December 22nd 

Baekhyun wakes up extra early the next day and quietly makes his way into the M dorm. He had made a promise to Jongdae and to himself that he would always be there for his best friend and meant to keep his promise. He slowly closes the main door behind him and walks into the dark living room. He sets down the container of porridge that Kyungsoo had made the previous night for Jongdae and sighs when he sees his best friend curled up on the couch as usual.

Baekhyun grabs one of the extra blankets from the closet when he sees Jongdae shivering and slowly makes his way to the couch. Even though he had told Jongdae many times to stop sleeping in the living room, Jongdae never listened. "I like it out here," Jongdae would say whenever one of the members would try to make him go back to his room. Even when they carried him back, he would always sneak out sometime later at night.

Draping the blanket over Jongdae, Baekhyun notices the bruises and small scratches on Jongdae's arm and frowns with worry. It's happening again Baekhyun thinks as he gently brushes his fingers over the wounds. He makes a mental note to grab some medicine before leaving for schedule and sits down next to Jongdae. He slowly leans his head on the other boy's back and brings his hand to cover Jongdae's. I know it's hard for you Jongdae-ya and I wish there was something I could do Baekhyun thinks miserably. but... I can't because I'm not Luhan. 

Baekhyun sighs and looks over at Jongdae and Luhan's room. I wish Luhan could do something... he would know what to do. Baekhyun feels tears forming in his eyes and he angrily rubs them away. He had promised himself that he would no longer cry, he couldn't cry not when Jongdae was hurting even more. He had to be strong for Jongdae, strong enough for the both of them.

Baekhyun slowly glances at the clock and grimaces when he sees that Jongdae has only another 15 minutes before he has to get up and start getting ready. He wants to go and tell the managers and freaking Lee SooMan that Jongdae was in no shape to be performing but he knew that his protests would fall on deaf ears and even if they did something it wouldn't be in Jongdae's best interest.

They'll take everything away from him, they'll take away the one thing he has left Baekhyun thinks as he rubs Jongdae's hands, trying to warm them. But I can't.. no I won't let that happen. Jongdae will always be a part of Exo... We will always be the original 12. 

He stays silent for the rest of the time, choosing to just listen to Jongdae sleep and when the time came he shakes him awake and slowly drags him to the bathroom.

"Where's Luhan?" Jongdae mumbles sleepily rubbing his eyes. Baekhyun puts a finger to his lips, "Shhh we're going to wake everyone up. Luhan's asleep in your room duh."

Jongdae smiles, eyes still half closed, "Ahhh good.. he needs to sleep, he doesn't look too good these days. I think he might be falling sick." 

Baekhyun nods, "Oh really? I'll tell manager hyung then, they'll probably cancel the rest of his schedule so he's in perfect shape for Christmas Eve! You know we need our Chinese prince to be there." 

Jongdae nods his head, toothbrush in his mouth. He mumbles something incoherent but Baekhyun assumes it was him agreeing to the idea.

"Now hurry up, you're going to eat all this porridge before we leave," Baekhyun says smiling.

Jongdae groans and starts to pout but Baekhyun just closes the door, "I'll be waiting," he says teasingly as he starts to walk towards the kitchen, ignoring all the protests coming from the bathroom. 

After practically force-feeding Jongdae the porridge, they finally make it to their recording. It goes off without a hitch and the PD's even compliment Jongdae, saying that they hadn't heard Jongdae sing like that in a long time.

Jongdae smiles and thanks them. He did feel better and it was all thanks to Luhan and maybe because he hadn't seen any of his "friends" that morning. Luhan had promised him that he could make it all go away and Jongdae smiled as he remember Luhan's arm around him. He felt warm and safe, as if nothing in the world could harm him. He's drinking water and chatting away with Baekhyun when he thinks he ses a boy run behind the pillars. He gulps and walks towards the pillar, trying to convince himself that it was nothing. Peering around the pillar, he breathes a sigh of relief when he sees no one. But then he hears a familiar cackle and he spins around trying not to be scared. But he didn't see the woman, just Baekhyun and Kyungsoo walking towards him, worry in their eyes. Jongdae takes a deep breath and decides that it's just his mind playing tricks again. He waves off the concerned look from his group mates and make his way to the van. They had finished their schedule and Jongdae wants to get back as soon as possible to Luhan, who was probably bored without him. Jongdae feels a bit bad lying to the members that Luhan had come down with the flu but he didn't want them to disturb Luhan because he knew that Luhan was probably tired from staying up all night with Jongdae. 

I'll make it up to him Jongdae thinks as they drive back to dorms. When they get there, he shouts a short goodbye to Baek and Soo before running up the stairs and into the dorms. The rest of the M members are hanging out in the living room since they didn't have any schedules for the rest of the week as well.

"Hey guys!" Jongdae says cheerfully as he takes off his coat. He hears Yixing say hello from the kitchen and Minseok and Tao jerk their heads in response not wanting to get too distracted from their video games. Jongdae rolls his eyes as he sees Tao try to hit Minseok to knock the controller out of his hands and walks into the kitchen looking for something to eat.

"What you making?" Jongdae asks as he peers over Yixing's shoulder. Yixing laughs slightly, "Why? are you hungry? didn't you eat at the recording?"

Jongdae rests his chin on Yixing's shoulder and pouts, "Yeahhhh but I'm still hungry and I also want to bring Luhan something to eat. He's probably already angry that no one's come inside the room."

"I heard he's sick?" Yixing asks turning around to gaze at the younger boy.

Jongdae gives a sly smile, "Yup... very very very sick.... so sick that he can only stay in bed and be taken care of ... by me!" 

Yixing shakes his head but can't help smiling, "You always do this... getting Luhan out of his schedules."

"But he really does look sick... maybe not contagious sick but still tired sick!" 

Yixing brings his hand to touch Jongdae's cheek. "I don't think its Luhan we should be worried about right now Jongdae. You don't look well at all."

Jongdae sighs, "I'm fine... I promise. You know I try to eat a lot.. but I never gain weight! I'll be fine and besides I'm the main vocalist duh!"

Yixing rolls his eyes but reaches over to grab a tray and starts to fill it with some soup and rice. "Alright well take this and don't give it all to Luhan, you need to eat it too!" 

"Thanks hyung!" Jongdae says happily grabbing the tray. "You always take care of us so well. What would Luhan and I do without you?"

Yixing gulps trying to get rid of the lump forming in his throat and struggles to put on a happy smile. "Well I'll always be here so don't worry Jongdae-ya." Yixing says voice wavering. Thankfully Jongdae didn't notice since he already started to walk away, singing "thanks" and "I love you" out loud. 

When Jongdae walks into his room, he immediately offers the food tray to Luhan like it was a peace offering.

