Chapter 5 

Yuri walked to the door.

Who could it be at this time of the night?

She eyed the digital clock by the door.

11:50pm.

She opened the door and her heart sank upon seeing the familiar blond head of hair.

As she let Jessica in, she hoped fervently that it wasn’t a booty call.

“Y…Yuri, can we talk?” She asked, taking off her jacket and placing it on the hanger.

Oh, it wasn’t.

“Yeah,” Yuri motioned for Jessica to sit on the couch.

Jessica sat down, her lips once before she opened , only to close it again. Her fingers were shaking from nerves and her face was a little flushed.

“I…”

“I need to tell you something too.” Yuri cut in just before she could hear Jessica say it.

Yuri had done her own thinking and had no other reason why she thought about Yoona so often or even had the urge before to buy coffee every day for Yoona (thinking back, it seemed like it had been a lifetime ago).

“Let’s say it on three, then.” Jessica said softly, playing with her fingers.

“One…two…three.”

Jessica didn’t say anything but Yuri did.

“Let’s break up.”

Jessica swallowed. She had not been expecting that, but after all, Yuri was unpredictable.

“You…what?” Jessica didn’t know if she had heard properly.

She had come to tell Yuri that but the girl had the exact same thoughts?

“I think…I don’t know. I don’t feel right thinking about someone else while you’re kissing me, or while you’re touching me. I feel bad, Jessica, and I think you’re going to tell me the same thing too, right?” Yuri smiled a little sadly, but nevertheless her heart seemed a little lighter after letting that out.

Jessica’s answer was soft.

“Yes.”

Yuri laughed bitterly, keeping her eyes on the floor.

“I knew it. Tiffany, right?”

Jessica nodded, but in turn she teased, “Yoona, right?”

Yuri let out a shy smile and a nod.

Jessica looked down at their intertwined fingers, but she hurriedly untangled them and rested her hand on her own lap.

An awkwardness settled between them, and Jessica had no idea whether it would ever be mended—their broken relationship.

What Yuri did totally surprised Jessica, but like what Jessica said before—Yuri was always unpredictable.

Yuri reached out to hold Jessica’s hand again.

“I think if the line’s clear between friends and more, then we’re okay. We can still do this. Friends are like this, too.” Yuri smiled reassuringly.

The normal gentle caresses weren’t there, but just Yuri’s warmth from her palm was enough for Jessica.

Vice versa for Yuri.

*

Halfway home, it finally sank into Jessica that she and Yuri had really broken up.

But somehow it didn’t weigh her down that much.

She decided that there was something more than lust in a relationship—it wasn’t plainly just , , .

She realised that what she and Yuri had been missing out on for so long was really love.

They had skipped that stage of the relationship and jumped toward almost immediately.

It was a brainless relationship.

However, it also was not that Yuri treated her unkindly—Yuri was in fact the complete opposite, possessing a sweet tongue and the gentlemanly spirit. She was also forgiving, but the only drawback she had was that she was a little too competitive.

Jessica never minded, though, she really liked it when Yuri was possessive.

Jessica shook herself.

It was really no use thinking about it now.

She had to close that chapter of her life now, the one with Yuri, and start anew with Tiffany.

Every day was a new day, and tomorrow would be her beginning with Tiffany.

Her start with Taeyeon was already established the day before—and really, she really didn’t regret patching things up with Taeyeon.

She knew that beginnings were as difficult as endings.

After all, an ending means a beginning.

An ending with Yuri meant a beginning with Tiffany, and Jessica didn’t want to screw up again.

She was given a new chance, and she had to make use of it.

*

The break-up wasn’t as bad as Yuri envisioned.

Jessica seemed to think the same way as well, and that really relieved Yuri.

Just then, her phone beeped with an incoming text.

[Choi Sooyoung] Yah, Yuri! Tomorrow I’m having a party. Come over to my apartment, okay?

Yuri laughed.

Now, that was Sooyoung.

What was life without a little fun and a few shots?

[Kwon Yuri] You bet.

