Yixing wakes up to aching on his lower back and an annoying ringtone buzzing on his left ear. He fumbles a little, looking for the device somewhere stuck under his pillows, until finally picking it up without even bothering to look at the id caller, his eyes aren’t even open yet.

“Who’s this?” He croaks out.

He hears a familiar chuckle.

“I’m picking you up.” Jongin says and Yixing creaks open his eyes groggily to look at the clock on the wall. It’s almost midday, alright, yet he can’t possibly understand why Jongin is waking him up considering he was awake just as late as Yixing yesterday.

“Why?”

“Junmyeon’s orders.” The other says simply. “I’m there in thirty minutes. Wash up quick.” And he hangs up.

Yixing chokes a wait that never comes out and faces his phone with a dumb expression.

The shower took longer that Yixing hoped because he spent more time looking at the mirror trying to see himself again and letting the water hit his face harshly as he reconsidered the reasons that got him into this ordeal that is his life right now.

A little more than half an hour later and Jongin rings at his door and it’s Yixing’s mother who answers. Yixing has a mild panic attack and dresses his shirt hastily as he walks out his bedroom door and puts on the first pair of shoes he finds. Jongin takes off his sunglasses and smiles the brightest he can and compliments Yixing’s mother politely to which she responds equally as amicably. The scene is giving Yixing a stomach ache.

He pushes through and grabs Jongin’s arm to pull him away from his house before he could introduce himself.

“I’ll be back soon mom.” He says over his shoulder not really sure if he’s to keep his words. “What are you doing?” He asks Jongin the moment they’re far enough away from his house.

Jongin just laughs.

“Your mother is really pretty. You look like her.” He pats Yixing’s cheek and starts to walk towards his car.

“That doesn’t answer my question!” Yixing snaps a bit annoyed but follows him. “You can’t just knock on my door, okay? She doesn’t know what I’m doing and I’d prefer if it remained like that.”

“I wanted to see where you lived.”

“Why?”

“Just because.” Jongin shrugs and unlocks his car with the remote. “Let’s go for a tour. I’ll buy you lunch.” He says with a bright smile, placing his sunglasses back on his nose and opening the car’s door to step inside.

“What?” Yixing stays rooted outside for a second before entering the car as well. “I thought Junmyeon had-”

“He didn’t. He’s probably contemplating suicide somewhere.” Jongin talks lightly like Junmyeon could be indecisive towards what clothes to wear, as if his words don’t mean what they mean.

“What?” Yixing’s voice cracks at the edge.

Jongin laughs but it isn’t sincere.

“Nothing…I want to take you somewhere.”

“So you just tricked me?”

“That’s putting it roughly. But in my defense you’re very easily fooled.”

Yixing frowns as he puts the seatbelt on because Jongin has already pulled out of the driveway and started to drive.

“How is that any defense and honestly Junmyeon is my boss, I didn’t think you’d use him to lure me.”

Jongin laughs.

“My bad, my bad…”

“Where are you taking me?”

“Just…somewhere.” Jongin says again.

Maybe he’s right, maybe Yixing does get fooled easily and Jongin is planning something that will only bring him pain and trauma. Who knows. And Yixing knows he’s young, way too young to look like he does and to be doing what he’s doing for a living. But then again so is Yixing and so is Junmyeon to be running such an agency. But that’s really all non-important for now and Yixing is actually scared as to what Jongin’s little brain is manipulating behind those pretty brown eyes. It can’t be a job though because that has to run by Junmyeon so what else could it be. What else has made Jongin pick up Yixing personally.

The drive to “somewhere” happens to be three hours into another city. But Yixing only finds that out when they arrive.

“How’s everything going?” Jongin asks somewhere along the way. His left elbow rests against the windowsill as he bites his thumbnail and his right hand grips the wheel tightly. He drives with ease and he looks good doing it too and he knows he looks good.

“Everything?” Yixing doesn’t want this question. Didn’t want it from Junmyeon, sure as hell doesn’t want it from Jongin. Back in the day playing dumb and bad korean speaker worked but Jongin is immune and the idiot speaks chinese above all.

“Things with your client.” Jongin clarifies in careful mandarin. It’s not perfect but pretty good unlike what Yixing had expected.

“Fine.” Yixing answers in korean.

