The sun started to set and Kai’s thoughts still didn’t seem to end. After avoiding it for so long he finally thought about his own relationship with Reita. They had been friends since the second grade; Reita had defended him from the class bully and became almost like he guardian angel and not long after that the two became inseparable, like partners in crime or more like brothers even. They seemed to spend each and every waking moment with each other, if it wasn't Kai over at Reita's house then it Reita at Kai's. Even during the breaks they would be together.

Yet that all changed, the summer before their first year of junior high. Turns out that Reita had a close childhood friend that Kai had never heard of. Of course Kai didn’t expect to know every single little thing about Reita but he was still hurt that Reita kept such a thing from him. Anyways Reita's childhood friend had finally come back from America and apparently Reita had been way closer to him then he had ever been with Kai. His name was Takashima Kouyou, also known as Uruha. Slowly but surely Reita began to hang out with Uruha more and more; it actually got to the point where neither of them saw each other for weeks and when they did it was only for school related things, which was almost never since they had started to take completely different classes.

Eventually Kai had become accustom to the way things were and that meant not having Reita by his side. Surprisingly making new friends on his own wasn’t as hard as he thought. He was a complete social butterfly, apparently back then he thought that Reita was the only friend he ever needed and never bothered to make any other friend. But now he had that chance and he took advantage of it. In his math class there was a small petite boy by the name of Matsumoto Takanori, but he went by Ruki. Apparently he was extremely smart and actually managed to skip a grade, well at least that’s what the rumors said, but anyways he had just transferred in and by the looks of it he hadn’t managed to make any friends and Kai took decided to take advantage of it and became his friend. They became pretty close, maybe even closer than Kai had ever been with Reita. But this time Kai wouldn’t settle for only one friend, his plan was to have various friends so that if one left he would have more to fall back on.

Even though his social life group and his list of friends became extensive there were only a few of those that actually gain his trust and those were the ones that actually grabbed his attention. Like Miyavi, he must have been one of the strangest people Kai had ever met; he acted like a four year old despite the fact that he was older than Kai and somehow that never seemed to bother Kai in fact it seemed to attract him more to the older boy.

Everything seemed to have settled after a while but the Reita came ‘back’ to his life. Apparently Reita had decided that it was time to let Kai meet Uruha, (it’s not like they were dating so Kai didn’t understand why Reita considered it necessary) it was the second semester of their first year in junior high, and Kai had no reason to object and thought that Reita should also meet his friends as well, but then again when he actually thought about it there was no need for that, it wasn’t like they were dating or had an obligation to each other but they did it any ways.

Kai and Uruha much to their surprise became real close friends and Reita seemed rather glad that they were getting along great but when it came to Kai’s relationship with Miyavi, well let’s just say that, that was a completely different story. Whenever they were together Reita’s mood would seem to darken. Kai noticed this and when he confronted Reita, Reita just got mad and of course it ended with a fight verbal of course but a fight none the less. It was actually their first real fight and was over Miyavi but what was even worse was that their fight ended in stalemate. Their cold war even lasted till the end of their third year of junior high. Worse part was that they actually shared a room in the dorms for a while till Kai had his room changed at the beginning of third year after constant pleading to the dorm adviser, yes it really did take him a year and a half but it was worth the wait when he got his own room.

Kai was quite shocked when Reita requested Kai to be his roommate when they were to move into the high school dorms; he could have sworn that Reita would have picked Uruha. At first Kai was iffy but if Reita was willing to mend their friendship then he would too.

And that’s how they were now close once again but not really. Kai seemed to have built an invisible wall to prevent himself from getting too close to Reita.

Kai let out a deep frustrated sigh, hated these feelings, the feelings that caused him so much pain yet so much happiness at the same time; the never ending tug-of-war between the happiness/joy and the heart wrenching pain that these emotions gave him. When exactly did these feelings start to grow he didn’t know or maybe he did: he just did not wish to remember. He couldn’t say that he didn’t understand his feelings for Reita because he knew exactly what it was. He loved Reita with all his heart but unlike him, Reita was completely ‘straight’ and was so very much interested in women and Kai knew that all too. He could latterly feel his heart break every time Reita got a new girlfriend.

A hand softly his now moist cheek. Apparently he had been crying all this time and never actually noticed. “Why is my lovely angel crying,” soft warm lips made contact to Kai’s right cheek and Kai backed away a bit to see the owner of the voice.

“M-Miyavi . . .” yes Miyavi, one of Kai’s closest friends, and if there was anyone in the world that knew him so well then it would Miyavi and even Ruki. As for Reita, well things had changed over the course of time. Miyavi gave him a goofy smile and Kai gave him a weak sleepy one back. Kai’s hands slowly seemed clenched themselves onto Miyavi's shirt as he buried his face into Miyavi’s chest and began to cry. All Miyavi could do now was gently pat Kai’s back and wait, wait till Kai calmed down and would was willing to talk.

Kai slowly backed away and looked at Miyavi, “done?” he asked and Kai nodded as he wiped his snot away with the back of his sleeve. “Now are you going to tell me what happened?” Kai nodded once again.

“R-Reita . . . *hic* h-he . . .”

“He got a new girl?” Kai nodded once again, “Aww Kai, if it hurts you so much, why do you not just tell him how you feel?” Miyavi knew how much it hurt Kai.

“But . . . what if . . .” Miyavi engulfed Kai in a big warm embrace.

“Don’t think like that,” he kissed Kai on the cheek and whispered encouraging things into his ear. Kai began to giggle when Miyavi kept cuddling and kissing him. Don’t think anything of it because Kai surely didn’t.

*Cough, cough*

Kai and Miyavi slowly stopped and turned to look at the glaring gaze given to them.

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