All Too Well

I ignored it.

It was rather easy for me to ignore my feelings after seeing that poster. It took a day, but once I went back to work the next day, I was able to forget about it completely. After all, that was one of the tips I learned while in rehab – feelings can be wrong. You can’t trust them.

A few weeks later, and I was completely over it. Over a month later, and I had completely forgotten it. My life was back to normal, and I wouldn’t let him disrupt it anymore.

“Here is your food,” I said as I placed three dishes down on the table, “Please let me know if you need anything else.” The customers smiled at me and I returned it, bowing quickly before I left them to eat. I went to the table about two away and smiled.

“Are you done?” I asked, seeing the empty plates on the table, “I’ll take that. Would you like anything else? Dessert perhaps?” The young couple ordered a dessert to share and I took their dirty plates to the kitchen to put their dessert order in.

“I need an order of the deep fried mantou,” I told Ji in the kitchen.

“Coming right up,” Ji called, placing a different plate on the line for Baoyu to take. Just as I turned around, I saw a bunch of guys wearing hats and sunglasses entering the restaurant. They talked to Lihua at the front and she led them to the back room, which was usually reserved for large parties.

“Order up, Mei!” Qing called, placing the last plate on the tray for me to bring to another table. I snapped out of my daze and grabbed the large tray.

“Thanks, Qing!” I said, balancing the tray on one hand while taking two more plates on my other hand. I worked my way through the crowded restaurant to the correct table where I placed the plates down.

“Is there anything else I can get you?” I asked, to which the young family of four shook their heads and thanked me. I smiled, “Ok, enjoy!” As I was leaving the table, Lihua approached me.

“Take care of the back room, please,” she instructed, “Ten people. Jaeyoon will assist.”

I nodded, “Ok, let me just get a dessert to a table and then I’ll go back.” Lihua nodded and touched my shoulder as she went back to the front to see if any more seats were open for the people on the waitlist. I ran back to the kitchen and saw Jaeyoon gathering plates on a tray.

“Hey,” I said, “You’re going to be helping me with the back room, ok?” Jaeyoon smiled at me and nodded as she brought the tray out to her table. I found the dessert on the line and quickly picked it up to bring to the young couple table.

“Do you need anything else?” I asked the couple. They both shook their heads and thanked me. I nodded, “Alright, enjoy! Let me know if you need anything else.” I left the couple alone and quickly examined all my tables, making sure that they were all taken care of. I saw Jaeyoon taking care of another table, so I decided to go to the back room and get their drink orders myself. That much I could manage on my own. I ran back to the kitchen and grabbed my notepad off of the counter. Usually, I didn’t need it. I was pretty good at taking orders and memorizing them. However, for ten people, I needed the notepad to keep track.

Once I had my notepad, I headed to the back room, making sure I had a pen as well, and slid the door open, gently. As soon as I did though, I froze as my eyes landed on the person directly across from the entrance.

He didn’t even look up at me, as he was busy looking at the menu. He was talking to the person next to him, pointing out things on his menu and speaking to him in a mixture of Korean and Mandarin. He smiled when the guy said something and then laughed. That laugh…it hasn’t changed. Nothing about him has changed. He’s just as handsome now as he was the last time I saw him – almost four years ago.

Then, he suddenly looked up at me, and I didn’t even realize what I was doing until the door was completely shut. I leaned my back against the wall and took deep breaths. Why does he still have this effect on me? Why can’t I just be my normal self when I see him? Oh please, I couldn’t even be my normal self when I saw a poster of him! What makes seeing the real, living and breathing person any easier? I put my hand to my chest and tried to calm down. But the questions that kept going through my head weren’t helping the situation. What if he recognizes me? What if he tries to talk to me? What if he announces to the entire room that we dated once? If he’s really in that EXO group that I saw on the poster over a month back, then that means he’s famous! What if…

“Hey, Mei-unnie,” Jaeyoon said, approaching me. I looked at her and she seemed worried, “Are you alright?”

I quickly stepped away from the wall and nodded, “Yeah, just waiting for you.”

Jaeyoon smiled, “Ok, let’s go.” I nodded and took one last deep breath before opening the door and placing a confident smile on my face.

“Good evening,” I said, making sure to look anywhere but at him, “My name is Mei and this is Jaeyoon. We’ll be taking care of you tonight. Can we start you off with some drinks?” I realized I had their attention as the ten people in the room were looking at me. I refused to look at him or even acknowledge him.