“I wasn’t going to bring it up but, like Junmyeon, I worry.”

“Worry…” Yixing repeats in faint annoyance. “I don’t need you two to worry.”

“You rather do this by yourself?”

Yixing keeps silent. No. And yes. No, he doesn’t want to be alone and he knows he needs someone to hold on to and somehow he thought Junmyeon would be that anchor but as things progressed Yixing found himself better off being alone…better off coping with it by himself. It was never easy for him to share his feelings anyway and besides Junmyeon seems to have a lot on his plate to be having to deal with Yixing’s fears.

But Jongin is talking and Yixing feels good listening to his voice, just being next to him feels nice. He laughs a lot unnecessarily but the smile makes up for it.

“This… is not something I’m used to. Any of it.”

“No one expects you to be this thing you’re not Yixing so don’t. Everyone was a bit apprehensive when Junmyeon told us about you, especially when we found out you weren’t even interested in men,”

Yixing remembers Jongdae’s words.

“and that’s why we want to help you. Don’t shut us off.” Jongin says.

“Junmyeon has a lot to worry about.” If Jongin’s words are anything to go by, more than a lot.

“That’s why I’m here. You can talk to me. I’ll handle Junmyeon, always have.”

Yixing doesn’t know what to say next, he’s not sure if he wants to say anything at all. He’s touched that Jongin is even acting this way, being caring and all, because he really didn’t expect it. But what could he possibly say? Hey Jongin, Kris ed me now what? ‘Cause you know he doesn’t really talk much, is that common? Let’s share stories. It seems like a horror novel and he really doesn’t want to get into that sort of prompt.

After a bit of wheedling Yixing into telling him a few things, Jongin eventually asks him if he’s is taking the right measures, being careful and that sort of thing, and he finds out that, no, he isn’t. It’s not like Yixing didn’t know but it’s like, whenever he had to see Kris, his brain would shut down and block all rational thinking and forgot to be responsible at all.

“I’m sure Kris is smarter than that but just be careful.” Jongin tells him and ends it there.

The rest of the trip is spent pretty silently regarding their words, keeping them to a minimum. Jongin had opened his window all the way down and blasted the radio loudly and let his car reach the hundred miles even on the busiest roads. This when he’s not on the highway because that’s when he reaches above the fast one eighty. He’s obviously done it before, if not constantly, because he moves by and through the other cars with ease and without much of a blink. He cuts a red light at some point and Yixing holds his breath. The feeling might be exhilarating yet the eminent danger is too frightening. And Yixing thinks of Junmyeon.

It’s only when they’re already in another city seated by the deck of a café Jongin made sure they had to go to, that Yixing finally recovers his speech and speaks, voicing his inside thoughts. He had lost his words around the time Jongin decided to play with their lives and be a speed racer for a day.

So much for lunch.

“Is Junmyeon alright?”

Jongin is distracted looking at his surroundings so Yixing’s voice makes him turn to look at him with a bit of wonder.

“Hm yeah…he’ll be fine.”

It doesn’t actually answer Yixing’s question. It’s annoying because what Jongin said earlier is pretty serious but he seems determined to ignore it.

“You—he…” Yixing sighs. It feels like he has to advise a child not to touch the scorching stove and that bothers him a little. “You should be careful.” He says almost repeating Jongin’s tone when he had said the same to him. Jongin worries and well, Yixing does also.

Jongin smiles.

“Junmyeon doesn’t even drive badly. I don’t even know what happened. Don’t worry though I like a little fun that’s all but I’m careful.”

“He cut a red light.” Yixing informs with a serious tone.

“Ah. I see.” Jongin keeps his smile up. He understands what Yixing is saying but is obviously refusing to admit it’s a problem.

Albeit Yixing wanting to tell him how dangerous it is to drive the way he does he’s a bit surprised that Junmyeon hadn’t told him about it.

“Is he really going to be alright?” Yixing questions again and he wants to ask if Jongin is because his eyes turned sad all of a sudden although he’s still softly smiling.

“He’s a complicated guy.” The younger comments.

Yixing keeps quiet to let Jongin continue.

“He doesn’t think whatever he does is ever enough. Honestly I don’t think he ever will.”

“He does more than enough.”

“That’s what I keep saying…I tell him that every day but it’s like speaking into a wall. He doesn’t really care for what I have to say.”

