Ten things that creep into Luhan’s mind when sleep eludes him at night:

1. It’s been two years now and wow, look how far they’ve come. These days, everything is all just about moving forward, rushing towards deadlines, comebacks and stumbling into stage after stage. For an idol, there seems to be no time for looking back. Sometimes, even living in the now seems to be impossible too as they are constantly pushed to move move move that they don’t even have the time to be proud of themselves and what they had accomplished.

2. His heart aches for home more than anything. The previous album promotions only afforded them meager time to perform and endorse in China, much less in Beijing and as much as it kills him, he suppresses the all-consuming urge to just breakdown and cry because there’s quiet Yixing who misses his grandparents in Changsha so much, Wu Fan who sheds a few tears for his mother when he thinks no one is looking and Zitao, young and childish Zitao who needs to be supported and encouraged more than anyone else. Luhan needs to keep it together, not for himself but for his fellow Chinese band mates because he feels an unspoken responsibility to look out for them and keep them all together in any way he can.

3. On a related matter, he’s happy about the promotion scheme for Overdose this time because just like during MAMA season, they are separated into their respective units and M is given longer time to stay and advertise in China. He likes performing in other countries, of course but there’s just something truly gratifying about singing and dancing to his heart’s content in his own homeland.

4. Which presents another dilemma considering his Korean members will once again leave Korea for an indeterminate amount of time. He recognized right away Jongdae’s and Minseok’s smiles that didn’t quite reach their eyes when the new arrangements were laid out. Sure they act like it’s perfectly okay, like nothing has changed in the first place but Luhan knows pretension like the back of his hand. He’s been doing the same thing after all. When you’re in this business, pretension is necessary, sometimes encouraged even. He only hopes to help both Minseok and Jongdae and make the upcoming experiences less difficult for them. Not all fans realize how EXO-M has it harder and that in all truthfulness, at the very beginning, they know that they got the short end of the bargain.

5. He realizes that pink or blonde hair doesn’t look good on him. Light and chocolate brown, however, now that’s a look Luhan totally rocks in. And it’s not because that’s what Minseok commented to him the other day at the dressing room while they were getting ready for the comeback stage, of course not. That’s just downright silly.

6. In an attempt to goof around and embarass him, there was this one disturbing fan fiction Chanyeol and Jongdae had deliberately printed about him and Kai (kailu is what their pairing is called, apparently) and although neither he nor Jongin had the stomach to read the entire thing, he saw the very detailed and graphic fan art that came with it and told himself to refrain from using the internet for a while.

7. Yixing snores loudly. Well, only when he’s tired and right now, he seems to be dead tired because Luhan is pretty sure the villagers at Saskatchewan can hear the orchestra that is Zhang Yixing’s loud breathing (at which point, he comes over to the other bed and gently runs his hand soothingly on the younger boy’s back and the sounds at least decrease a little bit).

8. He doesn’t like the way Minseok has drastically lost weight, doesn't like it one bit. The term baozi has lost all meaning because those once-puffy cheeks look like they can now cut glass. It bothers Luhan so much that Minseok has to undergo this outrageous diet regimen that could very well border on unhealthy. So while Wu Fan and Zitao distract the manager, he takes to slipping extra food on Minseok’s plate diligently during eating time.

9. It's 11' o clock and Luhan suddenly craves for a steaming hot pot.

10. He wishes he could wake Minseok from the other room so they could sneak out and go to the nearest Chinese restaurant.

(but in a moment of impulsiveness, he suddenly thinks the night is still young so why the hell not and does exactly that)

I'm not sure what I just wrote there, and oh my gosh, was that a hint of angst? It's been quite a while since I've written anything so forgive the rusty writing. More Xiuhan to come now that I actually have free time. Yehet. Thanks for subscribing!