Chansung and Minjun bring Wooyoung back to his house. Nichkhun also follow them from behind. Chansung is really worried, after the scene earlier, Wooyoung do not speak a word. Chansung looks at Minjun asking for help. Minjun just shrugged his shoulder. Truthfully, he doesn’t know what to do. He can help Wooyoung to calm down from his panic attack but how can he tend Wooyoung’s broken heart. Minjun sighs heavily. Chansung drag Wooyoung to the door of his room when suddenly Wooyoung stop him. Wooyoung push Chansung’s hand away.

“P…Pl…please…leave me alone…” he said weakly. His voice trembles slightly. Chansung just let Wooyoung do whatever he wants. He knows that his cousin needs some time for himself. Wooyoung walk closer to the door. He places his hand on the door handle. His hand is clearly shaking. Wooyoung hold the door’s handle tightly until his hand turn white. His breathing becomes heavier. Minjun realizes Wooyoung behavior. He rushes toward Wooyoung.

“Wooyoung…” he calls. Wooyoung doesn’t reply. The tremble becomes stronger. Minjun place his hand on Wooyoung’s shoulder. He needs to do something since Wooyoung has starts to show the symptoms of his panic attack. Chansung looks with worried eyes. He is aware of what is happening.

“Wooyoung…” Minjun calls again. He hugs Wooyoung trying to calm him down. Nichkhun just watch from where he stands. He knows that the same thing happen at the funeral is going to happen again. He had realizes for a while now. After the dinner party he had been researching about Wooyoung weird behavior and Nichkhun is pretty sure that Wooyoung is suffering from severe panic attack.

“Hyung…it’s only been 30 minutes. It’s happening too fast.” Chansung screams shocked Nichkhun. He doesn’t have the slightest idea how he can help Wooyoung. Wooyoung kneels to the floor and he is clutching his chest. His breathe shorten and he looks like he’s struggling too breath. Minjun try calling him several time. Wooyoung can’t hear anything. His tears start to fall again.

“It’s too painful.” He thought. Wooyoung can feel someone embracing him, trying to calm him down. He try to breath properly, but the flash of memories of his parent separation in his childhood, the time he caught Taecyeon on the bed with another men, the time he saw Taecyeon being carried away by the stretcher, Taecyeon lying unconscious, Taecyeon last breath, Taecyeon…Taecyeon…Taecyeon...Wooyoung is losing it. The trembles become stronger. He feels like dying when suddenly Wooyoung feels a sharp pain at his arm and he becomes drowsy. Slowly Wooyoung become unconscious.

After confirming that Wooyoung has calm down, Minjun released a relieve sigh. That was the worst panic attack he ever saw occur to Wooyoung, and he doesn’t have any choice besides injecting him with some sedative. Both Chansung and Nichkhun feels relieve too. Chansung walks toward Wooyoung and Minjun and pick Wooyoung up to put him on his bed. After several minutes Chansung comes out bringing a box with him.

“I’ve picked all the thing that can make him remember.” Chansung said while placing the box on the table before sitting on one of the chair in the living room.

“…I don’t take his clothes thought…” he continues. His voice weakened. Minjun nods understanding.

“At least Wooyoung won’t see it as soon as he wakes up.” Minjun reasons out. Chansung palmed his face.

“He’s really gone hyung. Taec hyung is really gone.” Chansung said weakly. Minjun just able to nod weakly. It was so sudden. Even he himself can’t process the event clearly. He wonders how Wooyoung can take it.

“We need to be strong Chansung, so that Wooyoung can be strong too. We have to, because this time…” Minjun can’t continue what he wants to say. One drops of tear fall to his face. Taecyeon was like his family.

“…this time we can’t call Taec for help…” Minjun said shakily. Chansung keep his silent. He closes his eyes tightly, preventing with all his might from crying. Nichkhun just sit there, watching them in silent.

“If they are this affected by Taecyeon death… then I can’t imagine what will happen to you, Wooyoung.” Nichkhun thought while watching the door to Wooyoung’s room.

After several minutes, Nichkhun excuse himself to go back to his own house. Once he enters his house, he catches glances of an envelope on the table in his living room. He sighs heavily. After the accidents, the nurse hand him the entire thing Taecyeon had with him. Everyone was so lost that Nichkhun doesn’t have any choice but to keep the envelope first. Nichkhun sit on one of the chairs and open the envelope pulling out the entire thing in there. It was Taecyeon’s wallet, smart phone, watch, car key and when Nichkhun’s hand touches a box, he stops. He pulls out the box slowly and he recognizes the black velvet box immediately. Nichkhun sighs again.

