Dedicated to an who broke my heart.
I hope your heart cracks every time you think of me.

----------------------

You're a bad seed.

Bad as a human could be;
'Greaser-Gangster' bad,
'-on-the-staircase' bad,
'Heartbreaker' bad.

You're a cancer-stick smoker,
Always puffing grey clouds of smoke into my face,
Filling your lungs with death everyday.

"People smoke because of stress, because of addiction.
I smoke because I want to die quicker."

"Why do you care?"  

"Baby girl, you need to stop giving a damn."

You blew the smoke over my face again;
And I coughed,
I coughed my 'little, adorable' cough,

And you smiled,
But it wasn't a smile out of joy or happiness,
It was more like your infamous smirk that was filled with

Sin,
Lust,
Amusement,
Self-hatred.

The curve of your lips nearly always taste like whiskey, 
from your grandfather's cabinet,
How the movement of your lips set my body on fire,
The flames melting my icy persona I fight so hard to keep,
to hide the real me,
Because no one can hurt you if you can't feel.

Your lips were never good,
I knew from the start when I first saw your smile,
You never last like yourself,
The whiskey and cigarette on your tongue made me feel so dizzy,
A dizzy high you crave so badly,
And I  considered myself an alcoholic if it means I can have another kiss from you.

The word 'addiction' seemed small, 
To what I feel for you,
This... T-This attraction,
This close-to-be obsession,

Is driving me to the edge.

The edge where I want to hold his hand and jump,
Fall and lose my life,
Rip my soul from my body,
To be with you forever.

And I want to hate you, 
Because you brought me so much pain,
So much evil into my life,
That hate is the only emotion I have to produce when I see you.

Your 'I love you's were a lie,
Your embrace was fake,
And you were 

My poison,
My fix,
My endless
craving,
and sadly,

My devil.