"What are you doing dummy?" Luhan says laughing as he put down his book.

"Oh you know just being the best boyfriend ever and bringing delicious food that I cooked all by myself," Jongdae says happily setting the tray on Luhan's lap.

Luhan opens the food cover and starts to laugh when he sees what's in it. "Oh really? are you sure? because the last time I checked only Yixing could make the Zhang Yixing special."

Jongdae look over and sees the soup and frowns, "Ahh crap. I didn't know Yixing-hyung made that today!" 

Luhan pinches Jongdae's cheek. "Well at least it's the thought that counts. But I'm not that hungry so how about you eat it? I need to fatten you up!"

"Awww Luhan not you too! It's not my fault I don't get fatter when I eat!" Jongdae says flailing a little bit on the bed. "It's not my fault that I was blessed with an amazing metabolism!"

"I agree... but your metabolism is far from amazing.. it might just be working too well!" Luhan says laughing as he grabs the spoon and tries to feed his boyfriend. After a few refusals Jongdae finally allows himself to be fed.

"Well now don't you look cute," Luhan says smiling as he watches his boyfriend adorably pick apart the chicken in the soup. 

"Excuse you... I'd rather be called handsome," Jongdae says with a wink. 

Luhan rolls his eyes, "Anyways how was recording? and how are the rest of the guys? I feel like I haven't seen anyone and no ones come inside to see me!"

Jongdae laughs nervously as he puts down his chicken leg, "Well um... that's probably.... because well I told them that uh...."

Luhan narrows his eyes, "What did you tell them?"

Jongdae scoots a tiny bit away from Luhan and averts his eyes, "Oh you know nothing big... just that um you have the flu.... a very dangerous and contagious flu?"

"Whaatt??? Why would you tell them that?" Luhan says yelling. He grabs a pillow and throws it at Jongdae.

"But babyyy... you looked so tired and you kept saying your head hurt and I didn't want you to be disturbed and I don't want you to get sicker!!!" Jongdae says peering behind the pillow. 

Luhan scrunches up his nose and lies down on the bed, turning his back on Jongdae. "Don't lie.... you're just jealous that I might have fun without you."

Luhan feels Jongdae lie down behind him and tries not to smile when he feels Jongdae's arm wrap around his waist. Jongdae leans up over to whisper into Luhan's ear, "Well that too... but I really did want you to rest, especially because we have our duet in two days!"

Luhan pushes Jongdae's face away with his palm. "It's not even a duet you dummy... did you forget about best friend for life Byun Baekhyun!"

Jongdae laughs and buries his face into Luhan's back, "ooooohhh is that jealousy I hear? and even if baekkie is singing I only hear you and I."

Luhan snorts, "Please I would never be jealous of Baekhyun... and stop trying to flirt your way back into my good graces... especially after you told everyone that I was basically infected with like the bird flu or something." 

Jongdae giggles and turns Luhan over to face him. Luhan closes his eyes, still trying to ignore Jongdae but Jongdae wasn't going to let him go that easily. Jongdae leans over and kisses Luhan's eyelids softly and keeps doing so until Luhan finally opens his eyes.

"This is harassment," Luhan says stubbornly even though he doesn't stop Jongdae from continuing to kiss the rest of Luhan's face.

"Mhm," is all that Jongdae says as he keeps exploring Luhan's face with his lips.

Luhan stifles another giggle and tries to frown, "Well if you don't behave then I won't give you your Christmas present!"

That stops Jongdae immediately, he had been wondering since forever what Luhan had planned for their day off on Christmas day. "Please tell me? maybe even just a teensy weensy hint!"

Luhan smiles, glad that he now had the upper hand. "Well I won't tell you your present but I will tell you what we're going to do on our day off!"

"Oh really?" Jongdae says with a sly smirk.

Luhan slaps Jongdae on the forehead, "Don't be a ert.. you ert. I think you've been hanging out with the maknae's too much!"

Jongdae laughs and sticks out his tongue, "You're the ert for thinking that I was thinking erted thoughts! and the maknae's love me and I love them so I can't. but go ahead tell me what your plans were?"

"Well... it definitely doesn't involve any exo members and it definitely won't be in Seoul."

"Oh? not in seoul?" Jongdae says raising his eyebrows. "then where? Are you planning to whisk me off on a romantic getaway?"

Luhan pecks Jongdae on the forehead with a kiss, "That is a definite no no.. you know we already have the Gayo Daejuns starting the day after Christmas!"

Jongdae pouts, "then where?"

"Secret!" Luhan says with a smile. Jongdae sticks out his lower lip even more, "Well that was the vaguest hint in the world. Why don't you love me enough to tell me?"

"I love you so much that I can't tell you!" Luhan says with goofy smile.

"such a meano Luhan-hyung is... You just do-" Jongdae starts but suddenly turns his head around as if he heard something.

Luhan lifts himself up, "what's wrong Jongdae?"

Jongdae doesn't respond and continues to stare around the room as if looking for something. He keeps turning his head left and right as if hearing something. Luhan gulps realizing that it's happening.

He hesitantly puts a hand on Jongdae's shoulder and shakes it to grab his attention. "Jongdae? baby?" he says softly.

Jongdae shuts his eyes and Luhan sees his lips moving. Thankfully, after another shake, Jongdae looks back at him and tries to smile. "I'm sorry hyung.. I -I thought I heard something." 

Luhan pushes Jongdae to lie back down and encircles his arm around his waist. "You saw them didn't you?"

Jongdae stiffens but doesn't say anything. Luhan sighs, "you can tell me Jongdae... remember? I promised that I won't go anywhere."

Jongdae takes a small breath and looks at Luhan with frightened eyes. He nods his head and whispers, "They're still here."

Luhan freezes and can't help but look around the room to see what Jongdae sees. He sees nothing and he doesn't know if that's worse. He looks at Jongdae again and tries to give him an encouraging smile.

"Well don't listen to them... just look at me... listen to only my voice." he says hugging Jongdae close to him.

Jongdae nods his head but Luhan can still feel him slightly shivering and Jongdae soon covers his ears with his hands. He starts to whimper and Luhan hugs him even tighter, whispering soothing and loving words.

Luhan doesn't know how long they laid there like this but all of a sudden Jongdae relaxes and quietly says, "I don't hear them anymore." Luhan lets go of Jongdae, ignoring the numbness in his right arm and lets Jongdae slowly sit up.

Jongdae looks hesitantly around the room and breathes a large sigh of relief when he sees that they're alone. "They're gone," he says to Luhan with a smile. Luhan wants to cry when he sees the relief in his boyfriend's eyes. "That's good baby... I told you it'll be okay."

Jongdae lies back down and snuggles into the covers, "But they'll be back... they always come back."