“...how can I give this to him Taec?” Nichkhun asks at the thin air. He feels loss and helpless.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………

The next day, Nichkhun comes with heavy footstep to Wooyoung house bringing the envelope with him. He inhales deeply before he knocks the door. After several seconds, the door opens revealing Minjun. Nichkhun steps in. Once inside, he is being greeted by Chansung who is busy cooking in the kitchen. Nichkhun catch a glance of Wooyoung who is sitting silently at the dinner table. Nichkhun feels terrible.

“What bring you here, Khun?” Minjun asks once Nichkhun has properly sits on the chair. Both Minjun and Chansung stay at Wooyoung house in case anything happen. Nichkhun glance at Wooyoung again before looking at Minjun guiltily.

“I don’t know if I should bring this here of not.” Nichkhun speak hesitantly. He places the envelope he brought with him on the table. Minjun looks at him confuse.

“What is that?” Minjun asks.

“…It’s Taecyeon…”Nichkhun said slowly in hope that Wooyoung won’t hear him. Minjun eyes become wider. He’s really shocks. Nichkhun curses inside his mind.

“How can I be so stupid not to ask him first?” he thought. Nichkhun gulps the knot in his throat. Minjun was going to hide the envelope when suddenly a voice stops him.

“What is that?” both Nichkhun and Minjun turn their head to the source of the voice. It is Wooyoung. Chansung is following him from behind.

“What is in the envelope?” Wooyoung asks again. Surprisingly his voice sound so calm, only a bit weaker. Minjun glance at Chansung questioningly, and Chansung only shook his head.

“Wooyoung…” Minjun trails off when Wooyoung walk closer.

“I’m fine hyung. The sedative is still working.” Wooyoung explains calmly. Minjun feels really guilty.

“I’m sorry…” Minjun said bowing his head.

“It’s ok hyung. You’ve save me.” Wooyoung said before grabbing the envelope in Minjun hand and take one of the sit. All of them watch Wooyoung in silent. Wooyoung open the envelope and spread everything inside it on the table. His eyes become watery when he sees everything that is so familiar to him. Minjun and Chansung look at each other nervously. They need to prepare because Wooyoung can break down anytime. Wooyoung scans the item one by one when a black velvet box catches his sights. Minjun and Chansung gasp silently. They are pretty sure what the meaning of that box is. Wooyoung reach for the box slowly. His hand is clearly trembling. Nichkhun can’t bear to look at Wooyoung.

“This is the moment…” he thought.

Wooyoung observe the box intently before he decides to open the box. With trembling hand, he opens the lid revealing a white gold ring.

Wooyoung picks the ring up and the engraving inside the ring caught his attention.

“2 my love JWY…1314…love OTY”. He smiles and without his consent, drops of tears start falling again.

Flashback…

“Woo…let’s get married.” Taecyeon said out of the blue while they spend time together in their living room.

“Huh?” Wooyoung said, totally shock with Taecyeon question.

“I said let’s get married.” Taecyeon said again.

“Why so sudden?” Wooyoung asks totally confuse. Taecyeon is not the type to acts on impulse. Taecyeon stare at him, trying hard not to smile. He likes teasing Wooyoung.

“Woo, you’re mean. You don’t want to marry me even when you take my ity. I hate you.” He faked whine. Wooyoung blush at Taecyeon’s words.

“When did I take your ity? It’s you that take mine…” Wooyoung said and pout. Taecyeon can’t hold it any longer and he burst out laughing.

“You’re my first too you know.” Taecyeon said whispering. Wooyoung ears turn bright red.

“Shut up!” Wooyoung said turning his attention to the TV once again.

“But, I’m serious Woo. Let’s get married.” Taecyeon said again. Wooyoung look at him confuse.

“You have too much admirer and I’m jealous. You’re mine. Only mine.” Taecyeon emphasizes the word mine. Wooyoung rolls his eyes.

“…and what about you? you’re popular too…and you’ve been flirting around too much.” Wooyoung said clearly annoyed.

“…are you jealous?” Taecyeon asks while smirking.

“Of course I am. You’re m…mi…mines too…” Wooyoung said shyly. He’s completely red by now. Taecyeon smile turn wider.