If Yoona was going, she’d even probably get answers from the younger.

Answers were exactly what she needed right now.

*

The day passed quickly and soon it was yesterday’s tomorrow.

The day of the big party.

Yoona was truthfully contemplating on whether she should go or not.

She wanted to have fun, of course, who didn’t? But she didn’t want to risk it and meet Yuri there.

Her resolve to stay away from the idol would just crumble and she’d just let down all her barriers again, letting Yuri re-enter her life and mess it up.

In the end, because Sooyoung couldn’t stop urging her, she went.

The first hour of the party was how a typical party would be—she ate, drank, chatted with a few distant friends.

Just then, she needed the washroom so she excused from someone called Song Qian. She was nice with her brown hair and large eyes, but if Yoona was looking for a hook-up, Song Qian wasn’t her type.

She arranged her hair and washed her hands before getting ready to get back to probably talk some more.

Just as she was about to exit the washroom, fingers curled around her wrist and jerked her back.

*

She was met, face-to-face with Yuri.

The first thing that was out of Yuri’s mouth was, “Why are you avoiding me?”

Yoona bit her lower lip.

She wasn’t supposed to meet Yuri.

Yuri didn’t look very glad.

Yoona felt guilt fill her heart.

How was she supposed to explain all the complicated feelings that she had for Yuri? She felt happy that she saw Yuri, but at the same time, not happy at all.

Her feelings were contradicting, and she didn’t know what to do.

She was momentary transfixed, and that allowed Yuri to press her up against the wall.

“Why? What did I do?” Yuri asked again.

Yoona felt uncomfortable—she knew that she could trust Yuri, yet her uneasiness for skin contact was there again. She tried to get out of Yuri’s grip but the girl was strong.

“I…let go,” she muttered breathlessly, jerking her head to the side so that she avoided eye contact with Yuri.

“Not until you give me an answer, Yoona. I need to get answers.”

“Because…” Yoona breathed, “Because I don’t want to lose you.”

It was an answer.

Yuri blinked once, twice.

She let go of Yoona and watched as Yoona weaved her way through the crowd.

I don’t want to lose you either.

 *

It was just after a performance on the music show that they frequented.

Taeyeon had decided to pay their sunbae, Heechul, a visit.

Tiffany sat on a couch in the waiting room, still in pretty low spirits from Jessica’s rejection.

Just then, a cup of coffee was set down on the table before Tiffany.

Caramel coffee, to be exact.

Tiffany looked up with curiosity and, unexpectedly, caught sight of a grinning Jessica.

“I made it. It’s probably not as good as the ones you make, but it’s a try.” Jessica moved closer to Tiffany with a smile.

Tiffany raised an eyebrow, still confused by Jessica’s sudden gesture.

Jessica’s next move most likely explained everything.

She swung one leg over Tiffany’s waist and sat down on Tiffany’s lap, sliding her arms around Tiffany and pulling her closer.

“You’re so stupid for being in a bad mood because of me,” Jessica tutted softly, pressing a kiss to Tiffany’s forehead.

Tiffany stilled.

“Soo stupid,” sighed Jessica, her hand searching out Tiffany’s to thread their fingers together.

Tiffany started, “Jess, I—”

“But I love you anyway.”

Tiffany kept quiet and just smiled against the pair of warm lips on her own, feeling Jessica do the same.

“Love you too, Jess.”

*

Yuri quickened her pace.

“She’s at the airport. She’s going to Switzerland for two weeks to film a few scenes. From 23 November to 7 December.”

Sooyoung’s words thrummed in her head as she dashed into the glass doors, looking left and right.

Terminal…Terminal two.

In less than a minute, she was near Gate five.

“Passengers to board flight SQ317 to Switzerland, please proceed to Gate seven. Thank you.”

Gate Seven. Okay.

Yuri started sprinting toward gate seven, and despite the cool air around her, sweat had broken out on her forehead, beading her hairline.

She skidded to a halt on the marble floor once she caught sight of Yoona by the gate, getting her passport ready.