Yixing doesn’t believe that's true but he isn’t going to contradict Jongin, there’s no use.

“You shouldn’t let this burden you too much though. Like I said I’ll take care of Junmyeon.” Jongin tells him seemingly aware of Yixing’s constant musing.

Yixing isn’t any more relieved but Jongin doesn’t look like he wants to talk about it any longer, the boy is worrying his bottom lip under his teeth and he looks absent, so Yixing keeps quiet until he feels like it’s appropriate to speak again.

It’s Jongin who breaks the silence first though after he’s done martyring his brain with thoughts.

“I used to live here with him before…before Seoul. I like to come here sometimes.” He sighs shortly, talking vaguely, just admiring the sea view in front of him. The wind is blowing quite sturdily and the dark locks of his hair are flying along its direction. He looks so young like this, Yixing thinks, albeit with eyes that seem too deep from someone his age. “Where did you grow up?” Jongin asks then, turning to look back at Yixing who’s been lost studying him.

“Changsha, China.” Yixing answers.

“That’s right.” Jongin says like he had just realized Yixing was chinese. “Luhan was born in Beijing.” He tells with a smile. “He keeps saying he wants to go back but he never actually does.” He spins the glass set on the table, something with vodka he ordered earlier. “Would you like to go back?”

Yixing hesitates and stares at Jongin’s hand set on his glass. He thinks he knows what this is. It takes two to play this game. So Yixing decides then that he should let Jongin take a peak.

“I only liked it there because of my family. We moved because my father died.” He tells frankly and unavoidably lets his gaze drop to the floor.

“If it serves of any consolation I never actually had parents so…at least you met yours.” Jongin tries to give Yixing a small smile despite the slight resentment present in his words. “And you have your mother…she’s really beautiful.”

Yixing flashes a glimpse of his dimple nonetheless because even despite himself Jongin is still trying to turn things around so Yixing won’t feel so bad.

“So is Junmyeon like your legal guardian?” He asks. Sounds idiotic considering Jongin is twenty turning twenty one but it’s something possible knowing that they’ve met for a long time, five years, if Yixing heard right. He’s quite curious to know more and it’s hard to get any of them to actually answer his more pertinent questions properly and he knows it’s more than he can ask for since it’s not really his business to in their private lives but right now it was Jongin to grab him by the hand and bring him into his world so Yixing thinks that he should be able to push the door a little wider open.

Jongin laughs and sips on his drink before talking.

“I was the one giving him the name, you know.” He says. “He’s not my guardian though, not legally, never was… I didn’t allow him. I actually asked for emancipation since I had found a job already by then.” He places his drink on the table. “He did save me and gave me the life I have right now. That’s a thing he does...save people even if he doesn’t realize it.”

“I’m thankful for his help.” Yixing says. Jongdae’s words ring again, remembering how he said it was usual for Junmyeon to just help out anyone. And this pains Yixing because if this is any true he doesn’t understand why Junmyeon would think he doesn’t do enough.

“I don’t think he wanted to help you though. Not this way.”

“He offered me money first.”

“And he would’ve given you a lot for nothing in return if you had said yes.”

“Still… I couldn’t accept it…” Yixing is quick to add.

“You’re too proud.” Jongin says as a matter of fact and not a depreciative comment. “But Yixing…” Yixing looks at him. “…don’t go as far as to do something you don’t want to because you might regret it later, if not tomorrow somewhere along the run.”

“It’s okay…really.” He says not sure if it’s a lie or not. It hurts…for the most of it, it mostly hurts his pride as a person who always believed in hard work and compensation but it is alright…he thinks he could actually overcome this.

“I hope so…because not every guy is going to be Kris.” Jongin comments.

Yixing nods and stutters a bit on his words.

“I--I know.”

It’s weird how Jongin seems to be a step ahead of him and his thoughts. It’s true though and Yixing knows it is. Kris is good looking and, for the less demeaning part of it all, sort of considerate, during anyway, and as far as Yixing is aware that’s rare.

“Have you been with him?” Yixing asks a bit shyly. He isn’t really sure why but maybe if Jongin knows Kris then it’ll help Yixing understand him better.

“No. I know him, he’s friends with Junmyeon, but he never spared me a look really. To be completely honest I didn’t even know he swung that way.”