Luhan pinches Jongdae's cheek and shakes his head, "Well if they come back, just come find me. I'll help you make them go away."

"You promise?" 

"Duh, and if I'm not with you... just call me on my cell phone!" Luhan says gesturing to his phone on the desk. "I don't really use it anyways so I'm sure it's charged fully."

Jongdae nods his head and closes his eyes, "Mhm okay hyung... but hyung... can we sleep? I'm sort of sleepy."

Luhan laughs, "Of course you sleepy head. Let's sleep." Luhan brings the blanket closer to their faces, he nudges Jongdae's nose with his and whispers, "But you need to stop leaving me all alone in the mornings and sleeping on the couch, I feel cold without you."

Jongdae shakes his head, "I don't like sleeping in the bed hyunggieee.. but it's okay when I fall asleep with you."

"Well I'm going to make sure to not let you go this time, I'll wrap you around with my arms and legs if I have to," Luhan says teasingly as he starts to envelop Jongdae into a giant hug.

Luhan hears Jongdae giggle underneath the blankets and Luhan smiles, happy that Jongdae's melodious laughter had returned. He feels like it's been ages since he's heard it. He closes his eyes and tries to sleep not really caring that it was only mid afternoon. He could sleep whenever and forever if it meant that Jongdae would be in his arms always. 

~

Jong-in stalks into Baekhyun's room and flops down on Baekhyun's bed, waking the older boy. 

"Hyung... why didn't you tell me?" Jong-in says angrily when Baekhyun looks at him with sleepy eyes. Baekhyun takes a few seconds before realizing what Jong-in's talking about. 

"Ah Jong-innie.... don't worry about it. Jongdae will be fine." Baekhyun says rolling over and hoping that Jong-in would drop the subject.

"No. I can't not worry hyung. It's Jongdae-hyung. My jongdae-hyung. How can I just sit around and pretend like nothing's wrong." Jong-in says grabbing Baekhyun's arm.

Baekhyun sighs in frustration. He yanks his arm out of Jong-in's grasp. "Drop it Jong-in. Stop talking about all this. You don't know anything and you don't need to know anything, " he snaps.

Jong-in flinches, "Hyung.. how can you say that?? to me... especially... how can you not tell me?" 

Baekhyun sighs, immediately regretting his words when he ses the sadness in Jong-in's eyes. He curses himself, forgetting how Jong-in was. Though Jong-in was incredibly short-tempered the rest of the members knew that he was also the most sensitive and easiest to feel hurt. He just hides his sadness behind his anger. 

"I'm .. I'm sorry Jong-in.. you know I didn't mean it." Baekhyun says quietly as he runs his fingers through his hair. "I'm just so tired."

Jong-in bites his lip, trying not to cry. He scoots closer to Baekhyun. "Just tell me... what I should do? I can help I promise. I can help with Jongdae-hyung. I helped him alot this year, always making him laugh with Sehunnie... and and I give him hugs all the time."

Baekhyun smiles as he watches the younger boy look at him with hopefully eyes. It breaks his heart to see how much Jong-in cares. He knows that Jong-in loves Jongdae, maybe past the normal hyung-dongsaeng relationship but he doesn't want to push it. He isn't sure Jongdae will ever recover and he already sees the toll it took on Jong-in last year.

"I know you do... and it's great.. but Jonginnie... I don't think we can help him completely... only Luhan-hyung can."

Jong-in curls his fingers into a fist, "I hate him... I hate Luhan-hyung," he hisses quietly. "How could he do this to him?" Jong-in feels tears fall down his cheeks but he ignores them.

"Jongdae-hyung would be fine.. if it wasn't for him. It's always Luhan-hyung for Jongdae-hyung and I don't know why... why can't it.... why can't it.. why can't it be me?" he says quietly before his voice cracked.

Baekhyun reaches out for Jong-in's hand but the younger boy stands up from the bed and backs away. "Jong-in.. don't say that. You don't mean it."

Jong-in shakes his head stubbornly and raises his voice, yelling "No I mean it.. I mean it more than anything in this world. Luhan hyung I hate him... I HATE HIM! He messed everything up and now... now Jongdae-hyung is...." 

Baekhyun shushes him, "shh Jongin stop yelling, I don't need the others to hear. You don't want them to worry. Please Jong-in. It'll be alright. I promise!"

"Stop... stop promising me things ... everyone keeps promising .. and no one ever keeps it," Jong-in says now crying. "Jongdae-hyung promised that he was okay, Luhan-hyung promised.. and now look where we are? LOOK WHERE WE ARE ING ARE!" 

"STOP IT JONG-IN!" Chanyeol yells through the doorway. He walks in and grabs Jong-in by the shoulder. "Stop saying these things. We're all trying okay? trying our best! Look at Baekhyun... how can you say such things when he's right there?" 

Jong-in looks away but Chanyeol forces him to look at Baekhyun who has lowered his head. Jong-in stops struggling and is sniffling when he realizes that Baekhyun is quietly sobbing. Chanyeol lets go of Jong-in with a sigh and goes to sit next to Baekhyun, letting Baekhyun lean on him and cry.

Jong-in just stands there, too stubborn to apologize but feeling like a total . He curses himself silently, his temper always gets the better of him but he still meant what he said. If luhan-hyung hadn't come his Jongdae-hyung would be fine. He would be the Jongdae-hyung that Jong-in could count on; he would be the Jongdae-hyung that he loved. He rubbed his eyes angrily and hesitated before walking over and accepting Chanyeol's outstretched hand. He slowly sat down and leaned over to grab Baekhyun's hand. "I'm sorry hyung," he says softly as he feels another wave of tears leave his eyes.

Baekhyun shakes his head, still crying. "Don’t be Jong-innie.. don't ever be sorry. I used to think the same... but... but Jongdae loves him so much that how can we hate him?"

"We don't hate him... we're just angry.. and sad." Chanyeol says grabbing both of them in a hug. "But we're a family and a family always sticks together and that's what we have to do for Jongdae. We just have to be there for him and ride out this storm."

"We'll get through it... we always do." Kyungsoo says quietly from the doorway. Chanyeol gives smiles at Kyungsoo thankfully and nods his head, ignoring the tears in both of their eyes. 

Because we're a family. 

~

December 23rd

Jongdae wakes up before the sun has risen and he sighs, trying to stretch his sore back. He lies here on the couch for a few seconds, staring up at the familiar patterns on the ceiling. It's been a long time since he's woken up in his own bedroom but he wants it to be that way. He gets nightmares whenever he sleeps in his own room and so he always sneaks out in the middle of the night, leaving Luhan behind in the warm bed.

