A week later, Ryeowook was already cooking when we walked out of our room; "Breakfast in three minutes" He shouts cheerfully. Sungmin was off, making sure all members were awake, so I sat down. Yesung was already there, looking better than he did that night in the kitchen. We never talked about it. I had the certainty we never will. Neither of us will ever have the courage to bring that up.

During breakfast, everything was normal. All the members talked among themselves, Sungmin and Ryeowook giggled together as usual. And just my stupid head could not give me a rest.

"Let's go on a date" I whisper to Sungmin before I could change my mind. He turned to me surprised at first, and then brightened. "Sure, why not" he smiled, "it has been ages since we had one, hasn’t it?"

So for the next few days I kept my mind on that. I talked to our manager so we both could have a day off at the same time, and tried planning a weekend for the two of us. It was challenging, finding places we both could love and enjoy, while making sure they were unfamiliar enough so we wouldn't be bothered by fans.

Press these days didn’t concern us as much as it did during our early days. We were getting to that point in our careers where it wasn’t just as big a deal what we did with our lives, compered to say; one of the idols who just had their debut, dating someone.

We were famous, sure, but we rarely placed ourselves on the headlines these days. Not even when things were happening right under the paparazzi's noses, and not even when Heechul hyung was being Heechul hyung. Actually, he is probably the reason we don’t. When both the fans and the press get to a certain point when they don’t bat an eye seeing 30 year old members kiss each other on stage, they pass almost everything as weird Super Junior being weird Super Junior.

It was brilliant when you think of it; after seeing the living hell Yunho and Jaejoong had to go through in their time, we had to keep in mind how lucky we really are.

Sobs. Someone is crying again. Urge. I get up to find the source and end up in Ryeowook and Yesung's room. I knocked on the door lightly and opened it with a little nudge.

Ryeowook was sitting on his bed, crying. Yesung kneeling in front of him, whispering something, probably trying to comfort him from whatever it was that he was crying about.

I hear a gasp from behind me, and suddenly I am pushed aside when Sungmin runs in and climbs to hug Wook immediately "what happened baby?" I hear him ask and Ryeowook just buries his face in his shoulder.

I sigh. This is getting old real quick. Yesung got up and walked out quietly. I follow him, annoyed "what happened?" and he just looked at me hopeless.

"I don’t know. I didn’t have the time to find out. I just walked in and he was crying, I try to make sense of it but before I could even hug him or understand anything at all his little hero comes in to save the day!" and with that he turned and climbed up the stairs.

A few hours, and some loud screaming from practically everyone later, I'm sitting in my room listening to Sungmin saying something about a fight and that he needs to be there and that of course, he will be sleeping with Ryeowook tonight.

I slam my laptop close and look up to him, "Why won't you let his boyfriend take care of him for once? Let them solve this one on their own!" he looked at me and remained silent for a long moment.

"Kyuhyun, don’t do this. Don’t make me choose between the two of you."

"Why? Because you will choose him? What are we even doing than, Sungmin? Why even bother? Clearly we are a chore to one another"

He's taken aback. He did not see that coming. Really Sungmin?. He seemed hurt and just maybe I pushed too far, overreacted. "Don’t answer that" I get up and walk out. Knowing he won't be there when I will come back.