These moments of hope and determination were fleeting. Even though she tried, Ji Hyo could never quite push aside the intrusive thoughts. But how could she? After all, she was very much divorced from her own personal physicality. 

"This IS madness...it really is..." Ji Hyo concluded.

"Seong-Im ah..."

Ji Hyo's silent reverie was interrupted when Young Jee reached out to tap her.

"Seong-Im, 너 괜찮 니?(are you okay?)"

Once again, Ji Hyo looked blankly backed at Young Jee. It wasn't until a few minutes later that she snapped back.

"왜?(Why?) What's it to you? If what you long to hear is that I'm suffering, then I'm sorry. I am more than okay. I'm feeling great and never more alive. So I'm sorry to disappoint you." Ji Hyo has became a master at putting up a front.

In actuality, she felt like she was a monster. A monster with no possesion of a soul.

As she rolled her eyes back into her head and was about to walk off, Ji Hyo said, "아니...I'm not sorry at all, actually! So YOU go away."

Ji Hyo's glance, a withering moral scorn, darted from under her furrowed brow and alighted on Young Jee. 

Young Jee failed to meet Ji Hyo's glance as she looked down anxiously.

"아니 Seong-Im ah...I'm glad that you're okay, 정말로(really). Please take care... Actually...I just wanted to let you know that you can talk to me."

Young Jee watched in embarrassment as Ji Hyo cocked her head to one side and scoffed.

Despite being aware that she needed help, she couldn't bring herself to ask for it. As much as Ji Hyo was ashamed of what she was going through. She was more convinced that no one would understand and that the bullying would just start all over. 

"You're not worthy of help, anyway~. You shouldn't bother people with your childish nonsense you call suffering. Loser~. You deserve to be sad. Why are you not sad? You're feeling empty now? Ha! Loser. You're just a conglomerate garbage heap of loose ends!"

These were the intrusive thoughts that consumed her. But what could she do? Ji Hyo walked to the washroom as she tried to cry. But she couldn't. She could no longer cry or laugh for in her heart, she no longer felt. Behind her eyes was a numb, paralyzed cavern, a pit of hell, a mimicking nothingness.

She screamed and threw her fist to the wall with all the strength she had. Which was very little, indeed. Just then, an intimidating figure appeared in front of her. It looked up maliciously, and bearing a crooked smile, it began to drift slowly towards her as if mocking her and vanished abruptly.

Ji Hyo's eyes widened. Not in horror, but in curiosity. 

"Jong Kook Oppa? Ha. Are you here to mock me too?" She screamed. "Or are you here to be my friend? Why are you disappearing then? WHY! Son of a !" She huffed with unchanging expressions. 

She then proceeded to light a cigarette. Ji Hyo wasn't one who smoked, she hated the smell of it and felt suffocated by it. However, it was utopia for now. Slowly and cautiously, Ji Hyo pressed the lighted cigarette against her skin. 

"ah~ This really is utopia. I'm alive. This is real." She sighed as tears rolled down her cheeks. 

It was only at times like these that she could cry and experience pain. Her thighs were already full of countless scars. But what could she do? Ji Hyo needed something like this to remind her that she was still alive.

However, Ji Hyo wasn't ignorant of her surroundings. She knew that there were girls listening intently and mocking her outside. But once again, Ji Hyo really couldn't care less. At that moment, she was alive. She was happy that she could finally feel a little tinge of sadness again.

Ji Hyo swung the cubical's door open violently, with satisfaction, only to be pulled into a bear hug with Young Jee.

"What the hell do you think you're doing? Get off of me this instance!" Ji Hyo wriggled violently, trying to break out of the disgusting hug as her satisfaction dissipated.

"Don't worry...nobody's looking. I managed to chase them all out by saying I needed to take a smelly . Then I locked the door to make sure." Young Jee joked. "I'm here for you Seong-Im ah...I promise."

"헐!(Heol!) Get off me! Are you a lesbian? Are you interested in me?" Ji Hyo said loud enough for those outside to hear.

"아니, Seong-Im ah." Young Jee gasped, "Why are you being like this?" Tears began to swell in her eyes.

"Because you disgust me!" Ji Hyo exclaimed and pushed her onto the ground.

After overcoming her suffering a long time ago, Young Jee has always been a mature, strong yet compassionate being. However, Young Jee was on the floor, mouth agape and tears rushing out of her native springs.

What Ji Hyo has said and done to her brought her right back to the horrid days of her suffering. Right then, Ji Hyo came to a sudden realization. As she looked at Young Jee, all Ji Hyo could see was herself- abused, afraid, alone. Ji Hyo realized that she pushed away the only real friend that she would ever have in a long time to come.

Too bad she only realized this now...