“I’ll stop when I become your husband.” Taecyeon said confidently. Wooyoung eyes him suspiciously.

“Uncle doesn’t stop even when he’s married to your mom.” Wooyoung said.

“Baby…you’re mean. You can’t compare me with my father.” Taecyeon said faking hurt. Wooyoung rolls his eyes again.

“Taec, you’re the exact replica of him.” Wooyoung said knowingly. Taecyeon smile guiltily.

“Maybe I am…but I can try…should I show you some prove?” Taecyeon ask eager. Wooyoung thinks deeply about Taecyeon question.

“Maybe you should…then, buy me a ring then propose. Who knows, I might say yes.” Wooyoung said teasing. He would love to settle down with Taecyeon, but teasing his boyfriend once in a while won’t hurt.

“What with the might? You SHOULD say yes.” Taecyeon said warningly. Wooyoung giggle.

“Of course I will.” Wooyoung said happily. Taecyeon smile again. He leans toward Wooyoung and gives him a peck.

“What type of ring do you want?” Taecyeon asks. Wooyoung stay silent for a while, thinking.

“A white gold ring…with an engraving of 1314…” he said after a while.

“1314?” Taecyeon asks confuse.

“It means forever Taec.” Wooyoung explains.

“Then forever it is.” Taecyeon confirm and hugs Wooyoung tightly.

End of flashback…

Wooyoung trace the engraving slowly, reading the words one by one.

“2…my…love…Jang Wooyoung…forever…love Ok Taecyeon…” Wooyoung takes the ring and slips it on his fingers.

“It seems you still remember, what took you so long Taec?” he said while playing with the ring on his finger. Wooyoung look at Chansung, Minjun and Nichkhun who don’t say a thing.

“Thanks Khun for bringing this to me.” He said sincerely before standing up walking to his room. Before he enters he turns around to look at all of them…

“I’m sorry, but I need to be alone.” Wooyoung said and disappear from the living room. All of them just watch his disappearing figure.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………

After several weeks of going back and forth to the treatment and therapy, Wooyoung seems to be livelier. He stills looks like a living corpse, but at least he can start to live like normal people. He also has started working too. Chansung sighs relieve with Wooyoung progress. The first few weeks for his cousin were terrible. He wasn’t eating. He wasn’t sleeping. He wasn’t doing anything. The nightmare, the panic attacks that were the worst Chansung ever seen. Chansung has been living with Wooyoung ever since the funeral to keep an eye for Wooyoung. Sometime Junho comes to visit him and sleep there too. Everyone come to visit once in a while. Nichkhun and Minjun visit every day. The worst experience for Chansung was when Wooyoung woke up from his nightmare and screaming, calling for Taecyeon. Chansung can feel his heart broken every time Wooyoung did.

“Please stop his suffering.” Chansung often prays. To see Wooyoung back to work give Chansung slight hope. Even when Wooyoung acts like robot, repeating to himself again and again…

“Need to make myself busy…”Chansung is glad.

“At least he’s doing something.” Chansung thought.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Nichkhun also keeps eyes for Wooyoung. Wooyoung always go to work a bit later than Chansung, and Nichkhun always follows Wooyoung from behind with his car to ensure that Wooyoung arrives safely to the shop. He is also relieved that Wooyoung was able to break out from his routine on spacing out and doing nothing. Today is like any regular day. Nichkhun wakes up early, making a cup of tea and bring it out to the balcony to enjoy it. He loves the balcony. He has many sweet memories there. Even when Wooyoung didn’t come out from the next balcony, at least the memories that Nichkhun had spending time there with Wooyoung keep him happy. Nichkhun smile content. He was enjoying the breeze when suddenly he hears the sound of glass breaking. Nichkhun walk closer to Wooyoung’s house balcony to catch a glimpse of what happening inside the room. Nichkhun knows that Wooyoung is sleeping in there.

“Wooyoung…” he calls out. He waits for several minutes and the sounds stops.

“Wooyoung…” he tries to call again. Nothing happen. The silent worries Nichkhun. He was going to fetch his phone to call Chansung when his ears catch the sounds of door being open. Nichkhun walks back to his previous position and he sees Wooyoung crawling out, bleeding. His face is terribly pale. Nichkhun is seriously shock. He dialed Chansung number and informs him about Wooyoung before he rushes to Wooyoung house. Nichkhun calls the security guard to unlock the door before he rush to where Wooyoung is. Once Nichkhun enters the room, he was beyond shock. Glasses and blood are everywhere. He tiptoed to the balcony. When Nichkhun reach Wooyoung, he can hears Chansung voice from outside.