He glances at his phone and smiles when he ses that there's just one more day till their Christmas Eve performance. Usually he's worried whenever they perform any of their mandarin versions live but he had been practicing a lot, secretly. He had purposely done badly in front of Luhan because he wanted to surprise his boyfriend with his almost flawless pronunciation now (well at least according to Yixing). He can imagine the bright smile on Luhan's face and Jongdae doesn't think that there could be anything more beautiful to see. He rolls off the couch and waddles into the kitchen. It's been a while since he had cooked but he wanted to do something for the members because they had all been taking good care of him. 

He starts to hum as he starts to whip up a simple yet delicious breakfast. When he's just about finished with the soup and egg rolls, he hears the rest of the M members walk into the kitchen. "Breakfasts almost ready guys!" he says with a smile.

Minseok raises his eyebrows, "Oh Jongdae? You're making us breakfast?"

Tao smiles and runs up to hug Jongdae from behind, "Ge is the best!"

Kris scrunches up his nose, "Are you sure it's safe?"

Before Jongdae could make a comment, Yixing grabs Kris into a headlock, "Don't listen to him Jongdae, duizhang is just being his normal grumpy self."

Kris snorts and tries to get out of the headlock, but Yixing's one of the strongest members and all Kris had was his height, "Hey.... can we please remember that I'm the leader?"

"Used to be the leader," Tao interrupts.

Kris frowns, "I'm still the leader amongst us and in dorms so ... don't get too cocky Tao-zi or else I won't give you your gift!"

Tao starts to whine and Jongdae laughs before shoving an egg roll into his mouth, "No fighting! Not today guys! Let's just be happy and all eat together okay? It's been a while!"

Yixing glances up at Jongdae and can't help but smile when he sees how happy Jongdae seems to be, "Yes I guess it has been a long time. Let's all eat then!"

Jongdae places the food on the table and quickly takes off his apron, "Alright! I'll go wake up Luhan and then we all can eat together like usual!"

"Ah, Jongdae... maybe we should let Luhan sleep... didn't you say he was sick yesterday?" Minseok says hesitantly, not looking at Jongdae.

Jongdae shakes his head playfully, "Nah I was just lying, he's alright and he basically almost killed me when he found out that I lied. I'll go get him."

Kris is about to protest when Yixing put a hand on his shoulder, "Let him ... just let him do what he wants," he says quietly.

Kris frowns, "We shouldn't keep doing this, pretending like nothing's wrong."

Minseok clears his throat, "We aren't pretending... we just can't, not now ... please Kris. Just let it be."

Kris bites his lip, he didn't want to keep this up but he trusted and respected Minseok. Before they could continue their conversation, Jongdae walks back in dragging in a sleepy Luhan.

"Yay now everyone's here! Let's start eating!" Jongdae says bringing a chair for Luhan.

The boys nods their heads in agreement and quietly says good morning to Luhan. Luhan leans on Jongdae's shoulder and pouts. His headache's getting worse and he isn't really hungry. He actually hasn't been hungry for what seems like days but Jongdae had insisted that he come to the "family" breakfast.

Jongdae kisses him on the forehead and puts some food on his plate. "Alright Luhan-hyung. You better eat this all!"

Luhan shakes his head but he picks up his fork when he sees the pout that has graced Jongdae's face. He starts to slowly eat and the rest of the members also start to eat.

After a few minutes of quiet eating, Jongdae's already become bored. "Guys! Why aren't we talking!!! Don't be boring!" 

"It's cause the food is so delicious Jongdae-ya!" Kris saysteasingly.

Luhan chokes on his food, trying not to laugh when he sees the goofy grin on Kris's face. Yixing also starts to laugh while Minseok just rolled his eyes. 

"Well if no one else is going to say anything, I may as well tell you guys what I bought yesterday at the mall!" Tao says happily cutting up his bacon. "I bought a lot of things and I've matched it up already."

Kris groans, "Oh god... this is going to be long especially since he bought like 20 pairs of boxers and socks and who knows what else!"

The rest of the members laugh while Tao starts to pelt Kris with pieces of bacon. Yixing leans back on his chair and glances at s. It had been such a long time since they had eaten together like this, it was almost like before.... almost. He glances over at Jongdae and smiles when he sees how animated Jongdae is talking to Luhan. Whenever Jongdae was truly happy or his smile was really genuine there would be a dimple in Jongdae's right cheek and it was there right now. He glances over at Minseok sitting across from his and sees that he's looking at Jongdae with a small smile. Minseok turns and catches Yixing's eye and they knew they both were thinking the same thing. Why couldn't it have been like this forever? 

They're almost finished with their breakfast when they hear the door open and the K members run in, yelling for them to hurry up. 

"Seriously guys... we aren't like you guys! We're always ready.... fed and ready!" Kris says as he slaps away Chanyeol's hand from his plate.

Chanyeol pouts and rubs his hand, "It's not our fault that our resident cook never wants to wake up in the mornings."

Kyungsoo smacks Chanyeol on the head before leaning over Yixing's shoulder and grabbing a piece of bacon. "You're more than welcome to eat cereal and milk! I'm not your mother!"

Joonmyun puts his shoulder over Kyungsoo, "No one's complaining Kyungsoo-yah. We're just jealous."

Tao smiles and points at Jongdae, "It's all because of Jongdae-ge. He got up early and made us all this delicious breakfast!" 

Jongdae blushes, not wanting to make a big deal out of it. Luhan smiles and pats him on the leg. "don't pretend to be shy!"

Jong-in who looked half asleep, perks up at the mention of Jongdae. "Of course Jongdae-hyung would. He's the best you know!"

"Alright guys let's break up this little love fest, we need to get going!" Baekhyun says going into Jongdae's room and grabbing a jacket for Jongdae. "Jongdae wear this one today okay? It's really cold out!"

Jongdae rolls his eyes but accepts the jacket, "Yes mother! Anyways Luhan hyung is feeling better so maybe he can come with us to the recording today!"

Baekhyun stops zipping up his jacket, not knowing what to say. "U-um I don't think that’s a good idea Jongdae."

Jongdae frowns, "Why not?"

Baekhyun doesn't know what to say but thankfully Kris speaks up, "Because Jongdae-ah we already told the manager that he wasn't going to do any recordings till tomorrow because he was sick so they planned it for just the 11 of us." 

"Well he can still come and watch," Jongdae says stubbornly.

Luhan squeezes Jongdae's arm and shakes his head, "It's okay Jongdae... I'll just get bored watching you guys ... I'll just stay at home and rest and be all ready for tomorrow!"

Jongdae sighs, "Are you sure hyung? You won't be lonely?"

Luhan smiles, "Of course I will be lonely, but I can't keep you all to myself forever! You go and do an awesome job! Make me a proud boyfriend!"

