EPISODE TWO: Shattered Dreams

5:30 PM, Tuesday, November 25, 2013

Jiyeon nervously held on tightly to her bag.

Tick tock. Tick tock.

Even the stupid clock in the office was teasing her. She sighed as she waited for the doctor to come back into his office with the results. It was taking him such a long time. The door finally opened and the old doctor came in and sat at his desk across from her.

“Sorry, it took a long time, Ms. Jiyeon.”

--

Same time, Same day

Luna happily sipped her fruit smoothie while listening to the SHINee album through her headphones and doing her homework. She was sitting in the café, waiting for IU to finish her part time job so they can eat dinner together. Luna just hummed as she scribbled random thoughts onto her journal.

“Hey, Sunyoung,” IU said as she passed by Luna’s table, “My shift is almost over. Sorry for making you wait so much.”

Luna shook her head, “No, no. It’s fine. Besides, I got a free drink.” She lifted up her drink and smiled. IU smiled back as she left to serve other tables. Luna looked out the window and let out a sigh. Honestly, she hadn’t talked to Onew oppa since forever. Yeah, she was somewhat expecting this. He did debut after all, and now he can never go out in public without disguise. The amount of popularity SHINee had within their first month debut was insane. While Luna was extremely happy with their success and popularity, she couldn’t help but feel a bit sad at the distance created between her and Onew. Well, not like there was a close distance to begin with. But, hey, Onew did always call her and buy her food and stuff. Pre-debut season anyway. That had to mean something, right?

Luna shook her head and turned back to write in her journal when something caught her eye. Was that Onew on the news?

--

2 Weeks ago, Monday, November 10, 2013

Luna let out the breath she had been holding the whole time as she walked out of the audition room. That was almost as nerve-wrecking as when she auditioned to get into Kirin. Luna had gone over the lines in her head and practiced her facial expressions over and over before she got called in.

Luna shakily made her way to a seat before allowing herself to embarrassingly let her legs give in. She took a big gulp of water before trying to remember her audition. But honestly, she was blank. Luna couldn’t really remember anything. Well, at least no one knew she was here. Luna didn’t have the guts to tell anyone about this audition. That way she wouldn’t have to think about the shame she might receive if this audition doesn’t go the way she planned it. Okay, yes, Luna has a little bit of self-confidence issue, if you didn’t figure that out already. But, whatever. This was something Luna always wanted to try. Even though her parents want her to go into the idol world, Luna secretly always liked the Broadway stage more.

Luna finally regained some sort of her senses and got up to leave.

Two weeks. And then she would find out the results. Sigh, it was gonna be a long two weeks.

--

“Cheers!”

The group of Kirin students lifted up their glass of juice (sadly, they need to wait one more year till they can drink the goods) and drank.

“I can’t believe you’re an idol, man!” Tao exclaimed, patting his friend. Taemin laughed a bit. “Everything seems so surreal.”

Yes, the busy Taemin of the rookie group SHINee was at this event. In fact, it was an event for him. Kyungsoo planned a hangout for Taemin with some of his old Kirin friends to support him. It was near impossible, finding a time for Taemin to come out, but Kyungsoo always did the impossible.

He invited most of their 93 line, and some of Taemin’s close dongsengs like Kai and his girlfriend Soojung. Oh, and Sehun. Cuz, you know, he’s Kyungsoo’s brother. It was more of a small get to together to celebrate their successful friend, if anything.

“Taemin-ah, what’s it like being on that stage?” Jiyeon asked with big, hopeful eyes.

“Mmm,” he replied, “It’s unreal. That feeling. It’s so powerful and overwhelming. The whole crowd is staring at you and cheering for you. It’s a pretty awesome feeling.”

“Wow!” Eunji chimed in, “I would do anything to stand on that stage.”

“You will get there!” Taemin said, “you all will!”

Luna abruptly stood up and raised her chicken drumstick.

“Indeed, we will! I believe it! We will all be on that stage! Who’s with me?”

Eunji stood up and raised her chicken, “ay, ay, captain!”

The group of friends just laughed and ignored the overdramatic girls.

