Where do feelings go once the bearer is gone?  When the reality of Luhan’s death slowly creeps into him that Monday night, Xiumin thinks – no, Luhan can’t be dead, I can still feel him, I can still feel him loving me, he is still here.

“Luhan!” He calls out into the night, into the empty field of their university. Silence. Darkness.

“Luhan!” He tries again with plea and panic in his voice. His eyes, bright with the formation of tears, are like two orbs floating in the darkness, searching and waiting for an answer.

“Luhan, Luhan,Luhan, Luhan. . “ He starts to chant to himself, eyes still fixed into the dark. In between the chanting of Luhan’s name, a sob escapes from him, wracking his shoulder then his whole body like a huge invisible force until he crumples down to the dry earth.

“Luhan,” he whispers to the ground, tears gathering at the tip of his nose. He clutches at his own body like it is breaking, and it is the most pathetic sight that no one ever saw.

He whispered one last time in the softest  voice possible, “Luhan”  and it reverberates of other meanings like Luhan come back, Luhan I’m sorry, Luhan I love you so much, and it is the most pathetic plea that no one ever heard.