Jongdae rolls his eyes mockingly, "Aren't I already an awesome boyfriend?" He glances back at the rest of the members who had been staring intently. "Alright then I guess we should get going!"

A giant sigh of relief escapes from the member's lips and Baekhyun realizes that he had been holding his breath the whole time. He quickly puts a smile on his face and says "Let's go!"

Jong-in skips over and grabs Jongdae's hand, dragging him to the door. He starts to help Jongdae get ready for the cold, fussing over every part of his outfit. "Yah Kim Jong-in, I'm the hyung here!" Jongdae says with a laugh.

Jong-in sticks out his tongue, "Well it's not my fault that my hyung is acts more like a cute little maknae!" 

Jongdae laughs and grabs Jong-in for a hug. "What would I do without you Jonginnie. You're a good little dongsaeng!"

Jong-in wraps his arms around Jongdae, happy that he had Jongdae close to him. "You would cry and whine and be miserable without me." 

"That is true... but I dunno about the crying. I'm not much of a crier!" Jongdae says trying to sound manly.

"Yeah ... such a manly man you are," Jong-in says, reaching over to grab Baekhyun's bright pink scarf and tying it around Jongdae. "The manliest!"

The rest of the members had already gone down and Jongdae looks over and blows a kiss at Luhan. "See you soon Luhannie! I miss you already!"

Luhan laughs,"Don't forget to call if anything happens alright?"

Jongdae smiles and shoots him a love arrow, "I promise! See you soon! Love you!"

"I love you too," Luhan says softly as Jong-in pulls Jongdae out the door. 

~

Recording went smoothly, which was becoming a common occurrence. Everyone's spirits were high and no one had seen Jongdae so happy. "Because everything is perfect!" Jongdae would reply whenever someone asked him why he was so happy.

Their manager was constantly asking Joonmyun and Kris about what had made Jongdae change suddenly. Joonmyun just shrugged his shoulders, not wanting to reveal much. "He's just being his normal self!"

"Well whatever is going on, its working. I'm glad... we need him in perfect form for Show Champion special tomorrow," their manager said as they walked to their car.

"What do you mean Show champion," Jongdae suddenly asked from behind them. The three of them whirled around to see Jongdae looking at them with a confused expression.

The manager just laughed, "Jongdae have you not been keeping up with the schedules? We have the Show Champion scheduled tomorrow. You guys are going to release your new single remember?"

Jongdae tilted his head, "What do you mean? Why aren't we performing Miracles of December in mandarin? That was the plan?"

The manager raised his eyebrow, "What are you talking about? Why would we promote the mandarin version? and what schedule are you talking about?"

Jongdae frowned, "What are you talking about? Luhan-hyung and I have been practicing, don't tell me we aren't doing it!"

"Lu-..what are you,,," the manager started to say but was dragged away by Joonmyun.

Kris grabbed Jongdae's hand and pulled the boy away to the other side of the lot. "Jongdae.. let's just come here for a second okay?"

Jongdae pulled his hand out of Kris's grasp, frowning. "What's going on Kris-hyung? What's manager hyung talking about?"

Kris sighed, trying to figure out how to tell Jongdae," Jongdae... listen. You guys aren't performing that song tomorrow anymore."

"Why?? Why not? Why did this change all of a sudden?" Jongdae said taking a step back. He ignored the snowflakes falling on his head, he was starting to get anxious.

Kris clenched his hands together, not wanting to upset Jongdae. Thankfully Baekhyun and Yixing ran up after hearing what had happened from Joonmyun.

"It's okay Jongdae. It was just a slight change of plans," Baekhyun said smiling. He tried to put his arm around Jongdae but Jongdae stepped further away.

"You... we can't do that! We can't do that now... not when it's tomorrow. I mean I've been practicing.. Luhan-hyung has been practicing. They can't just cancel on us!" Jongdae said voice starting to waver.

"Jongdae-yah.. it's okay. I'm sure you guys will have another chance later," Yixing said calmly. He slowly started to walk over to the younger boy, not wanting to frighten him.

Jongdae just shook his head, closing his eyes, "No... no this can't be happening... Luhan hyung is going to be disappointed... I-I practice so hard... I was going to make him proud."

"He's already proud of you, Jongdae... he'll be alright," Yixing said encircling his arm around Jongdae's waist. "I would know, I am his best friend at all."

Jongdae slowly glanced up at Yixing, "Really? Even with my ty pronunciation and mood swings these days... he still said that?"

Yixing almost faltered before smiling and nodding his head. He hated lying to Jongdae but he didn't have a choice and he wasn't lying entirely... Luhan had said it before.

Baekhyun walked over to Jongdae's other side and put an arm around his shoulder. "Now let's go home okay?" 

Jongdae was about to nod when suddenly he saw something from the corner of his eye. It was the old woman and she was pointing and laughing at him.

"They're lying to you kid... and you're too dense to see it! so naive you are!" a voice said from the other side and Jongdae whirled around to see the boy sitting on a bench behind Kris. 

The old woman laughed, "Always left out aren't you? No one thinks you can handle it and here they are babying you.. lying to you. Like your a five year old."

Jongdae stepped back, eyes widening as the boy got up and started walking over to him.

"When are you going to wake up Jongdae? and see the truth!" the boy said viciously. Jongdae gulped and started to walk backwards, ignoring the calls from his fellow members.

"Poor boy will always be like this... it's mean to be. He's not meant to be happy," the old woman said suddenly appearing right in front of Jongdae.

Jongdae yelped and fell backwards, hitting his head on the hard cement.

The rest of the members who had walked out saw Jongdae fall and started to yell running towards him. Baekhyun and Yixing started to run as well, worry filling their eyes. 

Jongdae pushed himself back up and blinked multiple times, hoping that they would disappear. 

"We aren't going anywhere dearie. It's almost time you know? Why would we miss the show!" the old woman said laughing. 

Baekhyun was almost to Jongdae when he saw Jongdae start to shake and before he knew it Jongdae started to sprint out of the parking lot.

"... someone grab him!" Baekhyun yelled starting to run as fast as he can. Jong-in and Sehun started to run as fast as they can but they were too far away to be much help. Yixing had already started sprinting and Baekhyun almost thought that he could catch him but Jongdae ran into the middle of traffic and barely missed getting hit by a car before disappearing around the corner.

"!" Yixing yelled doubling over coughing. Baekhyun caught up to him and started to pat Yixing on the back while trying to see if he could still see Jongdae.

The rest of the members had caught up to them by the time Yixing had caught his breath. Kyungsoo was huffing and puffing, eyes wide. "Tell me he's okay? Tell me he didn't run away."

Baekhyun gulped and shook his head sadly. "I don't know what happened... he seemed to be okay but then it was like he saw something that scared the out of him."