“Oh…they’re friends.”

Jongin looks at him.

“Not sure why but yeah. Does that bother you?”

Yixing meets his eyes.

“No… It’s just that Kris is…never mind.” He’s not sure how to phrase it without it sounding stupid. It doesn’t bother him, no, but he could say it’s just a bit weird to think of Kris and Junmyeon as friends, they seem so completely different that Yixing can’t see the possible focus of their conversations. Thinking of Kris having friends at all seems oddly alien. It’s just upsetting that he seems to be the only one Kris doesn’t direct words at. But then again Yixing never really attempted to engage into any topics either, not like he’d know how.

“From what I know…he’s not a man of many reactions but I was told he's a nice person. Not much of a talker though."

Yixing nods stupidly for a second but is determined to find out if Jongin can read his mind.

“Why did you bring me here?” He asks after a bit of staring at Jongin trying to see if this mind thing is a two way street. No luck though.

Jongin simply smiles.

“You think too much.” He answers.

“So?” It’s true but Yixing hates that Jongin knows that, that Jongin seems to know his brain better than he does for some weird- reason, and he doesn’t really understand what that has to do with anything.

“Think less.”

Yixing frowns at his words.

“Because it’s that easy.” He croons sarcastically.

“You’re not a failure Yixing.” Jongin speaks short after although he’s not looking at him.

It breaks something inside Yixing then. Those words hit him ratter hard and sharp. The heaviness set on them weigh on his shoulders like dead bodies because that is how he feels, that’s how he’s been feeling for a long time and it’s not something he can shake off easily or at all and he’s tried.

“And you’re not less of a man for doing what you’re doing.” Jongin continues softly. “If anything you’re more of one. Because you’re doing it against your very self and still you’re doing it and for the right reasons and that’s what matters. No one has the right to point a finger at you. Not even yourself. This job doesn’t define who you are.” He finishes his glass.

Yixing keeps silent and stares at Jongin with eyes that threaten to cry.

Jongin pays for his drink and leaves a generous tip and pulls Yixing to his car again to take him “somewhere fun” according to him. Yixing wonders why Jongin is even bothering to do all of this for him but he lets the younger have his way. It seems like he needs it too anyway.

The car is silent. The sun is starting to set and Jongin smiles at the road.

---

Get Lucky plays loudly in the speakers of the club. They’re back in the city and it’s already night time. It was an odd trip, if Yixing could say so, most of it spent in Jongin’s car really, but somehow it made him feel less alone, less miserable. Jongin is all easy smiles, sly glances and practiced words but he’s genuine.

Right now his pretty eyes widen at the sound of music and at the view of people dancing.

We've come too far to give up who we are

So let's raise the bar and our cups to the stars

Jongin sings along and follows the lyrics raising his shot glass he just ordered and looking at Yixing straight in the eye.

“To misery!” He yells trying to be heard over the music.

Yixing laughs and grabs his glass to raise it too.

“To misery!”

They down their drinks and Jongin is quick to ask the bartender for two more.

“To us!” He yells again and Yixing repeats his words and they drink.

“Come with me.” Jongin talks into Yixing’s ear a little after.

We're up all night for good fun

He pulls Yixing’s wrist and he takes him to the dance floor.

Dancing with Jongin is liberating and that’s an understatement. Yixing sort of wished he had danced with him the first time he had asked. The scene seems to happen in slow motion and Yixing has not a care in the world at the moment. The sound swallows his worries and Jongin steals his attention from everyone else. The world seems to vanish for a while.

Jongin presses his body close and wraps his arms around Yixing’s neck, leaning his forehead against his, dancing closely.

What is this I'm feeling?

And Jongin kisses Yixing’s lips gently, catching the top lip first and then aiming for both.

If you wanna leave I'm ready

It doesn’t linger and isn’t intended to be that way. It’s a peck, quick and easy. And for the first time Yixing doesn’t overthink it.

So they keep dancing.

We're up all night to get lucky.

i'm terribly sorry for the amount of time i took to update but i had things to worry about, college and whatnot and then i got family visits ugh and i took forever to write this chapter bc i wasn't sure what to write and i wanted to get this done so i could focus into kray's relationship. lol anyway i'll try to not repeat this but i don't know what will happen since i start college in september. but even if it takes me forever i will finish this fic!! >o<