Now or Never
Please Love Me AgainTwo years had passed. Two years of no communication with Han Ri and Jongin. I can still remember the night when I decided to run away. To run away from this complicated love story I share with my best friends.
Flashback:
It was 12:00 midnight and I cannot sleep thinking of what happened in the past days. All of it happened so fast, so fast that I lost track of what happened to our friendship now. I wrote a letter to Han Ri, telling her that I have to go away for some time. I need space, just like her. I need a break too. I’m torn between us, friendship and love. Of all the people, why me ? why us? They’re only the ones I have in my life.
To Jongin, I didn’t write any letter though. Not even a proper farewell, for I am afraid. Afraid that I might give him false hopes. And afraid at the same time that if I told him to stop waiting for me, I might regret it for the rest of my life. Because deep inside, I know, I have fallen for him too.
I withdraw some of my savings in the bank and fix all the needed requirements for transferring to another school. I got a flight the day after and I went back to the province where I came from, where my foster parents are. I studied hard and focus my full attention in the career I’m pursuing, Bachelor of Science in Communication Arts, and I become one of the rising theater actress in South Korea.
I was really coward, and I regret it so much for being so. Even Han Ri already sacrificed her own feelings to give Jongin and I a chance, but I wasted it. I chose to run away. Everyday, thoughts of Jongin always cross my mind. How was he when I’ve gone ? How is he now? Is he doing fine?
I can’t take it anymore. Everyday I’m holding myself, trying not to call him or see how he had been. But not today. Today, I tried my luck and dial his number as how I remember it. My heart, my heart was beating so fast in the first ring. He was still using it. I waited and three more ringing passed until a female voice answered
“Hello?” a very familiar voice and I’m getting nervous.
“Hello.. i-is Jongin there?” I asked, uneasiness evident.
“Sorry but he went out for a while. Who is this?” she asked again, this time I hear cries of a baby in the background.
“W-who are y-you?” my voice now shaking. Aware that seconds later, I might break my own heart.
“This is Han Ri, his wife. Who’s this ?” she asked again and tried to hush the baby.
I dropped my phone and it fell on the floor. The way that it breaks into pieces cannot be compared to how my heart feels right now. It hurts so badly. It’s too late. I was a coward. It’s my entire fault.
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