Jong-in started to take off his jacket, ignoring the freezing cold. "We need to find him... we need to go look for him now! Who knows where he could be..."

The rest of the boys nodded their heads in agreement and were starting to get ready when Joonmyun told them to wait.

"We need to be smart about this, this is Jongdae we're talking about. There are only a few places where he could go that he would feel safe. We should split up like that."

"Good idea Joonmyun," Kris said. "Some of us should go to his parent's house and some to his old school and some to the old park and some back to dorms."

They had soon set off in groups and Baekhyun found himself riding back to dorms with Minseok and Sehun. When they arrived, they ran into the M dorms and almost yelled in despair when they found it empty. They checked the K dorm just in case but it was empty as well. 

"What do we do now?" Sehun said sadly as he sat down on the couch.

"We should wait... he's bound to come back." Minseok said hopefully as he paced around the living room. 

Baekhyun frowned, he couldn't just sit back and wait. He had to find Jongdae. Jongdae was his responsibility. He couldn't just around and do nothing. He was just about to head back downstairs when the door swung open and a wet Jongdae ran into the room.

"Where is he?" Jongdae yelled not bothering to close the door. "Where is he?" he yelled again.

Baekhyun froze as he looked at Jongdae. He could see that Jongdae was shivering and he didn't want to know where those new bruises on his arm had come from. Jongdae had left his jacket behind and Baekhyun saw the splotches of red on his arms and face. But what scared him the most was the look in Jongdae's eyes. They were wild and hazy but Baekhyun saw the terror in them. Jongdae wasn't himself anymore.

Minseok tried first, "Jongdae... calm down. Let's get you warm."

"No! get away from me! Tell me where he is!" Jongdae screamed walking into the living room. Baekhyun noticed that Jongdae was holding onto this cell phone.

"Who are you looking for Jongdae-hyung?" Sehun said slowly as he walked closer to Jongdae.

Jongdae whirled around and glared at him. "Who else but Luhan-hyung. He's not picking up his phone and I keep calling and calling but he isn't answering. Why isn't he answering!?"

Baekhyun's heart plummeted when he watched Jongdae run into each room looking for Luhan. "Jongdae.. please.. let me take care of you okay?"

Jongdae let out a loud laugh, "What? What are you going to do huh? Just give me Luhan hyung and it'll be all right Baekhyun. If you're not going to help me than get out of my way!"

"We'll help you Jongdae.. I promise. Let's just look at those cuts okay?" Minseok said as he grabbed a blanket from the couch, "You're freezing... let's get you warm."

Jongdae stopped and blinked his eyes for a few seconds. His head started spinning and he shook his head trying to get it to stop. "I can't.. I need to find him..."

"He's downstairs Jongdae.. Luhan-hyung is downstairs." Baekhyun said walking over to Jongdae's other side and slowly grabbing his arm. "Let's just calm down and we'll get him for you okay?"

"THEY'RE LIARS! ALL OF THEM ARE LIARS!" the boy screamed from the doorway, causing Jongdae to jump backwards.

"Are you going to let them take away Luhan from you huh boy? Are you that weak?" the old woman said walking in.

Jongdae shook his head frantically, trying to get away from them. "Get away... get away from me! All of you get away from me!"

Minseok and Baekhyun looked at each other confused. "Who-what are you talking about?"

Jongdae glanced up at them terrified. "No no no this isn't happening. None of you guys are real. Get away from me.. JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!" he screamed as he ran towards the bathroom.

Sehun sprinted after him, but he was a second too late and Jongdae has slammed the door shut, locking it. 

The boys started to bang on the door, "Jongdae.. open the door.. please Jongdae we're only trying to help... Jongdae please open the door!" they said frantically.

Jongdae backed away from the door and covered his ears. The boy and old woman's voices kept invading his ears and he didn't want to listen to them anymore. He didn't want to listen to anyone anymore. He wanted to be alone.. He just wanted Luhan. 

Luhan-hyung promised me that he would be here and make them go away... where is he? why isn't he picking up his phone! Jongdae thought as he dialed Luhan's phone number again. He almost screamed when it went straight to voicemail, just like it had done the past hundred times Jongdae had called in the past hour.

He flung the cell phone at the door, breaking it. He grabbed his hair and started to sob. "Where is he? Where's Luhannie..... why did he leave me alone?" he sobbed.

"Because he doesn't love you anymore," a voice said mockingly and Jongdae looked up to see the boy sitting on top of the sink.

"Shut up," Jongdae said quietly."

"Can't accept the truth can you?" the boy said with a roll of his eyes. "You're so pathetic."

"Shut up!" Jongdae said a little louder as he got up. "Just leave me alone."

The boy just smiled, "If only it was that easy... but it's not so I guess you're stuck with me. You only have us anyways."

Jongdae felt his anger returning and he walked over to the boy near the sink. "I mean it.... you need to leave me alone."

"Make me," the boy said with a grin.

Jongdae didn't even think before slamming his fist into the boy's face. Blood struck his face and he thought that he had hit his target but when he opened his eyes, all he saw was a broken mirror and his bloody fist.

"Pathetic!" the boy said lazily, now sitting inside the bathtub. "You can't even make out what's real and what's not!" 

"Stop talking!" Jongdae yelled as he charged the boy again. He missed again and now had a giant bruise on his shoulder.

"You can't do anything right can you? No wonder Luhan left you? He left a loser!" the boy started to yell. Jongdae whirled around trying to find him in the small bathroom but he couldn't.

Though he couldn't see the boy anymore, the voices were still there, telling him he was pathetic and miserable. 

"Shut up SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!" Jongdae yelled as he started to fling anything he could all around the bathroom and started to hit anything he could see. "JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!"

~

When they first heard the glass break, Baekhyun knew that they couldn't do this anymore. 

"Call Joonmyun... call him now!" he said looking at Sehun. Sehun nodded and ran into the living room to call their leader.

They could hear more yells and things breaking inside the bathroom and Baekhyun looked over to see Minseok with a pained expression.

"It's too late," he whispered. "We can't..we can't do this anymore."

Baekhyun flung himself on the door again but it was no use. "No we can't give up now. Not now! He will be alright."

Minseok looked over at him and Baekhyun was almost afraid that Minseok had given but Minseok just said, "We need to break in... now. I'm going to go find something." 

Baekhyun nodded, his heart breaking when he heard another pained cry from inside the bathroom. We need to hurry... Jongdae.. he needs us.

Meanwhile....

Luhan didn't hear anything at first. He had spent the morning finishing his novel and was planning on reading another one when he felt another one of those splitting headaches. He was fast asleep when he heard a faint yell from outside. He ignored it first but the yelling continued and Luhan slowly started to wake up and when he thought he recognized it.