“Please sit down and stop embarrassing yourselves.” Kyungsoo said as he drank his juice.

“The 93 sunbaes are pretty funny” Kai said, nudging Taemin.

After eating, the group of friends played some dance central (which ended up with an epic dance battle between Kai and Taemin) and karaoke (in which IU kept ruining the mood with sad, sappy songs and Luna was a mic hog).

Luna hummed as she looked up another song to sing. Tao was currently in the middle of belting out H.O.T. with Taemin and Kai as backup dancers. As Luna flipped through the book, she noticed Jiyeon coughing next to her.

“Jiyeon, are you okay?” she asked. Luna waited a minute before Jiyeon’s coughing fit left and Jiyeon replied, “I’m fine. My throat’s just been hurting for a little bit the past couple weeks. It’ll be fine.”

Luna frowned, “Hey, a vocalists most important tool is the voice, so you need to take care of it” Luna grabbed the mic from Jieyon’s hand “No more singing today for you. And promise me you’ll go check with the doctors.”

Jiyeon pouted, “Okay, I’ll go to the doctor. But can I sing just one more song? I haven’t sang big bang oppas in a while~”

Luna laughed as she handed the mic back, “Okay.”

--

Thursday, November 14, 2013

“Oh my gosh, you’re home for once.” Luna said to Chanyeol as she walked in with Eunji to her house. Said brother was sitting at the large kitchen table with Chen and Baekhyun.

“Oh, and Chen and Baekhyun, you guys are here too? Since when did this become a rare sight?”

“Hello to you too, dear sister.” Chanyeol said, “Hi Eunji.”

“Hello Chanyeol oppa~” Eunji replied cheerfully, “And Chen. And friend.”

Baekhyun looked up and looked at Eunji. “By friend, you don’t mean me, do you?”

“Yes, friend is you.” Eunji said flatly before sitting on the other side of the table.

Luna went into the kitchen and pulled out pots and pans, making some loud noises.

“Sunyoung, what are you doing in there?” Chen asked, looking up from his paper.

“Making food!” Luna yelled from the kitchen. Chanyeol laughed.

“What, baby sister? You? Make food? HAHAHA.”

Luna came out into the dining hall for a second to send dagger glares at her brother before returning into the kitchen.

“Hey, Sunyoung. While you’re at it, can I get some food, too? This oppa has been working so hard. I’m hungry~” Baekhyun said.

“Then you should go buy your own food, friend.” Eunji said with an obviously ingenuine smile.

“Same goes to you, friend.” Baekhyun retorted.

“Ey, stop fighting.” Chen said, waving his arms around. “Oh, and Sunyoung, I would like to place an order as well, if you don’t mind.”

“No problem~” Luna shouted from the kitchen.  Chanyeol looked at them with big eyes. “You guys trust her?”

They shrugged. “More than I trust you.” Chen said. Baekhyun nodded, “I’m tired of eating your ramen.”

Baekhyun then suddenly froze. “I hope you’re not making ramen, Sunyoung.”

There was a loud crashing and popping noise. “Don’t worry! It’s not!”

“Is everything okay in there?” Chen asked loudly. “Shouldn’t you go check on her?” Chen asked Eunji, who was diligently doing her homework.

“Nope.” She said without looking up, “Sunyoung always makes a lot of unnecessary noise while cooking.”

“Mmm, okay.” Chen said unsurely as more noise came from the kitchen. The four people at the table studied diligently as loud noises continued to come from the kitchen like a very unpleasant symphony.

“HEY. CLEAR THE TABLE. I’M DONE!” Luna shouted. They quickly obeyed and cleaned while Chanyeol grabbed the utensils. Luna emerged from the kitchen with a huge wok-sized pan filled with spicy rice cakes. The boys just stared at the insane amount of food the girl made while Eunji just said thanks and started eating.

“Sunyoung-ah…” Chen said. “Yeah?” Luna asked as she sat down to eat.

“Isn’t this a little too much?” Bakehyun finished. The boys just stared at Eunji and Luna who ate the food.

“I don’t think so.” Luna said and continued eating.

“Your best batch so far!” Eunji said enthusiastically. “Oppas and friend. Please, try it!”

Chen hesitantly reached over and placed one in his mouth. Luna looked at him with big and expectant eyes. “How is it?” she asked. Chen nodded, “Oh wow, it actually tastes pretty good. This is impressive.”

Luna smiled and happily ate more. Baekhyun and Chanyeol became less suspicious and ate too.

And there were no left overs.

--

Saturday, November 16, 2013.

“Morning, Kyungsoo.” Luna said as she barged into his room. A just-woke-up-and-half- Kyungsoo stirred from his bed and looked up before fully understanding the situation.

“YAH!” he yelled while quickly sitting up on the bed while covering himself with his blanket. Luna ignored the frazzled Kyungsoo and started searching Kyungsoo’s desks and drawers. “Why are you just barging in here?!?” Kyungsoo asked, “Don’t you think this is too much? How’d you even get in? Don’t you-”

“Where’s the rabbit foot?” She asked, turning away from his desk and looking at Kyungsoo.

“Wait, what? Can you please answer my-”

“I’m looking for the rabbit foot. NO, I don’t think it’s too much. Your mom opened the door for me. Anything else you would like to know before you answer my question?”

Kyungsoo frowned, “Must you always-”

“rabbit foot.”

“-cut me off.” He finished to himself. Kyungsoo shook his head, “I thought you had it.”

Luna shook her head before turning back to check the drawers again, “I don’t. I looked everywhere for it, but it’s no where to be found.”

“I’ll help you looked for it.” Kyungsoo said. The reaction was immediate. Luna looked at him with such a joyful smile, “really, Kyungsoo?”

He nodded. “Now just get the hell out of my room!”

Luna cheekily smiled as she turned around as Kyungsoo scrambled to put some clothes on.

“I mean, honestly, it’s not like there’s something I haven’t seen before.” Luna said, back still turned to Kyungsoo.

“We were young children back then” Kyungsoo said, fully clothed and next to Luna. Luna shrugged as Kyungsoo grabbed a box from underneath the desk to find the nasty little foot.

“Is it there?” Luna asked Kyungsoo. He crawled back from under the desk and handed her the rabbit foot.

“Here.”

Luna beamed. “Yay! Thank you Kyungsoo, my dear friend!”

She patted him on the back. Kyungsoo just rolled his eyes. “Why do you need it anyway?”

Luna blinked and looked away. “Um… it’s a secret?”

Kyungsoo shook his head as he plopped on top of his bed and Luna sat on his chair. “Is it for your audition?”

Luna perked up. “What?” she squeaked.

“Honestly,” Kyungsoo said, “Did you think I wouldn’t know. Your application was just sitting on your desk for crying out loud.”

Luna blushed and looked down. “I… I didn’t want anyone to know.”

Kyungsoo smiled and patted her on the back. “I’m sure you did fine. Although I am a bit sad that you didn’t tell me. I was half waiting for you to tell me first.”

“Sorry” Luna said, “But in my defense… I didn’t tell anyone. Not even Chanyeol.”

“Well, when do your results come out?” he asked.

“In a week” Luna said with a huge gulp.

“Let me know how it goes, yeah?”

Luna nodded. “In the mean while, I’m gonna just hold on to mr. rabbit’s foot.”

--

Back to 5:30 PM, Tuesday, November 25, 2013

Luna happily sipped her fruit smoothie and scribbled her thoughts into her journal. As she finished up her sentence, Luna looked up and the television screen caught her eyes.

Luna blinked her eyes for a couple seconds before fully registering what she saw on tv. All the chatter around her deafened, the music playing in her ears disappeared, and all Luna could see was the news. Onew Oppa was allegedly dating the Girl’s Generation member Jessica.

It still didn’t fully register in Luna’s head. Onew Oppa. Jinki Oppa. Her oppa, her knight in shining armor… was dating. Luna didn’t know how to respond. This couldn’t be true, right? It was only a scandal… they were only caught walking together around the city at night. Friends can take strolls together. Luna felt tears welling up in her eyes.

IU’s face popped up in her vision and started moving, but Luna couldn’t hear anything. In a daze, she just mumbled a “sorry” to IU and then left the café.

--

Same place, same time

“I’m sorry, what?” Jiyeon asked.

“You have nodules in your thyroid. We don’t know how large it is, as this scan only shows it from a frontal view. But you need to have surgery as soon as possible.” The doctor said. Jiyeon looked at the doctor in shock.

“We have scheduled you to a surgery procedure in three days. It won’t be too difficult, but it depends on how big these lumps became.”

Jiyeon took a deep breath before asking the question that has been popping up in her head. “I can still sing, right, doctor?”

The doctor looked at her with a sad smile, “The chances are very very low. This scan shows that the nodules are touching your vocal chords. The possibility of it not being affected is almost close to none.”

Jiyeon just nodded as she felt her tears finally drop.

“But, Doctor,” Jiyeon said, “I’m training right now. I’m training to become a singer. My dream is to become a singer, standing on the big stage. I’ve been… I-I’ve been working so hard my… my whole life. I… I don’t. I just don’t know what to say.”

The doctor kept talking but Jiyeon couldn’t really hear anything. She just got up and slowly walked out of the consulting room. Her phone was ringing and buzzing but Jiyeon couldn’t hear it. She just walked out of the hospital was tears running down her face.

--

7:00 PM, Tuesday, November 25, 2013

Luna sighed. Onew oppa was ignoring her calls and texts. Well obviously the company probably got mad over their whole scandal and everything. So Luna called Jonghyun, who was of close to no help. Except she did hear someone’s voice that vaguely resembled onew’s saying something about the park. So Luna sat on a bench at the park Onew always goes to. In the freezing cold. Luna tried to keep herself warm and looked around for Onew.

Honestly, Luna didn’t even know what she was here for. She just… wanted to know. She wanted to know that it was real. Or that it wasn’t. Luna blew on her hands to keep herself warm.

From the distance, Luna finally saw a figure approaching. Luna squinted her eyes and confirmed that the figure from far away was indeed Onew oppa. She smiled in excitement and got up to go towards him, when she saw another figure.

It was a girl.

It was Jessica.

Luna’s smile fell and she just stood from afar, watching the two hug and talk. Luna fell back onto the bench and just sat there.

So it really was true. Onew Oppa was dating Jessica unni. They were dating. Luna laughed. She laughed out loud. She was such an idiot. Tears started spilling as she laughed. To think that Luna ever thought she had a chance. To think that she ever though that Onew oppa just might like her back. To think that he might have feelings for her. To think that they would end up together. It all seemed ludacris now.

She was such a fool.

Her phone suddenly rang, breaking her out of her thoughts. She looked and saw it was the musical agency. Quickly wiping away her tears, Luna cleared her voice before picking up the call.

“Hello” Luna answered, voice a little shakey.

“Hi, is this Park Sunyoung?”

“Yes, this is her.” Luna replied.

“Hi, we are calling from the Phantom of the Opera production. We are sorry to inform you that you have not been selected on cast this year. We thank you for auditioning and we hope to see …” Luna dropped her phone onto the ground.

She started laughing again. But this time, she just couldn’t stop. The laughing or the tears.

She really was such a fool.

--

Jiyeon quietly waited for Myungsoo at the coffee shop. She just stared at the hot chocolate mug that was before her.

“Sorry I’m a little late,” Myungsoo said as he slid onto the seat across from her. He looked at his girlfriend who was less cheerful than usual.

“Jiyeon-ah, are you okay?” he asked.

“Oppa.” Jieyon said, “I went to the doctor today. And they said that I can’t sing anymore. Singing is all I knew growing up. I don’t know what to do anymore. What am I supposed to do, oppa?”

Jiyeon looked at Myungsoo with pleading eyes. Myungsoo took in the information and gently placed his hand on top of hers.

“At least it’s not deadly. At least, you’ll live. That in itself is a blessing, isn’t it?” Myungsoo said with a smile, “I know that anything I say won’t be much to you right now. But, it will be okay. It will get better. Dreams are something that we build up. Sometimes they are shattered. Other times, they are maybe reached. But life isn’t only about the actual end, but the journey of getting there. It’s gonna be hard at first, but you’ll get back up, Jiyeon. You’ll find something else you love. You’ll find another dream to build up. And I promise I will be there with you. Every step of the way.”

Jiyeon sobbed as she heard Myungsoo’s words. “You promise?”

Myungsoo went over to Jiyeon’s side as he gave a hug and allowed her to cry over his chest. “I promise.”

--

Luna didn’t know how long she sat there on that bench, shivering in the cold. Well, she didn’t really feel it that much anymore. Her phone was ringing like crazy but Luna didn’t have the energy or the cognitive ability to pick it up. She just sat dazed for the longest time. What a day. The love of her life who was her first love never thought of her as nothing more than a sister and was actually dating like only one of the most prettiest girls in the Korean pop industry and she got rejected from the musical she was looking forward to. So yeah, life kind of at the moment for Luna.

“Yah.” A gruff voice said. Luna looked up and saw Kyungsoo, huffing and puffing in front of her. She looked up at him confused, “How did you-”

“You babo!” Kyungsoo yelled, “Do you know how many times I called you? Jieun was super worried, too. Not to mention your parents. Do you know what time it is? You really should be-”

“Kyungsoo-yah” Luna weakly said, cutting him off, “I’m really sorry, but I’m not in the mood to be scolded. I’ll go back, so can I be alone for a little bit.”

Kyungsoo sighed before sitting next to her.

“I didn’t mean to yell” Kyungsoo said, “I was just a little worried.”

Luna just nodded as the two sat in silence.

“It could be just a scandal, Sunyoung.” Kyungsoo said. Luna smiled as she shook her head, “Ani. I saw it with my own two eyes.”

“Are you okay?” Kyungsoo asked, concerned. Luna sighed, “I don’t know. I have to be. I will be. It just… kind of stings.”

“Do you want me to beat him up for you?” Kyungsoo asked, “Cuz I can, ya know. I’ve been working out a bit, so I can take him down.”

Luna chuckled a little bit.

“Hey, you just laughed!” Kyungsoo said excitedly.

“I did not.” Luna said, composing herself. And then she started laughing out loud. Kyungsoo laughed along with her.

“Oh, man. The thought of you beating anybody up!” Luna said, as her laughs started toning down. Kyungsoo frowned, “What do you mean? I’m offended.”

Luna smiled as she looked at the ground and picked up her phone.

“I got rejected, too, by the way.” Luna said. Kyungsoo looked at her quizzically, “You got rejected?”

Luna nodded, “from the musical.”

Kyungsoo pulled Luna’s arm towards him and laid her head on his shoulder. He patted her head. “It’s okay. They don’t know what a great singer they’re missing out on.”

Luna blinked before smiling. She sat back up and gave Kyungsoo a hug.

“Thanks, Kyungsoo. I… really, thanks. You’re a really great friend.”

Kyungsoo just smiled and stood up, brushing off his pants. “I am pretty awesome, if I don’t say so myself.”

Luna laughed as she got up, too. She only barely realized how cold it was.

“I’ll race ya home. Loser buys dinner tomorrow,” Kyungsoo said as he sped off in the direction.

“Hey, not fair, you started before me!” Luna shouted before following after him.

And that’s how the dream of my first love was shattered, Luna thought, that cold winter night of November. My first love was short and sweet, but it withered away at the crisp coldness of winter. But the best thing about winter is that spring always follows. And spring always promises warmth. That winter, dreams were shattered and hearts were broken, but there’s always new paths waiting to be discovered.

--

A/N: hey guys. thanks for being so patient with the update! This was a bit of a heartbreaking chapter, but hope ya'll enjoyed it. I'm sure everyone understands that bittersweet feeling of first love. Haha, anyway leave a comment and opinion or whatnot. What you like what you don't like. Also, someone asked if f(x) was gonna be in here. I'm trying to keep it to their age groups, so maybe they will have appearances here and there, but they probably won't be super involved. Cameos will continue here and there as well. And hope you liked Jiyeon's side story. Alrighty, till next time, peace.