The first few weeks they were getting used to things. Jongin and Kyungsoo would wake up together every morning to the sound of an alarm clock. Kyungsoo would irritably reach out and try to slam his fist against the sound, but Jongin would always have to roll over and turn it off himself. He would then place a gentle kiss to his love’s cheek before rolling out of the bed and getting dressed. The older would simply sit up and wait, knowing that he might stumble or fall if he tried to get out of bed himself like he had the first few days home. Jongin would come over and help him into his clothes for the day, but eventually Kyungsoo got pretty good at doing it himself.

They would wander out to the kitchen, usually hand in hand, and Kyungsoo would have his other hand out in front of him to ensure he didn’t run into any obstacles on the way. Once he was seated, the younger would prepare breakfast. It was always the blind one’s choice.

Their days were almost peaceful. They would go for walks sometimes, but Kyungsoo always held Jongin closer when they went out and away from the familiarity of his home. Other days they would just stay in the house, snuggling on the couch, listening to the radio, the news, anything to stimulate the other senses. Dr.Byun encouraged them both to relive old memories to keep Kyungsoo’s mental visualization intact. Sometimes they would spend hours laughing or crying or just quietly reminiscing about the past and the things they could remember so clearly. Even Jongin thought it helped.

Often, Jongdae and Chanyeol came over. Sometimes Baekyhun would even tag along, but he was usually busy at the hospital, Chanyeol would explain. It was refreshing for Kyungsoo to hear some familiar voices every once in a while. They would tell Jongin funny stories about stuff they did with Kyungsoo and they would always comment on how much more smiley he was now that Jongin was back, but the younger knew that wasn’t as true as they believed it was.

One day, when Jongdae and Chanyeol were over, Kyungsoo felt really tired and politely asked if he could go to bed early. He felt bad,  leaving them like that, but he really could barely sit up. They didn’t argue and Jongin took him to bed without a fuss. When he came back out, he found the two of them still sitting on the couch.

“Hey, can we talk?” Chanyeol asked. Jongdae stared.

“Yeah, sure.” Jongin replied, sitting across from them on a chair.

“I know you guys are going through a hard time.”Chanyeol began.

“A really hard time.” Jongdae chimed in.

“Yeah. But… Shorty was our lighting director. And we’ve gone weeks without a decent one. He and I have been trading off but with me in charge of the stage and him in charge of sound, it’s just way too much work.” Chanyeol scratched the back of his head, pausing. He really didn’t want to ask.

Jongdae beat him to it. “Look… we were just wondering if maybe you could take a job as our lighting director. We guess you guys need the money since neither of you have an income, and we will be completely understanding if you ever need to rush home for him.” He didn’t even need to say Kyungsoo’s name.

Jongin looked down at the floor. His mind went to all the bills that they had been getting in the mail. Of course, the older hadn’t seen them but he really didn’t know what to do about them. He needed to get a job to support his love and keep him safe. He wouldn’t get a better deal than this.

Chanyeol leaned forward a bit. “Can you do it?”

Jongin hesitated, but reluctantly nodded.

“Thanks, man. We really appreciate it.” The stage director smiled his wide smile and shook Jongin’s hand before patting Jongdae on the back and standing up. “Start next week, alright? We’ll text you a schedule. Everything will be fine. We’ve got your back.”

“How has working at the theatre been?” Kyungsoo asked, laying his head on Jongin’s chest as they rested on the couch. The taller man shrugged.

“It’s been okay. I don’t really have much to do since they are content with the lighting most of the time. I usually just dance on the stage for fun and people watch. It’s nice to get some practice in.” He didn’t like to talk about dancing too much in front of his love. He was afraid it would upset him since he couldn’t see.

“That’s nice. Do people like your dancing?”

Jongin nodded. “Yeah, they seem to like it. It was weird though. Today, there was some random guy just sitting in the back of the theatre watching me. I couldn’t recognize him in the dark and, afterwards, when I went looking for him, he was nowhere to be found.”
 

“Hm. Creepy.”

“Yeah, but I found out from Chanyeol later on that it was some famous dance guy. I had never heard of him. Can’t even remember the name now. I guess he hated it so much he just had to leave.” Jongin yawned. He didn’t care much.

“I doubt that.” Kyungsoo replied, yawning as well. “I bet he loved it.”

“Hahaha, Chanyeol, nah man. Stop! You’re crazy.” Jongin laughed from outside of the house. “Go man, go! Get home. Baekhyun’s probably going crazy right now.” He laughed some more, stumbling a bit to the door as Chanyeol waved and drove away, swerving a bit as he did so.