Luhan sat up right in bed and tried to listen but the noise had stopped. He sighed and glanced at the clock on the bed. It was almost dinnertime and he frowned, wondering why Jongdae hadn't come back. 

He could've at least called me Luhan thought as he looked around for his phone. He didn't remember using it so he assumed that it would be on his desk. He walked over and frowned when he couldn't find it. He opened the drawers and in the last drawer he found his phone in a small box.

What's this doing here? he thought as he took his phone out. He tried to turn it on but the battery was dead.  why isn't it charged? Luhan started to worry when he realized that Jongdae might have been calling him and now he realized his phone was switched off. He quickly put on a jacket, deciding that he should go over to the company building and meet Jongdae there. 

He was just about to walk out of his room when he heard a yell above him. This time it was clear and Luhan froze when he realized that it was Jongdae. 

He started to sprint up the stairs knowing that it had to have come from the K dorm, there was no other apartment above them. The door was open and Luhan ran in and saw Sehun frantically calling someone on the phone.

"you need to hurry hyung... please... it's bad!" Sehun was saying.

Luhan was going to ask him what was wrong when he heard glass breaking and looked to see Baekhyun and Minseok banging on the door.

He ran over just as Minseok and Baekhyun walked away, talking about grabbing something to break down the door.

Luhan started to bang the door, yelling for Jongdae. 

"Jongdae baby? baby open the door? I'm here...." Luhan yelled banging. He could hear someone moving around the bathroom and something else crash down on the floor.

"Jongdae?? JONGDAE are you okay?" Luhan screamed starting to get frantic. "Please open the door? PLEASE open the door!" 

Luhan waited to see if Jongdae would respond but there was no response. He was just about to bang when he heard a small voice call out to him.

"Luhan?" Jongdae said quietly from behind the door.

Luhan slid down to the floor since that's where the sound came from. "Jongdae? jongdae I’m here."

"Where were you luhan? I was looking for you... I was calling you so many times," Jongdae said starting to cry.

Luhan touched the door, as if trying to reach for Jongdae, "I'm sorry Jongdae... my phone .. it's not working. I'm sorry I didn't come."

Luhan heard Jongdae talk to someone in the bathroom and Luhan knew that Jongdae was seeing things again. "Jongdae baby? baby just open the door please?"

"They say you're going to leave me... leave me all alone." Jongdae said.

"No... no I won't I promise," Luhan said now openly crying with worry.

Jongdae started to argue with someone and Luhan started to knock on the door not wanting to lose Jongdae.

"Jongdae Jongdae? Ignore them... jongdae please.. just listen to me... just listen to my voice." Luhan said desperately.

There was no response but at least he didn't hear any talking. Luhan took a shaky breath and slowly started, "Jongdae remember how you said you loved when we sang together? let's do it now... let's sing our favorite okay? your favorite lullaby?"

Luhan started to sing, hoping that it would calm Jongdae down... at least enough for him to let Luhan in. He had never heard Jongdae sound so scared.

He kept singing and had almost decided that it wasn't going to work when he heard Jongdae softly join him, just in time for his favorite verse. Luhan smiled through his tears and sang a bit louder, hoping that Jongdae would copy him.

Jongdae did start to sing louder and Luhan looked back to see Baekhyun and Minseok and Sehun looking at them. He gave them a smile and turned back to look at the door. They finished the lullaby together and there was silence.

"Jongdae? open the door please... i'm here.. just open the door."

Luhan held his breath but soon he heard the door click open and it started to slowly open, revealing a bloodied Jongdae. Jongdae cried out when he saw Luhan sitting on the floor and collapsed down next to him.

Luhan set his Jongdae's head on his lap and tried to smile at him. "Hey...?" he said softly his head.

Jongdae looked at him with bloodshot eyes, "Luhannie.. you're here."

"Always.. Jongdae.. I'll always be here," Luhan said bending down to kiss him on the forehead.

Luhan was so focused on Jongdae that he didn't hear some of the other members come into the dorm. He didn't hear them whispering behind him and he didn't hear them decide that they had to take Jongdae.

He only realized when he saw Minseok and Kris grab Jongdae by the arms. "Hey what are you guys doing?" Luhan said looking at them as Jongdae started to realize what was going on.

Jongdae immediately started to struggle when they started to drag him towards the living room, away from Luhan.

"Luhan.. luhan .. what's happening.. Luhan why are they taking me away?" Jongdae started to yell trying to reach out for Luhan.

Luhan jumped to his feet and started to run towards them, trying to stop them. "Leave him alone.. he's okay now.. I can help him... guys just leave him alone.

"We need to take him to the hospital Kris," Minseok said as he tried to hold down Jongdae's arms.

Kris grunted as Jongdae kicked him in the shin, "No not like this.. we need to calm him down. Baekhyun went to go get the medicine from the cabinet downstairs."

Sehun was trying to calm down Jongdae down. "Hyung.. hyung just relax please... just calm down hyung.. we're only trying to help!" 

Jongdae was now screaming, trying to reach out for Luhan. Luhan was trying to get Kris and Minseok off of Jongdae but he couldn't do it. He was feeling so weak that he couldn't even push them away.

"Leave him alone guys.. you're scaring him.. just leave him alone."

Baekhyun ran into the room, "Got it.. bring him into the kitchen!" he said.

Kris and Minseok and Sehun started to lift the screaming and kicking Jongdae and take him to the kitchen. "LET GO OF MEE!!! LET GO OF ME STOP IT! LEAVE ME ALONE!" Jongdae screamed as he tried to get away. "Luhan-hyung help me!"

Luhan was crying and he tried to reach out for Jongdae when he felt a sharp pain at the back of his head. "Urgh!" he said as he grabbed the back of his head. The pain was so bad that Luhan started to see bright spots in his vision. He fell down on his knees, trying to not scream. He blinked his eyes but saw his vision start to get foggy.

"Jongdae.. jongdaeee." he said as he tried to reach out for Jongdae. He felt incredibly weak and he started to see the darkness surround his vision.

The last thing he heard was Jongdae shouting his name before he out. 

~

When Luhan came to, he was still on the floor. It took him a few seconds to orient himself but then he remembered Jongdae and looked around. There wasn’t anybody in the kitchen but he could hear voices coming from the bedroom. He struggled to get up but he slowly walked over.

He felt so weak that he had to lean on the doorway when he got there. He tried to blink away the dizziness but was relieved when he saw Jongdae lying there on the bed. He looked like he was sleeping. He looked around the room and saw Baekhyun, Kris, Minseok, Jong-in, Sehun and Tao there as well. They seemed to be talking but Luhan couldn’t hear anything apart from the ringing in his ears.

