Don’t leave us behind

Blurred faces that pass us. Wind that blows against us. Time that moves on without us. Don’t you dare leave us behind…

          Death had never crossed my mind before. At least if it had, it was always vague, perhaps from watching the news. Seeing a dying flower, watching the autumn come. For sad people, everything is just a moment. Fleeting happiness and fleeting thoughts of never becoming old. Of never dying, leaving the one you love behind.

I wondered if I’d forget Taeyeon.

Fluttering my eyes open it was dark, the window curtains were open and the sound of rain clouded my senses. I felt so warm. With Taeyeon beside me, I felt so warm.

Turning my head I could make-out the outline of her lashes resting perfectly still on the flesh beneath her eyes. I could make-out the outline of her nose and the way it curved downward connecting to the pouty plumpness of her lips. Parting slightly with each breath she took.

Her snores were light, the rise and fall of her chest almost lulling me back to sleep. I dragged the pads of my fingers lightly across the smoothness of her arm before clamping my hand around her own. It was limp and that scared me. I wondered what she was dreaming of, or if she was even dreaming at all. She opened her eyes, squinting turning to face me. The fact that her hand immediately gripped mine the moment she awoke had me drowning in euphoria. She got me so high just with a touch I forgot she was my drug. My only drug made especially for me.

“Tiff?” She whispers, scooting closer to me. Allowing me to fall deeper into her. Deeper than I already was.

Thunder rang in our ears. I could feel the Goosebumps cover her entire skin. Head to toe. And that’s when I realized that everything in fact was just a moment. A dying, breathing so very alive moment. Dying… I could die right here and now if it meant being stuck with her forever. Caught in a loop with her hand in mine, her sleepy eyes staring back at me and her Goosebumps tickling my skin.

I press my lips to hers. Kissing her softly letting her melt into me. The rain outside began to fall heavier. It was almost as loud as the thunder ringing in the grey skies.

Her hair was sticking to her face. Her neck was begging for me to kiss it, and her eyes were cloudy as usual. It was the thing I know I’d miss the most when I was gone.

Taeyeon’s silent moans filled the night air and oddly it was louder than anything I ever heard. Every part of her found its way into every little fiber of my heart. Every little fold.  

And I knew, I just knew. She would always be there.

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