“Blanky,” Yuri was panting, her hands on her knees, “I need to tell you something before you go.”

Yoona’s face definitely showed surprise, but actually kinked up in a smile.

She recognised Yuri despite the scarf, sunglasses and hat Yuri had donned.

There were a few people before Yoona and Yuri knew that she had to hurry if she was about to tell Yoona what she planned to.

Just…get yourself together. Tell her. She needs to know.

Okay. Just tell her.

Take a deep breath and—

“I like you, I really do. It’s frustrating me why you keep coming into my mind—it’s like I don’t want you to be there, but you’re always there. You’re always with me, no, not physically, like mentally—it’s…I don’t know how to explain it. But I think I like you.”

Yoona swallowed and opened , ready to say something, but before she could, they both heard,

“Excuse me, passport please.”

Yoona hurriedly closed and offered a wave before leaving Yuri there, who had bittersweet kind of smile on her face.

*

Yuri placed one foot in front of the other heavily, trying not to think about the airport incident anymore.

It’s over. You can’t do anything about it.

That was true, actually.

Yoona was gone—gone for two weeks, that was.

Yuri had no idea how she was going to stay happy without Yoona. She wouldn’t be as dramatic as to say “live without Yoona”, but to be honest “stay happy” was equally important.

After all, like someone had said before, wasn’t happiness the key to life?

Yuri dipped her head and noted the absence of leaves from the bare branches.

Winter was approaching soon, and so was Christmas. Not to mention Yuri’s birthday.

Just let it go. Your relationship will mend itself with time.

Yuri pulled an item out of her pocket and felt a surge of nostalgia hit her.

It was the four-leaf clover pendant that Yoona had given her. Yuri instantly remembered what Yoona had said to her.

“Yes, because that represents me, and if you carry it around with you, I’ll always be with you.”

A tear found its way down Yuri’s face as her fingers curled around the object.

Just then, her phone rang.

Yuri quickly used the back of her hand to wipe away her tears and got a grip on herself, glancing at the Caller ID. She could not let Sooyoung know that she had been crying.

“Kwon Yuri, you have your performance tonight in Seoul.”

“…Okay, I’m coming back now.”

“You found her?”

“Yeah,”

“Good. So my information was useful.”

Yuri forced a chuckle out of that sounded more like a wheezing horse.

Sooyoung probably thought that it was weird that Yuri was looking for Yoona at the last minute before Yoona flew off, but if anything, she didn’t voice it.

Yuri had been looking unnaturally serene.

Sooyoung didn’t really want to think about it—she knew that Yuri had never had a record that said: “I like boys.”

*

As Yoona settled down in the comfortable seats, her mind still lingered on what Yuri had told her before she had boarded the plane.

“I like you, I really do. It’s frustrating me why you keep coming into my mind—it’s like I don’t want you to be there, but you’re always there. You’re always with me, no, not physically, like mentally—it’s…I don’t know how to explain it. But I think I like you.”

Yoona sat there, rather immobilised, staring blankly at the blaring screen before her.

“Alright, please switch off all your electronic devices. Plane is ready to take off.”

Yoona slid her hand into her pocket to take out her phone, but instead her finger hit paper.

She took it out, eyeing it curiously.

What she saw made her chew on her lower lip as she reached into her other pocket to switch off her phone.

It was the ticket to Kwon Yuri’s concert in Seoul.

And the date stated was no other than 23 November.

*

Tiffany took a sip of the coffee rested on the table and her face immediately scrunched up.

“What did you put in there? Butter?” Tiffany asked, swallowing the mouthful of liquid with difficulty.

“Maybe I overdid the whip cream,” muttered Jessica as she herself placed the cup to her lips to drink.

She immediately cringed and threw the plastic cup into the nearest bin.

“My god, it tastes horrendous.”

Tiffany shrugged, “You made it.”

“Talk about being nice! I made it for you,” Jessica pouted, curling up on the sofa to rest her head on Tiffany’s lap.