Baekhyun and Kris and Minseok started to come out of the room and Luhan could hear them talking about going to get Joonmyun and the rest.

“Take care of him, Jonginnie. We’ll be right back,” Baekhyun said before they walked out of the door.

Luhan was now terribly confused at what was going on. He watched Jong-in sit down on the bed and start to Jongdae’s hair. Luhan tried to get up but he realized that he couldn’t move anymore. His arms and legs had become numb. What’s going on? He thought as he tried again.

Luhan kept trying until he was too exhausted to try anymore. Sehun and Tao had gone to the kitchen to grab some water but Jong-in stayed by Jongdae’s side. Luhan couldn’t help but feel jealous as Jong-in Jongdae’s hair.

That’s what I’m supposed to do he thought angrily.

He sat there watching the two when suddenly Jongdae started to stir awake. He saw Jong-in freeze and softly call out for Sehun and Tao, who came running back in.

Luhan almost sighed with relief when he saw Jongdae’s eyes flutter open. He didn’t know what they had done but he was just happy that Jongdae was awake and was back with him,

“Jonginnie?” Jongdae said still not awake fully.

Jong-in smiled and put his hand to Jongdae’s cheek. “Yes hyung?”

“Where’s Luhan?” Jongdae said weakly.

Jong-in froze and brought his hand back.

“Where’s Luhan?” Jongdae asked again, this time a bit stronger. Sehun and Tao looked at each other not sure of what to say.

“Hyung… Luhan-hyung’s not here right now,” Jong-in said finally as he helped Jongdae sit up.

Jongdae frowned and looked around the room. “Where is he?”

Tao tried to put on a smile, “Ah Luhan-ge he.. he just went out to grab something to eat for us.”

Jongdae looked at him, “You’re lying Tao-zi… why are you lying?”

Tao stiffened, not sure what to say now.

Jong-in tried to hold Jongdae’s hand, “Hyung he’s not lying. Luhan-hyung is coming back.”

Jongdae glared at Jong-in. “and you’re lying too.” He said as he got up from the bed. He looked at all three of them. “Why are you all lying to me?”

Jong-in slowly got up as Sehun and Tao walked closer to Jongdae. “Hyung we aren’t lying. Hyung you should lie back down…. You’re not feeling very well.”

“I am feeling ing perfectly alright, Kai,” Jongdae said viciously. Jong-in flinched at that, Jongdae never called him by his stage name.

Sehun and Tao gulped, both preparing themselves to hold onto Jongdae. This wasn’t their Jongdae hyung anymore.

“Now get the out of my way… I need to find Luhan.” Jongdae said dangerously as he started to walk towards the door.

Luhan who had been shocked by the change in Jongdae’s character tried to call out to him but Jongdae couldn’t see or hear him.

“Jongdae Jongdae I’m right here! Jongdae!” Luhan tried to say even though no sound came out.

“Hyung, stop … don’t get riled up.. it’s just the medicine. You need to sleep and rest.. the medicine won’t help you otherwise,” Jong-in said walking over next to Sehun and Tao.

Jongdae rolled his eyes, “I’m sick of this medicine… just get out of my way. I need to find Luhan hyung.” He walked forward and tried to push them out of the way.

“Get away,” he said furiously trying to get past the three taller boys.

The three boys started to grab onto Jongdae as he started to fling his arms around.

“Tao, call them back… get Yixing and Kris and everyone,” Jong-in said as he grabbed onto Jongdae’s arms tighter.

Tao hesitated for a second but a second glance from Jong-in made him run out towards the phone.

Jongdae was now furious and was starting to punch and kick the two boys. “ I said get off me! GET OFF OF ME! I NEED TO GO TO LUHAN HYUNG! WHERE IS HE!”

Jong-in and Sehun struggled to hold him, not wanting to hurt their hyung, knowing he wasn’t in the right mind. A well aimed punched to Sehun’s face caused Sehun to double over in pain and Jong-in had no choice but to wrestle Jongdae to the ground.

"Dont hurt him!" Luhan yelled but it was no use.

“Hyung stop it.. please stop it,” Jong-in said desperately as Jongdae tried to claw at his face.

“Get off of me Kim ing Kai.. GET OFF OF ME! I need to get to Luhan!” Jongdae screamed.

Jong-in already tired and now in pain started to lose it, “You can’t hyung.. YOU CAN’T get to Luhan!”

Jongdae ignored him and continued to struggle, shouting obscenities at Jong-in. Sehun struggled to get to them but his eye was in terrible pain. Sehun was starting to get more afraid because he could see Jong-in getting angrier and angrier.

“Jong-in don’t,” he tried to say but Jongdae had started to scream for Luhan when Jong-in had finally had enough.

“You can’t see Luhan hyung.. because luhan hyung is dead… he’s ing dead!” Jong-in screamed as he put all his weight on top of Jongdae.

Everyone froze when those words came out of his mouth and Luhan almost choked. He couldn’t breath… he didn’t understand what Jong-in was saying.

“How can I be dead? I’m right here.. I’m right here Jongdae.. RIGHT HERE!” he yelled as he watched Jongdae’s face fall.

Sehun tried to stop Jong-in but Jong-in kept going. “He’s dead hyung… you can’t see him because he’s dead and he’s not coming back…. So please just come back… come back to us!” Jong-in said holding onto Jongdae.

Jongdae had grown still ever since Jong-in had started yelling and all he did was keep staring into Jong-in’s teary eyes.

“You’re lying,” he hissed quietly.

Jong-in shook his head, tears falling. “Hyung, I wish I was lying.. but I’m not and you need to know this… please.. we can’t keep doing this.”

Luhan was starting to freak out, he kept trying to call out to Jongdae.. to Jong-in … to Sehun.. but no one was answering back… no one could hear him.

Luhan could only watch as Jongdae keep protesting and Jong-in keep repeating that he, Luhan, was dead.

“No no no no no no… it can’t be,” Jongdae said quietly as tears started to fall from his eyes.

Luhan cursed every bone in his body for not moving, he felt so far away from Jongdae. A loud wail broke through his frustration and Luhan watched as Jongdae started to cry uncontrollably on the ground. Jong-in and Sehun were now crying as well as they watched their favorite hyung realize what was happening.

Luhan’s heart broke even more with every cry that escaped from Jongdae’s lips and he prayed to anyone for it to stop.

“Stop … stop hurting him.. stop hurting Jongdae” he cried out to deaf ears. “Why isn’t anyone doing anything? Someone do something?”

“Well hello there,” a voice said causing Luhan to turn around. Luhan froze when he saw a boy perched on the couch next to an old lady.

The old lady laughed. “It’s been a while Luhan…. we have a lot to discuss!” she said with a smile that chilled Luhan to the bone.