It happens on a Tuesday and Tuesday’s usually are as boring as any other day in Yixing’s life. Summer is at the end and the nights are getting fresher. It’d be a relieving thing if Yixing wasn’t worried about how he’ll be able to afford a heater.

And that conquest for money is what tells his story and of those that change his life.

It starts with a fairly pale, fairly young man by the name of Kim Junmyeon.

When Yixing meets Junmyeon there’s blood, the smell of gasoline and burnt tires. Cars crashed into each other, people hovering over the scene but no movement and Yixing, as the patient man he’ll never be, resolves to act before thinking and does what he shouldn’t have done, what’s not advisable to do or so the people around him were warning him.

It’s never time to act as a hero, his father used to say but Yixing never really listened to his father’s words when he was alive and now he sort of regrets it. And if he doesn’t now maybe he will later.

♦ --- ♦

It all occurred when Yixing was on his way home, dejected, after, and pretty unsuccessfully, having gone to try and find job that would, or so he hoped, save his life.

Because money is short, everywhere really, but Yixing’s is shorter, he believes. Losing his house is on the line. Losing his mother is on the line. Losing his life is on the line. It’s never the time to act as a hero – and if he were to be a hero he’d be a fool one - but for once Yixing wished he could. So he tries and he tries.

“Yixing…”

It was dauntingly early from the same day. That Tuesday. His mother’s eyes were as sad as he could bear. Too heartbreaking for words. He always does the impossible to avoid them, to avoid them when they’re set on him, to avoid facing them, facing her, because if you ignore something long enough then…maybe…it won’t be there anymore. He ignored his father’s death, he ignored his mother’s illness, ignored the flunk of his last college year. But it’ll come a time when he’ll have to realize that things are real and things are being taken away from him and that if he stays really still and quiet that it’ll all go away and never come back.

“I’m out of medication.” His mother said standing by the door frame of the kitchen, sad eyes trained on the nearly empty bottle on her delicate hands.

Yixing has forgotten how soft her touch was.

The night is probably the worse time of the day. When the dark settles in and the cold reaches his bones it’s when Yixing realizes how miserable he is. He doesn’t cry because the choked up sobs from the room near from his are enough to have him swallow thickly but when the clock has passed the night hours and reached the morning one’s he’ll still be starring absentmindedly at his peeling ceiling…wishing, praying, that one day something good has to happen.

Please. Please.

“I’ll go by the drug store later. Don’t worry.” He said not daring to look up from his mug of coffee that tasted worse than sewage, if he had to guess that is.

“I only worry about you son.” She had answered then, cracking the smallest smile, and it had her son gripping his mug harder and more desperately.

“I know.”

This had made him decide to try harder and be better and put on the only white dress shirt he had inside his drawers that used to belong to his old school uniform and, thank god, still fits him. It fits him now, he knows, considering he has become a lot thinner. The pants were still there too so he also put them to good use and dressed them, fixed his hair, dark and long, wrapping it in a small ponytail and flew out the door at the first chance he got without letting his mother see him or wish him good luck.

The refusals had been harsh. Suited man after suited man, restaurants and even cafes closing their doors at his face with that discerning look that told Yixing he wasn’t good enough. He tried his best, offered a smile and a bow, polite words that would make the first lady of China look bad and gave all he had, all besides his degree. And that was enough to have him escorted out.

He decides to wander around that part of town then, letting the sun touch him and trying to lose his mind somewhere along the way, let the worries fly for a bit, away from him, just for a bit. He got distracted because it’s that easy for him and that was when the crash happened. Maybe the crash of the cars or maybe the sudden crash of Junmyeon right into his life.

Junmyeon had smiled at him from the floor, after having being pulled out of the car, with the most impish eyes Yixing had ever seen on someone.

Yixing learns his name at the hospital from a pretty and smiling nurse when the other finally got operated on. Junmyeon learns his from a stuttering whisper.

“You’re pretty.” He says, burning fire into Yixing’s cheeks. Junmyeon had just gotten out of surgery so Yixing wanted to believe it was the oxycodone on his bedside table talking. “I was afraid you’d already left…I’m glad you stayed.”

“I wanted to see if you’d make it.”

Junmyeon laughs, bubbly and expressive, pretty eyes crinkling at the edges. It’s sort of beautiful the way he smiles now that he isn’t maddened by the crash’s trauma.

“My leg made it. It’ll be fine I believe.”

“I’ll be going then.” Yixing says and steps away from the bed a bit hesitantly.

“I’ll wait for your visit.” Junmyeon speaks before Yixing crosses the door.

However Yixing doesn’t turn nor says anything else and leaves.

♦ --- ♦

It’s sort of hard to explain to a worried mother why there’s blood on her son’s shirt and why he looks devastated and worn out after having disappeared all day the moment he enters the house but Yixing tries to explain anyway even if failing.

“There was an accident and…it’s a long story.”

“An accident? Why were you in an accident Yixing?”

“I wasn’t…I was just there, nearby and I--” He breathes out a sigh. “I sort of acted on impulse.”

“Yixing that’s dangerous. You know you shouldn’t--”

“I know.” He doesn’t meet her eyes. “Don’t worry.” It has become the only phrase he’s been able to say for the past years.

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

“I am.” He straightens his back and takes off his shoes sluggishly.

“Did you go by the drug store?”

“.” He curses in a mumble failing to keep it low enough for his mother not to hear. “I forgot.” He tells kicking his last shoe off his foot. “I’m sorry. There were so many things happening today. I’m sorry.” He lets his shoulders slump.

“It’s fine Yixing but I was worried sick.” She turns around, her back facing him. “Just—warn me next time. Don’t be so reckless.”

“I’ll buy them tomorrow.” Yixing says instead. He’s probably not even listening.

His mother sighs and steps away to go to her room. She’s tired and she needs as much rest as she can get. Doctor’s orders. Sometimes though, she feels like her son is just constantly forgetting to think beforehand his own actions and that she has to worry about him double of what she has to worry about herself. She’s constantly scared Yixing might get lost. He is like a picture perfect, a mirror reflection of his father and it pains her. 

omg thank you for the subscriptions ;A; i hope you like this story. the chapters are all of different lengths since i don't want to cut scenes by the middle. this is yeah just the beggining ^^