Tiffany let out a sigh through her nose as she leant down and brushed her lips against Jessica’s nose.

“What made you change your mind?”

“About?” Jessica looked up at Tiffany.

“Being with me?”

Jessica smiled.

“I’ve always wanted to be with you. It was just unknown until yesterday.”

Jessica slid her arms around Tiffany’s neck.

“That sounds impossible,” Tiffany protested, reckoning that it wasn’t a proper reason.

Jessica pursed her lips.

“I’ve always loved you. I just didn’t know.”

“Then how’s it that I’ve always loved you and I’ve always known?” Tiffany protested, bottom lip jutting out.

“Cause opposites attract.”

Tiffany could say no more as Jessica pulled Tiffany down again to kiss her senseless.

*

“And the top solo idol Kwon Yuri has made it to the top 10 again! Unfortunately, this time, her position falls to 3^rd. No matter, it is still a formidable position!” The MC clapped his hands and the fans screamed.

Yuri managed a smile as she saw her fans’ excited faces.

There was no doubt a trace of disappointment in all of their expressions, though—Yuri knew that they were expecting a first again from Yuri, but Yuri had failed to give them that this time.

“I’m sorry that I was unable to get first, but I’ll try my best next week!” Yuri promised, bowing to all the people watching.

That wrapped-up the music show, and Yuri was allowed to get off the stage.

Once she was safely in the waiting room, Sooyoung handed her a bottle of water and asked, “What’s up with your performance?”

Yuri shrugged. “Maybe the fans realised that they should give others a chance.”

“Not your best though,” Sooyoung sighed.

“I’m sorry.” Yuri said the first thing that came to her mind and sank onto the sofa with resignation resonating in her voice.

“Do well on Inkigayo next week,” Sooyoung ruffled her hair and patted Yuri’s back before going off to settle more matters.

Yuri tilted the bottle to her lips and drank.

Yoona.

She closed her eyes and rested her head against the soft leather behind.

Just then, Sooyoung’s voice said beside her ear, “Hey, get up. Radio show to do.”

Yuri groaned and slid her shoes back on—she always took them off because they were sore after she wore them for a few hours straight.

“Let’s go.”

Once they were in the car, Sooyoung started to approach her wanted topic cautiously.

“I…I watched your performance on Music Core. The one you did just now.”

Yuri offered a tired nod.

“Um…you seem really tired. I mean, unnaturally. Your movements were like—rusty.” Sooyoung said softly, really trying not to offend Yuri.

When Yuri didn’t say anything, Sooyoung continued.

“Why? Is it because of…you know?” Sooyoung muttered.

“What?” Yuri looked up sharply.

“You know, her.”

“Who?”

Yuri didn’t like the way Sooyoung was approaching the topic.

She was doing so very carefully, as if Yuri would suddenly burst or something. It was like Sooyoung was waiting for an atomic bomb to explode. Not to mention that Sooyoung was speaking in an undertone like she was afraid Hyomin (the driver) would question them.

“Erm…Yoona.” Sooyoung fiddled with her fingers as she kept her eyes on Yuri’s shirt.

“What about her?”

“Are you…uh…like this, because of her?”

“Am I like what?” Yuri demanded.

“Like…tired? And…de-energized?”

“I am?”

Sooyoung gave a nod full of trepidation.

Yuri swallowed—she realised that lying to Sooyoung would just make things a whole lot more difficult. If she could trust anyone, it was Sooyoung. If she could get advice from anyone, it was either Hyomin or Sooyoung.

“Yes, it’s because of her.”

*

“Cut! Let’s wrap it up!” Yoona nodded, clapping as she eyed the piece of paper resting on the chair arm.

Scenes 5, 6, 8, 12, 13, 14, 17, 19, 21, 23, 25 and 30 to be filmed in Switzerland.

Okay, Scene 5 and 8 was done.

They had finished for the day.

“Good job everyone, thank you for working hard!” Yoona smiled, going around thanking all the cast and cameramen.

“Unnie, you’ve worked hard too.” Seohyun came over to hug Yoona and Yoona grinned.

