A Friend's Confession - 2AM

"I've watched over you and stood silently, and hid my heart's feeling of sadness, for the reason, the reason that we had to stay as friends."

 

 

After school, you and Youngjae headed to the ice-cream shop you both liked. He bought a large bowl of different flavours and the both of you gulped it down while sitting by the window. You noticed him staring at you while you were enjoying your ice-cream.

“What? Do I have something on my face?”

“Ani,” he snapped out.

“You’ve been acting weird lately,” you commented casually as you the ice-cream off your spoon.

“What do you mean?”

“You suddenly want to go to school together, you randomly bought me chocolate, you held hands with me and you kept blushing. Am I just over-thinking things?”

He laughed at your assumptions, which made you regret pointing it out. But instead of teasing you back, he stayed silent for a while. “I can see why Daehyun kept telling me how he could never keep secrets away from you.”

You wondered what he meant by that comment. He leaned in closer to you before he spoke again.

“You weren’t over-thinking it,” he uttered as he stared right into you.

You blinked your eyes incessantly as his words slowly hit you. You felt your heart racing faster, so you tried clearing your throat to ease out the hanging silence. It was weird hearing another person’s confession towards you, but you knew perfectly well that you had never had any feelings for him.

“Youngjae-ah,” was all could mutter.

He smiled weakly as he sat back up. “I know you don’t have any feelings for me. And I know it’s too soon anyways. I understand.”

You continued staring at him, speechless.

“I honestly wasn’t planning to make a move on you. It was all in the spur of a moment. You’ve always been so nice to me and I just wanted to be extra nice towards you since Daehyun’s left us.”

“How..how long had you liked me?” you stuttered.

He chuckled before answering. “I think it’s inappropriate for me to answer that.”

“Waeyo?”

He didn’t answer and simply smiled back. It took you a while to figure out what he meant and when you did, you shot your head up at once.

“You mean, even before? You’ve liked me since before..before he..you know, since he left us” you said, excluding the bad words you had never been able to say out loud. “I’m so sorry I didn’t know!”

“What are you sorry for?” he laughed half-heartedly. “You were with Daehyun. It’s me who should be apologizing for having these feelings for my own best friend’s girlfriend.”

The both of you stayed quiet for a while, both unsure how to speak to each other. You liked Youngjae though, and loved his company so you hated the sudden awkwardness. You could see how you’ve made him feel bad about himself.

“I hope you won’t hate me for this,” he mumbled, not meeting your eyes. “I hadn’t wanted to confess because I value our friendship. But I don’t want to regret not telling you how I feel about you.”

 “We’ve been friends for 6 years. These things could happen.. right?”

He lowered his head and you saw him closing his eyes, and knew immediately that that wasn’t what he had wanted to hear. You realized you had never seen him taking an interest in other girls, and wondered how you were so blind in not seeing it sooner.

“Mian,” the both of you said at the same time.

Wanting to break the awkwardness, you scooped up a big spoonful of ice-cream and offered to feed him. He continued staring at you and contemplated whether to accept it. After a bit of persuasion, he finally placed his mouth into the spoon. You placed your hand on top of his and smiled sadly.

“I would never hate you,” you said. “But you remind me of him so much. When I’m with you, it feels like I’m with Daehyun. I know I’m supposed to be over him by now. So I’m afraid that if I were to fall for you, I would only be seeing him, instead of you. And I don’t want to make you feel like his shadow. Because I know you deserve better.”

He smiled sadly at you before turning his head to watch the outside view. His lips moved as he mumbled something, and your heart broke when you finally captured what he was saying to himself.

“I’ll always lose to you, right Daehyun-ah?”

 

A/N:

I kept my promise haha! Posted on Thursday, since I was on medical leave yesterday, and took leave today so I've got a lil time.

I'm not gonna post another chapter till next week or so, since it's festive season next week.

I'm trying to stop myself from being a fangirl in KPOP. BAP is the only kpop group (as in a dance group) that I like, so it should be easy (or not). Next week's gonna be the deciding factor for me. BAP's comeback 6th August YAY. Nappeun saram, nappeun saram~~

If I can handle the pain of not being able to attend LOE here in SG on the 8th.. then I'll declare myself not a fangirl who spazzes ever so easily like how I am right now. *takes a deep breathe and brace myself* I don't know why I'm writing this here. Oh right, just wanna warn that maybe..just maybe.. I won't update that much in the future. Probably not since I love writing. You can just skip this part.

Let's support BAP, shall we? Coffee Shop and Hurricane made me cry tears of joy, Bad Man would probably kill me:)

And since I'm talking abt that, might as well promote my other bias as well. FNC jjang: CNBLUE Japanese comeback and AOA Black's MOYA fighting^^

 

Anyways..Who's excited for BAP?? Their teaser pictures are DAEBAK right?? My Dae..and my Jae..and my Gukkie.. just stahp. Ahh, I should post a chapter to celebrate their comeback!