2013.06.15

∞

On my way back home, I hoped my mood wouldn’t get spoiled once I got back into that prison.

But when I got to the front door I could already hear them shouting at each other.

Getting in between them would only get things worst, as I would be pulled into their fighting, and if they notice me upon entering they would vent their anger on me asking a question after another, so I opted to wander for a while around my own home that was each passing day transforming from a warm shelter to a cold desolated shell.

When they first started fighting I thought it wouldn't last, that it would be just a temporary thing and then they would get back to be just a normal married couple. I was so dead wrong. It never ended and I wasn't even able to understand why we were still living all together under the same roof even though all it brought was their continue fight over everything.

I wasn't hoping for their divorce in the beginning. I thought that maybe a pause from each other, staying away for a while, could help them; but that didn't happen and I supposed that now wouldn't even help a tiny bit. However with the current situation I was actually wishing that they got divorced as the situation was really out of control and I was already too devastated.

I roamed around for about an hour before deciding to get home to whatever situation was going on.

∞

To my surprise opening the door I didn't hear them arguing, so making as little sound as I could, I went through the hallway to the stairs, noticing my father on the sofa watching the TV in the living room, and I supposed my mother was upstarts in what used to be their room.

Just as I was about to lie down on the bed I heard a light knock on the door.

"Come in" I said going towards the door.

"Were you going to sleep?" My mother asked, a broken smile appearing on her face, as she opened rather door to come in.

"Actually yes" I said softly "what's the matter?" I asked noticing her nervous movements and how she repeatedly one of her arms as if she was anxious and that was the only comfort that was at her disposal.

"Maybe we should sit down?!" She said uncertain.

"Mmh...okay." I said going to sit on the edge of the bed, while she sat in front of me on the chair. "So what do you wanna say" I asked once again as she wasn't talking but just staring a point on the floor in between me and the door.

"Right..." her tone soft and in some way broken as she spoke. “Joon... I... We are..." I noticed her eyes getting teary before she brought one of her hands up to cover her eyes trying to calm down.

Even though I was almost sure of what she was going to say to me, I waited to hear those words come out from .

"We are getting divorced." I just nodded. I wasn't sad because I was old enough to understand what was happening and that in this situation this was the only choice, but I couldn't and still can't say that those predictable words didn't hurt me. I felt as though those words were actual blades slicing my heart and my lungs, but I couldn't let that pain transpire, at least not at that very moment, because that would make both if us broke down into pieces.

"What I wanted to ask yours with whom you'll prefer to stay daily..."

"Mom you know you can't ask me that, it's -"

"Unfair!?"

"Exactly..." I said while lowering my head to look at my feet.

"Dear..." She said getting closer. "We, me and your father, know we put you through some hard times and probably scarred you in more than one way, and we are sorry for that... We are going to try to be good parents and for doing that we need you to choose one of us or it’s going to become a dispute on the tribunal. We already decided that you’re going to stay under both our custody but you should decide whose house you’re going to stay at..." Her eyes were pleading for forgiveness and understanding. I wasn't the only one scarred that's what they made me realise even more.

"I understand... Can I have some time to think about it?" I asked.

"Surely... Don't need to rush yourself into the decision... You are probably tired right? You had fun with your friends?"

"Yes I'm a bit tired and had fun."

"Alright, I'm going to let you sleep. Goodnight dear." She said getting up from the chair to come near and hug me.

Even though that night my family officially fell apart, that casual conversation at the end made me remember old times, when they didn't shout at each other and I was somehow more important. I missed those days even more now, since they were really gone.

"Goodnight mom." I said before we broke the hug, me getting into my bed sheets and my mother leaving to her room.

∞

To tell you the truth I originally didn't mean to spend so many chapters on Suho...

But once I started with his story I just couldn't leave him...

From next chapter I'm going to go back to the protagonist of this story ;)

So I'll be gome for about a week so there are not going to be any updates for about two/three weeks since as soon as I get back I'll have to study hard u.u . . . ㅠ ㅠ 

However hope you're guys are having a great time :) It's summer <3

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