“I’m sorry,” one of the younger guys said in broken Korean, similar to my own, “Do you speak Mandarin?” I looked at the guy who spoke and saw he was rather handsome. He had dark circles under his eyes and a thin face.

“Yes, I do,” I responded in Mandarin, “However, my assistant does not. If it’s easier though, I can speak in Mandarin.”

“That would make it a lot easier,” the guy sitting next to him said in Mandarin. This guy was also very handsome. I could tell he was very tall by the way he was sitting with his legs straight out instead of folded. With the way this table was set up, if he crossed his legs, they wouldn’t be able to fit underneath.

“Ok, just speak to me in whatever language is comfortable, and I’ll respond back in that language,” I informed him, “Now, what would you like to drink?” I quickly whispered to Jaeyoon the situation and she nodded in understanding. I started with the tall guy’s order. I went around the table clockwise in order to make sure that I took his drink order last, noticing that only the younger guys spoke in Mandarin, as well as one older guy. The two women with them spoke in Korean and the other older guy was Korean as well. One of the guys tried to order in Mandarin, but eventually switched to Korean when I couldn’t understand what he was trying to tell me. Finally, I got to the guy sitting next to him.

“Um, I’ll have the cola please?” he said in broken Mandarin. However, I understood it and nodded. I saw his hand pat the guy on the back in encouragement and then I moved on to him, keeping my eyes on my notepad.

“And for you, sir?” I asked.

“I’ll have the same as him, please,” he said, nonchalantly. I risked a glance at him and saw him look once at me, smile politely, and then look back at the menu. I quickly looked back at my notepad, feeling my heart sink.

“Alright,” I said, trying to keep my voice happy and peppy, but failing, “We’ll be right back with those.” I closed the notepad and left the room with Jaeyoon following. I handed her the notepad and told her quickly that I was running to the restroom and I’ll come help her in a second. I ran to the bathroom and locked the door just in time for all of my emotions to explode.

He didn’t even recognize me. He looked at me as if I was a stranger. He had no idea who I was. How could he forget so easily? How could he not remember my face? We had so many great times together, and after four years, he just forgot everything? I haven’t changed that much. The only thing different about me is longer hair and scars on my wrists, but he couldn’t see me through those? Why? I felt tears slip down my cheeks, and I didn't even know why. I should be over him – over everything that we once had, everything that he let go. But still, I can't stop myself from remembering...

I remember all the time we spent together. I remember the first day I met him – on my thirteenth birthday. I remember when he gave me that card and wrote his name in the stone beside my name. I remember when we played soccer together with his friends, and my team finally beat his team (for I was always the team’s downfall). I remember when he first told me he liked me, and how happy he seemed to be when I told him I liked him too. I remember our first date as a couple, our first hug, our first kiss. I remember telling him about my family, and I remember his hug as I cried. I remember as he rubbed my back and told me everything would be alright. I remember when he told me that he would always be there to protect me – that he was my nightingale. I remember how I used to spend night after night at his house, and how his parents always loved having me over. I remember him sneaking into the guest bedroom to spend the night with me, and how we’d never sleep because we were too busy talking and laughing. I remember it all. Those three years that we spent together were the happiest three years of my life, but they obviously meant nothing to him.

I remember every second of those three whole years, but he can’t even remember my face.

OMG HE'S BACK! O_O So yeah, I hope you guys like this chapter! At first, when I was choosing the song, I couldn't quite find the right one. I was looking for a song about loving an ex again, but the ones I found just didn't quite cut it for me. But, as I was writing the last paragraph, T-Swift's song came on, and I suddenly started crying and I was like "Oh my god I have to use this!" Even though I didn't want to use another T-Swizzle song after the last chapter...but it fit so well with Mei's feelings! She still loves Luhan and she remembers all of the great times they had together. But then she thinks about how he suddenly left and broke her heart, and she feels angry toward him. But seeing him again here - happy and just like how she remembers - she can't help but still love him. But she knows it's wrong to keep loving him after what he did to her - basically, she has no idea what she's feeling or what to do. All she thinks about by the end is the great times they had together and how he can't recognize her. In the next chapter though, we'll see a different perspective, so look forward to it! ;)

Anyway, thanks for reading, commenting, subscribing, and upvoting this story! I'm so glad you guys like it! :) ♥