“It was totally fun. This is like—official!”

“You’re having fun, unnie?”

Yoona nodded.

“Get some sleep, unnie, tomorrow we’re on break, right?”

“Yeah, everyone, let’s get back to the hotel!”

Yuri was definitely somewhere at the back of Yoona’s mind, and had turned into a case of “out of sight, out of mind”.

Yoona, luckily, was the kind that knew how to it up and just do it. Besides, she was doing something she enjoyed and without the troubles from Yuri, Yoona might’ve actually said that she was in heaven.

As she switched on her phone, she was surprised to see the absence of Yuri’s daily encouraging messages.

She clicked on Yuri’s contact and on the button that said ‘send a message’.

Her fingers hovered above the keyboard and she actually typed in: “I’m sorry”.

“Unnie, hurry up.”

Seohyun’s voice jolted her back to reality and she quickly deleted the message.

No, she had to stay away from Yuri, remember?

This was good.

It had to be good.

Her brain was telling her that it was a piece of good news, but her heart told her the exact opposite.

*

“You feel nothing about the breakup with that dumb blonde?” Hyoyeon asked disbelievingly as she seated herself beside Yuri.

Yuri hesitated.

“Not really nothing…just…not much. And she’s Jessica, not that dumb blonde.”

“That’s a load of bull. Speaking of bull, did you order my daily carton of Red Bull—”

Hyoyeon was cut off as a delivery form was stuffed into her hands by Sooyoung.

“40 Cartons!” Sooyoung yelled happily as she walked away.

“No…I really don’t…feel much. It’s like, all that time we were just friends with benefits.”

“Oh—isn’t that good now that you’re going to be dumping that disgusting blonde for a full-time brunette? You could’ve told me that you preferred brunettes, you know. I could’ve hooked you up good with my brother…”

“I’m not interested in guys anyway, Hyo.”

“You’re right. Forgot your differences.”

Yuri made a face as she slumped back against the sofa.

“Don’t worry, it’ll all work out. It’s either she’s for you, or she’s not for you.”

“Who?”

“Yoona, of course. If she likes you, she’ll tell you. If she doesn’t, she won’t.”

“So I just have to wait?” Yuri didn’t really trust Hyoyeon. She wanted to ask Hyomin out instead, but the girl was busy.

Guess all ‘Hyo’s weren’t the same.

She could clearly see how Hyoyeon could down twenty shots of cocktail whereas Hyomin never touched the drink.

“Yes. Wait.”

“How can I wait? It’s only been four days and I’m already having Yoona withdrawal symptoms.”

“You’re scary.”

“…I miss her.”

“Well I miss my terrier too.”

“Missing a dog is different, Hyo.”

*

“Yoona, honey, where’ve you been?”

Yoona blanched. Her aunt.

“I’m overseas directing a movie. What’s wrong?”

Yoona bit her tongue, resisting the urge to say ‘I don’t think you’d care, though’.

“Oh, of course you are, dear. I called to ask you how the blind date with Siwon…”

“It was bad. I’m sorry, but I can’t get engaged to him.”

“Why? Wasn’t he the dream guy?”

“Not really. I don’t love him.”

“I feared that, honey. Well, it’s fine, though. Siwon’s parents got into a bad car accident.”

Oh. Now Yoona felt bad.

“It was something really serious, hon. I’m adopting him.”

Yoona tried to stifle her cough, but somehow it didn’t help.

“No—he’s what—23? And you’re adopting him?”

“Yes, but just for the ministry to see. Paperwork. That’s the only way I can allegedly hand down the company to him. He’ll help run Im Company after I’m gone, so you don’t have to. You’ll still have to keep a good image, of course, but really, if you find the love of your life, you need not worry about the gender. Just…”

Her aunt stopped, but continued.

“Just…don’t go overboard. And it’s okay.”

*

“The three lovely ladies of 3Vo greet us again on Inkigayo! And this time, they’ve climbed right up to the top! Wow! This is new! It’s their first triple crown! Haven’t they always only been 4^th or 5^th? Let’s invite the leader Taeyeon to tell us about their new achievement!”

