laugh and talked for the past 30 minutes, my brother's smimle faded and looked at me. "Eunbi-yah, I'm aware you know they're here," he says. Mark and I look at each other and look away. "Yeah," I said, managing to hold back the pain and anger.

"I'm pretty sure you're angry?" He asks us.

Mark scoffed, "Angry? I'm BEYOND angry. That son of gun had the guts to come back after the he put all of us through." I felt his anger.

"I can't believe he thought he can hide it from us," I said, trying to keep my voice down. My brother smiled at us and patted my shoulder. I looked deeply in his eyes and saw something twinkle. I smiled as I realized where this was going. 

We sat there discussing this matter till late. "Alright, Eunbi, I'm sorry, but we're going to have to mess with him." I looked at my brother and shook my head. There was nothing but pain right now. I wanted to release in some way. The fact he played my heart was more than enough back then. 

My brother laid out a plan and all I could say was amazing. It seemed as if he planned it out pretty well. "In exactly three months from now, I'll be back. Don't slack off, but don't just go for it. This is supposed to be a slow processes." We both nod. Mark and I talked till we fell asleep which was around 3 in the morning. We woke up around 9 in the morning. 

As I rub my eyes open, there was a cast on my arm and Mark was talking to the doctor. When the doctor looks at me, he suddenly grins and leaves. "What'd they say?" I asked, reaching for the container of fruits beside me. 

Mark ran his fingers through his hair and said, "You're going to be here for another week or two. He also said that you took your IV pretty well." I nodded as I reached for his hand. There was something wrong with my heart. It felt unstable. I quietly reached for Mark's hand as he was looking away. "Mark," I whisper.

"What's wrong?" he gently says.

I look in his eyes and cry out, "I don't want to be here right now." As he carressed my face, he sang me a beautiful song. I got nothing, nothing to say. "Every time that I try, not a word can come out. Cause I'm dumb." I smiled and felt more relaxed. This was something Mark always does. He would sing me a song. A special song. A song with a lot of meaning. He knows I love those type of songs.

Being here at the hospital has gave me so much time to think. I'm being released tomorrow. And well, what can I say, I'm excited to get out of this tragic place. I stand up and look out the window. I wasn't able to see so much of Seoul in a while. I hug a teddy bear that Mark gave me a while back. I hear the door slide open. I swing around to see who it is. I stare at him shocked. "Bambam," I say, keeping my anger to myself. He runs to me with a worried look. "I'm so sorry I couldn't come sooner," he frowned. In his hand was a bunch full of flowers. As he held it out, I took it and put it in a vase. "It's alright. Mark has been coming by lately," I smile.

Bambam flinched as I said that. He put a reassuring expression and sat in a chair beside the bed. I sat in the bed and smiled at him. "You remind me so much of somebody," I grin, getting the plan started. Plan #1: Friends Again.

"Someone? Who?" he asks, his eyes widening.

I take a deep breath and pretend to think, "Hm.. I don't know. I think I called him a bum when I was little."

"B-Bum?" he said, looking at me nervously.

"Yeah. You see, I wasn't very good with names as a kid." Which was true. I never really was.

"Well, this Bum guy, what happened to him?"

I smile and take a breather. It wasn't easy to talk about my past without wheezing out. After a moment of silence I spoke again. "Bum happened to be a real Bum. He shook up my world this one day. And after a week or two, he left. He left in thin air. I don't know where he is today, but I hope one day he and I will meet again." If you've ever had someone leave without notice, you'd understand what I'm saying. The fact that you fell in love with somebody and they just disappeared. I looked at Bambam and smiled, "I really wished he was here though. Comforting me, hanging out with me and Mark again." 

Bambam was really different after I said that. He suddenly started talking about his interest in  making music. Which didn't surprised me because ever since we were little, he was always talking about those American artists. I listened to him attentively and nodded. 

After we, I mean he, talked for an hour, silence has fallen over us. The silence was getting to me. I didn't know how I was supposed to act during these type of moments. So I sat there fiddling with my fingers. Though it wasn't long till he spoke again. "Eunbi," he said, looking at me sorrowfully.

I looked at him and smiled, "What is it?" 

He let out a sigh and looked back at the ground, "I know I have no right to say this, but I think I like you. Whether it was the time we first met or the time you held my hand, all I know is that right now, at this very moment, I like you. I don't know if you want to remember this but, remember the time you got kissed on the dock?" I looked at him. Seeing pictures go through my head. My breathing increased.

"Or the time we swung together on the swings while holding hands?" he continued. I wanted him to stop. But I couldn't make out the words. I felt my heart, slowly flutter at the nostalgic memories. They weren't exactly something I wanted to remember, but how can I forget them.

"Or perhaps the moment where you came to me crying the last time we met?" he finally said, "I didn't know why you were crying, but I felt your warm, salty tears soak my shoulder. It felt like fire lit my shoulder." I gained control of myself and looked at him with a smile and tears. "Bambam, I think I need time to myself right now." He had a lost expression, yet he bowed and dragged his self out of the room. I felt my stomach tie in knots.

This 'love' I feel for him nothing but another regret and mistake.

author's note:

Alright! <3 Chapter two is out! It's sorta out of place, but I hope you enjoy! (: