Tears of the Moon

Chapter 03

Three taps in the wall. It was a signal. 

A signal rarely used in her chamber. A signal she had been waiting and preparing for ever since the news she heard from Jiyoung. She straightened herself from where she sat.

She prepared herself. She composed herself.

'I am Queen Gyuri', she thought.

'I will not break'. She chanted within herself

'They can never break me.' She solidified her resolve.

A couple of minutes off wait before one of her attendants announced, "Your Majesty, His majesty is here for you."

'He will never break me.', she ruefully smiled, knowing what a huge lie it was. She was already broken. Broken into a thousand pieces because of him. Broken beyond repair. Broken the way he wanted her to be. 

'But he will not SEE me broken.’ She amended

'Never'

"Let His Majesty come in", she answered.

She stood up as the door opened. 

She gave him a smile. A smiled that she had perfected a smile to hide her true self and heart.

She then welcomed him, "It's an honor to have you visit my chambers, Your Majesty"

He stood in her room. He stared at her.

She gave him a more radiant smile, 'You can never break me again, your majesty..'

She tilted her head and motioned for him to take his seat. "Please your majesty, take your seat"

'I may love you but never again will I be played', her facade was perfect.

She nodded for Jiyoung to bring in the refreshment, and then she positioned herself opposite him.

"My Queen", He acknowledged her with his low and manly voice. 

She looked at his face and when he caught her eyes, he smiled. He smiled at her. A smile she rarely sees. The smile always denied to her.

It hit her. His smile hit her. 

He has never smiled at her. It was common knowledge among their attendants that he hated her. it was a common occurrence wherein his smiles were designated for everyone but her.

"Yes, your majesty?” She smiled more, turning in full force her facade. 'Bastard'

He laughed as he sat down, "You, My Queen, are full of surprises, as always."

Uncharacteristic of him

He continued to laugh. His laughter resonating in her chamber. Laughter that relieved the tension that their attendants was obviously feeling. Their attendants looked at each other in confusion but relaxed seeing that the King was laughing while the queen was smiling.

She sat down and stared at him, "Pardon your majesty? I don't know what you mean..", she was confused.

"Oh, My Queen, you just don't know how truly amusing you are..", he answered cryptically with a wily smile on his lips.

"Pardon?", She asked still with the smile still plastered in her smile. He will never break that smile from her lips. 

'He will never break me, again. Never again!'

'Whatever it is.'

He then turned to his most trusted guard and spoke, "I want to be alone with my Queen"

She watched as all their attendants scrambled out. She saw a couple of them, smiling suspiciously. Then they were alone, the chamber door closed against everyone else. 

She directed her eyes back to the king and her husband who was sitting in front of her. He continued to smile.

She immediately erased the confused expression in her face and plastered her smile.

He smiled, mirroring her smile.

She pushed her facial muscle to make a more radian and happy expression, 'Whatever game you are doing. I will not break apart again.'

'I am stronger now', she chanted as she took deep breath and placed her perfect smile in front of him.

He laughed again. She wanted to throw her fist into his face. But did opposite from what she was feeling, she laughed with him instead.

Seeing her laughed, he laughed some more. He was banging the table between them, with his right hand as his left hand was tucked in his stomach from his convulsing laughter.

The room was filled with their laughter mixing together, his loud and out of control and hers demure as what a Queen should do.

But even with the laughter in the air, the tension was palpable with just two of them inside.

"Oh, my queen.." He called to her between his laughter.

"Yes, Your majesty.." She laughed too. 'Two can play this game'

She watched as his laughter slowly died down and he was sat more regally. When his laughter was all gone, he smiled at her. She smiled back.

"My Queen, do you hate me?" The King suddenly asked with a smile of his lips. His voice was warm but his were serious.

She continued to smile and her facade of happy game-face still on, "I would never dare to hate you, Your Majesty"

"You are my king" She stated as she clasped her hands together on top of the table, ‘bastard’  

"You are the father of this nation", she modulated her voice into womanly sigh. It was textbook answer.