Tiffany and Jessica hugged as they realised that they had finally won. Their winning streak had always been broken one way or another by Yuri’s performance.

Taeyeon held the microphone firmly in her hand as she said,

“To all our lovely fans, our Vocalists! Thank you for cheering so hard and voting for us! We’re really thankful for this award since it’s our first time winning Triple Crown! You guys might be asking for the reason, right?”

Taeyeon stopped enough for the fans to chant, “Yes!”

There was a smile on Taeyeon’s face as she said into the mic, “The secret’s teamwork.”

It was true, in a sense.

As the girls stepped off the stage, they could only think about Taeyeon and Jessica’s re-found friendship and Tiffany and Taeyeon’s mending of their originally awkward relationship after their breakup.

They had failed to get Triple Crowns before because Taeyeon and Jessica had lacked teamwork before.

They were supposed to catch each other’s notes and continue, but somehow, without teamwork, Tiffany was forced to catch for either Taeyeon or Jessica, and believe me, Tiffany wasn’t that great of a vocalist as Taeyeon and Jessica were.

She could hold the low notes, but not so much the high and powerful ones.  

Jessica smiled, glad that she was finally making use of her new beginnings with both Taeyeon and Tiffany.

*

“Where’re you going, unnie?”

“Back to Korea. It’s just one day, though, so don’t worry, I’ll be back by tomorrow to film.”

“Why, unnie?”

It was difficult to throw off a curious and stubborn Seohyun, but right at that point, nothing could stop Yoona.

“Tell Yuri something.”

Yoona had done her thinking. She had to tell Yuri what she needed to get off her chest—right now. She had to let Yuri know.

After all, her aunt had allowed her to, right?

“…What, unnie?”

“I’ve told manager oppa. Bye, Seo.”

“Unnie?”

*

 “Happy birthday, Yuri-ah!” Sooyoung yelled, her loud voice ringing throughout the dorm.

“We gonna party, and we ain’t gon stop till next morningggg…”

The music blasted through the apartment and Hyoyeon launched a wrapped present in front of Yuri.

“Open it! It’s your pressie! You’re 21!”

Yuri was actually pretty scared of what Hyoyeon had gotten for her. Hyoyeon had just broken her all-time record and downed eight bottles of soju. Yuri was rather worried for her.

“What’s this?” Yuri asked suspiciously, holding up the pink item.

“What do you think?”

Sooyoung burst into laughter upon seeing Hyoyeon’s present.

“Hyo, that’s really sick, I don’t think she’s gonna use it.” Sooyoung gasped while laughing as she clutched at her stomach.

“A pleasure tool, my innocent girl.” Hyoyeon laughed, slapping Yuri on the back as a smirk appeared on her face.

A blush rode up Yuri’s cheeks as she quickly stuffed the back into the wrapping.

“Yah! I…”

“It’s all for fun! You know, I never disappoint. My birthday gifts are the best!” Hyoyeon protested as Yuri attempted to shove her off the building.

“Seriously!” Yuri yelled, but just as she was about to throw another piece of cake at Hyoyeon, the doorbell rang.

Yuri got to the door and opened it.

“If I’m not interrupting anything…”

The timid girl standing by the door totally shocked Yuri.

“Yoona?”

*

“Yeah…I...wanted to tell you something. Is it okay if you…came out for a moment? Or…”

“If that’s the cops, tell them to screw off!” Hyoyeon’s loud voice came from inside the room, followed by Sooyoung’s cackles.

Yuri immediately turned sober as she told Yoona, “Wait here.”

She walked back into the house and gave both Sooyoung and Hyoyeon forehead knuckles.

“I’m going out, okay, so just…make sure my house is in one piece later when you leave.”

Sooyoung and Hyoyeon didn’t even complain as they gave nods and watched as Yuri left the house.

If anything, they wanted Yuri and Yoona to resolve their problems quickly.

*