Jongin fumbled with the keys and dropped them a few times, cursing to himself. He really couldn’t see straight. It was the third night in the last three weeks that he had gone out partying with Jongdae and Chanyeol after work. It had become their thing on Friday nights. He was glad to have made such good friends, but tonight he had drank a little bit more than he should have.

When he finally got through the door he almost tripped in the dark over the mat. He groaned. “Damn lights.” After slipping off his shoes, he felt around the wall, finding the switches and turning all of them on at once.

“Ow!” Kyungsoo yelped, covering his eyes. He was still sensitive to sudden changes in light with his condition. “Try not to do that.” He called out from the living room. “How late is it? Is it really that dark?” he asked, not being able to see the time himself.

Jongin eyed the clock. It was a little after 2 in the morning. He turned to face Kyungsoo and said “It’s only 11:30.” He took a few drowsy steps in his direction. He stumbled a bit but not loud enough for the other to notice.

The older smiled and chuckled. “Ah, so you decided not to stay out too late this time. Good. You’re no fun when you wake up with a hangover the next morning.” 

Jongin stared at the other’s unknowing expression for a moment. Suddenly, he felt angry. He was angry that Kyungsoo didn’t know what time it was. He was angry that Kyungsoo couldn’t tell he was drunk off his . He was angry that Kyungsoo would never look at him when they spoke.

After some silence, the blind one asked “Something wrong?”

“Look at me.” He demanded, harshly.

The older made a confused face, standing. “Jongin… you know I can’t—“

“I said look at me, dammit.” He yelled this time.

Kyungsoo shook his head. “I can’t…”

Jongin spat. “What good are you if you can’t even ing look at me?”

Kyungsoo clenched a fist a bit, annoyed. “Don’t talk to me like that! I can’t look at you, you know that! How drunk are you? What’s the matter with your head?!”

Jongin snapped. “There’s nothing ing wrong with my head! You’re the one with the ed up head!”

The other squeezed his fists harder. “Shut up! Just shut up!”

“You’re broken! You’re useless! You’re not the man I fell in love with!” Jongin was close now, towering over the older man. He clenched his own fists and in a daze he pulled back and brought his fist forward with full force.

He stopped dangerously close to his love’s face.

Then he crumbled.

Kyungsoo hadn’t flinched.

Jongin fell on the ground to his knees. He sobbed, covering his face with his hands. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” He muttered over and over again, shaking and feeling sick to his stomach. He was a mess. All the pent up stress and aggression. It was all pouring out of him.

“I just wish you could watch me. One time. One last time so I could be sure you loved me. So I could be sure you adored me with your whole heart.” He confessed, feeling gentle fingers running through his hair. Kyungsoo was too forgiving.

Jongin went to sleep soon after that and forgot everything by the next morning. Kyungsoo decided not to bring it up, but it was obvious that Jongin was suspicious of the way the other was acting. The older didn’t seem to smile as much. He didn’t seem as excited as usual to go for walks, listen to the radio, or even relive old memories.

“I love you.” Jongin said that so many times the upcoming days. Kyungsoo wouldn’t reply. He would try his hardest to look at the other but he just couldn’t do it.  After giving up, he would sigh and nod.

“Mm. I love you too.” He didn’t think he had to say it because he knew Jongin didn’t really believe it.

“Baekhyun… you just can’t tell Jongin about this, okay?” Kyungsoo whispered into the phone.

“Of course.” Baekhyun replied. “It is your decision whether or not you want to tell him.”

Kyungsoo heard the sound of the door opening and quickly stuttered a goodbye before hanging up the phone. “Jongin?” He called out.

“I have great news!” The younger replied, running through the house and suddenly taking his love into his arms. “You’ll never believe what happened today!” He was full of excitement. “Remember that guy I told you about? The one that was watching me?”

Kyungsoo nodded.

“It turns out he is Yixing! One of the most famous dance instructors of all time! I’ve idolized him since I was a child. He said he loved my dancing and he wants me to perform at the show he is having put on in a month as the finale!” He squeezed Kyungsoo even tighter. “It’s like a dream come true!”

He was smiling on the outside, congratulating the younger man, but Kyungsoo was full of worry. It was all or nothing. Now or never. After the way Jongin just spoke, Kyungsoo knew he didn’t have any other choice.

He had to watch him dance.

Author's Note: Sorry for the uncharacteristically late update. I've just been swamped with school and stuff so I didn't get to write it all out. There is a bit of foreshadowing in this chapter. I hope some of you understand where this is going. Thank for you being patient and I promise I will update again quicker than last time. Lots of Love <3