"And I am your servant.." Her inside was clinching together, ' you'

"Really? If you don't hate me then do you love me?" He asked now

She was shocked.

She was blindsided.

She turned her eyes to her hands. She then unclasped her hands and brought it to her side now. She knew that she would not stop her hand to go into solid fists ready to fly to his face if she left it at the table.

'Devil'

'Bastard'

'Dog'

She wanted to curse him. Of all things he had to ask, why does he have to ask the one question she wanted and hated to speak of.

'cause he is all shades of ing bastard who is a devil dog incarnate.'

He wanted to hurt her.

To humiliate her.

To torment her.

He was that cruel.

It had always been like that.

For the eight years of their marriage, ever since she became the princess consort  he was always cruel to her, only to her.

"My queen?" his voice was gentle but she felt like she heard a tinge of insult in his tone

"Pardon, Your majesty?" She asked acting like the perfect queen with demure sensibilities.

"I asked if you loved me?" he asked again. Direct. Strong. calculated. PRECISE. Always precise.

She nodded, 'I can play your game. For 8 years now i played your game and always been defeated but I can play your game now'.

His hand reached out to her cheeks and tilted her head up until they were eye to eye. He asked again, "Don't be coy with me, my queen. I want to hear the answer."

"DO YOU LOVE ME?" He was not smiling now.

His hand on her cheeks was warm. A contrast to his cold eyes that stared at her.

Eyes that were challenging her.

Eyes of the king that was demanding her to defy him.

Eyes of the devil that she despised.

Eyes of the man that she loved.

His hands grazed her face, his fingers gently caressing circles around her cheeks. 

She smiled while she was enduring this cruel sweet torture he subjecting her to.

'I will not be defeated by a bastard like you' as she looked straight to his eyes and answered, "Of course, I love you, Your Majesty."

She tilted her head to the side, seeming like a lover wanting to have more contact with him. Her cheeks now leaning more to his hand, "You are the King of my heart. I could never love anyone else.."

"Hmmnnnn? Really, My queen..."

His fingers continued to caress her face. Moving all over her cheeks until it reached her lower lip.

Her smile was still intact. His hands then moving to brush the outline of her lower lip.

"hhmmnnn...." she answered

His fingers were wringing havoc inside her.

She hated him.

But she also loved him.

He was torturing her.

But she was lauding in his very first touch on her body.

She knew he was playing her but her she was conflicted. Her heart and mind were both being pulled into different direction. Her heart was fluttering but her mind was disgusted.

He is playing and he was the toy, like always. Her mind knew that it's yet another game of 'how to hurt her all over again' but her heart wanted to hope.

They have played this game for eight years, but even with that duration of possible immunity, her heart doing somersaults. Even with her mind going to full on offense by making sure that her facade will never break. Her smile still intact.  

But her heart was in danger of bursting, of dying or being killed of stopping of breaking.

Yes, they have played this game for eight years. She knew the signs by now. His eyes give away his intent, of his hatred. But he was still touching her. He was touching her!

'No Gyuri. Don't!'

But her heart still wanted to jump, yet she also knew that after the jump she would fall and be crushed.

'DON'T. LET. HIM. WIN'

Her heart wanted to scream but she knew that her heart could break all over again.

'BASTARD!'

Silence now

'You don't love him' her mind tried to convince her.

His hand was still in her lips. She wanted to bite it off. HURT HIM.

Yet she wanted to it also. gently and thoroughly.

Then he smiled, "You know, My queen, you say you love me with your sweet smiling lips..."

He pulled her. His one hand still in her face and the other pulling her with his hands s around her waist.

He then brought her face to his. A breath away. She could feel her breath on her face.

"But your eyes, your eyes say a totally different statement”

She was trembling inside, she knew she should not ask but against her better judgment the words spilled out she asked, “And what are they saying?”

“They scream 'I HATE YOU!" He whispered menacingly

And before she could react, his lips crushed hers.

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