“Udong…where are you?” Chansung screams.

“He’s here. In the balcony.” Nichkhun screams back. Nichkhun walks closer and he can see that Wooyoung is breathing heavily and crying.

“Udong, what happen to you?” Nichkhun turns toward Chansung that has also arrive at the balcony. Chansung rush to Wooyoung and try to calm him down.

“It’s ok, Udong. It’s ok. Everything is going to be fine.” Chansung said slowly. Nichkhun doesn’t know what to do. He remembers what Chansung had told him several weeks earlier. Wooyoung suffer the panic attack almost every day. In the earlier week, the panic attacks occur 5 to 6 times a day. It was difficult for Wooyoung. Nichkhun feels happy that after the treatment the panic attacks lessen to once a day or at most 3 times a day. But the nightmare, it becomes intense. Nichkhun doesn’t even want to comprehend how Wooyoung can stand to wake up after having nightmare of the love of his live leaving him again and again.

“It must be hell…” Nichkhun thought. He really wants to do something to help Wooyoung, something to at least reduce his suffering. Nichkhun watch as Chansung tries his best to calm Wooyoung down but to no avail. Nichkhun can’t stand to look anymore. He moves closer toward them.

“Let me try.” He says to Chansung. Chansung release Wooyoung and give some space for Nichkhun.

“Wooyoung...what happen to you? Why do you cry?” Nichkhun hold Wooyoung’s chin and raise it so that Wooyoung face him. Wooyoung’s crying has turn into sob. Nichkhun sweep the tears away from Wooyoung’s eyes. Nichkhun stare at him for a few moments before hugging him tightly. Nichkhun can’t help from blushing. He can feel Wooyoung’s body heat and breathing. He was rubbing comforting circle on Wooyoung’s back. Wooyoung feels a bit calmer from the hug.

“It feels the same like Taecyeon…but his scent is different.” He thought.

Wooyoung then start talking between his sob.

“Taec...sob...is...sob...leaving...sob...me...sob...again. Make...sob…him...sob...stop. Please...”

 Wooyoung whimper. Nichkhun can literally feel his heart broken into pieces when he hears that. He just stays there in silent. He stays that way for minute when he starts to feel weird. Wooyoung has been too silent. No sound and no movement come from him except his chest rising up and down showing that he’s still breathing. Wooyoung has passed out. Nichkhun pick Wooyoung up and carry him into his bedroom. He tucks Wooyoung into the bed and start cleaning the mess on the floor. He picks the picture and saw Wooyoung smiling happily in Taecyeon embrace. He feels the pain in his heart again. He place the picture on the table and he turn to look at Chansung.

“Wow, Khun. After Taec hyung, you’re the only person that’s able to calm Udong that fast.” Chansung comment amused. Nichkhun smile weakly. Chansung was trying to say something when Minjun come through the door.

“Is everything ok?” Minjun asks panting. He rushes to the apartment as fast as he can after he heard about Wooyoung from Chansung.

“Udong is sleeping. He’s having another nightmare and panic attack, but Khun able to calm him down.” Chansung explains briefly. Minjun turns his head to look at Nichkhun. Nichkhun only smile.

“Seriously, why can’t I do that? I’m his doctor.” Minjun mumbles.

“I can’t do it too hyung.” Chansung reasons out. Minjun sighs.

“Whatever. I need to tend his injury. The nightmare and panic attack are worst enough and now you’re trying to injure yourself too, Wooyoung?” Minjun said while cleaning Wooyoung injury.

“We can’t leave Udong like this hyung.” Chansung said worried.

“We have no other choice unless we let Wooyoung stay with Nichkhun. Nichkhun definitely can calm him down every time the panic attacks occur.” Minjun said casually. Chansung eyes gleams with hope. Nichkhun becomes startle.

“Wooyoung…living together with him?” he thought.

“What do you think Khun?” Minjun asks still busy cleaning Wooyoung injury. Nichkhun gulp.

“What should he say?” he wonder.

“Can you help Udong, Khun…hyung?” Chansung asks, hoping. Nichkhun is shocks. Chansung rarely call him hyung.

“I…I’ll think about it.” Nichkhun stutter. Chansung smile widely and Minjun smirk.

.......................................................................................................................................................

a/n: i'm not really sure about this chapter....