She smiled as she watched him walk in the middle of the courtyard. Even from a distance she could still feel his strong and precise gait. He walked with such precision born and breed to him like no other. He stopped as he greeted the people in his way, he was cool and collected. He gave them all equal attention, with the same precision. Then he continued on, leaving her sight of vision.

She had known him all her life. His presence imprinted into her whole being. His name weaved into her whole existence. His importance drummed into her all throughout her whole life. 

'But he..', she sighed and stopped her thoughts.

It was disloyal to think that way.

And it only hurts more.

She looked on towards the gate where he disappeared. She continued to stare from minutes into eons, waiting. She was frozen from where she stood, lingering. Hoping yet knowing that it was all for nothing.

She stood there until her presence was noted by the people. One by one, they hastily ran to her side. In a group, they bowed to her. In reverence they acknowledged her.

She stood regal and arresting. 

She smiled at them and decided it was time to leave. 

They all bowed again at her retreat. 

She walked in silence, yet her mind wanted to scream. She walked despondent, yet her soul raged. She stood majestic, yet heart was in havoc.

Her composure was at the perch of breaking but with self retrain embedded into her she stood in control, 'No, not yet.  not yet...'

As she walked with her control slowly sipping out, she remained smiling. She took a deep breath making sure she was firm and composed. She then smiled more regally, she bowed perfectly and she acknowledged more arrestingly all for the people to see.

'A couple more steps, a couple more steps...', she chanted within her. It was the same chant she had played in her head over and over again for years now. A chant for her struggles, a chant of comfort.

She hymned a melody now, on her way to her destination, it is always like this. A hymn that can be heard by the people around her. A hymn that had a happy tune about lovers and joy. A hymn for everyone to hear. A hymn for everyone to see. A hymn of deceit.

She continued to hymn while smiling, smiling to deceive others. She smiled and chanted like it was sunshine every day, especially this day. She looked outwardly happy, 'Yes, I am. Yes, I am. Happy.'

But inside it was different. Every step she took was with chains clasped around her ankles. Walking was so heavy and druggy. Time was moving yet their pace of walk was like molasses. 

She wanted to run but it was out of the question. She wanted to escape but it that would mean she lost control. And she never loses control. 

Then the bricks of her haven came into view, she was near. She walked faster now, not caring anymore what other may think. It was already within reach, her haven, just within seconds reach.

But as she got closer, her control slowly started to break. She felt her eyes hurt and blur.

'No!', she stubbornly demanded of herself.

Then she was inside the hall now. Just a couple more steps to her haven.

Tears sprang from her eyes when they opened her door for her.

She demanded of herself, "NO!"

Broken yet still composed she ordered, "No one comes into my room. NO ONE. That is an order. Whoever comes will die. "

And the doors were closed. She was alone.

Tears flowed. 

Heart broken. 

Soul battered. 

Mind bruised.

Now alone, she was free let go of some of her control. With energy leaving her legs, she slumped down on her feet, hurting and enduring.

She had endured for years. She had though that it will make her numb after years of familiarity of the pain. But years has just proven that one can never be immune to this. She would never be immune to this pain.

She tried to close her mind to everything, especially him.

But as she cried out, she knew that it was impossible. She had tried it countless times, but it had always been impossible. She could never close him out.

She could never do that because she had known him all her life. But most importantly, she had loved him all her life.

But to him, she was a bore.

A bother.

An inconvenience.

A disgusting person

Nothing.

She loved him and but she was nonexistent.

Slumped down, she cried silently. She gathered her feet together, embracing it. She was trying to contain her body and soul from shattering yet again. 

It was too painful. She was in misery. She was in torment. She was living in hell. 

Even through the years, she will never be immune to it. She can never stop her heart from breaking into a thousand pieces with his neglect. 

She wanted to hate him for the pain she felt, but she loved him too much. She loved him and she wanted only his heart.

And yet that one thing she wanted was the only thing he would forever deny her of.

She would willingly throw away everything for his heart. But she knew, from the moment he vowed never to love her that he would stand by it. He would stay composed and precise in his decision. He was always precise. And even in his neglect and hate he was precise. Always precise.

She loved him, yet he will never give his heart to her.

He is hers legally, but never his heart.

It was torment. It was hell.

Her control shattered then, she felt the endless painful spasm rocking her body. And now the room was filled with her sobs.

"Your majesty, are you okay?" called her attendant outside her bed chamber

"Your majesty"

"Your majesty please... Let us come in.."

Their worried voices were drowned in by her cries. She tried to compose herself again but it was useless.

She was like a dam that had been crushed and broken. 

Everything spilled out.

She was crushed and broken.

"Your majesty"

"Please, your majesty"

She continued to cry.

To Wail.

To weep.

Tormented.

In hell.

She is his Queen. He is her King

She is the Queen in love the King. He is the King who hated his Queen.

And there was nothing more painful than being the Queen, who is hated by the King.

a/n: I actually just thought of this story today and I havent thought of the title yet. Coincidentally, I am not yet sure who to put as the guy in the story. I am leaning into one guy that has been previosly linked to Gyuri, but I could still change my mind. If you have any suggestions, please comment away, I'm always open to suggestions and comments.
Anyway I also want to say that This has not been proofed read yet, So I just wanna say sorry for those who gets distracted with grammar, typos and writing errors. My mind is too active to concentrate in making the story perfect, i just needed to write it down before it gets out from my head. Sorry again.
And lastly, this story is for my enjoyment. So whoever and whenever I waould just like to let you know that this is dedicated numbero uno for me, selfish of me right hahaha. And also dedicated to Gyuri. hahahaha.
 

EDIT: there edited (disregard the comment at top regarding not profreading it) it. hahaha this story kinda is sad. but i usually am a MELO writer so its  no secret why I write like this. anyway ENJOY or maybe CRY and hurt with Gyuri.