dec. 9th

entry four ; seul mi

dear jongin,

There's this thing called guilt. It kinda came out from yesterday...in my previous letter.

The thing about guilt is, most of the time, it doesn't go away. It's heavy and painful. I don't have strong will nor do I think I have the emotional capacity to take pain anymore. So ... do I just keep feeling guilty? Do I let this anger directed towards myself go on?

Yeah, I'm angry. jongin, I'm angry at me. No one else but me.

The guilt is still here, jongin and I don't know what to do to make it go away.

Hey, do you know the song 'Guilty' by Marina & the Diamonds? Well, the song is catchy and relatable, you know.

So far, I think Poe and Marina knew me in another life.